CHAPTER 5
The guy from apartment 512
"can you just admit that you like me already?" Kris puts a teasing smile, we are in the rooftop of the hospital. I was in suicide watch, so werent interely alone. "how can i admit something that you already know?"
Kris erase his teasing smile, and becomes serious. "i think it time for us to go back to the room" "can you kiss me?"
"Kyungsoo, come" Kris grabs my hands, and i bet he realize how cold they are. "please Kris, i want at least to know that someone here is going to miss me when i leave" "stop talking like that!"
Kris puts his hands in my shoulders, and shakes me. "your not going to die, and someone is going to kiss you, and love you!!" "how do you know?" Kris sighs, "because your a great guy Kyungsoo, you just have to see it"
"if im a great guy then how come you cant love me?"
"Kyu-" I stand up, i walk towards the cops, so they take me back to my room. "Kyungsoo wait!" I see Kris running towards me, i think his going to say more words that are nothing to me. But instead he kisses me. It was more that i thought it would be, it was sweet to me.
entry #67
Baekhyun. simple he is a tease. Even when he knows my feelings about Taemin, he continues to flirt with me. I didnt really hate it, since Baekyun has something that makes you like him. The thing i love about him, are his eyes. His laughter is not that far away from the list that i made of him.
1. eyes
2. laughter
3. voice
4. the wrinkle in his forehead when he smiles
I decide to go the bar again to meet Baekhyun. It was apart of me that want him to talk about Jongin, but at the same time i want it to get to know him better. The club was playing a song, that you have to do the shuffle. I move along the people, that are to bother with the dance than with me. I take the same table i did last time.
In no seconds Baekhyun takes the sit next to me. "you came" he says with a smile, i smile at him and i was blushing. I feel cheeks, and ears warm. "want to dance?" Baekhyun stands up, without waiting for me answer. I grab his hand and i stop him, "can we just talk" he sits again, he wasnt mad. "what do you want to talk about?"
"mmmm" i act like i was thinking, but im sure of what i want to say. "Jongin?" He chuckles, "Jongin?" I nod, "okay, Kyungsoo did Jongin made you come to look for me?" Baekhyun sound it hopeful. Did he still has feeling for him? "no, its just....."
"you talk alot about him? do you like him?"
I wave my hands, as i shake my head. "no, no i dont like him. I just get the feeling to talk about him all the time"
Baekhyun plays with my hair, somehow i feel the goodbye is coming. "Kyungsoo, your in love with Jongin..." I open my mouth to deny it, but he stops me. "i think is better not to see each other anymore" He smiles, and i see what Jongin was talking about. The wrinkle lines in his forehead. "i hope we would see each other someday" and he walks away.
Im back to my apartment, feeling worst than i ever did. I dont know if what Baekhyun said was true. I throw myself in the bed, i hit myself with the pillow. And it didnt hurt.
I take a big breath, before i lean over my drawer knowing exactly what im going to grab. I open it to the first pages, and i see a familiar name.
entry #5
Its being almost a week, and no one has welcome me to the building. I didnt expect flowers, or a party. Neither some random people from the building knocking my door giving me food, saying 'welcome'. But at least i expect it something, at least one single person to say 'welcome'. I guess movies lie. Since im not done packing, i decided to see around.
To get used to the stores, and restaurants that are around this area. Theres a store not to far from here, and its very lovely. Theres a young boy that works there, if i could guess his still in high. He said the words i was waiting for. 'welcome' and he smiles brighter than the sun for a moment. I smile back, and i said 'thank you'.
Although he doesnt know why, i said 'thank you' he just nods. I guess i said it more to myself than to him. We start it to talk, and the more he speaks the more i could see alittle of him in every word.
He told me his name, and i have to admit when i say his name out loud i get shy.
Sehun, Sehun, Sehun, Sehun, Sehun, Sehun, Sehun.
No the shyness still there.
Sehun. Im jealous of Sehun. So its true, i was in love with Jongin. Even when i havent talk to him in person, i was in love with the person who writes this thoughts. Now im trying to make Jongin two different people. Is Jongin in person, the same person in his journal? deep inside i want him to be like me. He was damage, just like me.
And yet look where he is, the life he has. I could've achive all of that, but instead i didnt. I couldnt. So knowing that Jongin did, its like we achive it together. I feel like i can die in peace.
I smile.
I put the journal back to my drawer, but suddenly my phone starts to ring. It was Jongin. "hello"
"hi, im just want to know if everything its okay" he sounds tired.
"yeah, everything its okay"
"well.." he takes a few seconds before he says more. "thats good to know, well i leave you to whatever you were doing"
"wait!" i shout. I hope i didnt scared him, or make him think im weird. "yeah?"
"can....we...talk?"
I can hear Jongin let go of his breath with a chuckle. "sure, what do you want to talk about?"
"what kind of job do you have?"
Jongin cleans his throat, like if he was going to explain his job to me. "i draw"
"you draw?" I raise my eyebrow, i would guess he be like a writer or something. "im a architecture" I push myself to sit down in the bed. "wow!" Jongin chuckle again, "yes, i draw buildings, bridges, those kinds of things"
"so what do you do?" now its my turn to answer, "im a teacher"
"a teacher?" Jongin's voice sound like he doesnt believe me. "a music teacher, people send me their symphonies and i try to fix them" "wow" now he was amaze of my job. Well at least i hope he is. "no wonder i hear music all the time" i chuckle, but it sounds different on me. Like im trying to hard. "well, it was nice talking to you, but i have to sleep since i have a meeting tomorrow"
"yes, of course"
"goodnight Kyungsoo" my name sounds lovely when he says it. It was like a rythem, that he could only make. Something like it was meant for him to call my name.
"goodnight Jongin"
Comments