It’s a cold winter’s day and Kris and Henry are sitting in the back room of the SM building, heater on full blast, trying to remind each other that they still speak English. Not that Henry needs much reminding what with Amber and Twitter, but Kris likes to remember that he didn’t grow up in Korea.

“Agh, it’s nice to get away from the kids,” Kris says with the air of someone surrounded by one hundred unruly children. It hurts being one of the oldest.

“Agh,” Henry agrees, because he can’t say the same, being the maknae. “It’s nice to get away from everything. We should do this more often.”

“We never see each other,” Kris says, and stretches, resting his back against a mirror. He tilts his head back to stare at the ceiling and thinks that it’s just nice to sit like this.

“Well that’s because you just debuted and you’re always in China,” Henry points out, not unreasonably.

Kris shrugs, because both of them promote in China, it’s not that ridiculous. Speaking of other countries, “Have you gone home recently?” Kris asks, thinking of Canada and how much he misses it. He loves China, but he loves Canada just as much.

Henry nods. “Yeah, I just got back. Every time I come back I always get grief about it. Kyuhyun keeps asking me how Vancouver was.” Kris looks back down to see him narrow his tiny eyes.

“But you’re not from Vancouver,” Kris says.

Henry raises an eyebrow at him in a yes, Captain Obvious way.

“Oh,” Kris says. He pauses. “I’m from Vancouver,” he says. “Maybe I should talk to him?”

“He won’t understand you,” Henry says flatly.

Kris opens his mouth to argue something, although in defence of his Korean or defence of Kyuhyun’s ability to understand him, he doesn’t know.

“He won’t understand you,” Henry repeats.

Kris shuts his mouth and they sit there for a couple of moments before he opens his mouth again. “Have you heard our song?”

This seems to do the trick because Henry jolts upright, crosses his legs, and says, with the wickedest smile Kris has seen him produce ever, “What on earth is that English you guys chant? It’s amazing. There aren’t even words to describe how confusing it is. And, like, the National Geographic voice at the beginning, I’m not sure that actually is English and he’s just there to confuse you. And God, the Chinese lyrics of History? They’re like the cheesiest things I’ve ever heard. Who even wrote those?”

Kris immediately resents himself for asking. “‘You know, when you really love someone, just go for it’,” he quotes flatly in response, and Henry bursts out laughing.

“Okay, I admit, it could be worse,” he says. “But I quite liked ‘you feelin’ my strings?’ because that song and the English rap could have been so awful but thankfully they weren’t.” He stops. “You know what I like? Whatever the SHINee boys rap in the Japanese version of A.Mi.Go.”

Kris pauses for a second as he thinks. “‘You’re the hottest ice cream ninja’?” he offers, and Henry starts laughing again. To counter, Kris says, “What about The Boys? That’s got some interesting lines in it.”

Henry his head to the side. “…‘Call all emergency, I’m watching the phone ring, I’m feeling this in my heart’?”

“‘My heart’,” Kris repeats, completely deadpan. Henry snorts. “Ah, but let’s not forget ‘Girl you know what I’m sayin’, you know it ain’t no lie’.”

“‘Wanna take some time ’cuz I really feel your style’,” Henry raps calmly. “That’s not that bad,” he argues.

“‘It’d be kind of cool to be rollin’ with you’?” Kris says.

“‘Roar like a buffalo, whoops! They already know’,” Henry counters.

“‘I hope you noticed that ’cuz it’s too cool too ignore’.” Kris chuckles. “I was sad they took that out of the song, you know,” he says. “I was quite fond of it.”

“It’s now immortal,” Henry says. “A thousand fangirls have it saved on their computers to listen to when they’re sad. You know it’s true.” A pause. “I like what did get in, though. ‘Selected VIPs wouldn’t it be mind-blowingly awesome, now we’re on a rock-rock-rocket, just gotta keep your seatbelt fastened’. Now that’s some slick lines.”

“‘No you’re not gonna shoulda-woulda this and coulda-woulda that ’cuz we’re never coming back to this trap. See those two full moons, you’re the chosen knight, go and spread good news, ’cuz we got no time’,” Kris raps after him, with a small smile.

“Okay,” Henry concedes. “Some of Two Moons is kind of awesome.”

Kris nods his head and they sit in comfortable silence again for another moment before Kris offers, “‘Because I naughty naughty’.”

“‘Hey, I’m Mr. Simple’,” Henry finishes automatically. “That’s not even my song,” he adds, “so don’t look at me.”

Kris shrugs. “Didn’t say it was,” he teases.

Henry raises an eyebrow. “I saw you thinking it,” he says.

“Super Girl’s yours though. ‘He’s not Superman, he must be Mama boy’?”

Henry shrugs this time. “No idea. Didn’t write the lyrics. Makes no sense anyway.” He thinks for a moment. “‘Hey baby love crash’.”

“‘Do not break br-break’,” Kris agrees. “A-CHA is weird.”

“Yeah, I know,” Henry says. “SM’s English is weird. Even, like, the little examples. ‘Fantastic elastic’, ‘loverholic robotronic’, ‘electronic manic supersonic bionic energy’, um, what else?”

Kris pauses as he thinks. “‘Still I have romantic in my heart?” Kris offers.

Henry blinks at him. “…yeah, sure,” he says. “That works.”

Kris rests his head on the mirror behind him again and watches Henry for a few moments until the door flings open.

“Henry! You’re back!” Kyuhyun shouts gleefully, and waves excitedly. “How was it?”

“Hi, Hyung,” Kris says, and Kyuhyun nods at him.

“Hyung,” Henry says. “Canada was great.”

“Oh, Bancouber,” Kyuhyun says knowingly.

“Kris is from Vancouver, Hyung. I’m from Toronto,” Henry says, sounding exasperated. “I keep telling you this.”

Kyuhyun blinks, turns to Kris, and says, “Bancouber?”

“Yes, Hyung,” Kris replies in English.

“Bancouber!” Kyuhyun beams. “I want to go to Bancouber to see Henry’s parents.”

“I don’t live in Vancouver!” Henry whines and Kris snorts.

“You can meet mine, but not Henry’s,” Kris tries to explain, but Kyuhyun blinks at him in a confused way. “…but my Korean is fine?” Kris says, confused. Kyuhyun blinks again.

“I told you so,” Henry says.

“Bancouber!” Kyuhyun says cheerfully.

“But…?” Kris asks in English.

“天哪, 你能离开了吗?” Henry says dryly and Kris starts laughing, mostly under his breath. Kyuhyun looks confused.

“What did you say? What did he say?” he asks Kris. “Henry! Kris! Tell me! Was it about Bancouber?”

Kris just shakes his head. “天啊, 走开啦!” he mutters under his breath, and Henry laughs this time.

Kyuhyun just blinks in a confused way, crosses his arms, and storms out like a small child. “Zhou Miiiiiii~,” Kris can hear him whine like a toddler, “they’re being mean to me! I don’t speak Chinese.”

Kris and Henry look at each other and burst into laughter.

“I like this,” Kris says.

“Me too,” Henry replies.

“But I swear he’s from Bancouber!” Kris can hear Kyuhyun whining somewhere off in the distance and he starts laughing again.

When Henry looks at him, he simply says, “I miss Vancouver,” and they don’t stop laughing.
 

天哪, 你能离开了吗 means “my god, can you leave already” according to nisakomi

天啊, 走开啦 means “oh god, go away” according to @zhoumee