Serin was not at all sure why she’d agreed to go on another date. Sure, she liked Hoonmin well enough. The problem really was with the fact that it seemed too soon. He had asked, and it had felt so natural and right to be with him. To tell him yes. But now she was having second thoughts.

Arguing with herself as she tried to rationalize the decision, it wasn’t all that long before she gave up and decided to seek some outside advice. She called her baby brother, who was sensitive and more likely to have advice about her situation than her older brothers. He answered quickly, happily saying hello. “Hi noona!”

“Hey Jaehyun.”

“You sound a little down. What’s the matter?”

She smiled. He’d picked up on her worried tone instantly. That was exactly what she was hoping for. “I have a bit of a… thing going on with a guy.”

“A thing? Like a dating thing?” he asked, sounding quite curious.

“Well… no, but kind of. I don’t know. I’m not dating him. But I’m supposed to hang out with him again tonight, but I’m worried it’s too soon.”

“You might be moving on a little too quickly,” Jaehyun agreed. “Do you think you’re using him as a rebound?”

“I don’t think I am. Like… it’s not like I need this new guy. Or rather, I wasn’t looking for a replacement. He just sort of appeared, and I can’t get him out of my head. I’ve tried. I don’t know if I should pursue something because… well it’s more complicated than just it being so close to my breakup.”

“Serin,” Jaehyun said, cutting her off. “Do you like him? Like really like him?”

“I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about this, and I’m pretty sure I do.”

“If the bastard came back and said he wanted you back, would you leave and forget the new guy?”

“I don’t think so,” Serin answered honestly. “He’s very kind and likeable. And I’m drawn to him like I’ve never been drawn to anyone. I really can’t stop thinking about him.”

“It seems like you do actually like him. You’re just worried about what the situation might seem like to an outsider.”

“Yeah,” she agreed meekly.

“They don’t really matter, noona,” Jaehyun said seriously. “It’s none of their business. Just do what you feel is right. And don’t tell anyone if you don’t want to. Not everyone is entitled to know your business. Keeping a few secrets won’t hurt anyone too much. Follow your heart. You’ll go down the right path.”

“Thanks, Jaehyun. You’re the best little brother ever,” she told him kindly.

“I’m your only little brother. And I’m glad I can help. I hope things work out for the best for you. I really was upset when everything happened, and I’d be glad for you to find happiness again.”

“Thanks. I’m going to go then. I’ll talk to you later?”

“You’ll probably see me sooner. We’re supposed to have dinner with Dad in the next few days.”

“He hasn’t said anything to me yet, but thanks for the heads up. See you before long.”

“Yep. Later!”

He hadn’t really given her any actual advice, but something in what he had said stood out as important. She was worrying about what other people would think. But she was also a still worried about whether her feeling for him were because she felt alone after her breakup. It had been hard on her, her family, and she couldn't help but worry about whether or not he was her rebound. Was she using him to fill the void in her heart?

As much as she’d been debating it for the last month, and especially the last 18 hours, she was very much leaning toward no. He wasn’t. This was something way more than needing to be with a guy. In fact, she was quite independent. She didn’t need to be with a guy. She found it pleasant, but she didn’t need someone to fill the hole in her heart. It was just her coincidental meeting with Hoonmin had been far too close to her breakup. “You know,” Serin mused aloud to herself, “I might have broken up with Josh for Hoon.” And after she said it, she knew. She knew Hoon was absolutely not her rebound. She was very much attracted to him. But her feeling kept flip flopping back and forth, and so she made herself a promise to move slowly and not rush through things as she prepared for her date that evening.

--

Hoon met her in the same room at the same time. He had come alone tonight, Kiseop deciding to give him a bit of privacy. When he walked in to the small back room, her charming beauty once again astounded him. He would admit that she wasn’t quite as beautiful as the female celebrities he encountered, but there was just something about her. She was bright, happy, and energetic. There was a subtle cuteness about her and an equally subtle iness. She was serious and playful. Talented. He was so amazed at her as he walked in, that he forgot to speak.

“Ah, hi, Hoonmin,” she said as he entered.

He was drawn out of his reverie. “Oh. Hi, Serin. Sorry. I was lost in my own thoughts.”

She smiled at him warmly. “It’s okay. You’re here earlier than I thought you’d be.”

“Ah yeah,” he said. “We finished just a bit earlier today.” His heart was pounding in his chest, and he felt as though he was stumbling over his words. He hadn’t been quite this nervous in a long time, not around a girl, at least.

“Did you eat?” she asked.

“I haven’t… yet. I’m… really hungry,” he said, unsure.

“Okay, good,” she said, sighing in relief. “I brought us dinner so I was hoping you hadn’t.”

He felt so thankful for her consideration and felt as though his infatuation with her was validated. He wanted to know if she returned his feelings. He knew how he was. Once he started to like someone it was difficult to move on. He committed himself to them, and he was always the one who was broken up with. Hoon truly hoped she liked him back. But he felt it was soon to confess outright. Maybe she was still a bit hung up on her ex. In the mean time, he felt he should learn more about her. So while eating, he asked, “So other than music, what are you into?”

“Like my hobbies?” she clarified.

“Yeah. Like sports you like, and stuff you read for fun. What do you do for fun?”

“Hmm… I used to play basketball a lot.”

“Really?”

“Yep. I played in high school. And then I was on an intramural team while in university.”

“Are you good?” Hoon asked.

“I’m okay,” she said bashfully. “I was better among the Korean players. In the States… basketball is different. It’s played with a different level of passion. I went from being a tall player here to a short player there, and it was hard to adjust. But I managed somehow, and mostly just played for fun. I haven’t played in forever though. Thinking about it makes me a bit nostalgic.”

“You should come shoot with me sometime,” Hoon suggested.

She smiled at him kindly and said, “I will if I get the chance when you’re free.”

“So what else? I mean, you have to have other interests.”

She laughed. “I do. My main focus is work. I do spend a lot of free time writing music for myself. Just to stay in practice. I love it too much to stop even though I can’t do anything with it. “

“Well, you’re going to do a song for us.”

“I have to get inspired for it still. I want it to show off all of your colors well, and I don’t know you guys well enough yet,” Serin explained.

“Ah. That makes sense.” Hoon had been talking between bites of food, and had finally finished his dinnerl. “It was very good,” he told her. “Thank you for the meal.”

“It’s no problem.”

“So um… do you like manga?”

She gave him a curious look, raising an eyebrow because he'd brought it up so out of the blue. “I do.”

“Really? What do you like?” he asked excitedly.

“Mostly romance stuff, anymore. But I have a soft spot for Naruto.”

“Eh,” Hoon said, looking disinterested. “Naruto’s okay. One Piece is better.”

“You sound just like my brother,” Serin said, a bit displeased.

“Why?”

“He loves One Piece. He’s 26 years old, and every week when the new chapters are out, he just has to tell me all about why it’s better than Naruto. You’d have thought we’d have liked the same stuff after watching Dragon Ball together for all those years but… I guess I like a different type of story.”

“You watched Dragon Ball?” he asked excitedly.

“Yeah. Did you?”

“Of course! I loved it. Goku was my favorite character. I really wish I could do a Kamehameha!”

Serin smiled at him mischievously. “Goku’s alright. I always preferred Vegeta, though. Something about a character getting a shot at redemption seemed more interesting to me. But I did always like Goku’s pure hearted demeanor.”

“Well, that’s something we can agree on.”

Serin laughed, taking another shot, and finishing the bottle of soju she had ordered. “So that’s music, manga, and basketball. That’s pretty much it. I don’t really have much time for fun stuff. When I’m done with work, I come home and work some more, and if I’m inspired, I’ll write music.”

“I understand. You have to find time in between work to fit in the things you actually enjoy. Do you exercise?”

“Sometimes,” she admitted. “Not as much as I should, but I do try to eat right.”

“Well that’s at least something. And I was wondering since last night you mentioned it, why did you give up your dream of composing?”

She gave him a serious look, deciding whether or not she could tell him.

"If it's too painful, you don't have to tell me," he said, worried because of the look that was on her face.

She shook her head. “It's okay. I'll tell you now. I… my father and mother acquired a small company when I was just a child and dedicated their lives to expanding it and making it successful. They had plans to expand overseas. They were working hard for themselves, and they were supporting my brothers and me in pursuing our individual dreams. I was all set to go to a music college, and then, my mother died. It was sudden and tragic. She was in a car accident and died immediately. It was hard on all of us, but especially my father. Watching him struggle without my mother made me forfeit my dreams.”

He looked at her with a sense of awe. Because of how much she loved and respected her parent's vision for the future, she had given up what she wanted to do. To Hoon, who's parent's meant the world to him, it was a very admirable thing to do.

“Instead of studying music, I changed focus," she continued. "I started applying to business schools, and was accepted into a school near my grandparents' home that had a program for international business. I graduated a year and a half ago, and in that time, I’ve been helping my father expand globally like he and my mother wanted.”

Hoon sat quietly and absorbed the information for a bit. “You are a very considerate daughter. It must hurt sometimes to know that you gave up your dream for your parents'.”

Serin nodded, before saying, “It does. Sometimes. Just it felt right to honor my mother’s memory and effort and work in the company.”

“I really feel for you. I can’t imagine losing my mother or father.”

“It was nearly 7 years ago. Sometimes I’m more sensitive about it than others, but for the most part, I don’t mind talking about her. I loved her, and I really miss her, but it’s in the past now.”

Hoon saw her in new light when he thought about the hardship she must have endured, her mother dying and then giving up her dreams. He knew the pain of having to give up his dreams, after having an injury end his potential career in taekwondo. He would forever remain as a fourth degree black belt. He felt glad that he didn’t have to empathize with the pain of losing a parent though. He wasn’t sure he could bear it. “You’re very strong and admirable,” he told her.

“Thank you,” she whispered.

Hoon could tell that the conversation had reached its end. And though he’d no longer really had anything to talk to her about, he didn’t want to leave. He wanted, more than anything, to know that she returned his feelings. “Do you…” he started, before changing his mind and stopping halfway.

“’Do I’ what?”

“It’s nothing,” he said, embarrassed. “Forget that I asked.”

“You said you were leaving for Japan, right?” she said, changing the subject.

“Yeah. We leave in two days.”

“How long are you going to be away?” Serin asked, curious.

“A couple of months,” he told her. “We probably won’t be back for any length of time until February. A day or so here and there.”

“Oh… I see,” she said, sounding a bit disappointed. “I was hoping I’d get to see you more.” Her face flushed, and she covered with her hand. It was obvious that she hadn’t meant to say that.

“Serin-ssi,” Hoon said seriously. Realizing that he was going to be away for a while made him aware that he didn’t want to leave with certain questions unanswered. Steeling his resolve, he looked at her and finally confessed, “I know we’ve only met each other four times now, but I feel like I have to tell you this. I really like you. More than I can really explain.”

She looked at him, stunned. “I… feel the same,” she admitted after the initial shock wore off. “I can’t explain it, and I also feel like I shouldn’t. I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Why would you hurt me?” he asked calmly, though he was ecstatic on the inside.

“Because I still feel a little weighed down by my heartbreak from the breakup. I know I am attracted to you. I know I want to get to know you better and spend time with you. But I’m so worried that I’m using you as a rebound to make myself feel better,” she explained.

“Ah…”

“I really don’t want to hurt you. I don’t want to lead you on or cause you unnecessary heart ache.”

“Then don’t push me away,” he told her sincerely. “Keep in contact while I’m gone. We can talk and get closer while I’m away. And then when I get back, we can give dating a try.”

“Alright,” she agreed.

Hoon felt surprisingly comfortable after that, knowing that she did like him back and that she would wait for him to return. He supposed it was really the best solution. They could get closer to each other by communicating, but he would give her the space she obviously needed in order to finish healing. They sat and chatted for a while longer, before Hoon realized how late it was getting, and announced that he needed to go home so he could get some sleep.

“Can I… give you a hug?” she asked him cautiously, unsure of herself.

He didn’t give her an answer, instead walking up to her and wrapping his arms around her. He felt her arms against him in response, and he smiled wistfully because it felt right, even as his heart pounded wildly. They stood like that for a few moments, neither one quite sure what to do now. “Don’t forget to message me,” he told her as he finally pulled away from her.

“I won’t,” she promised.

He said goodbye, pulling on his hat and mask, and left, filled with excitement, but a bit of uncertainty. It was hard to say what the future would hold, but he hoped it would turn out for the best.