Chapter ∞

 

It was the perfect love letter. A balance between sweet words and a great portrayal of genuine feelings.

At least it was that way to Oh Sehun.

So why?

Why was his perfectly constructed love letter, which he mustered up so much courage to put in his crush’s locker, in the hands of a short, bespectacled blonde-haired boy?

Why wasn’t it in the hands of the school’s resident sweetheart, Go Eun Bi?

With a barely audible ‘um…’, said bespectacled boy kept his head hung low and both arms extended towards Sehun, his love letter clutched tight in his hands.

“Thank you,” the boy said. “It was… sweet. Um, I can’t really give an answer but… oh! I have to go now. See you tomorrow!”

As Sehun watched the blonde-haired boy skip, skip, towards a white car, Sehun had to wrack his brain to think of any other moment in his life that came close to this. Not only did his letter get into the wrong hands, but did he also just get rejected?

 

 

The loudest sound in Friday morning’s Math class was the echo of Chen’s laughter. The teacher was a little more than a little late, considering that ten minutes have passed into class time. Not that Sehun was complaining. But Chen’s obvious amusement over his little blunder was getting on his nerves.

“Wait… so… you didn’t bother making sure that you got the right locker? Not only that but… you didn’t bother writing her name on the letter? Such a ladies’ man you are, Sehun-ah,” Chen said in between laughs.

Sehun flicked Chen’s forehead. “It was her locker. I’ve seen her putting her stuff in there plenty of—”

“Stalker,” Chen said with pretend disgust.

“Shut up. Okay, I admit. Writing her name on it would’ve been better but… ugh!” Sehun groaned as his forehead landed with Chen’s desk. Sehun could feel Chen patting his upper back as comfort but he really just wanted time to rewind.

“It’s not that bad,” Chen said, making Sehun look up at his friend. “Just explain to him that it was a misunderstanding. A little… snafu.”

Sehun’s brows creased. “Snafu?”

Chen nodded. “Just a little snafu on your part. Get the letter back, give it to Eun Bi personally. All solved.”

Before Sehun could respond, the incredibly late Math teacher came in, apology in tow and started the class.

 

 

All solved? All solved?

How can anyone solve this?

“My sisters kind of found your letter and uh… they invited you to have some food after school at my house,” the boy said, looking at his shuffling feet. Sehun thought this whole situation was going downhill fast and if he didn’t recover soon, he’ll scrape his knees or completely break his legs.

“That—”

“Ah! You don’t have to, if you don’t want. I mean, it would be a little awkward… yeah, awkward… and weird….” blondie said, his mouth forming such a natural looking pout, it was creeping Sehun out. Not only that, but the boy actually had the audacity to look sad! It was as if he wanted Sehun to come. But no way. No way was Sehun going to go. This whole mix-up had to be straightened out. He didn’t need any food from little blondie. No way, no how.

“I can visit for a while,” Sehun said, wanting to smack himself for going in a direction that was the opposite of what he wanted.

But for a second, a really small second, Sehun felt something weird when he saw little blondie’s mouth corners turn up. Something that felt like pride. Pride that he made little blondie smile, but that was stupid. He wanted Go Eun Bi to smile at him, not little blondie. Not only that, he didn’t even know little blondie’s name so—

Oh , he didn’t even know blondie’s name.

 

 

Little blondie’s house was huge. Huge was probably still a small adjective to describe the house. It was gigantic, enormous, gargantuan. And now in this gigantic, enormous, gargantuan house, he was sitting in the gigantic, enormous, gargantuan living room on a sofa next to blondie, with his two older sisters right across from him.

“So you’re the one who wrote our little Luhan that sweet love letter,” sister number one said.

Ah, Luhan. So that’s his name.

Sehun gave a small smile because there was no way he could nod to a lie.

“So handsome! I wish I had a boy like you to write me a love letter back when I was in high school,” sister number two said.

“Noona,” Sehun heard Luhan say quietly in an embarrassed tone.

“It’s fine, isn’t it? It was a sweet love letter. Luhan was smiling the whole night yesterday,” sister number two said.

“Noona!” Luhan said louder, causing both his sisters to laugh loudly.

“I get it, I get it. Anyway, we haven’t introduced ourselves. I’m Soo-yeon and this is Sunkyu,” sister number one said. “Take care of Luhan from now on. We’ll be back. Come on, Sun.”

With slight retaliation from sister number two aka Sunkyu, both sisters left the room. Sehun was an only child so he didn’t really know how sibling relationships worked but it seemed like Luhan had really nice sisters, pretty too.

“Your sisters—”

“Are annoying. Sorry about that,” Luhan said, with an apologetic smile.

“I was going to say that they’re nice. Kind of funny too. You should really stop that habit, though,” Sehun said.

“Habit?” Luhan asked, getting his cup of tea from the coffee table.

“Cutting people off mid-sentence,” Sehun said.

Luhan’s mouth formed into an O shape before sipping his tea and Sehun found it irritating. This was going a little too far for his taste. He’d managed to get from strangers to being acquainted with Luhan’s sisters in the space of two days. He had to admit that the letter wasn’t for Luhan. He had to admit it now.

“Luhan,” Sehun said firmly, but Sehun must’ve startled the little blondie because he spilled hot tea all over himself. “Are you okay?”

Sehun grabbed some tissues from a box on the table and started wiping Luhan’s shirt where the tea spilled. It was still warm. Luhan must’ve been in scalding hot pain when the tea fell on him so why was he looking at Sehun with a smile on his face?

“You said my name,” Luhan said. “I thought…”

Sehun creased his brows, waiting for whatever Luhan was going to say but all he did was shake his head and continue to smile.

That smile was annoying and so was the distance they had in between each other. They were too close. So close that Sehun could actually see Luhan’s large brown eyes behind his large, thick glasses and how much his smile reached his eyes. It was pretty. Luhan was pretty… but, Eun Bi was prettier.

So, Sehun pulled his hand away from wiping Luhan’s shirt and placed a few centimeters of space between their bodies. “Did you burn yourself? You should check.”

Luhan shook his head. “It’s fine. Um, I’m going to go change. Wait here, okay?”

With that, Luhan quickly ran out of the living room, leaving Sehun alone. In the amount of time Sehun had before Luhan’s sisters came back with some more tea and pastries, Sehun decided. He was going to tell Luhan that the letter was a mistake once they were alone. Before things get funny and irreversible and before people got hurt, Sehun had to tell the truth.

As he listened to Luhan’s sisters tell stories about their brother, Sehun grabbed a brownie that Sunkyu proudly said she made and Sehun almost laughed but didn’t (to avoid looking crazy) because it was a Blondie.

 

Three hours, a text from his mother and a small quibble with Luhan over sending him home later, Sehun found himself walking the familiar road back to his house with a person who he could only describe as barely familiar.

The walk was quiet since neither Luhan nor Sehun struck up a conversation with one another but Sehun noticed things. Things he was better off not noticing because it was annoying his insides.

He noticed how Luhan tugged onto the hem of the sleeves of his long-sleeve shirt with clenched fists as he walked, he noticed Luhan tilting his head in a number of different directions while he walked, he noticed Luhan sometimes looking at the ground smiling to himself like a complete crazy person.

Such things wouldn’t annoy him usually, but to Sehun, on Luhan it was weird. It made him feel weird.

“Why are you smiling so much?” Sehun couldn’t help but asked.

Luhan tilted his head to Sehun’s direction. “Hmm, I don’t know. I’m just happy?”

“Why?” Sehun repeated but Luhan simply shrugged, hastening his steps.

Sehun watched Luhan’s back walking in front of him and he squinted his eyes to see if he could see something around Luhan. Something to make him understand. Luhan was weird. Cutting people off, cutting conversations short, wearing long-sleeve shirts even though it was warm. Luhan was just weird.

Sehun shook his head and caught up to the little blondie and continued their silent walk all the way to Sehun’s house.

“Thanks for walking me home,” Sehun said as he reached the steps of his house, then he remembered the letter. “Ah, I have to tell you something.”

Sehun looked straight to Luhan’s face. “That letter—”

“Ah! You want a reply now?” Luhan asked, his eyes widening behind the atrocious glasses he was sporting.

“No, that’s—”

“I do like you but I need to think about it some more. I mean, we haven’t really talked before so I just want to be friends for a while,” Luhan explained calmly.

“I’m not—”

“You can’t wait? Um, I guess I can give you something,” Luhan cut off again. Sehun was about to shout at this point but his voice got caught in his throat as he watched Luhan take off his glasses and tiptoe towards him and place a soft peck on his right cheek.

Sehun stayed rooted in front of his house for a while, even after Luhan left saying a loud ‘I’ll see you tomorrow!’ that the neighbours probably heard it.

A lot of things happened in the space of the three to four minutes he and Luhan were talking in front of his house. Sehun got a confession, then a partial rejection, then a kiss on the cheek. A cheek he was holding with the palm of his hand as if it were to fall off his face if he didn’t support it because that’s exactly how it felt. Sehun hated to admit it but the kiss singed his cheek more so than he could ever imagine and it felt like it was going to melt.

Luhan was affecting him. He’d known the guy for barely two days and everything in his head was getting messed up.

He needed to sort this out because he wanted Eun Bi to be the one to singe his cheek, not little blondie. He needed to admit to his mistake fast, even faster than Luhan can cut him off.

 

 

Sehun rang the doorbell.

He was in front of Luhan’s enormous house and he was resolute. He had decided that he would end this crazy whirlwind today.

“Oh! Sehun-ah. Here again? Can’t keep away from our little Luhannie?” Sunkyu said as she realized it was Sehun when she opened the door.

Sehun smiled softly, not wanting to flat out say ‘I came to explain to your brother that it’s not him that I like but a different person at school.’

Sunkyu yelled into the house, calling Luhan down and a few seconds later, Sehun was met with Luhan in the entranceway of the house.

“Missed me already?” Luhan asked with a giggle. “I’m kidding.”

Sehun suddenly felt hot. The memory of Luhan kissing his cheek engraved in his mind like a movie on replay. “Uh, are you busy today?”

Ugh, it sounds like I’m asking him out on a date.

Sehun could see Luhan biting his lower lip as he was thinking. “I have homework to do but I can spare some time for you.”

Sehun ignored the warmth his cheeks felt as Luhan said that he could spare time for him because why would he feel like smiling just cause of that? So, he pushed it out of his mind and took Luhan outside, simply taking a stroll around his neighbourhood.

“Where are we going?” Luhan asked about a few seconds into the walk.

“Where do you want to go?” Sehun asked, nearly smacking himself because that was not why he asked Luhan to go out. “No. Uh, look.”

Sehun stopped walking and Luhan followed suit. “About that letter. I—”

“It’s about the letter again? Do you want to know my answer so badly?” Luhan said with a little laugh.

Sehun shook his head. “No, it’s not that. I—”

“I liked it. Your letter. It looked like you put a lot of effort into it and it made me like you more,” Luhan said, his features softening. “’You may or may not know me, but I know you and I hope you’ll want to know me after this’. You’re quite a romantic, you know that?”

Sehun stared at Luhan for a while. Luhan was wearing an expression he’d never seen before. An expression of forced happiness.

“Hey…” Sehun began but was unsure of what to say because he was scared of what that expression meant. He wanted to know but didn’t want to know so he settled for “If you don’t want to answer me, it’s fine. Let’s get a cup of coffee or something.”

Sehun quickly walked in the direction of a nearby coffee house he saw on his way to Luhan’s neighbourhood, ignoring the feeling that Luhan might be hiding something.

 

 Coffee Shop (Saturday)

Luhan sat across from Sehun, sipping on some hot chocolate with extra cream and extra marshmallows while Sehun had a cup of chai latte.

“Excuse me, we’re having a promotion right now for couples so here’s a free brownie to share,” a waitress said, placing a plate of quite a generous piece of brownie on their table.

“But we… thanks,” Sehun said, too tired to deny free cakes. He looked at the piece of brownie on the table and then looked at Luhan who was munching on some marshmallows while smiling to Sehun.

Sehun sighed and pushed the plate of brownie to Luhan. “A blondie for a little blondie.”

“What?” Luhan said with his mouth still full, making Sehun frown.

“Finish chewing. It’s a blonde brownie, a blondie. Like you. So, a blondie for a little blondie. Eat up,” Sehun explained, gaining a smile from Luhan.

“Is that your nickname for me? Little blondie?” Luhan said after he swallowed his marshmallows with a small laugh. “It’s cute.”

Sehun drifted his attention back to his chai latte quickly, thinking about how nice it was and how lovely cinnamon smelled, instead of how much he liked Luhan’s little laughs.

 

Sehun’s House (Sunday)

Luhan wasn’t wearing his glasses. Sehun almost had a heart attack because Luhan was cute. He was incredibly cute without those hideous glasses but he was also frightening.

“Why are you not wearing your glasses?” Sehun asked quite angrily, making Luhan jump a little.

“I was doing some chores. Glasses keep slipping when I do them and it’s annoying so I use contacts,” Luhan explained, his fingers touching a side of his temple. “I look weird, don’t I?”

Sehun stared, really stared, at Luhan for a while. You do look weird.

“No, I was just surprised. You look good,” Sehun said nonchalantly, before inviting Luhan in his house for their ‘homework date’. Luhan had suggested, although not subtly, that they do their homework together and Sehun thought it was the perfect opportunity. Sehun was going to tell him once their homework was done. He had to. School was starting again tomorrow and he needed a fresh start with his letter to Eun Bi.

As they reached Sehun’s room, Luhan began unpacking all his books onto Sehun’s bed.

“Let’s start with Math,” Luhan said with a smile and Sehun noticed how much his eyes smile along with his lips. Sehun turned away and hummed in agreement. Luhan had weird large brown eyes, he had a weird smile, he was weird for comfortably chucking all his things on Sehun’s bed. Sehun quickly sat near his desk, waiting for Luhan to sit next to him when he heard Luhan call his name.

“What?” Sehun said, facing Luhan who was still standing near his bed.

“Do you hate it when I don’t wear glasses?” Luhan asked, forming two O’s with his thumb and index finger on both hands before placing it over his eyes. “Am I cuter like this?”

Sehun didn’t know what happened but he laughed. He laughed satisfyingly for a few good seconds before saying that Luhan looked ridiculous with his DIY glasses and both of them did their homework soon after, Sehun completely forgetting to mention the letter.

 

School (A week later)

This was the day. Sehun could feel it in his bones. It was the day he was finally going to come clean about the letter.

Despite how much he’s come to enjoy Luhan’s shenanigans over the past week they’ve (mainly Luhan sticking quite close to him) been hanging out, Sehun knew this was all a lie. He didn’t have a crush on Luhan even though the little blondie thought he did, he had a crush on Eun Bi. Eun Bi was the person he liked and he needed to tell Luhan that.

“Sehun!” he heard Luhan yell out from down the hall. Luhan was waving at him while running clumsily and Sehun noticed his shoelaces were undone.

He could really hurt himself, he thought and his body burst into action. He met Luhan halfway and he was glad he did because the boy nearly fell face first into the dirty school hallway if not for Sehun catching him mid-fall.

“Yah, you’re wearing contacts aren’t you? Can’t you see that your shoes are untied?” Sehun scolded, as he got Luhan back into a standing position.

Luhan pouted. “Sorry.”

Sehun felt his chest tighten seeing Luhan pout and now that he’s suddenly decided to wear contacts on a daily basis, he could even see Luhan’s eyes pouting too. Sehun groaned on the inside.

“Just be careful. Are you okay?” Sehun asked in a softer tone, gaining a small smile and a nod from Luhan. Luhan’s gaze shifted to where Sehun’s hand was lightly gripping his upper arm and Sehun quickly let go, feeling heat rush to the sides of his face.

Luhan grinned. “You’re getting handsy, Oh Sehun.” Sehun widened his eyes. “Kidding! Let’s have lunch!”

 

Shopping Mall (Weekend)

“Can we hold hands?” Luhan asked suddenly, making Sehun almost choke on the iced Frappuccino he was drinking.

“W-what?” Sehun asked nervously. The whole point of today was to make it clear that he didn’t have feelings for Luhan so why was this turning into another date? No, wait, scratch that. This wasn’t a date, there were never dates, they just met and talked and sometimes went to places. They weren’t dates. Besides, dates didn’t consist of needing to confess his letter wasn’t for Luhan.

Luhan held out his hand. “I want to try it… with you.”

Sehun’s heart was beating faster and he wanted to stomp his foot down like a child and say ‘no! Stop!’ because he didn’t want his heart to beat faster for Luhan. He didn’t want to feel happy when Luhan said he wanted to hold hands with him. He just wanted his love letter and Eun Bi.

But Sehun held Luhan’s hand anyway. Not because he liked him, of course not, but because Luhan asked, nicely. Nothing else.

Sehun was surprised at the softness of Luhan’s hand. It was small and soft and it intertwined well with his hand but he shook these thoughts aside. Thoughts like that were dangerous. It’ll lead him down something that he’ll regret and he didn’t want any regrets.

Sehun heard Luhan mumble something beside him and turned to face the little blondie but the sight was confusing. Beautiful but confusing.

Luhan was blushing. It was rather obvious from his pale, translucent skin. Sehun felt Luhan grip his hand tighter making him stop in his tracks.

Then Luhan said something that made Sehun more confused and wondering if he could stay in that dangerous path a little longer.

“I think… I really do like you, Oh Sehun.”

 

 

Luhan was like a big, bad natural disaster. The ones that come unexpectedly and take you off to some faraway land that’s foreign and scary like Oz. He was exactly like that.

At least to Sehun he was.

It had been nearly a month since the whole love letter blunder and Sehun was finding it harder and harder to admit to the mistake and even harder and harder to find reasons to admit to it. Instead, the letter was now turning into a reason just to see Luhan, rather than seeing Luhan for the sake of getting the letter back to give to Eun Bi.

He learned things about Luhan that he didn’t think he’d know since he was supposed to cut off all connections to the little blondie a while ago. But that obviously didn’t happen.

Instead, he learned that Luhan liked poems, he liked action movies, he blushed easily, he talked easily, he liked baggy shirts because they were comfortable, he liked tight jeans because they were easy to walk in and didn’t drag on the ground sweeping up dirt.

Luhan was a contradictory natural disaster.

At first, he was angry that he lost his perfect opportunity to confess to Eun Bi, but now, he was finding it difficult to even remember how he felt when he saw the girl. Eun Bi was right there. Sitting slightly far away from Sehun in their Physics class and Sehun knew he was staring. He used to do it often. Discreetly, of course, but still stared.

This time it was different, though. The little skip his heart did every time he took a glance at Eun Bi was gone, now he just felt like a normal human being with a normal heartbeat.

“Yah, people will really think you’re a stalker if you keep staring like that,” Chen said, sitting on the desk he and Sehun shared during Physics periods where they had to use the lab.

“Chen,” Sehun said seriously. “I think I’m over Eun Bi.”

Chen frowned at the tall brown-haired boy. “But you’ve been crushing on her since the beginning of the year. What changed your mind?”

Luhan. “Nothing. Just not that into her as I thought.” Sehun said.

“Liar. It’s that guy, isn’t it? Luhan,” Chen said.

Bingo. “No, of course not.”

Chen smacked Sehun’s arm causing him to wince in pain. “Liar. Am I your friend or what?”

Sehun laughed for a second before getting serious. “I think… I like him.”

“So obvious,” Chen simply said.

“You’re not even remotely surprised?” Sehun asked and Chen shook his head.

“It was funny that you kept looking for him everyday but never confessed about the letter. I kept thinking why would you prolong this situation unless… you liked the guy,” Chen explained with hand gestures. “Are you going to tell him about the letter?”

Sehun clenched his jaw at the thought. His pride for his letter was now replaced with a feeling that made him sick. Would Luhan forgive him? Would Luhan hate him? Just thinking about Luhan hating his guts was making him feel extra sick.

“So?” Chen asked. “You going to admit the truth?”

 

 

When Sehun finally made up his mind about telling the truth to Luhan, he was adamant that he had to admit the truth if he and Luhan were to progress any further but he felt rotten on the inside.

Now, they were sitting on a bench at Luhan’s backyard, enjoying the fresh rays that were creeping through the clouds of the mid-spring sky. Luhan was talking about how he used to have a dog named Cola and how he ran around the backyard before he ran away.

Sehun had to get this over with fast. If Luhan hated him, he had every right to hate him but he’ll try and gain his forgiveness. Sehun got up from the bench abruptly, stopping Luhan from telling him about how Cola used to want to climb up trees but couldn’t. “Luhan.”

Luhan looked up to Sehun’s face from where he was sitting with a smile. It was killing Sehun to do this. He was starting to have second thoughts but he clenched his fists. “About the letter…”

Sehun saw Luhan’s face fall and he quickly got out of the bench. “Oh, wow it’s almost dinner time. Do you want to stay for dinner? Soo-yeon noona is making something amazing. I’ll keep it a surprise. You’re going to—”

“Luhan,” Sehun said firmly. “That letter you got, it wasn’t—”

“Stop,” Luhan said, blinking rapidly at the ground.

“No, I have to tell you this. That letter wasn’t—”

“Stop!” Luhan yelled, his eyes widening in panic as he looked at Sehun. “Don’t say anything anymore.”

Sehun stood there, a scowl taking over his face because Luhan was doing it again. He was stopping him from saying something really important. But why? Why was he so… panicky all of a sudden?

“Luhan, why—”

“Let’s not see each other anymore,” Luhan said, turning away from Sehun. “I know. I know.” He kept saying, his voice cracking a little. “I know the letter wasn’t for me. I saw you putting it into Go Eun Bi’s locker slot.”

Sehun’s scowl softened for a second before his brows creased in confusion. “But you said…”

“I took it. You didn’t put it into the locker completely so… I took it. I’ve liked you for a long time but you never noticed me so… so I lied,” Luhan said, turning around slowly to meet Sehun. Sehun could see his eyes getting glassy and his shoulders getting tense but Luhan still smiled, but Sehun hated it. He hated that forced happy smile. “I’m sorry for lying to you. For making you hang out with me even though I knew you wished it was Eun Bi. I just wanted you to know me, I just wanted to know how it would be like if I was the one who your letter was for. I was wrong. I’m really sorry so… let’s stop here, okay?”

Sehun wanted to say no. He didn’t want to stop there. He really wanted to know more about Luhan and his life and his dog named Cola. He wanted Luhan.

Sehun could see Luhan’s lips quivering as he took a few steps forward to him, handing him a piece of paper he took out of his cardigan pocket. It was his letter.

“I didn’t lie when I said it was a pretty letter though. Eun Bi would like it,” Luhan said, biting on his lower lip as he looked down to the ground. “Goodbye, Sehun.”

 

 

Luhan felt every inch of his skin shiver in sadness as he turned around, biting down on his lower lip to stop himself from crying.

Just a little more. Endure a little more. You knew this would happen, didn’t you?

Luhan closed his eyes tight as he took a few slow steps forward, tugging extra hard on his cardigan sleeves that it would probably lose its shape.

All Luhan wanted was for Sehun to notice him. He was a dorky boy with large glasses with no friends but he was fine being alone, just watching Sehun from afar. Sehun was everything he liked. Tall, sociable, smart and nice. He was content with simply looking but then he saw Sehun placing a blue envelope into Eun Bi’s locker and he panicked.

Before he could understand what he was doing, he took the letter and read it. He read it and missed his English period that day because the letter made him cry. It made him cry because it was a wonderful letter filled with genuine feelings and it made him cry because he knew the letter wasn’t for him. It was for a pretty girl who was more in Sehun’s league than he was but it didn’t stop him from meeting with Sehun.

At first, it was to just return the letter. To say sorry for reading it, but then Sehun was waiting at the entrance gates of the school. He was waiting for Eun Bi and he looked nervous. Luhan’s insides tightened and it made him sick. He wanted it to be him, so he made it into him.

He was filled with so much happiness from the past month that he nearly forgot it was a charade on both their parts, his and Sehun’s. He pretended to be the clueless boy who thought someone confessed to him and was too dumb to see that the letter wasn’t really for him. He pretended and pretended, avoiding the conversation Luhan knew Sehun wanted to talk about the best he could through stupid jokes and aimless stories and comments because once Sehun said that it was all a lie, everything would disappear.

His smiles, his laughter, his time with Sehun would become nothing but a dream. That time came faster than he wanted it to because now he was walking away from Sehun, leaving behind the thing that managed to connect them. Luhan felt the tears roll down his cheeks and he was trying his hardest to stop his body from shaking and breaking down in front of Sehun.

It’s over now. Stop it. You did this to yourself so you have to deal with the pain, Luhan scolded himself. It’s really over now…

“You really think you could just end it like that, little blondie!”

Luhan stopped walking and turned around, surprised to see Sehun sprinting towards him.

“You…” Sehun said with a frown on his face and Luhan was bracing himself for the anger. “You, with your annoying smiles and constant ‘kidding!’, you with your constant clumsiness and randomness, you really think I’d let you off after you lied to me?”

Luhan looked down to the ground and saw Sehun’s shoes appear in his line of vision before he felt Sehun place his index finger under his chin and lifted his face up. “You…”

Luhan saw Sehun furrow his eyebrows before he became numb. He felt numb yet tingly because they were kissing. They were kissing and Luhan wanted to be the god of time at that moment and freeze everything because he loved it. He loved the kiss, the moment, he loved Sehun.

“I’m sorry,” Sehun said as he pulled away. “I also lied to you. To be honest, I think I kept putting off telling you because I already liked you a lot. Even before my brain realized it.”

Luhan didn’t want to blink. He wanted to remember this moment as it is but he was blinking. A lot. “ Y-you like…” Luhan pointed to himself.

Sehun nodded. “You with your smiles and constant bursts of ‘kidding!’, you with your baggy shirts and tight jeans, you with your habit of cutting people off when they’re talking, you with your letter stealing… I like all of you.”

Luhan was going to cry. He could feel it. It was a happy cry but it was a cry nonetheless and he didn’t want Sehun to see his waterworks so he hid in the fabric above Sehun’s shoulder and he felt Sehun wrap his arms around him.

“Does this mean you forgive me?” Sehun asked and Luhan nodded quickly into his shoulder, making Sehun laugh. “I don’t understand if you don’t tell me.”

Luhan reluctantly pulled away from Sehun’s now damp shoulder. “I forgive you. Do you…” Luhan pointed to himself again.

Sehun smiled and nodded. “I’m glad you took my letter,” Sehun lifted the letter in front of Luhan’s face and ripped it, gaining a smile from Luhan. “Remember that line you said from my letter?”

Luhan thought for a second. ‘You may or may not know me, but I know you and I hope you’ll want to know me after this’. Luhan nodded, remembering the line that resonated well with him.

Sehun placed another kiss on Luhan’s lips, making him feel warm shivers everywhere. “I definitely want to know you after this.”

Luhan grinned widely, unsure of how he was managing to keep his happiness from bursting all over the backyard but Luhan was content.

And Sehun was content.

Luhan was finally seen by the one he wanted.

And Sehun finally didn’t need that letter to be with the little blondie anymore. 

 

Author's Note: Thanks for reading all the way til the end! Please comment on my story and tell me how I did! What you liked and didn't like :) See you on my next oneshot (maybe).