Chapter 47 

 

N hasn't been this nervous since he first came to school in kindergarten. It was as if it's a whole new world he had entered. It was as if time was being repeated again. He felt his stomach turn. It was quite new to him that he was going to a university and he's not wearing this specific uniform. He was wearing a clothing of his choice. It was freeing, yet it felt quite new too.

Like a small child dumbfounded greatly by the large city, he helplessly linked his arms tight on Leo's, who was casually walking around the new campus. "Hakyeon," Leo breathes out before he eyes the tanned latter. "If you continue acting like this, people will actually think you're gay."

"But I am gay." N blinked. "Doesn't gay mean 'happy'?"

"Not that kind of gay, the ual gay, I mean." 

"I suppose no one would think that!" N bargained. "Besides, why would they?"

With no words, he pointed at their linked arms and on how close they were. Heck, they even beat couples displaying their public affection in the campus. For two close friends, they do act like one adorable couple. And some people who actually are fans of boy-love would squeal upon seeing such sight. Too bad they're straight.

"We're in separate classes this time, huh?" N frowned as he took a glimpse on his schedule. "I won't be in the same class with you anymore! What do I do?" he began to whine childishly.

"That's good for me." Leo teased, shooting a playful look at N before he averts away. "That way, no one would annoy me anymore."

Again, N began to stomp his feet and pout in annoyance, only to receive a flick from the silent male. "I'm kidding. Sure, you're annoying but not having you around would be increasingly different. I'm sure you'll do well in your class, anyway. It's a foundation of your future so just bear with it, alright?"

"Alright." N sighs in defeat. As the two took baby steps towards the new university campus, N was suddenly hit by a small, reflexive thought. "How do you think the others are doing, hm, Leo?"

"They should be fine." Leo assured. "They're not kids, you know."

N smiled as he walked arm-in-arm with Leo. He recalled the call he made with Ken not long ago, two days before N and Leo started classes in their college university. He could clearly remember on how Ken sounded so nervous and excited at the same time. He is going to this new school to pursue his college dreams within a week later than the two of them. And right after he finishes college, he can finally fulfill his dreams. After a few  reassuring words, Ken eventually calms down and sooner or later, they decide to end the call there.

He also recalled Kris, Luhan and Xiumin. He could remember that before, Kris and Luhan shared the same problem and that was whether they should return to their home country to continue college or not. Eventually, the two decides to stay in South Korea to study. Besides, they've been too attached in the country greatly. Their friends are here, memories and they even have a "family" here– a family of friends, that is. Kris went in one prestigious university, and so did Luhan and Xiumin. Were they in one university? No. They had their own separate ways in their new college road, thus, eventually parting. As what he had heard from the Chinese Canadian, he was quite assured that three still has communications and were going to do well.

And the same thing goes for them. They went all through those years and here they were.

How were the juniors perhaps? Oh wait, they're not juniors anymore. Seniors.

"I don't want to go to school yet!" Sanghyuk flailed his arms childishly as Jungeun forcibly dragged him behind.Jungeun could only groan as she continued pulling her twin to school. Maybe summer really hit him hard that he still has one of those post vacation laziness or whatever they called it. "I want to be at home, Jungeun! Let me grow fat!"

"No way am I letting that happen, hyung." Jungeun growled before she glares at her brother. "Come on, another school year won't hurt now, would it?"

"How are you so sure that I won't flip during History Class and just die?!"

"That surely won't happen." Jungeun sighs. "I hope this year will be different. Start it off with us not being classmates for a change, like, come on. For my whole studying existence, we never parted in class!"

Taken by surprise, Sanghyuk lets out a gasp that showed his disbelief on what Jungeun had just said. She never, even ever, thought of being separated from him. Seeing that, Jungeun lets out a teasing smirk before ruffling her brother's perfectly styled hair. Upon seeing her brother's sad eyes from what she had just said, she chuckles under her breath. "You know I'm joking, right?" she asks with a small smile forming, which Sanghyuk fake sobs to. 

"Come on, crybaby." she snickers as she links arms with her brother. "Whatever year we have this time and even if we don't get the chance to be classmates again, we're gonna face this year together, sounds good?"

"... M-mhm." 

"Good. Now please, don't resort to fake sobbing or I'm literally leaving you here."

"Well, what do you know. The four of us are classmates." 

Right after seeing the class lists, Jungeun was sure she saw her name in the same class Sanghyuk is. And this said class is the same class Hongbin and Ravi are in too. Talk about one troublesome year right? 

But now that she's thought of it, it would definitely be a better thing compared to having N around her almost every single second. To recall, Ravi wouldn't bother her since, according to the stories she had heard from Hongbin and the rest of VIXX, Ravi would only spend the rest of the day sleeping at the back. Hongbin's too much of an angel to even bother her during class hours or even outside the classroom since well, he would be the most sane to think that annoyance is something no one would want, right? Sanghyuk? Well, she already got used to her brother for eighteen years, so why can't she inside the classroom? Not like he's a threat or anything though.

Classes started like any other year. Perhaps its the tension that this would be their last year as highschoolers, it felt somewhat "new". It felt as if a sudden wave of maturity hit them in one nanosecond. The feeling and responsibility of carrying the title of "seniors" were something Jungeun could consider as "heavy" and "burdensome". 

As per usual, her main goal is to achieve the valedictorian title. Simply that and nothing more or less. This time, she really isn't going to let anything slip in.

Lunch break came and without the presence of a rather loud N, a hyper Ken and a dead-silent Leo, things were just not the same for some reason. All together, mostly with Sanghyuk's lead, they took their lunch on the very same spot– the very same benches  they used to watch Leo practice. The tree that gave them shade actually grew a lot bigger, thus giving a bigger shade for them. They did enjoy a few chats about this and that.

They recalled their happy summer moments. They recalled on how loud Ravi snored. They recalled on how Ravi literally carried Hongbin when they were chased by a street dog out of the blue. Like literally, Ravi didn't even ask Hongbin and in one sweet, the dimpled latter was being carried in a freaking bridal style as they ran away. 

Oh, and that one time too when they tried to scare Sanghyuk right after the Han twins returned later from a small walk together. It was still that time when they were in Sokcho and yes, all of them miserably failed. Neither Sanghyuk nor Jungeun screamed nor even jolted. 

Yeah, good old times.

"Oh! Reminds me." Hongbin smiled as he leaned on Ravi as he eyed Jungeun. "Have you moved on from that totally out of this world romantic presentation of Lay?" he asks before Jungeun was sent in a vigorous coughing spree. Worried and rather surprised, Sanghyuk begins patting his sister until she seizes from coughing. "What? Did I say anything wrong?"

"You bringing that topic alone is wrong." Jungeun glared. "And we agreed to never speak of it again, didn't we?"

"Oh, but it's too adorable not to remember!" Hongbin countered. "The effort Lay gave was definitely a blast."

"Okay, hold up. We're in school now." Jungeun explains once more. "I wouldn't want anyone to know that I'm being courted by a dimpled Chinese guy from a prestigious school. More or less, in typical females' eyes, he'd be considered attractive and the fact alone that he's hitting on the former Ice Princess, which is me, would be the root of jealousy once more."

"But real talk though, does he have a chance?" Ravi interrupts, only to make Jungeun choke on her spit once more. 

"Let's not talk about it here or anywhere else, okay?" the female leered before she continues to have her lunch. Definitely, she was thankful that N was already graduated because if he isn't, surely this hectic day could seriously be worse! The day went on, them chatting about nonsense stuff like always made them see the elapsing time to be slower than typical days.

Once lunch break was over, everyone returned back to their own classes and boredom strikes once more. 

And like the stories she had once heard on how Ravi would simply sleep in the back as the boring lectures went on. Hongbin is indeed one of the best students, not academically, but because of his angelic persona. He radiated a bright and cheery vibe which Jungeun didn't actually see as something to be called "bother". She liked Hongbin and didn't see him as a rival, knowing that Hongbin wouldn't really ace in academics like her. Hongbin sat there, quiet and listening carefully. Sanghyuk? Struggling to understand everything like usual.

Just like that, the school year starts once more.

"Jungeun!" 

The sweet and familiar voice of Lay rings in Jungeun's ears. Behind the Chinese man were Chen and Tao. Casually, they waved their hands to greet the four. Indeed, the absence of the seniors changed the atmosphere they have. It was something off without the constant cries of N and all. It was slightly... new.

But definitely not when it comes to Lay still courting Jungeun. Yet again, a rose stalk was given to her. Jungeun actually lost count on how many rose stalks are back there in their apartment. Thank goodness she has this brother of hers that actually has a green thumb. It was all because of Sanghyuk that all roses and flowers offered by Lay are still living. She never really got tired of them since, well, who doesn't love roses? 

All together, the group walks down Seoul, still coping up with the absence of their seniors. This time, they're seniors themselves. Nothing really changed, except for the fact that, well, they are going to graduate this time. Just one more year and they're going to take their first official step in the real world– college.

But she can agree with the thoughts running wild in their heads. They aren't really complete without the noisy and playful seniors. As they strolled down the same streets they used to walk in as a large group of thirteen, they couldn't deny the fact that they were kind of missing N's clingy and childish attitude. They missed the scenes were he'd try to make Leo open up more and to talk more by acting like a homoual to him. They missed Ken, who would be N's human shield from a pissed Leo. The also missed Kris, who has this weird habit of talking in foreign languages when he's in a state of mental breakdown. But more than that, they missed Kris, who looked helpless seeing his childhood friends, N and Leo, act like a gay couple... well, only N was acting gay and he did pity Leo. Luhan always stood as a sane senior to them, along with Xiumin, but at some points, they'd act a bit childish once in a while. 

Jungeun recalled on how annoyed she was upon learning the fact that Luhan and Xiumin were given baby faces despite their age. And definitely, their personalities didn't jive with their age neither.

She and the others missed it.

"I wonder how Kris-gege is." Tao frowned as he walked alongside Chen. "He didn't go to Canada, right?"

"As far as I've heard, he didn't." Chen smiled to assure the taller male. "He's still in Korea... but I'm quite unsure on which university he went to."

"Must be one of the big college universities." Lay giggled angelically, showing those darn dimples once again. Ah, Jungeun was slowly getting fond of Lay's dimples. "Well, he is smart enough to be in those, so surely, he chose one great university."

"N-hyung and Leo-hyung are in the same university, right?" Chen asks as he eyes Hongbin and Sanghyuk. Once he was answered by a nod, he smiles slightly before shaking his head. "Will something even separate those two? I seriously think N-hyung's gay for Leo-hyung."

"He's not, idiot." Ravi countered. "For your information, he was crazy once for Hongbin's friend."

"Wait, he was?" Hongbin blinked. "Who?"

"Seohyun-noona, remember?" Ravi clicked his tongue. "Remember when you introduced her to them? Yeah, he never stopped talking about Seohyun-noona since then. He did stop spazzing of her, but now, as far as I've heard, he did have a crush on this girl named... uh, what was her name again?"

"Eunyoung?" Sanghyuk asks, surprising Jungeun. Eunyoung is a great friend of the twins. They've been quite close when they were in Middle School. She was extremely close to Sanghyuk and they actually became the closest friend. She tried befriending Jungeun before, and yes, they were quite close, since that time, Eunyoung was really close to boys. Jungeun was still a "guy" back then, still unaware of her real identity. Eunyoung went in the same school they are in when she was in first year High School but transferred when last year to another school. N knew about her, and Eunyoung as well. N had a small crush on her and Eunyoung shared the similar interest toward N. Alas, the transferring of schools was a hinder, thus, ending N's feelings towards the female.

"Yeah, Eunyoung." Ravi nodded before sighing. "They were such a good match though."

"He liked a lady?" Tao snickered sarcastically. "Well, that's new."

"Tell me about it." Jungeun smiled faintly. "But I wouldn't judge him, Eunyoung is a petite lassie! Anyone can fall in love with her."

"Even you?" the Chinese teased, only to earn a rather deadly glare from the female. "Okay, I get it, she can't turn ladies into lesbians. Alright, I'm sorry for asking. Geez."

As they continued to walk the same streets, everyone continued to talk about the former seniors. They recalled a few funny moments those seniors did. Before, N really has this weird habit of conveying his affection towards his dear friend, Leo. Because of so, they actually recalled and saw how N dressed up as a lady and strolled Seoul around with Leo. The scary part of that is that N actually looked like a real lady and they were fitting for a cute couple! Leo didn't seem awkward actually, so they really had a hard time convincing themselves that the person he's linking arms with is a male called N. 

Or maybe that moment when Ken judged Jungeun's strength. They were once in Ken's home, his parents and brother absent as per usual. With that on mind, Jungeun actually got ticked off and asked Ken if she could prove that she is extremely strong for a lady. Ken agrees and soon enough, she got one strong kick from Jungeun, which eventually sends him limping towards his room. It took about twenty minutes for them to make Ken stop sobbing like a boy grounded by his mom. 

Back then, Kris never really liked spicy things. Luhan decided to toy with this fact and prepared the spiciest dish he knew. Oh, that time was really something. It took a few seconds before they got the most hilarious reaction from the Chinese-Canadian. He was literally yelling for water. 

Luhan was actually mistaken as a lady when they were walking around with Kris. He actually got cat-called by a group of male strangers along the way. Luhan was actually asking Jungeun for a total of solid one hour if it was a curse that he was born with a feminine face. Aside from that, he was actually asking her if his his organ down there is real or if that was just attached willy-nilly by his parents.

Xiumin? Probably, he's the one and only that actually had zero embarrassing moments they can recall.

The night slowly fell and the group slowly thought of going home at last. Jungeun, Sanghyuk and Lay were taking the same route. Unfortunately, Sanghyuk recalled the fact that they have nothing to prepare for dinner, thus, telling Jungeun that he'll have a quick shopping spree at the grocery by himself. As for his twin, he successfully asked Lay to accompany her back home. Lay agreed rather easily, thus, having the twins part ways.

"You were always close with the seniors, weren't you?" Jungeun asks Lay as they walked back to the Han twins' apartment. Lay simply shot a rather surprised look at the female before smiling and nodding. 

"Why'd you ask?"

"Well, you must really miss them, huh? I mean, I've heard that you are close to Luhan. And to Kris and Xiumin too." Jungeun explained. "They're in those universities far from us, right?"

"Well, yes." Lay nodded.

"Where are you planning to go on college, huh?" the female questioned as she eyed the Chinese beside her. "Perhaps you're going to fly back to China with your grandmother? Besides, that's your home country."

"Flying back to China for college might be considered." Lay agreed as he nodded. "It actually depends. Well, I only came here to Korea to pursue an excellent education up until I could. And now that I'm nearly finishing High school, maybe grandma might consider us going home to China."

"I see."

"How about you?" 

"Depends. Hyung and I only care of entering a university where we can be together. Besides, he's too childish to be independent so he'll need me almost every time. If we find a good university here, then we stay here in Korea. If not, we might consider going abroad."

"Will your mother be okay with that?"

"Definitely. She and dad only care what's best for us. I suppose that'll be fine too."

Lay nodded as he continued to walk beside Jungeun. "If that's the fact, then do expect me missing you." he mumbled cutely, only to gain a rather scowling expression from the female. "What? Won't you miss me if I were to fly back to China?"

"... Of course I would." Jungeun replied in a softer way, just to get a rather successful smile from the dimpled latter. "So you better update me as far as you can! Or I'm going to fly to China and check for myself!"

"I'll do that." he nodded happily as he looked around. "Hey, remember that time back then?"

"There were lots of moments we walked this street together. Start being more specific." Jungeun hissed.

Lay smiled, despite sensing the familiar dangerous aura around Jungeun. "When we weren't that close yet. When you nearly got ran over by those passing cars. The main reason being you too stubborn to listen to me."

A guilty smile crosses Jungeun's face instantly as she recalled her immature ways. "Yeah, I recall those times. Again, I'm sorry–"

"I actually felt proud of myself, not to brag or anything." Lay giggled, only to earn a confused look from Jungeun. 

"Why so?"

"I felt like a man."

"Why? Aren't you a man already?"

"No, no. I meant... well, I was able to protect a beautiful lady like that."

Jungeun felt a blush spread across her cheeks as she eyed the dimpled Chinese. She felt her heart skip a few beats as she walked alongside Lay, reminiscing those times she nearly got a face-to-face moment with those near death situations. All she could think was fear back then. But Lay was there, patting her back and trying to calm her down. She recalled how Lay got wounded once when he saved her. She felt thankful and guilty at the same time.

"Again, I'm thanks for that." Jungeun smiled as she unconsicously scooted near Lay. Lay was sure that he saw the female secretly smiling to herself, bringing him to a realization that maybe, just maybe, she recalled those scenes where he was hugging her tightly, in a protective manner, that is. 

"For what?" Lay asked, playing innocent.

"For being man enough to do that." the female answered softly. "For saving me and putting up with such immature actions back then."

Only a small smile crossed Lay, making his adorable dimples show up again. The way Jungeun was slowly opening up to, not only him, but the rest, only proved that she was slowly putting her trust on them. She is slowly becoming a lady they are trying to make out of her. Bit by bit. 

And not wanting herself to get herself in trouble once more, she sought for safety and without her knowing, her arms found their way around Lay's. She linked her arms on Lay's, scooting herself nearer to the Chinese. Another shy smile crossed Lay as he allowed the female to link her arm around his. He felt a wave of appreciation from the female. The way she appears so tough when in reality she's simply a typical lady with fears, a lady with insecurities and a lady with flaws.

As for Jungeun, she began to appreciate Lay. He had the charms, but her ice-cold heart was preventing her to see those all these time. 

Maybe now, now that she's slowly being able to see the truth, she could at least be open to them as well, right?

Besides, if she were to have an ideal type, definitely, it'll be Lay.

"You better not go anywhere having passing cars nearly run you over." Lay reminded, only to make Jungeun nod as she scooted close. 

Maybe, Lay deserved an answer after all those things as soon as possible.