F I N A L :

A F T E R    N I N E    Y E A R S . . .

I sit in my usual place in this cafeteria which is next to the glass wall. I watch how people are walking and some are running going to their appointments for the day. Sipping my cup of caramel macchiato, I took a deep sighed. Today, I am going to fly back to Korea for the fashion show that I am going to handle. After nine long years, I became a fashion designer. It wasn’t my dream actually, but when the time passes by I find myself loving clothes. I started sketching in the back of my notebook and eventually in a sketchpad.

Checking my watch, it says 8:30 in the morning. My flight is in the afternoon, so I still have few hours to unwind. I’ve been so busy this past few weeks to prepare all the clothes that will be using in the fashion show and I think this is the perfect time to unwind for a while. I am sure that when we landed on Korea, the following days will be hectic as hell. We just have about a week to prepare and inspect everything and I know we will be busy afterwards. I took a last sip and then stood up, making my way to the exit.

***

    “Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Incheon International Airport. Local time is 8 o'clock in the evening and the temperature is 24°C.”

The announcement reaches its end and when the flight attendants assured us that we are all safe to stand, I took my teddy bear that I named Lulu because of Lu Han. Lu Han was a soccer player way back to my middle school days and this teddy bear was wearing a soccer uniform so I kind of named it before him. After I went abroad, I haven’t received any news about him. Let’s say, I am avoiding it. I want to focus on my study because we all know that I am not smart.

After reading his letter, God knows how hurt I am. I didn’t know, I am not aware. There’s regret but I guess that’s what fate is for. Maybe we weren’t meant for each other. Our time didn’t meet, maybe that’s what fate’s way of separating the both of us. I’m heartbroken so does he. I didn’t know that he also have feelings for me. Am I that numb for not feeling it? Or he was just silent about it.

I decided to stay at the hotel rather than in our house. It wouldn’t be necessary because I have to work near with the staffs and staying at the hotel is the most convenient way to get in touch with them easily. I jumped on the bed and close my eyes. I felt a little bit dizzy, jet lag.

***

“I need to meet all the models, please call them right away.”

I said without looking to the person I am talking with as I scanned all the clothes that were hanging in the closet. I nodded as he answered that he will call them. I called one of the staff,

“I need another one of this, hurry!”

She nodded and then I walk around the place to check all the decorations and such.

“Almost perfect, thank you for hard working!”

I announced. I smiled and then walk back to the back stage.

“They’re here. But the two models that will be wearing your new designs are still not here.”

“WHAT? Did they know how important this fashion show to me?”

I said almost shouted. I heard they are popular here in Korea, but still… that was not enough reason to be late when we all arrived here on time. I’ve told them that I should be the one choosing my models but they insisted and now I am getting impatience waiting for the two.

“Call them right away.”

I said sternly and then turned my gaze to the other models. I smiled and then laughed awkwardly. Did I scare them or what?

“I’m sorry about that. I just hate it when models are being unprofessional. I mean, this is an important meeting but… anyway, let’s move on.”

I started and then I told them what they have to do, like meeting my assistant to take note all their statistics for them to have perfect fit clothes. I also told them to at least take a diet, not that diet where they need to lose weight, but the diet where they need eat proper food for them not to gain extra fats. I dismissed them all as soon as I am done with all the talking.

“I’m sorry we’re late.”

I turned to face the speaker but then my tongue backs out as soon as I see the owner of the voice. I guess I get paralyzed. And it seemed like he wasn’t surprised seeing me in front of him. Then why me? I regain my posture and then looked at two. My eyes crawled down and then I notice they were holding each other’s hand. I felt a cringed inside my chest. What now heart? Do you still have feelings for this guy? Can’t you see that he looks like… he moves on?

“I am not pleased with the both of you. If you still want to… participate, please don’t be late next time.”

I started. I don’t think I can face him now. I let out a sigh and then called one of the models that still in the back stage.

“Tell them what I have said a while ago. I need to go.”

I turned to face the two and smiled.

“Listen to her carefully. Bye!”

I turned around and started walking away. Why am I affected? It’s been nine years, why does it look like I still like him? I turned to the corner and then walk ‘till I reach the lift. I waited for it to arrive to the floor I am in. Lu Han, of all the places in Korea why in my work place? So, he became model. He changed a lot, in a good way though. I mean his looks. He became more handsome than he already was before. It’s not surprising that he already has a girlfriend. As soon as those thoughts pop into my head, I felt my heart ache for a little… or so much. I rode the elevator and when I reach the parking lot, I quickly get in the car and drove off. Life is full of surprises, really.

***

“Do it again. Please, make it perfect this time. The show will be tomorrow, please cooperate.”

I said quite exhausted. We’ve been practicing the ramp and I am not satisfied on what I am seeing. I mean, this is not the way I imagine them to deliver my designs. I sighed and then shouted to do it again until they make it perfect.

“Water?”

“Thank you, oppa!”

“Don’t shout too much, your throat.”

I smiled glancing to my closest friend. Ha Ji Won, he’s a Korean but grew up in New York. We met in the school’s library and since then we became friends. We first started teaching each other with the lessons we didn’t fully understand and turns into exchanging of numbers until we became closer. But no more issue, he’s gay but looks like a boy in the way he talks, walks, acts and even his fashion sense. He’s good in designing male and female’s clothes. He was supposed to be in Hawaii now for vacation but decided to come with me. Ji Won and I were like brother and sister, or more like sisters. If you didn’t know him very well, you will think that we are couple because basically he is very clingy.

Patting my shoulder, he pulled me close to him and then patted my head.

“Ya! Don’t ruin my hair.”

He laughed and then nodded. He looked back to the stage and then watches how the models walk. I return my gaze to them as well, checking if they’re doing it right.

“That guy is really good looking.”

“Who? They’re all handsome and pretty.”

“That guy last in line.”

My eyes crawled and spotted the guy he was talking about. I smiled and then shook my head,

“Too bad, he has girlfriend.”

He made an ‘o’ face.

“He’s been looking here for quite a while now. Do you think he likes me?”

“As if he knows you’re a girl.”

“So you think he’s looking at you?”

“I knew him, okay?”

I countered. He smirked but I ignore it knowing him very well. He will just tease me even more when I tried to defend myself. I clapped my hands signaling them to start over again. They went back to the backstage. Suddenly, I felt how Ji Won circled his hands around me from the back. After that, he rested his chin on my shoulder. I laughed,

“You’re tired? I told you this will take too long. You can go back to the hotel now.”

“No, I am just trying to confirm one thing.”

“What is it?”

“You’ll see.”

I puffed my cheeks and then averted my eyes back to the models. They doing it right this time, I ease a little feeling relieved. All the minor models are now done with their turn and its Lu Han and Lee Hi’s turn to have the stage all to their stage. They are going to wear my latest designs. Ji Won on the other hand pulled me closer to him. He’s being extra clingy today.

Lee Hi appeared and then walk elegantly in the stage. Perfect, just perfect! Even though I kind of don’t like her because of being late on the first day, I can say that she’s the perfect model for my dress. Her face, hair length and her body were perfect and so into my designs.

“Take your time, don’t rush yourself you’re the main attraction.”

She then walks a little slower this time. Just perfect.

“Beautiful, isn’t she?”

I blurted. I felt Ji Won nodded agreeing to me. I smiled and then Lu Han came out, his perfect body, baby face, and kind of messy hair. He’s breath taking, so breath taking.

“Gosh, he’s perfect.”

I smiled agreeing to him. Too bad, he’s taken already. He always made me so nervous that I can’t even hold his hand. He glanced to our location and I gasp for air. His eyes were piercing but it was just perfect. He made it hard to breathe. He made me feel so weak but I need to cover up. I don’t want him to think that I am still not over with him, even though that’s true. After working with him for the past few days, I conclude that my feelings for him didn’t fade away. I didn’t stop loving him, it’s just that… I put it aside.

He turned and then walks back to the backstage. Ji Won freed me,

“I’m going back to the hotel now. See you there! Good luck to you, baby!”

He shouted. I laughed but nodded as well. His silhouette disappears just when all the models made their way in the stage.

“Perfect! That’s all for today, good luck to all of us. You all can go now.”

I finished and then walk away as well. I walk around the hall to check all the maintenance and such. Chairs, carpets, decorations, and everything that needed for tomorrow, I’ve check it all to make sure that there will be no problem for tomorrow. I went backstage meeting few of the models. I cheered them good luck and made my way to the fitting room.

“Ops, I’m sorry.”

I blurted turning around when I found Lu Han and Lee Hi hugging each other. The pain is here again, just inside my chest. Don’t be jealous. Stupid Luhan! Did you forget that I was still here? Did you forget that this is a fitting room and not a motel? Why we went wrong? Oh, I forgot, it’s my fault anyway from leaving him behind. I guess this is where we have to stand, I really understand it now. We are really not meant for each other. I am not born to be with you. Have you really forgotten about me? About what we feel inside before? Was that really in the past now? No more?

“I just need my bag, excuse me.”

I said and then turn around to see them already apart. I walk past them and then took my bag and walk away… broken hearted. I won’t deny that I was hoping that he might still have feelings for me, but I know it now. I fully understand that it was just a big dream of mine. For goodness sake, it was Lu Han for crying out loud. He can’t really like a girl like me for that long. Nine long years without communication, it’s impossible.

I walked past them and then open the door, slowly closing it behind me. I felt so weak and then tears starts to run down. This is stupid. It’s just not fair or that’s what I thought? Suddenly, I felt myself being slammed to the wall. I cringed as I felt the pain against my back. I open my eyes and met a furious one.

“Kwon Jae Ha.”

He muttered and then I felt how his lips brush onto mine. Eyes widening, heart racing, hands trembling, knees weakling. He cupped my face and pulled me close to him. What exactly is happening? My hands weakly landed on his shoulder and push him away, but he didn’t budge even a little, not even a single step backward. Gasping for air, I can barely breathe. I tried pushing him away but it seemed like he doesn’t have any intention of letting go of me.

“I-I… I c-can’t—b-b-breathe…”

He pulled away, just inches away from me. I gasped for air and tried to inhale fast. Just when my breathing became stable, I felt his lips against mine for the second time of the day.

“Ya! L-Lu H-Han! Lu Han!”

I shouted shoving him away. I abruptly wiped my lips. What’s on his mind?

“What the ? Are you out of your mind?”

He looked at me fiercely that I almost find myself being scared.

“Why? YOU TOLD ME YOU LOVE ME!”

He shouted back.

“W-what are you talking about?”

“Nine years ago, you love me. You changed a lot. Was your love for me also change? Or does it stay the same?”

My tongue backs out.

“I needed to go, just like you. You have to rest for tomorrow. I’m sorry.”

I said and then started walking just to find myself being yanked back. Why was he saying these? He has girlfriend now. It’s not like he cares.

“Look, I don’t want to bother you and your relationship anymore. Whatever I said nine years ago, let’s leave it there.”

I said stunning him from his location. I took it as a sign that he lets me go. It hurts but this is where we stand… away from each other.

***

“Congratulations, baby!”

Hours had passed after the ramp ended. I’ve been busy answering media’s questions and receiving congratulatory wishes from all the visitors. And when I finally get myself out of the crowd, Ji Won immediately took the chance to congratulate me as well.

“Thank you, honey!”

I said riding his sweet callings. He laughed and then hugged me tight.

“Ms. Kwon, can you help us with something?”

I pulled away from the hug and then face Lee Hi.

“What is it?”

She motioned me to follow her, so I excused myself to Ji Won. He just nodded and then roams the place. I followed Lee Hi and find that we are walking back to the fitting room. We entered the room just to find Lu Han struggling with his tops.

“What is it?”

I asked turning my glance to Lee Hi.

“He needs some help.”

She said and then walks away, leaving the two of us alone. She wasn’t afraid leaving her boyfriend alone with a girl? Maybe she just trusts him so much.

“What help do you need?”

“This.”

I walked over him.

“Why don’t you just ask the staffs—“

“They’re all busy.”

I sighed and then pulled him by the collar and then fix his clothes. Tying his tie and adjusting all that needed to be adjusted.

“Why wearing complicated clothes, anyway?”

“Just to do this.”

And then his hands wrapped securely around my waist.

“Yah!”

I shouted pushing him away. He let go of me and then smirked. That y smirk, oh my gosh!

“You’re crazy.”

“Crazy about you.”

I sighed and then walk towards the door just to find it locked. What the ? I knocked on the door but no one is opening it. I started banging the door loudly but still no response at all.

“Ya! Do something!”

I said looking back to Lu Han and he just shrug. I guess, I have to do it with myself. I walk four steps away from the door.

“Ya! Ya! What are you trying to do? Are you crazy?”

He said pulling me against to his chest as I tried to open the door using my body. What should I do? He doesn’t have any intention of helping me anyway. I shook my body to free myself but he just hugs me tight.

“Listen to me, please.”

“Don’t you know you’re cheating with your girlfriend?”

“What? Girlfriend?”

“Lee Hi. She’s your girlfriend, right?”

My chest tightened.

“I am not. I am single, for goodness sake. I’ve been waiting for you the entire time.”

I turned around from his embrace and looked at him.

“What? Then why—“

“She’s the one who locked us here. Actually, I told her to lock the door.”

“What?”

“Because you don’t have any intention of talking to me, so I did this.”

He said kissing my forehead. I am slowly melting against him. Someone please help me.

“She’s my cousin, just so you know.”

“So you’re hugging her—“

“Because I need comfort. You’ve been so sweet with your… b-boyfriend.”

“Boyfriend?”

I asked. I didn’t remember bringing boyfriend here in Korea and besides I am single as well.

“Mr. Ha Ji Won.”

I laughed after hearing the name he mentioned.

“What? Boyfriend? Are you crazy? He’s a she.”

He smirked and then pulled me close to him, if that’s even possible.

“I still love you, Jae Ha. Are you?”

My heart starts to race to its fastest. I am tight lipped, so nervous and overwhelm. For real?

“For real?”

He nodded.

“I’ve been waiting for you all these years.”

I smiled.

“Really?”

“Really.”

“For real?”

“For real.”

I smiled.

“Serios—“

“Oh shut up.”

And then I felt his lips against mine for a steady kiss. I smiled and then wrapped my hands around his neck pulling him done since he’s taller than me. Considering that I still need to pull him down when I am already standing with my tip toe.  I pulled away and smile,

“I love you too.”

“But I love you more.”

He announced pulling me for another kiss but this time, it was passionate.

Errors? Please ignore it. Too lazy to check.

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