He’d never known a hospital to smell like dirt. Okay, maybe not dirt exactly. But rain and trees and dirt.

Henry sat on a wooden stool by the wall of the hospital room. ZhouMi and his Gupo, his mother’s aunt, chattered about things he could not understand. The wrinkled old lady had a lot of energy for someone recently hospitalized. ZhouMi told him she’d had something of a heart attack several weeks ago. Really, the only indication of her poor health was the IV tube stuck in her hand. That and the oxygen tanks which looked too fancy to be in an ancient room like this.*

“Xianhua,” Gupo called. It took Henry a second to realize she was talking to him. For probably the hundredth time since he’d met her, she asked him if he remembered. If he remembered her, if he remembered his grandma, grandpa, or even his own name. This time it was her apartment building. Henry shook his head, no.

“Well, then when I get out of here, that’s the first place I’m taking you!” She shook her finger at him like his forgetting was something to be reprimanded with a visit to her house. According to ZhouMi, Gupo had loved Henry as a child and whenever he visited China as a kid, he and his sister would stay with her. Apparently everyone expected him to remember her because of this, but he didn’t, of course. The last time he’d visited China was when he was six, before his grandma became sick. Now at fifteen, Gupo meant nothing more than the old woman lying before him.

Henry tried to look bored by staring outside the window, uninterested. He heard a beat of silence before ZhouMi started a new conversation with her. His heart twanged with guilt. He hated being rude, but all the questions were starting to make him uncomfortable. To distract himself, he focused on the view outside. From the barred windows you could see the other hospital buildings poking out over a puddle of treetops. It was more of those willows. Henry swore they were everywhere. What did that Amber girl call them again? Something-tree. Henry scowled. Why did he just leave her like that? He would give anything now to have another English speaker around.

There was a tap on his shoulder. “Henry, I’m going to refill Gupo’s hot water. You talk to her for a bit okay?” ZhouMi’s words sounded less like a question than a demand.

With his cousin gone, Henry was left to sit alone with Gupo. He almost wished there was another person in the second bed, just to soak up some of the awkward.

“Do you like living with your ZhouMi gege?” Gupo broke the silence.

Henry shrugged. He wasn’t quite sure how to answer considering a) he’d lived with Gupo before so she might not like his answer and b) he had no idea how he felt about living in with the smiley man.

“He’s a good kid that one. Does he call you Henry or Xianhua?” She pronounced ‘Henry’ like ‘Hen-li.’

“Nobody calls me Xianhua,” he said, hoping to get the message through to her. The only time anyone called him by his middle name was when a substitute teacher called role and accidentally looked at the wrong column.

Instead, Gupo looked sadly upon him. “That’s a shame. That name was picked out by your Waigong and WaiPo*. You should tell your family to use it.”

That would never happen, but Henry nodded to appease her. Gupo went back to talking about ZhouMi. Sometimes she would ask him the occasional question which he would respond to with a half-hearted shrug. Truth was, he couldn’t understand most of what she said. She spoke so fast, not deliberately like ZhouMi. The more Henry tried to listen the more confused he became until he just stopped trying.

His eyes drifted across the crumbling green walls so unlike the hospital white he’d always known. This place was so weird. Henry was still drifting when Gupo reached out and grasped his hand. Henry startled. Her skin was paper, but her grasp was rope.

“Xianhua,” she asked with an intensity in her eyes. “Do you like China?”

“Uh, I-I’m supposed to- I don’t know but-,” Henry stuttered. These weren’t the right words. “I like it.” From the moment the words left his lips, he knew they were a lie. Gupo seemed to know it too. “I have to go to the bathroom,” he blurted.

“Down the hall to your left,” she said.

Henry nodded. She didn’t let go of his hand so he hand to pull it out. He ran out of the room feeling like the lamest on earth.

Without any real direction, Henry decided to just go to the bathroom. Maybe some water would help.

Coming to China was the worst idea ever. Just when he’d finally become American enough for the Americans, he was letting everyone down by not being Chinese enough for China. He was sick of feeling guilty all the time. Guilty for not being able to speak or read Chinese, guilty for not liking the Chinese food ZhouMi made him, guilty for not knowing these strangers like his own family. He hated this. His mother should have just left well enough alone.

Nobody was in the bathroom as Henry ran the faucet and splashed water on his face. There weren’t any paper towels so he just used his shirt. He was wiping away the last of the water when he heard a furious yelling. It was coming from outside in the courtyard probably. Henry probably would have just left it at that except some of the words…Were they in English? Curiosity piqued, Henry scrambled closer to the bathroom windows. They were up high but not too high with a toilet beneath you.

“Well then, why’d you invite me here?” A man’s voice yelled. It was clear cut English with maybe a northern accent. Amber’s face flashed though his mind. Could the man be talking to her? It seemed impossible yet so did their first meeting.

The voice that came next spoke with a mix of both Chinese and English. “I wanted you to meet my family! Not to - - -!” Henry couldn’t understand the last part.

“Is that seriously what you think that was? Nobody could tell anything from what I did in there! Now you, you freaking out about it? That they could tell!”

Henry grabbed the bars of the window and tried to yank himself up. The second voice sounded soft but not necessarily feminine. Of course, Amber didn’t sound too girly either. Dammit, why did he have no upper body strength!?

“If you weren’t planning on telling anyone than why am I here?”

“I never said anything like that, Yifan! Don’t put words in my mouth!”

Yifan. Did Amber mention a Yifan? Amber didn’t mention anybody. Finally, Henry managed to pull him face up to window. Down in the yard below, two men stood face to face. Instead of disappointment though, Henry’s curiosity went through the roof. The angle wasn’t too great but he swore he’d seen those guys before.

The one with a small mouth glared daggers at the one with sharp eyes.

“So what? I just not allowed to touch you anymore is that it?”

Sharp-eyes’ reply was too soft for him to make out clearly. Something about “hands,” “public,” and “whispering.” The burning in Henry’s arms was making it kind of hard to concentrate. Small mouth’s reply was also quite soft but their exchanges grew steadily in volume until he grabbed the other by the shoulders and yelled “I love you” loud enough for half the courtyard to hear. That’s when Sharp-eyes slapped him.

“Holy cr-!” Henry didn’t get to finish his sentence since that’s when is arms gave out, his foot slipped into the toilet, and he fell -first onto the cold bathroom cement.

Yanking his foot out of the toilet, Henry scrambled up into the still empty bathroom. He listened but the window was silent now. If it was because they’d heard him and left or because they were finished arguing, he didn’t know. What he did know was that he need to leave. Now.

A custodian mopped in by the bathroom hallway as he came charging out. His foot dripped on her clean floor. Henry wanted to tell her it didn’t matter since those tiles would be clean anyways but didn’t.

Where had he seen those guys before? Should he ask ZhouMi? How would he even phrase that? ‘Hey, so I saw two gay guys outside the bathroom window; do you have any idea where I would know them from?’  He didn’t even know what ‘gay’ was in Chinese. He didn’t stop until he reached Gupo’s room where he stopped dead in his tracks.

Gupo stopped whatever sentence she was on and stared up at the ceiling. ZhouMi looked up with surprise which quickly melted into disappointment when he saw Henry. Henry swallowed. Every feeling from before the bathroom came rushing back. Especially guilt. Mostly guilt. The words ‘I’m sorry’ balanced on his tongue. He would have said them too, except he still wasn’t sure what he was sorry for.

ZhouMi didn’t tell him off though. The older grabbed his things and walked over to slowly. “Gupo has to rest now, Henry. Tell her goodbye.”

The old woman still didn’t look at him. Henry hesitated.

“Gupo…zaijian.*”

When she didn’t seem to acknowledge his words, ZhouMi tugged him away. It wasn’t until he was out the door did he hear her final words to him.

“Xianhua, zaijain.”

Waigong and Waipo are grandparents on your mother's side. Gong = male; Po = female

Zajian = goodbye or more literally, see you again

I could probably go on forever about hospital corruption in China, but this chapter is more about plot than anything so I won't. I actually had a lot of trouble deciding between posting this chapter first or the next one, but since I made this one first I'll only have a couple edits to the next chapter before posting.