03.
Burdensome
Chapter 03
After been told about Chanyeol’s whereabouts and needed materials, Kris immediately ran his foot upstairs. The panic still overtook him and messed his mind which made him decided to ask the lady once again just to make sure; he won’t be wishing to open the wrong door. Just right when he stepped the first step on stairs, he heard this familiar voice calling his name. Kris stepped closer to the source of the voice with uncertainty.
'Chanyeol?' He shot a wild guess.
"Kris... Kris... don't-" The voice whimpered. Well, it was definitely Chanyeol’s and the fact that the voice was crying and whimpering in agony, made Kris couldn’t help but frowning. Then several hiccups and sobs follows. Kris turned his head around and finally spotted something.
'I should've known' Kris noted to himself. The giraffe-y things plastered to the door snapped Kris out of his mind. Taking a deep breath and Kris grabbed the handle. He was just wishing that this was really the boy’s room and no stranger was sleeping behind the door because it would awkward. Slowly, he pulled the handle down feeling caution and giddy in the same time; uh not really a pleasant feeling truthfully. The gap was showing leaving the door at ajar. Kris took a sneak peek from the other side of door and saw Chanyeol sweating and scrunching his nose. Well, in another occasion, this might be endearing but now, uh huh, Kris could feel his heart shattered.
"Hyung, Kris hyung..." Chanyeol cried out. he curled into a fetus whilst covering himself with a blanket. From what it was seen, Chanyeol was having a very eerie nightmare; he was quivering like there’s no tomorrow. it made the younger looked even more fragile and vulnerable. The ball of energy really turned completely into someone Kris couldn’t recognize. Kris stepped inside and closed the door inaudibly. The food stray left behind on the top of night stand table beside Chanyeol’s bed.
"Kris hyung..., Hyung, don't l- leave me" Chanyeol voiced out just to be muffled by the pillow he was clinging onto. The tears still can be seen on his face, pillow is being depended like it was his only life. Kris hurriedly shushed the younger while his wet cheek slowly.
"I'm here, Yeol-la, I'm here..." Kris said reassuringly.
"K- Kris hyung~" Chanyeol' body relaxes a bit when Kris uninterruptedly his chubby cheek while muttering 'shush' once in awhile.
Reassuring the crying boy was a hard time, to say the least, but it was completely worth it. Chanyeol finally got his normal pace of breathing back and his hand was now clinging to Kris’s one instead. Kris was now having the boy snuggling while still letting out several whimpers.
Kris swept Chanyeol tears from the latter cheek slowly then planted kisses to the temple of Chanyeol's forehead. Chanyeol was wearing baggy shirt and pants, ‘cute.’ the elder noted while smiling. Kris sweeped his sight around and only to found wet tissues scattered practically all over the room; you really didn’t wish what kind of ‘liquid’ that wetted the tissues- Kris was taking a wild guess that Chanyeol threw it recklessly. The hiccups attracted the elder’s attention once again. He could barely noticed the swollen eyes by now. The sight was like screaming to be hugged and Kris couldn’t be more agree than that but he wasn’t free; his hand was still being clutched by the younger. Kris closed his both eyes to hold the untamed urge inside his soul. God he missed the younger’s scent and warmth.
"Baby, let me go for a moment okay?" He said softly, hoping Chanyeol could understand but still sleeping; didn’t work. He pushed his luck by Chanyeol’s hand and only have it getting tighter. He sighs in hopeless tone.
"Yeol-la... "Kris trailed, still begging Chanyeol to let go. But no word comes from Chanyeol mouth except whimpers and another hiccups. Kris sighed, gave up. So he sat on the edge of the sleeping boy’s bed finding a comfortable position and decided to just wait Chanyeol, which meant he had to hold the urge of hugging, and kissing, and cuddling.
Suddenly, something caught his interest; a book with a big ‘DIARY’ carved on top of the cover. Even though opening and reading it is a act of invading personal space, but Kris couldn’t help it. All the mysteries of Chanyeol's mind and heart really ticked him off. Maybe there were hints like Chanyeol was saying he was a burden and such but still, it didn’t answer everything, and he really sensed something was behind of all this and really wished to fix it.
His lanky arm easily managed to reach the book. Carefully, he trailed his long fingers to the carved book. it was vintage style and well, cool. With courage, Kris opened the cover and open it one by one.
This Journal belongs to:
Chanyeol Park
Kris was guessing that Chanyeol started his diary since the first time they're together. It was filled with their stories and firsts; kiss, holding hands, date, and you name it. Chanyeol really put it in detail (and PG of course) so it kinda brings back memories. The elder only smiled to himself over the writings. Kris would love to continue and enjoy every words were written there, but the thing was, it wasn't the right time. He really needed to jump to the page that contains the things he needed.
'OMFG! Kris hyung is now sick. And you know what? It's my entire fault. I nagged too much to him all this time and I didn't give a single thought about his health. He always agreed to go with me; it's must be because he felt guilty toward me about leaving me all day to work. I'm such a fool. He probably hates me now. ; __ ;
Another paragraph catches his attention,
I guess I'm a complete nuisance for Kris hyung, I won't be able to bring him happiness, being with me just makes Kris hyung suffer even more, and I hate it. I hate seeing Kris hyung suffers. Should I leave him? I mean probably it will make Kris hyung has more space and can finally free and happy. But it'll hurts me.
...
Nah, Kris hyung is my number one priority, so his happiness is way more important than anything. I shouldn't be selfish like this. All this time he already managed to bear with me, to deal to me who such a juvenile and crybaby. So now, it's my turn to give him some happiness. Don't be selfish, Park Chanyeol! I have to make Kris hyung happy, this is my second chance. If I can't, If leaving him is the best thing, I will do it.
Didn't he know that him being beside him and happy are enough to make Kris happy? Chanyeol knew that feelings so why would he didn't let Kris felt the same Those feelings were normal if you adore someone. And on top of that, Kris didn't get it. Was it all because he was sick? There must be reason. He flipped the page, still unsatisfied.
'Kris's Dad called me today'
Definitely this will answer everything. Kris' eyes stopped wandering and read the next sentences.
'Oh My God! This is getting worse. No, it’s not Kris hyung who is getting worse. And no, not again, it’s not his health what is getting worse. But the relationship of his family and me! I should've known why is hyung never bring me to his father. You know the reason?
Because, his dad doesn't like the idea of Kris loves guy. And, moreover, the guy is me. The ordinary guy who hasn't any parents or you can call me orphan, and definitely not even for Kris hyung. Hyung deserves better. I'll tell you the detail.
It was 3 a.m when I was woken up by hearing hyung' ringtone rang unstoppably. Hyung was sleeping and still was caught flu back then, so, I hurriedly checked the phone, scared that hyung might be got disturbed. I saw many missed calls and messages from his dad. I thought there were might be bad thing happened. So I opened the messages. Well, bad thing had happened, though, but not as I expected.
Nutshell, after I read all the messages, I asked Kris’s fellow on his work about this, and then I got the brief story so I can conclude that Kris hyung' dad wouldn't give the hire to hyung, stop supporting Kris hyung' work, in any way, and even will disown Kris hyung as a child if... if he still dating on me.
Okay, that's it. I already made hyung caught flu and now, I will make hyung lose his careers and got disowned by his own dad. So, as I already promised before, I will leave hyung.
But how?'
Even Kris lost count for how many times he sighed in only one day. It was true that his father threatened him like that but he already chose not to care. Kris didn't even put his dad on consideration, he never understand Kris. All this time, it had been his mom and not him when it came to raising child. All his dad was thinking was only money, career, and clients. He never even had time with his own family. Sadly, his mom was long gone because of car accident.
And anyway, it was hire, job, and money he was talking about. Kris could get it from anywhere but Chanyeol had been the only one for Kris, so it was clear which one he would prefer now. He didn't want to reply his father mistakes.
Back to the book, the rest was only about attempted run away which were ended up fail, which made Kris delighted.
Finally I got a chance, and I made it....
...
It hurts like hell...
"Then why did you leave me?" Couldn't held back, Kris mumbled to himself.
Suddenly, the sleeping boy beside him shifted, making Kris closed the book and paid all his attention to him.
"Hyuung." The boy whimpered. Sweats and trail of tears were still covering his skin. Kris really felt bad about the sight of Chanyeol's condition, but he could do nothing beside shushing him and caressing his hair.
"Chanyeol-la" He tried, and for a split second, Kris could feel how Chanyeol' body stiffen. The sleeping boy was now had his eyes wide-open shockingly. Chanyeol loosen his grip on Kris' hand nervously and sat down while having his head down all the time. Chanyeol knew, he was in a pretty much big trouble. Kris won't scold him too much, but what will Kris would say about this? He was so damn scared!
"Wha--t are you do- doing here?" He stuttered. Kris was still looking him with those sharp eyes, going nowhere but his eyes, not saying anything. The condition was really awkward and even as an outssider, you could feel that the tension was thick.
“I-I'm sorry."Chanyeol added when he practically didn't know what to do. He was just way too shock at the sudden sight when he woke up and it was getting intimidating.
"I’m searching for you, since you didn’t bid me a proper goodbye. And what are you sorry for?" Kris saw Chanyeol right into Chanyeol’ eyes, while the latter just averted the gaze as best as he could. Chanyeol was trembelling, he was so close to crying. Did Kris angry with him? No, truthfully, Kris wasn't angry with Chanyeol. Like hell! What did Chanyeol do that consider as 'wrong'? If anything, it was him he was angry to. The silent and staring were just because Kris was the same as Chanyeol, didn't know what to do.
The plotting inside the younger head was quick. As his last try, he was plotting to run away and just hid somewhere. But deep inside, he knew he had to face the truth no matter how painful it was, and he knew that he wouldn't make it smoothly. He was thoroughly battling inside his mind and the elder, of course, notice it.
"Why did you do that, may I ask?" Chanyeol kept silent, biting his lower lips.
"Are you going away because you're really sick of me and didn't want to live with me anymore, or--"
"NO!" Chanyeol stopped Kris' words in the midway. "You know that it was impossible..." He mumbled.
"So you're saying that you really left me because of the threatened of my dad and the insecurity in your head?" Chanyeol nodded... then stopped and snapped.
"How did you know?" His face showed horror.
"Don't dodge the question yeol-la. Now..." Kris shifted closer, making Chanyeol flinched.
'He's gonna scold me, he's gonna scold me, he's gonn-" Chanyeol stopped thinking when he felt a warm feeling. When Chanyeol had his body being hugged by the elder, he coldn't held his emotion back and started to dwell in agony.
"I-I thought you-you're gonna scold meeee-eee" Kris almost couldn't recognize the words. They were muffled and Chanyeol said it while crying between sobs, so Kris praise himself for able on catching the words.While rubbing his back, Kris said, "Why did you think I'm gonna scold you, eh?" Chanyeol replied it with another cry and sobs, he was triumphantly wetting Kris' cloth.
"hyuu~ung, I-I am sowreeyyy~" Kris chuckled a bit seeing his lover acting like that.
"You're laughing right? Why did you laugh? Are you putting prank on you playing with me?" Suddenly Chanyeol talked normally still between his sobs and making Kris laughing even more.
"Ssh... Yeol, ssh. I hate seeing you cry like this... and I'm not tricking you nor playing with you." Kris moved his hands to Chanyeol' shoulder to give their body a little gap so he could see Chanyeol face. He was pouting cutely but the hiccup still there. His nose was red and his eyes swollen. Kris sighed again.
"You don't hate seeing me cry. You even laugh." He was so look alike with child throwing a tantrum, making Kris couldn't help but pinch his reddened nose.
"Yeol, look at me now." Chanyeol refused to do so,
"Yeol-la" The way he said it, Chanyeol just knew that he should obeyed the elder, and so he finally did as said. He finally looked up and locked his eyes to Kris'. He always knew that Kris really had a stunning orbs, but since lately he always avert his lover's gaze, he was falling deep once again. His heart's paced up like he was meeting Kris for the first time.
He could feel his body warming up because of Kris' eyes, and magically he felt calmer. There were still hiccups though, but it was subsiding gradually. Kris leaned his forehead until touched Chanyeol's one, still locking their eyes. Chanyeol was still shaking because of hiccups, but neither of them averted each other gaze. Chanyeol closed his eyes when he sensed the elder leaned closer again. Kris gave a light brush between their lips so Chanyeol barely felt it.
Kris leaned once again to taste it for real now. Kris chooses Chanyeol's bottom lips to it at slow pace and massaged it slowly, earning soft sighs of pleasure slipped the younger' mouth. He could feel the hot breath of Chanyeol's sigh against his skin. Kris smiled secretly as he tilted the younger's head to earn a better angle. They moved in perfect sync.
Chanyeol sneaked his arms around Kris' neck and pulled the elder closer, while Kris was steadying Chanyeol by gripping Chanyeol slim waist. Kris thumbs rubbing Chanyeol pelvis slowly making the younger let out soft moans against his mouth. They parted their lips by force of needing some air. It only take a moment before they were connecting each other lips once again. Kris Chanyeol's bottom lips right after he met Chanyeol' lips with his own, asking for permission, and Chanyeol gladly opened his mouth, hence, the fluff-kiss turned into the passionate one, since the kissing started to include sound and each other's tongue. Chanyeol was way too limp to not leaning to Kris crooked neck. He breathed heavily and closing his eyes, too tired from the early make out, probably, which was making Kris smiled and chuckled audibly.
It was one hot session since forever. The kiss made them both realized that affection to each other was the one they needed. The lack of time they were together made them busy with each other's insecurities. While Chanyeol was scared that Kris' father words were true, Kris was trying to acknowledge Chanyeol's weird behavior. Moreover they have Kris' father who made it worse. So though they're together, their minds were too busy thinking for each other, ironic.
"Feeling better?" Kris asked, "Cause I am" he breathed out with smug smile. For Kris, he wished the kiss could be longer since he missed the younger so much, but then seeing Chanyeol like this, he doubted it. After the long cry maybe it was really hard, though.
Chanyeol nodded and smiled sheepishly while fiddling with his fingers, "You should've done that before. It eased my insecurities, ahhh." Chanyeol finished it with a long relief sighed as he leaned closer to the elder. It was pretty much shock to Kris, Chanyeol's behavior was like upside down compared to before. Chanyeol continued, "it was as if my problems that were battling inside my mind has been up..." and laughed as he couldn't find any better word.
"You never asked me for it" Kris shrugged nonchalantly. Chanyeol straightened up and said, "I love you, hyung." He smiled sweetly, and Oh how Kris missed it so much; the last time he saw it was right before he was sick.
"I love you more, bae."
"No! I love you mooaar."
"No, I do~. Now stop for a while and you have to eat or else I won't be able to bring you home." Kris changed the topic quickly and took the food. He actually was ready for rejection, and so he already prepared the answer.
"Kay! Feed me!"
"No Channie, you should... what?!" He definitely didn't expect a right-away acceptance. So Kris couldn't more happy to agree with it.
It only took a while for Kris to feed the hungry Chanyeol. After that, they laid their back comfortably talking about stuff while Chanyeol hanging to Kris' torso.
"Yeol" Kris suddenly voiced out while Chanyeol's locks
"Hmm?" Chanyeol leaned closer, loving the sensation when the latter uttered his name.
"Do you really meant it? When you say your problems are gone already?" Chanyeol looked up into Kris eyes. He smiled, showing his rich teeth and pecked Kris' kiss-able lips.
"Yes hyung. I mean it" he said before snuggled back to Kris chest. Kris smiled and hugged Chanyeol tighter.
"So, mind to tell me everything?"
"Later hyung, I'm tired now, I want to sleep. I promise I will tell you." Chanyeol mumbled softly, showing that he really meant it.
"Okay, I can wait the story. But I'm afraid you can't sleep now, baby."
"Why~?" Kris chuckled, hearing that cute, at least for Kris, whined. He could see the younger pouted childishly.
"I'm not alone, hon"
"Yes, yes, I know right. You're with me now. So?" Chanyeol blurted out, earning more chuckle from the elder.
"I mean, I came here with Baekhyun and Tao. And we should go home today." Kris answered, while rubbing Chanyeol's back.
"Aaah~" Chanyeol whined but got up anyway. He threw his legs over the bed and jumped a little to stand up. Really this was the Chanyeol Kris know all along, a ball of energy.
"Now, be ready. And don't forget your diary okay? We need it later." Kris smiled slyly to Chanyeol as he walked toward door, leaving Chanyeol dumbfounded.
"H-hyung? You... you read it... YOU READ IT. HYUNG! YOU READ IT! YOU'RE SO MEEAAN!" Chanyeol exclaimed, trying to get Kris' attention but no avail.
“Just faster, Chanyeol, I don’t wanna get stuck on the road later” Kris was definitely suppressing his laugh, making Chanyeol huffing and mumbling about how disrespectful Kris was.
Right after he packed his stuffs, Chanyeol went to downstairs. He noticed there were four people who sat while talking together. He planned to just wait until they finished their talking, since it seemed Baekhyun missed the lady so much. But he plan was only the plan, eventually. He didn't even finish his last stair and Baekhyun was practically screaming on top of his lung when he saw Chanyeol’ figure.
“YOU STUPID BASTARD! WHAT THE F-- IS IN YOUR MIND?” Everybody just gaped unbelievably; excluding Chanyeol.
“Calm down, yo.” Chanyeol said nonchalantly. Baekhyun got up from his seat and came closer to Chanyeol hastily; almost running. And before they realized what happens, Chanyeol already groaned in pain; Baekyhun smacked Chanyeol head wholeheartedly. They’re shocked, but, once again, not Chanyeol. Chanyeol just smacked Baekhyun back. The lady, who was basically their mom, finally overcame the little-fight they were having.
.
“YOU TWO CHILDISH PEOPLE, STOP IT!” Those two overgrown-childish-men put their head down, ready to be lectured by their mom.
Kris and Tao, who just recovered from the shocking moment earlier, looked at them warmly. The sight exactly looked like 2 boys got scolded by their mom. Then they got up from their seat and decided to just gave them space and wait on the outside.
When the reunion time finished, they all bade goodbye politely to the lady, and went straight to the car. Kris was already in front of the back seat door when suddenly, Tao said,“Hyung, can you drive us back?” and yawned.
“Tao!” Baekhyun scolded, “Kris is tired, he hasn’t sle-“
“No it’s okay Baek,” Kris interjected. “I’ll drive back.”
“Are you sure?” Baekhyun said, he can’t do anything; he didn’t have driving license, since he thought it wasn't so necessary. But maybe he'll consider to make one later.
“I’m okay, you guys just take a rest okay?” Kris secretly massaged his temple slowly. The spinning inside his head was unstoppable, but still he knew it was his responsibility to make them all like this. Yeah it was his problem after all, and he was the eldest amongst all on top of that. But as secretive as he tried, Chanyeol noticed it right away though.
“Hyung, are you really okay? Or you want to me drive you all?” Chanyeol sneakily whispered to the elder’s right ears.
“No, it’s okay, Yeol. You’re tired anyway,and besides, you don’t have driving license too.”
“You’re tired too hyung.” Chanyeol practically whines.
“But I have driving license, it’s the different.” Kris pinched Chanyeol’s nose before hit his back slowly, signaling the boy to get in the car. Chanyeol only pouted and did as said.
On the way back home Baekhyun and Tao were already went to their own dreamland while, no matter how hard Kris insisted, Chanyeol was still pushing himself to open his eyes and awake.
"Cha-“
“No”
“Lis-“
“No, hyung, I said no!” He tried to open his eyes as wide as possible.
Kris was about to give up and suddenly remembered that he had a CD that contained a bunch of slow songs and so he used it as his last attempt to make the stubborn boy fell asleep.
“Hyung, it’s useless! Turn it off!" Chanyeol demanded. He was freaking in the edge of sleeping, and this song obviously and definitely didn't help him at all!
“Why? I could be fresher by hearing this kind of song” Kris reasoned and Chanyeol could do nothing but to comply. He shot a glare to the elder. He huffed loudly; his body stayed still, was still trying his best not to close his eyes and fell asleep.
‘Stubborn kids’ Kris thought. He slowly reached his hands slowly to block Chanyeol sight with his giant palm and pushed him to rest his head on the headrest.
“No hyung~” But Chanyeol has lost his strength already. Kris kept on closing Chanyeol eyes. It was kinda hard though; driving while making the younger sleep. He started to Chanyeol temple slowly. He didn't need so much time to make the tired boy drifted into a deep slumber
“Wake up all.” Kris said hoarsely, receive no move from three of them, Déjà vu.
Kris shook their body, except Chanyeol. They groaned in unison and came to their senses.Kris left the two to gained their souls back and toted Chanyeol bridal style and put him carefully to the back of his car. Considered from how Chanyeol didn't wake up, he must be so sleepy. Chanyeol snuggled closer to Kris neck when Kris toted him. Kris bade goodbye to them and thanked them before finally decided to leave.
Chanyeol woke up when he heard some noises outside, ‘Where am I? So fluffy… fluffy?’ Chanyeol frowned at his own thought. He hurriedly sat when he realized that he was in his and Kris bed. Then he heard cracked sound; the sound of door was being opened by someone.
“Kris hyung~” He whined when he saw familiar presence behind the door. Kris chuckled and opened the gap some more.
“What’s wrong, my baby” Chanyeol narrowed his eyes as if he was ready to scold.
“Hyung is so mean” he looked up amd gave the elder strong gaze.
“Why?” Kris chuckled and came closer to sit beside Chanyeol.
“You made me sleep and you didn’t wake me up. You definitely played those songs on purpose, really you’re so mean!” Chanyeol pouted and hit Kris shoulder repeatedly when he said those words. Then he back to lay his body and covered his head to toe with his blanket.
“Look at that, who is sulking now?” Kris giggled, ‘Cute!!’ Kris can feel he was screaming inside. He lowered himself to engulfed the covered Chanyeol with his body.
“Hyung!” Chanyeol exclaimed in shock. “Move! You’re heavy you know.” Kris started to tickle the younger and earned messy chuckles from the latter.
“Ah!” Chanyeol gasped suddenly.
“W-Why?” Kris worriedly said.
“M-My ankle, hyung!” Kris hurriedly moves away and opens the blanket to see the younger scrunching his nose. Kris muttering ‘I’m sorry’ while kissing Chanyeol’ nasal bone to make the younger calmer.
“Bad, bad hyung!” Chanyeol said as he poked Kris cheek once for each words. Then Kris and Chanyeol just cuddled together. Chanyeol snuggled his nose between Kris crooked neck and took a deep and long breath to feel Kris more while Kris buried his face in Chanyeol’ locks and did the same thing.
They’re finally able to relax their body and mind.
They’re finally able to feel safe in each other hugs.
They’re finally able to sigh in relief.
And it really the thing that couple wanted.
“Chanyeol, it’s not over yet, you know” Kris mumbled. Chanyeol pulled away a bit, body still connected to each other, frowning.
“What is exactly happened when I’m sick? What did exactly my dad said to you?.”
“Should I, hyung? Really?”
“Yes” Kris deadpanned. Chanyeol sighed before finally starts the story.
----
Ring. Ring. Ring.
Chanyeol agitated uncomfortably at his sleep, disturbed by the sound.
Ring. Ring. Ring.
“Urr~” Chanyeol groaned a bit, before finally he was back to his senses. The rings were ringing again. This time, Chanyeol noticed a flicker of light on the other side of him. He recognized it as Kris’ phone and he had to hurry up picking the phone before the elder woke up. Chanyeol reached his hand to the phone a pressed the button to at least silent the phone.
Papa miscall (12)
Messages (2)
He was shocked on how he and his lover could be such a sleepyhead like this. Chanyeol sat and hurriedly moved his thumbs to type the password. Seeing the number of missed calls, he could dumbly deducted that it was something important. His stomach flipped in a bad way, he really felt weird. He could only hope that it wasn’t something bad. Then he timidly opened the messages and read it. He just didn’t know that it was really bad that he had to get out from their bedroom. His sight was blocked by a shadow of tears on his eyes. Weakly, he dragged his foot to the couch and sat there, staring blankly to nowhere.
Every line he read,
his heartbeat would fastened,
his eyes widened in shock for once or twice,
his heart would shatter in pieces and keep on breaking again
and his tears would continuously found their way to Chanyeol’s cheek.
Chanyeol closed his eyes for a moment and just let it all of his tears fell.
-Papa-
Wu Fan, I really don’t understand why the heck do you choose that orphan guy over me, the one who raise you up! I already gave you understanding for you to be gay! But, he is an orphan and definitely doesn’t have any bright future like you! I choose the best for you. That orphan guy won’t bring happiness to you. He doesn’t even have a clear background! We didn’t know anything about it!
-Papa-
WU FAN! HOW DARE YOU IGNORE ME, YOU DISRESPECTFUL SON! I MEANT IT WHAT I TOLD YOU BEFORE, I MEANT IT! YOU WILL DEFINITELY REGRET IT!
A great pain ravaged his soul at second his brain confirmed the texts. Without being told, he already thought he was a burden, and now, being told, worse, by Kris' father, he really felt like a living scum. It was true for him that he never brought any happiness for the elder. The only thing he did was only troubling Kris, anyway. A sob unconsciously passed through his trembling lips, and the sound echoed through the room. Chanyeol bit his lower-lip rather harshly, preventing the other sobs passed. Gradually, he curled himself into a ball and let himself sobs some more, with hope this would, at least, ease the throbbing ache in his heart. The ache felt like something was clutching tightly and would break his heart into pieces in any moment. And it didn't seem to go away.
No, it wasn't because he was being told that he didn't have any bright future like Kris did nor being addressed as an orphan, because it was the truth. The pain is more like coming from the guilty of his guilty pleasure; he was a burden, now and forevermore. It wasn't something he could change right away, he knew that he unconsciously asked selfish things and made a bad decision, so he didn't know how to change this annoying part of him.
‘So Kris already tells his father, secretly,’ Chanyeol thought.
A vibrate on his pocket disrupt his mind. He fished out his phone and saw that the time indicated that he had to start his morning work to prepare things.
---
"That's how it is." Chanyeol finished his story.
Kris pulled Chanyeol closer and rubbed his upper hand. He now got it the reason of Chanyeol's behavior, and he sure regretted it telling his father. Well, more like he regretted it he didn't put his phone on silent, or to be such a sleepyhead and didn't hear his own ringtone. Kris sighed seeing the gloomy Chanyeol under his nose.
"I'm sorry, this has to happen to you." Chanyeol looked up and smiled sweetly.
"You didn't have to apologize, you know" he continued, "First, it wasn't your fault, or anyone. Secondly, part of your dad's stories are undeniable truth that happened to me. Maybe if anyone has to say sorry, it was me. I mean, I shouldn't have act that way. I should've just stand up and put trust on you, not running away like a spoiled brat." Kris was ready to talk back to Chanyeol, but the latter prevent it by pressing his lips softly.
"But I know you won't let me feel sorry and blame myself for this. And so do I. So, instead, let's just forget about this and think about how we face your father." Chanyeol said after shut Kris up. Kris saw the determined eyes of Chanyeol, and decide to end this too.
"Okay, " Kris sighed before continued, "Buuut, the whole story still shady for me, there's some missing pieces on your story, right?" Chanyel frowned at that. He sure told Kris anything, or so it was he believed.
Seeing the helplessly confused face, Kris decide to ask directly, the whole patient he had was actually growing thin, and he really did want to know all these things before taking the next step, "What about the thing Lu Han told you, I mean, how you-“
“HYUNG!” Chanyeol exclaimed with wide-and-puffy-eyes.
“What?” Kris was taken aback, to say the least.
“Lu Han ge told you!?” Chanyeol says in high pitch, oh so manly.
“Yes, I pushed him. So mind to tell me now? Besides, I already read your diary so it does make sense if I already knew it a bit.” Kris smirked teasingly. Chanyeol grunted but told him eventually; it wasn't like he had much choices.
---
Chanyeol forced his smile when Kris woke up from his deep slumber. Chanyeol would gradually his upper-lip nervously when Kris showed affection, an he guessed that Kris noticed something was wrong with him. Kris would some times asked Chanyeol what was wrong, and the answer would be the same, "I'm perfectly fine, it's you who should we worry about."
Everytime Kris did something sweet to him, his mind would automatically said that he didn't deserve this even the slightest. Kris' loves were too overbearing for him, it was too good to be true. Kris wouldn't know about the messages. Chanyeol deleted it when Kris was sleeping. He didn’t know whether it was a good thing or not, but at least he didn’t want Kris suffered more, on top of that, when he was sick. He forced Kris to take more rests, even Kris said that he was okay.
‘Hell, 38ᵒC is definitely far from okay’
Chanyeol got a phone call in the midday, when Kris was reasting. He saw the caller's ID and frowned. There were only numbers showed, and he was sure he always save his friends numbers. Chanyeol answered the call and said 'hello?'. He didn't even finished his sentence. The person across the phone said his greeting and it was rather shocked the poor Chanyeol.
“Hello, Chanyeol, I’m Wu Fan’s dad.”
“Y-Yes, Mr. Wu?” Chanyeol stuttered.
“The reason I call you now is simple. I want you to leave Kris” Chanyeol was devastated, the pang of pain was beyond explainable.
“B-But” Chanyeol knew; he knew it so well that he didn’t deserve Kris. But he loved him so much and leaving Kris was out of his choices. It was selfish of him and he was perfectly aware of that, but sooner or later, he knew he had to act regardless of his desire.
“Do you really love my son?”
“O-Of course.”
“So you do want the best for him and bring happiness to him right?”
“Yes” Chanyeol said weakly.
“So can you imagine how is my son's future if he is still with you?”
“…”
“Just be real, Chanyeol. You can’t bring happiness for him. You onlywill make Kris’ life more miserable. You're just an orphan guy. You don't even have any parent. You will only bring trouble for Kris. You have to understand me. He was the only child of mine, and I want the best for him, we both want it. And you're aware that living with you wasn't the best of him.
Chanyeol was crying. The pain was sure unbearable. It hurt so much hearing those kinds of words. He already knew that fact, and he now had to experience his fresh scar being rubbed by a sour lemon.
“Crying won’t solve anything, Chanyeol. Just face the reality. I hope you are aware where you stand and where Wu Fan stands, and that your place is not even close to Wu Fan.” he continued, "So please think my words throughly and make the best decision for three of us."
Then the connection was cut by Kris’ father. Chanyeol puts his phone slowly, still crying. His shoulder shaking, he shut his mouth thightly, so his whimper won't wake the elder up.
Ding.
Chanyeol's ears perked up, 'who is that, in the middle of the day?" He hurriedly swept his tears from his cheek with his backhand, and wash his face. Sure the redness and the swollen on his face still showed its evidence, but at least he could make a make up story for it.
Ding. Ding. Ding.
He half-run to the front door to open the door for impatient guests, which were apparently, Kris’s fellows, Lu Han and Sehun.
“Channie? Why are you crying? Is Kris that bad?” Lu Han blabbered once his eyes caught Chanyeol’s puffy eyes. Chanyeol chuckled and let both of them in. once they sit, Chanyeol starts the conversation.
“Do you both like me?” Sehun and Lu Han both were taken aback of that.
“I-I’m sorry. It’s not what I mean. I mean do you both like me, in brotherly way?” Lu Han and Sehun nodded their head eagerly. They really liked Chanyeol, actually.
“Then, mind to tell me what is exactly going on between Kris hyung and his father?” their eyes were widened in shock.
“Look, maybe Kris hyung did tell you to shut your mouth. But please, I really need it.” Got no answer, Chanyeol shot his best chance with his puppy-eyes.
“Sorry hyung, I have no right. Kris didn’t tell me.” Sehun said apologetically. Chanyeol moved his gaze to his gege. Lu Han agitated in his seat uncomfortably.
“B-But, don’t tell Kris please. I really don’t want to bear his anger and I sure be dead, okay? He was so temperamental when it came to you.” Chanyeol giggled and nodded.
“So, as you know that Kris’ father is one of the other big companies that would support him financially. And Kris, being the only son he is, is going to receive the heir from his dad. But, as you know too, that Kris’ father doesn’t like the fact that his child is gay.” Lu Han really put his own word carefully while occasionally checken on Chanyeol's expression, which showed nothing. Chanyeol didn’t even flinched or showed any reaction. Lu Han took a deep breath before continued,
“So, he threatened Kris that if he is still dating you, he will stop supporting him in any possible way and… disowns him.” Lu Han was practically whispering at the last two words, yet, loud enough for Chanyeol to hear. Chanyeol took a deep breath, really, he couldn’t cry now. He smiled forcefully to the two guys in front of him.
“Thank you ge, for telling me. It really helps me. So now, if you want to look after Kris hyung, he is in our room. Just get in, it’s okay. I have to buy Kris’ medicine.” Chanyeol said quickly- almost too quick. He couldn't cry now, not here with them in front of him. They both nod their head and seeing Chanyeol’s figure gone when Chanyeol closes the front door.
“Hunnie, was I hearing right? That Chanyeol was in the phone with Kris’s dad before?”
“I think, hyung”
“So… did Chanyeol cry because of it?” Lu Han bits his bottom lip. Sehun sighed as he shook his head while muttering ‘I don’t know.’
---
Kris could feel the boiling anger inside him was ready to explode in any moment now. He didn't knew that his father could did such sly things to Chanyeol, it never passed his mind. Kris had to hold his anger in sake of Chanyeol, buth the regret, pain, and upset were beyond bearable for him. He closed his eyes to calm down, but his hand clenched the younger's upper harm hard. Chanyeol agitated nervously. He never saw Kris in such state. Maybe his friends said that he was tempramental, but still, he never saw such things. He knew that telling the elder was never a good idea, he really just wanted to forget it, but he didn't have any choices, after all the things happened, he wanted to openly tell anything to his lover.
"H-Hyung, can't breathe" Chanyeol said nervously. But he got no moves from Kris. Kris was trying his best to control his anger right now or else it will make Chanyeol scared, and it was the last thing he want to experience. Chanyeol still agitated uncomfortably, hoping to gain at least a little attention from the elder, but failed miserably. Kris was practically locked him with his arms. The thing he could freely moved was only his head. Out of the blue, he got this random and irrelevant idea. Thus, he his lips nervously, and then he bit anything that is reachable, then quickly looked to the other way while closing his eyes tight. He was really scared that Kris would scold him or anything. Kris felt his sense back. He loosened clutch and looked down to see the younger. Kris saw the younger reaction amusedly.
‘Is it possible for him to be any cuter than this?’ Kris can feel his soul shrieked, seeing how Chanyeol acted.
“Chanyeol” Kris whispered softly,making Chanyeol shuddered.
“Y-yes?” Chanyeol still looked down, playing with his hands. Kris put Chanyeol’s chin up and kissed the said boy’s lips slowly, earning a soft gasp from the younger.
“I’m sorry, Yeol” Kris said between the kisses.
"Urm..." While Chanyeol couldn't even utter a word, and only clutching thigthly to the elder's clothes.
"I- It's okay. I'm sorry too, I bit you." Chanyeol's face flushed with embarrassement. his face was so close to the elder, he could faintly feel the graze of Kris' breath against his neck. Kris chuckled.
"I'm sorry too, that you have to hear my father's words." Chanyeol's eyes finally fixed to the elder.
"I said that it wasn't ypur fault. If you said sorry then I would too, --" Kris shut Chanyeol's mouth, with his own way.
"Cheating."
“Everything that my father said to you is completely wrong. First of all, I’m happy with you. Second, you never be ‘just’ for me. And the last is, my future is brighter when I’m with you.”
“Eww, so cheesy hyung.”
“Don’t you like it?”
“Sometimes, somehow” Chanyeol giggles.
“But hyung, talking about that, how about your father? I don’t want to make you lose your heir, or your father disowns you. He is still your father. You should respect him." Chanyeol mumbled and nibbled his bottom-lip slowly.
“I do respect him, Yeol. I already talked to him, on the day you hurt your ankle. He gave up and he won’t disown me. But I still will lose my heir. Because he didn't disown me with me promising that I will live happily with you, even without his help, and I will surely proof it to him” Kris smiled to Chanyeol and Chanyeol cheeks softly.
"Sure thing?"
"Sure thing!"
With that, Chanyeol snuggled even closer to Kris and let him being pampered with the elder. At least, now he could sleep contentedly, without guilty nor pain.
"Sleep well..."
---
“Hunnie~”
“What?”
“Chanyeol is back, Kris told me. They are on their way back to home. Kris said that Chanyeol is sleeping now.”
“Finally… they’re so complicated. You, don’t even do that okay?”
“Absolutely not, Hunnie~” Then the shorter hugged the other tightly.
“Good. Do you want to visit them tomorrow?”
“Yes, yes” Lu Han nodded his head eagerly, making the younger chuckled. Sehun leaned closer and pecked Lu Han lips softly.
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Sorry for my crappy English :'<
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