Title (3/5):

Your title made me so curious. What were they escaping from? Who is behind all those trouble? What kind of drama will perk my interest? 

It was eye-catching at the same time, it wasn't. Escape. They would think of those questions above but they would actually click it because they got curious.

Appearance (3/5):

Dark-themed and mysterious. It was really nice and it explained at how the story is going to look like. 

Foreword/Description (8/10):

The description was nice. It plays a role to tell the readers what kind of plot you are going to do. And it literally means 'escape'. The character profiles were good too. You made them, it was uniform and it was really neat. The excerpt that you wrote below was really good too. It caught my eyes and I really wanted to check the story. 

Plot/Storyline (16/20):

The plot for me was really normal. It's about them being locked up in one huge and undestructible facility and they tried to get more members so that they could team up and escape. That's just basically it. But it was addicting to read because of how you wrote and described each and every situation.

I am the type of reader who is in for realistic events even though they have supernatural and fantasy genres which you brought out in your story. I clearly imagined everything little thing without your characters having supernatural powers. They would be like bunch of delinquents who were in some kind of major trouble and the facilitators wanted to drug them so that they could live a normal life like everyone. But they got sick of everything so they decided to escape.

The plot is amazing but it didn't really caught my attention. Addicting yes, but I got over it as soon as I finished it.

Character Development (26/30):

The way you explained the character's attitude was really an eye-opener for me. Luhan was the one who caught my attention. He was the all-knowing genius but was scarred by his past and tried to do it over again with absolutely no mistakes at all. It was breath-taking to see your characters come to life in your story and each and every one of them has balanced attention. It was a great and fresh start.

Use of Language / Mechanics (16/20):

"Ji- Sulli." He smiled but she wasn't, when it should be, "Ji- Sulli." He smiled but she didn't. (Chapter 1)

I think I got confused here. The reason why I used the word didn't, its because Sulli did not returned the favor, which is to smile back. 

When the boy was completely out of their sights did Sehun blink and broke his trance. (Chapter 2)

Now, this part was the one that caught me the most. Why did you put did in the middle? I had to read it all over again to completely understand it but I didn't get an answer. Can you please explain it to me? Because when you place did in the middle, it sounded like a question more than a statement. If I removed did, it would be more like:

When the boy was completely out of their sights, Sehun blinked and broke his trance. (Chapter 2)

"Yah! If you weren't being in trouble, then why did these two run away when they saw you." (Chapter 3)

You just need to put a question mark at the end of the sentence and you're good to go.

"You be careful too." when it should be, "You should be careful too."

I forgot what chapter this was but I placed should to put more emphasis on how important they are to one another. But it can also be:

"You, be careful too."

I placed a comma in between but it sounded more of an order than a caring plea.

Other than your mistakes up there, your vocabulary is breath-taking. It was nice to read. The way you placed difficult words and the words that is not used everyday with simpler words was a plus for me. The detailing was awesome too. You let your readers challenge themselves to imagine the place. Good job!

Flow (7/10):

It was steady but there were some parts where it was too fast. But you were able to sustain by using your words, I almost missed it, at how fast it became. You did a very great job on sustaining some parts and I really love how it progressed throughout your story.

Reader’s View / Enjoyment:

To tell you the truth, I absolutely love this genre. I love action, sci-fi, supernatural and fantasy. I love how you placed some scientific explaination in the story and I love science. _{It depends on the topic though.} The way you used your words to portray their feelings and how everything made sense really hooked me up. It was great and I really hope you'll do a greater job in your sequel. *Ohorat!*

Final Score: (81/100)

Additional Comments:

I clearly stated everything up there so I don't have anything to say. Since your story is complete and you're working on your sequel and pre-sequeal of your story, I just want to say that you'll do a great job like what you did here in your story. I was really envious of your writing style and I really wished it was mine. _LOL. I hope that you'll do a great job and produce more scientific explanations and add more fuel to the fire! By the way, if you think I have done a great job, how about an upvote for the shop to show your support and maybe spread the word?

Review Credit to Chunkee__ from ♪♫ Midnight Sonata Café ♫♪