Chapter 2
Impervious
Their university was large. The campus stretched across two ovals, taking one twenty minutes to walk the total diameter.
Yet, she saw him three times too many that day.
Once at the cafe, where he was sitting with the same girl that he he greeted in the morning, sipping coffee. Twice, standing outside the library, juggling a laptop and two books in his hands. Thrice, walking out of the business building and into the science building when she was exiting her lecture.
It would be easy to say that they passed each other without acknowledgement. That, each to their own, forgot about the seemingly meaningless encounter on the bus earlier that morning. But somehow, they were drawn to each other. When she looked up, he did too. When she was too shy to make eye contact, he moved himself so he was in her peripheral vision. When their eyes met, their gazes lingered.
This is was frightening. The connection that sparked between them was too complex to explain. It was too complex to put into words. Like north and south poles of a magnet, they were drawn to each other.
Maybe it was because he recognised that look in her eyes. She had the loneliest eyes he had ever seen. They intrigued him. Memorised him. He could stare into them forever, and yet he still would not be able to comprehend one shred of her thoughts.
Maybe it was because she recognised the spirit inside him. In a judgmental society, it took courage to smile at a stranger. To smile at someone who was on the brink of breaking apart. Maybe it was because she was one inch away from losing her grip on everything. And that smile brought her back. Brought her back one inch - but it was better than pushing her one inch forward into the deep abyss.
It scared them both. His instinct to protect her from harm and danger. Her instinct to be close to him and learn his courage, and to thank him. For all that he had done without ever doing anything.
She wondered how it felt. How it felt to inspire someone without ever seeing or speaking to them. To inspire someone, to give someone so much joy, without you knowing that they exist.
The world was a funny place.
She seemed to have forgotten of her despair, her hatred of hope, shortly after alighting the bus.
That day at lunch, she picked thoughtlessly at her food. Conversation was buzzing around her from people she ate lunch with. She was careful to keep them at an arm's length in case they judged her for what she felt. They were kind enough to allow her to sit wth them; polite enough to invite her to their events, but not caring enough to try and penetrate the concrete barrier she constructed around herself - but she wouldn't have it any other way.
Getting bored from staring at her food, she looked up at precisely the right moment and saw him. Sitting at a table across the crowded cafeteria, surrounded by a group of laughing friends.
He was staring right back her in a bashful way. When their eyes met, he turned bright red and looked away - coolly, of course. He looked like a deer caught in headlights. Stunned, and afraid.
This caused her heart to leap in her chest. Four times today, and counting, she thought. Was he watching her?
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