"I'm sorry but you have to provide proof that she isn't following the custody order." the lady on the phone told him.
He squeezed his eyes shut against the headache pounding in his head. "How?"
The lady sighed. "I'm not at liberty to provide legal advice. You'll have to talk to a custody lawyer and go through the proceedings with them."
He bit back a growl and swallowed. "Alright thank you." he said. Then he hung up without waiting for a reply from her.
Daehyun grabbed his laptop and searched for lawyers. He found one that seemed to come highly praised and called, knowing it would cost him a lot but not caring. Not if he could see his baby girl again.
He talked to the phone clerk about his situation and she started entering his information on the computer.
"I'm afraid he doesn't have an opening for a couple of months though with how many cases he's handling." this lady told him.
He sighed and closed his eyes once more, pinching the bridge of his nose.
She must have heard him sigh over the phone. "You'll need that time though." she told him. "If you don't have proof right now."
"How do I prove it?" he asked.
"Well you'll need to show that you are requesting your time."
"I can get my phone records to show how often I call her." he offered.
"That's not good enough. She could say that you only call to talk to her and never ask for your visitation." she said.
"Then what do I have to do?" he asked, willing to do whatever it takes.
"Write down the visitation request on paper and have it notarized so she can't say you didn't write it. Then mail it to her through certified mail so she has to sign for it." the lady instructed. "You could record your phone calls of you asking for visitation but she has to be aware that she is being recorded otherwise the judge won't use it."
Daehyun quickly jotted everything down. "I need to do this for a couple of months?"
"At least." she said. "Sometimes longer if there are legitimate reasons as to why she stopped the visitation."
"The first time was because her father was ill and she went visit him. But that was about three months ago."
The lady thoughtfully hummed. "Well if she is still there because he is seriously ill, it might be enough for a judge to dismiss your case."
He felt a little sick at that thought. "I don't know if she is or not." he confessed. "She stopped answering the phone."
"Make sure you do get the phone records so you can show them in court. Sometimes it helps."

Another three months went by without seeing Jaylie and then the court date arrived. They each had a lawyer that presented their cases. He had the notarized copies of letters he sent as well as the signed receipts from the post office. She had the hospital records of her father's terminal illness. The death certificate of her mother to prove she was the only relative there to help take care of him. And the request for a change in visitation. No longer every other weekend since it was too far of a drive and put too much burden on her. She offered the first weekend a month with alternate holidays until Jaylie was older. Then he would also have her for the summer when she wasn't in school. Not before then though because it was too hard on toddlers to be shuffled between houses. They needed a stable routine in order to grow up mentally healthy. The judge accepted.
"What do I do now?" he asked his lawyer once they were out of the court room. He didn't care that his voice cracked with panic or that his eyes were b with tears.
The lawyer offered him an apologetic smile. "We have to start all over now since there is a new custody agreement. I'll keep your record on file and you keep doing what you've been doing. Seeing as how it's only once a month though and with her father's illness, you'll have to show a significant amount of time without visitation. Even if she only gives you visitation every other month, she can use her father's illness as an excuse as to why it's not every month." Then he walked away.

A month went by. Then two. Then three. He kept up with the requests and she kept up with the excuses. He was able to talk to Jaylie one time on the phone. He asked what her favorite food was. Her favorite color. If she preferred cats or dogs. It was obvious to him though with the sound of her voice as she shyly answered. She didn't know who he was.


Daehyun's life became a routine. He worked everyday and often stayed late. There was nothing for him to go home to after all. When he did go home, he would have a quick, tasteless meal with a couple of beers. Then he'd go to bed and wake up early in the morning. Rinse and repeat.
One day he was out doing some shopping and just like before, he couldn't help but notice the happy parents with their own daughters. It seemed like every one of them looked like his Jaylie and he wondered how big she was now. If her face lit up when she smiled. How her laugh sounded. If her lips still moved when she was sleeping. Was she girly or boyish? How much of his personality did she have or was she like her mother?
Then he came to an abrupt halt when he saw one little girl through the crowd. He inhaled sharply as he looked at her and when he saw her holding the hand of his ex-wife, he knew for certain. Instantly he ran through the crowd, not caring how many people he pushed aside.
"Jaylie!" he called out and her head turned to look at him.
When he reached them, his ex glared at him but he only had eyes for the little girl with the pink hairbows. "Jaylie." he whispered again as he stared down at her in wonder.
"We have to go."
Daehyun finally looked up at his ex and she started to walk away, pulling Jaylie with her.
"Wait." he begged and she stopped. "Please... Just let me..." He kneeled down and turned his attention back to his daughter. "Jaylie. It's me. Daddy."
She didn't say anything though and instead hid behind her mother's legs, shying away from him.
"She doesn't even know who you are."
He glared up at the woman he use to love. "And whose fault is that?"
She merely rolled her eyes though and huffed, showing her obvious annoyance at being held up.
Jaylie peeked out then and looked at him. He smiled at her and a tiny, shy smile formed on her face.
"We're late."
Daehyun bit back a frustrated growl and then he remembered where they were. He stood back up and confronted the impatient woman. "Why are you here anyways? I thought you were living with your dad and taking care of him. That's why I can't see her."
"My husband is in town today for business. We're going back tonight." she retorted.
"Tonight?" he asked. "Let me take her for the day then."
She scoffed at him. "No! I'm not going to be cruel and do that to her. Force her to go with someone she doesn't know."
"She would know me if I actually got my visitation." he argued. Then he kneeled back down. "Do you want to spend the day with me? I'll buy you ice cream and toys." he bribed.
Jaylie looked at him curiously and then at her mother. She didn't say anything though and Daehyun debated with himself as to why she stayed silent. Was it because she was scared to tell him no? Or was it because she was scared to tell her mom yes? But it was true. She didn't know him...
"It doesn't matter. The answer is no. Come Jaylie." she ordered and took a step.
"Wait." he pleaded and took his phone out. "Let me have a picture at least."
She let out an annoyed sigh but stayed standing there.
"Smile." he told Jaylie and was rewarded with a small smile when he took the picture. Then he smiled at her in return, "I love you. Remember that, okay? I'll always love you."
Then his ex grabbed Jaylie's hand and started pulling her through the crowd.
Daehyun stared after them and felt his heart breaking once more. How many times can it break before it doesn't work anymore?
A pair of eyes turned back to look at him before the crowd blocked his sight. Then he was alone again. Surrounded by people going about their daily lives, giving him weird looks as he kneeled on the pavement and cried at his loneliness.
Forgetting about his shopping, he gloomily headed home. He fell on to the couch and cried some more. He sat there with his head in his hands for quite a while, not bothering to even eat. Even as the sun went down and it became dark, mirroring his life. Then he got up and dragged his body through the house they once shared together. When he reached the top of the stairs, he ignored the closed door and went into his bedroom. As he climbed in to bed, he was acutely aware of how quiet the house was. At one point in his life, he expected it to be full of children's laughter.

Just like she promised, he felt alone. His world was empty.