You

Yoseob talked with Kikwang on the phone as he hurried through the park, his arms burning from carrying the hot bags of food. Kikwang had fallen ill and Yoseob had offered to bring him soup, but Kikwang, who was always picky with what he put into his body, had then texted Yoseob a list of particular foods to buy, turning Yoseob’s charity into quite the chore.

With his phone squished between his shoulder and his ear, Yoseob yelled, “Yah, Kikwang-ah! I said I’m coming right now!” He balanced the take-out bags in one hand now so that he could grab the phone with his other hand and end the call. “Aish, that impatient hyung,” he mumbled, as he pocketed his phone and quickened his pace through the park. Even though Yoseob was two months older than Kikwang, Yoseob tended to call him hyung partly out of respect but mostly because he always felt younger than Kikwang. He didn’t mind feeling younger. In a way, he kind of wished he was the maknae instead of Dong Woon. He was certainly cute enough for the role.

As he walked the curved path that cut through the green grass and magenta flowers, he saw a young girl sitting on the bench just up the way with her head in her hands, her back hunched as she quietly sobbed. He slowed his pace as he passed by her, not sure if he should stop to see what was wrong. Thinking about the hot food in his hands, which would surely get cold if he stopped, he almost continued on, but something about the girl drew him in and he found himself walking back to the bench.

“Ai, you okay?” he asked.

The girl slowly lifted her face from her hands and looked up at Yoseob.

Yoseob swallowed hard. She was beautiful. She had such pale skin and long dark hair and eyes that, even though glassy with tears, appeared brighter than the day itself. As he always did when he was nervous, he began to act in somewhat of a swaggering manner, putting on a cool arrogant face in light of his insecurities. “Yah, I’m Yoseob from Beast. You recognize me?”

The girl, still with teary eyes, her face blank, sat up, her hands falling to her lap as she continued to look at him. She was confused by this boy who had suddenly appeared in front of her, asking if she recognized him. She had no idea who he was.

“You know Fiction?” he asked. Without giving her a chance to answer, he sang, “Fiction in fiction in fiction… know that one?” When she still didn’t answer, he sang the beginning of Shock. “Every day I just can’t control, every night the loneliness my love. What about that one? You like my songs?”

“Wha– I’m not sure…” She didn’t know what she was supposed to say. “Why are you singing?” she quietly asked.

Yoseob looked at her curiously. “To cheer you up, of course,” he said.

“Oh,” she said, looking back down at her lap.

Yoseob was disappointed that she still seemed sad. He didn’t like when people were depressed and always felt like it was his duty to cheer them up. He didn’t know that this girl before him was somewhat of the same type, having spent most of her life cheering up others and now, feeling sad herself, had just realized that she didn’t have anyone in her life to do the same for her.

He had thought for sure that his songs would’ve cheered her up, but she didn’t seem to be a fan. In a way, he was kind of happy about that. He was already thinking about a possible future with this girl, thinking that she might be his first true love, but that wouldn’t be possible if she was a fan. Fans had a distorted perception of who he really was. They loved him without even really knowing him. If he was going to enter into a relationship, it had to be with someone who was just meeting him as he was just meeting her, with no preconceived notions about the other. He knew he was getting ahead of himself, already thinking about a relationship with this girl he had met only seconds earlier, but he couldn’t help it. He had been instantly attracted to her.

Because his songs failed to cheer her up, he offered her the only other thing he had – Kikwang’s food. “Hungry?” he asked. Again, he didn’t wait for her to answer. Instead, he sat beside her, placing the bags of food on the bench between them and already sorting through the hot trays inside.

“I don’t think I can eat,” she said, glancing away from the trays. She had been secretly wishing that someone would come and make her smile, but now that this strange boy was sitting beside her, she felt uncomfortable from the attention.

“What? Food is daebak! I can eat so much, you have no idea. I used to sneak away from my hyungs and eat ramen every night just because… well, it wasn’t like I was really that hungry at night. It was just comfort. Food is good.” He continued to babble away as he pulled the trays from the bag, revealing each dish to her, none of which were on Kikwang’s list. He had decided, after reading Kikwang’s demanding text, to buy all unhealthy food instead just to spite his hyung, including some fried seafood that he knew Kikwang couldn’t eat because of his allergies. He opened that tray of fried seafood now and offered the girl a pair of chopsticks. “Go ahead,” he said, pushing the tray toward her.

She hesitatingly accepted, if only to appease him. Taking food from and eating with strangers was not something to which she was accustomed. She had never even talked with a boy she hadn’t known through school or through her family. This entire experience was quite odd. But the boy was right. Food was comfort. The moment that seafood touched her tongue, she felt instantly warm inside. “My name’s Hanna,” she said, after swallowing a spicy mouthful. “Thank you… for this.”

Yoseob smiled and shrugged as she began eating from another tray, slurping up some noodles. “I don’t usually do this,” he quietly said, his mouth full.

“Me neither!” she said. “I mean, just… eating like this with someone…”

“… who you just met,” he said, finishing her sentence.

Hanna nodded. “Right,” she said, smiling.

Yoseob swallowed his mouthful of noodles and looked over at her. “Why were you crying?” When he saw her look away then, he added, “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to–”

“My father and I used to sit here,” she said, looking at Yoseob now. “We used to sit here each Saturday and talk about our week. He was always so sad and I was the only person who listened to him. Now that I think about, we never actually talked about my week, just his. But that was okay. I don’t know…” She patted with a napkin and closed the tray of food she had been eating from, setting it down beside her on the bench. “He passed away a few days ago.”

“Oh?”

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have just blurted that out like that,” she said, averting her eyes from him again.

“No, it’s okay,” he said. “You probably needed to say it. You… you don’t have anyone to talk to?”

Hanna’s eyes began to well with tears again. She looked over at Yoseob beside her, feeling such a strange connection to him in that moment. “He was all I had,” she said, her voice shaky. “Now I’m all alone.”

Yoseob now set aside his tray, too. He wanted to put his hand to her face to wipe away her tears, but he thought it would be too bold of a gesture. Instead, he said the only thing he could think of. “You’re not alone. I’m here.” He was usually incapable of even staring directly at someone he liked, nevertheless talking so directly. But with Hanna, it was different. He stared directly into her big brown eyes, imagining an entire life with her. “I’ll be here every Saturday if you want,” he added.

“You don’t have to do that,” she quietly said, shaking her head. “I don’t want you to pity me.”

“I’m not offering out of pity.” Blushing, he said, “I honestly want to see you again.”

Each Saturday for the next month, Yoseob met Hanna at that very bench where they’d talk about their week. He’d gossip about his groupmates and share with her some songs he’d been working on, but more importantly, he’d listen to what she had to say about her week and be that sounding board that she never had before. They quickly grew close but with each Saturday that passed, Yoseob felt like his chance at making something more of their relationship was dwindling. He didn’t want her to only think of him as a friend. He wanted her to see him romantically and to know of his deeper feelings for her.

On the fifth Saturday they were to meet, Yoseob texted her to say he would be late. The text was filled with cheesy emoticons, which made Hanna laugh.

Hanna was already at the bench when she received the text. She looked around the park now, feeling kind of uncomfortable sitting there by herself. Down the path a ways, she saw a young man approaching. Yoseob had shown her pictures of his groupmates and she was sure that the person approaching now was Dong Woon, the maknae.

Suddenly, Dong Woon began singing, his voice ringing loud in that park. “I’m going to make you love me,” he sang, staring directly at Hanna. “I love you…”

Hanna covered , confused and embarrassed by his sudden singing.

Dong Woon continued to sing as he walked toward her, stopping just short of the bench. “I’m only happy when you are here. I always just need you.”

At that moment, another young man jumped out into the path from behind a nearby cluster of trees. It was Kikwang, and he erupted into song then, too. “Even though I can’t say it right now, even when I keep getting nervous looking at you, I always think of you. You don’t know yet, you don’t know my love. I just need you…”

From behind that same cluster of trees, Yoseob then emerged, adding a soft moan to the song. “Mmm…” he sang.

Knowing what was happening now but still in shock, Hanna covered her face to hide her tears as she watched Hyun Seung then join the other Beast boys on the path. “I want you like this, I just keep seeing you. In my head, it’s filled with the thoughts of you. I’m so happy all day. I’ll sing a song for you anytime…”

Yoseob, standing in the center of the group, raised his arm toward Hanna’s direction. “I’m going to make you love me. I love you. I’m only happy when you are here. I always just need you.”

Dong Woon and Hyun Seung behind him leant their voices then. “Because of you, you, you, you. I only think of you, you, you, you. Now…”

“Love me, love me,” Yoseob sang, still reaching toward her, as if trying to close the distance between their stance on the path and the bench where she was sitting. “Only look at me.”

Suddenly, Doo Joon sprung up from behind the boys, seemingly appearing out of nowhere as he sang his verse, and then Jun Hyung appeared, too, launching into his rap.

All then stood around Yoseob as he sang the chorus again, emptying out all of his passion into each note. “I’m gonna make you love me. I love you. I’m only happy when you are here. I always just need you.”

“Because of you, you, you, you. I only think of you, you, you, you. Now…” Dong Woon and Hyun Seung sang.

“Love me, love me,” Yoseob sang. “Only look at me.”

But then the boys, all of whom had been standing on the path together, began at once walking toward her.

Kikwang sang, “Slowly I will move closer to you. I will now tell you, gathering up my courage…”

Yoseob then kneeled down on the grass before her, reaching for her hand. “I love you,” he said, no longer singing but confessing.

Yoseob, meanwhile, holding Hanna’s hand now, asked if she, too, loved him.

Hanna let loose her tears as she nodded. “I do,” she said. Smiling widely, she whispered, “You’re crazy.”

Yoseob smiled. “For you,” he said. “Crazy for you.” 

Dong Woon and Hyun Seung began improvising the lyrics then. “Crazy for you, you, you, you,” they sang, joyfully laughing.

Yoseob rose from his knees and helped Hanna up, the two in a near embrace as they stood. Closing his eyes, Yoseob slowly pulled her close and kissed her as the voices around them continued to sing. …you, you, you, you…