Youngbae felt foreign lips pressing against his mouth. They were soft and slightly moving against his own, trying to invade his personal space with force.He didn't move an inch, simply standing there with his eyes wide open as Madleine was kissing him. She had her arms around his neck and pulled him close. 

How could he be so blind?

"I loved you first, okay?"

Years had passed since his first encounter with this bubbly, friendly, French woman and never would he have thought that she would have feelings for him. Madleine's past boyfriends had always been tough and cool men who picked her up from university with their expensive cars. Youngbae had always been the nice guy, the guy who doesn't drink, the guy who arrives early in the morning with his bicycle. Their friendship had been a miracle to the educator - why would someone so lively like Madleine even talk to him? That was a question he had asked himself so often before he eventually ignored it.

Was that his mistake? 

Probably. But then again, she had never given him any signs until now, had she? Maybe. But he hadn't noticed them.

All these thoughts crossed his mind within a few seconds before Youngbae saw something - or someone -  from the corner of his eyes. He knew that there were only three people in this house. Besides himself and the woman who was kissing him, there was ... 

Jiyong. 

He was watching them. 

And that was why suddenly, the pressure on his lips started feeling wrong. Youngbae felt as if he was committing a sin, as if he betrayed, cheated and lied, all at once. His instincts told him to just push her away but he couldn't be so rough with her, not after she had confessed to him while shedding tears. Seeing no other way out of this situation, the educator gripped Madleine's waist and gently moved her away from him, turning his head away from hers in order to emphasize his intentions without being too harsh. 

He was afraid of seeing his friend's hurt and sad face, he was afraid of seeing her wet eyes. But more than that, he was afraid of glancing to another pair of light brown, beautiful orbs that were watching them. Youngbae feared those tears more than anything else in this world.

The educator looked at Madleine first. Her blue eyes reminded him of a sea that was losing droplets of salty water. She looked down on her feet with a dull expression, her arms close against her body, hands balled into small fists. Youngbae felt horrible for having to reject people over and over again. He felt so ed up, the feeling was almost painful. And as if Madleine's sad face wasn't enough, he heard a gasp right then when he wanted to put a hand on her shoulder in order to comfort her. However, that gasp didn't come from her. 

Youngbae pulled his hand away and turned his head towards the brunette. 

"Ji ... Jiyong!"

He wanted to run to him and hug him, wanted to explain to him what had happened just now. Jiyong was standing there, eyes wide and glassy.  Youngbae's legs almost moved on their own when they took a step towards the brunette's direction. He only stopped in his tracks because Madleine's head suddenly moved up, her blue eyes looking back and forth between him and Jiyong once before they fixed themselves on the educator's face. 

"Right, he is the only one crying in this room. Why don't you just go to him? Don't mind me, Youngbae. I am used to getting overlooked by you. Go ahead and comfort him already!"

"Don't say that, M'leine. Please don't make me feel even worse. Just ... don't."

"Oh I am sorry for making you feel so bad, Youngbae! I didn't know that declaring my love to you would make you feel like , really!"

"That's not what makes me feel like "

"What else if not that, huh?", Madleine asked hysterically before pointing a finger at Jiyong, "Is it because he saw us? Have you cheated on your boyfriend? Is it that, huh?"

"No! It's not!" That was a lie. Partly. "What I mean is - "

"Stop it! Just stop it! You keep lying to me! I can't stand it anymore!", the French woman cried.

Upon seeing that, the educator's face softened. "I am sorry. I am so sorry. You never ... I mean, I didn't know you thought of me that way. I had no idea. I am sorry for having been blind all those years."

Madleine smiled a bitter smile. "Does it matter now? It doesn't, right? Even now that you know it, it means nothing to you."

"It does matter to me."

"Not in the way I wanted it to matter to you though.", Madleine said almost in a whisper before making her way out, passing by Jiyong as if he was a standard lamp. She couldn't bear looking at him.

Youngbae ran after her, caught her arm. "M'leine, don't go yet." He didn't want their friendship to end this way, even though he knew it was utterly stupid of him to tell her to stay right now. It was just that he didn't want her to walk out of his life like that. Even if he couldn't return her feelings, she was still his friend. 

Madleine pulled her arm away. "I need some time. Give me at least that. Please.", she pleaded with sad eyes before disappearing. The educator watched her back for a while and sighed. To say that he felt horrible was an understatement. He felt absolutely ed up. And it wasn't even over. It could only become worse now. He was certain. 

Youngbae turned around slowly, his eyes searching for Jiyong. He spotted his protégé immediately. 

"Jiyong.", he breathed softly, approaching the brunette and engulfing him in a hug. "I am sorry that you had to witness this." 

The next moment, something unusual happened. Jiyong wriggled in his educator's strong arms, trying to free himself with force. Once he noticed this, Youngbae let go of him, a surprised look on his face.  "Ji, what - "

"You liar! You stupid, stupid liar!", the brunette yelled.

The educator was taken aback. Why was it that everyone seemed to accuse him of lying these days? "Liar? Jiyong, what are you saying?", the educator asked, not believing his ears.

"I am saying that you are a liar! You don't like me more than Madleine!" 

"What? But that's not true!"

"No it is true!"

"No!"

"It is! I saw it!"

"Jiyongie, please calm down. Look, I will explain everything to you, okay?", Youngbae cooed. He had to remind himself that he was an educator and that he wasn't talking to Madleine right now. He had to keep cool even though Jiyong's word's broke his heart. He tried to grip his shoulders but the younger man didn't let him.

"You let her do that one thing to her!", the brunette said, sniffing, his voice becoming lower and sadder, "But when I wanted that from you today, you didn't do it for me. You don't like me." 

"Jiyong, no! That's a misunderstanding!"

"And you didn't come to hug me first. You only talked to Madleine.", Jiyong said sobbing, letting his tears fall. "You even looked sad when she went away."

"I was sad but that doesn't mean that I didn't notice you or that I don't like you! And the kiss ... It wasn't me that kissed her, she has done it! I swear!"

"No, you are lying.", Jiyong said crying, burrying his face in his palms.

Youngbae tried again and gripped his shoulders. He had broken Jiyong's trust unintentionally and he hated himself even more for that. Oh God,  he thought, what was this? A curse? A curse that made him make people cry?  "I am not lying. I swear, I like you. I like you more than anything!"

"No, you don't!", Jiyong cried and cried and couldn't and wouldn't believe his educator. He felt so weird, so confused, so jealous, those feelings were eating him up alive. The hammering of his heart was there again but it didn't feel like it usually felt. This time, the pain was unbearable. His chest constricted and his breathing got heavy und unsteady.

"Jiyong? Yah, Jiyong, what's wrong?", the educator asked worriedly, fear evident in his voice.

"It ... it hurts!"

"Where does it hurt? Breathe in and out! Ji, do you hear me?", Youngbae started shaking him lightly, checking every inch of his body.

"My chest hurts! It hurts Bae!"

Youngbae starting sweating. Immediately, he pulled off the brunette's hoodie and tossed it in a corner, leaving him in his undershirt. "Breathe Jiyong, breathe in and out, in and out!" The educator mimicked his words, relieved that his protégé was following his instructions. However, it didn't seem to work.

"It hurts, Bae! It hurts!"

Youngbae felt his heart throbbing violently. Think. He had to think! With one swift move, he picked the younger man up, bridal style and walked him to terrace, hoping that some fresh air would manage to calm him down. Then, he laid Jiyong down on a lounger, held his hand and fished his cellphone out of his pocket, dialing Dr. Garnier's number.

Dr. Garnier was Jiyong's family doctor. The Kwons always called him whenever their son was sick because he knew about his special mental state and was a specialist for special cases like Jiyong. Moreover, he carefully observed any kind of developpement and gave advice to the brunette's parents. He had been a big help since day one. If it wasn't for him, the Kwon's had probably been on the verge of giving up. 

When Dr. Garnier had arrived, he had tried to calm Youngbae down and had instructed him to carry Jiyong to his room, so that he could do a small check-up there. Of course the educator had to stay outside.

He paced up and down, up and down, sighing frustatedly, ruffling his hair, wanting to rip it out because he hated himself right now. He was ashamed. The Kwons had trusted him to take care of their one and only son and what had he done? He had made him cry, had made him breathless and sick. On top of that, he had made one of his closest friends shed tears for him that day. Wow, he thought to himself, it seemed like he could only bring pain to people. Youngbae thought that he was an . Simple as that. He was so damn worried. If Dr. Garnier came out and told him that Jiyong was ill, he would never forgive himself. He would - 

The door opened.

"Doctor, how is Jiyong? Is he alright? He is not sick, is he?"

The older man smiled a small and comforting smile, putting his hand on the educator's shoulder. "Relax, Youngbae. Everything is alright."

"Oh God, and I thought ...", Youngbae sighed, being relieved. "But if he is alright, why did he feel pain, doctor? He told me that his chest hurt and he had difficulties with breathing steadily..."

"Youngbae.", Dr. Garnier said and out a hand on his own chest. "What is here?"

The educator lifted one of his brows. "Uhm ... the heart, I suppose."

"That's right. And what does your heart stand for?"

"Life?"

The medic shook his head, patting his chest. "That, too. But first and foremost, it stands for feelings. The heart is the center of all kinds of emotions. No matter what you feel, be it joy, anger or sorrow, it is your heart that defines those feeling for you."

Youngbae nodded understandingly. 

"Jiyong's problem is not his heart. Jiyong's problem lies within his heart. He must have felt an emotion that was too strong for him to handle, an emotion that overwhelmed him in a negative way, one that he couldn't cope with and that led him to a feeling of panic. And panic, is always linked with respiratory problems and a feeling of chest constriction." , the doctor explained. "Something must have aroused the patient."

The educator nodded while listening to the medic. Now it was his chest that was constricting from the guilt that he felt. "I see, doctor. I see."

"It does not concern me what has happened before I arrived. However, I have a feeling that you feel responsible for it."

Youngbae sighed. "I must admit, I do. To be honest, I believe that everything was my fault." 

Dr. Garnier nodded and put his hand on the educator's shoulder again. "Don't be too strict with yourself. Sometimes, people with the best intentions cause pain to others, things like this happen. I am sure that you are not guilty, Youngbae. But let me tell you something about Jiyong."

"Yes? What is it, doctor?"

The medic smiled knowingly. "He is not a complete child after all. In some ways, he can indeed act and react like someone his age. Just open your eyes a bit more Youngbae, and you will see."

Knock. Knock.

"Come in.", a faint voice said.

Youngbae opened the door to Jiyong's bedroom, holding a tray with food in his hands. He put the tray down on the nightstand before taking a seat on the edge of the brunette's bed. "Hey."

The younger man just looked up to his educator without saying anything. He didn't feel angry anymore but kind of exhausted. He couldn't even wave or something.

"How are you feeling?"

"I am okay.", said Jiyong. He couldn't help but blush slightly when the older man put his hand on his forehead, as if checking his fever. 

"Hm, your temperature is normal. How about your chest, does it still hurt?"

Jiyong shook his head, not being able to tear his eyes away from the handsome man who was sitting on his bed. When Youngbae flashed him one of his smiles, he could feel his heart throbbing again. But he didn't tell him of course.

"That's good. Now I am sure if you eat something, you will feel great again.", the educator said and turned towards the tray, pointing at a steaming bowl and a spoon. "I made your favourite soup. Oh, and there is also some rice with sidedishes if you want. You have neither had breakfast nor lunch today so eat a lot, alright?" 

Jiyong didn't say anything and just pulled himself up, resting his back against the headboard so that Youngbae could place the tray on his lap. 

They sat there quietly for a while, the brunette eating his meal while his educator was watching him doing so. It was strange how their morning had started off so cheerfully and now they were sitting there so awkwardly. 

The educator waited patiently until his protégé had finished. "Full? There is some more food in the kitchen, if you want."

"No, thank you."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Alright then.", Youngbae said smiling. He took the tray and put it down on the nighstand again before he turned back to Jiyong. He sat there for a while and just stared at him, lost in his own thoughts and feelings. The way he lay there, hurt and fragile, it broke the older man's heart into thousand pieces. How could he ever make it up to him?

Jiyong adjusted his pillow and lay down on his back, trying to ignore the fact that Youngbae was staring at him the whole time until he suddenly felt a grip on his hand. The brunette turned his head to the side and saw the other man's head coming closer and closer until that handsome face was burried in the crook of his neck. Jiyong blushed furiously when he felt the warm breath on his skin ghosting slowly towards his ear. 

"You scared me today.", Youngbae whispered. "I thought something was going to happen to you."

The brunette had goosebumps from having that heavenly voice so close to his ear. It felt so comforting, relaxing, he couldn't describe it. 

"But do you know what scared me the most? The fact that you thought I wouldn't like you." 

"You don't like me."

Youngbae shifted his mouth, moving across Jiyong's soft cheek without keeping much distance to the skin there. His lips wandered until they reached the brunette's nasal wing. He stopped there and nuzzled his own nose against his before gazing into Jiyong's eyes. "How can I make you believe that I do like you, that I, in fact, like you so, so much?"

Jiyong's face flushed from all the proximity. He didn't know if he had ever seen Youngbae's face up-close like this before. His eyes were small but beautiful and his breath smelled like peppermint. The smell of his aftershave was musky and wonderful ... 

The brunette closed his eyes tightly, not being able to look at Youngbae any longer.

The latter smiled warmly and moved his lips again. He went down, down, down, until he could feel Jiyong's plump lips against his own, lingering there for a few seconds before pulling away. Another smile graced the educator's face when his protégé's eyes suddenly opened again. 

"Was this what you wanted me to do this morning?"

Jiyong only nodded lightly, his head read like a tomato. 

Youngbae smiled warmly and cupped his cheeks. "I am afraid of doing this to you. Because if I do, I feel like doing it more than just once. I want to do it more often and I want it to last longer. But I ... I cannot do that. And that's why I hesitated this morning."

"But why can't you do that, Bae?", Jiyong wanted to know.

The educator his cheeks. "That's too complicated to explain, darling."

A/N: Hello dear readers! Here is Chapter 7! It consists of much dialougue and to be honest, I kind of failed here at some parts! (Must be because I am so tired ._.) I hope you'll still enjoy this! Please tell me if there should be anything you are not satisfied with! 

Thank you so much for your support, guys! <3

Love,

Hatsumomo