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Where to start with my story, hmm... How about after I split from anyone else? I told everyone that I wanted to go and become a dance instructor in America but unfortunately for me, that didn't work out. They told me up front that I was amazing and unique, but they didn't want a reject from a washed up boy band. I guess they had a point. I quickly discovered that life was very different from being the celebrity I once was. I didn't know what to do so I went looking for someone who would be able to help me adjust to living a normal life. I decided to go find Minho, he had always been there for me and if no-one recognised us, we could be together... right? I guess being the young and naive boy that I was,I did some things I shouldn't have.Me going to find him was probably the biggest mistake of my life. Before I get a little ahead of myself, I did find him. I enjoyed being with him more than ever before, fans had forgotten us and no-one knew who we were. We could finally be an open couple and that thrilled me to bits, to finally go on proper dates and to be able to express my love openly was him was amazing. We bought a small house and settled down. He worked as a soccer coach at a high school and I worked as a bartender at S-Line, a popular strip club nearby.

Only after a few mere months, he began to distance himself from me. He became secretive and at first, I thought that he might be cheating but he wouldn't do that to me... would he? The last straw was on my twenty-fourth birthday, he stood me up at my favourite restaurant. I received a phone call just after midnight saying he had been arrested for drunkenly harassing a woman with a small child. When I got to the cell, He had never looked so pitiful but at the time, I couldn't feel sorry for him. I was so sick of all his excuses on why he was late to things, why he forgot to call me back and so forth. Being the selfish person I am, I told him that when he got himself out, he was to pack him and move on because I never wanted to see him again. I said the worse thing I could've ever uttered. The most heartbreaking words that I couldn't take back; I hate you. Those three words lingered in the air and I could almost see his heart breaking in front of me. Leaving in confusion at myself, I went home. That was the last time I ever saw him. As soon as I opened the door and saw the police men I knew something was wrong. It was a gut feeling and I was right, He had been in a car accident and without going through the mind numbing details, he was in a coma. When I got to the hospital, I sat by his bed for hours. Just watching, crying, apologising hoping he could hear my pitiful excuses. After a while, a nurse came in and gave me something, she said it was in his pocket at the time; It was my birthday present. It was a simple gold ring and in the note, it said:

I know we’ve had our up’s and down’s but I love you Taeminnie, with all my heart. I can’t imagine the rest of my life without you… Will you be mine forever?

I had never even considered…

On second thought, I wouldn’t like to go any deeper into that part of my life. I’m sorry, It hurts too much to recall, I had never cried so much in my life, all this pent up pain, regret and loneliness…

Anyway, I ran into former F(x) member, Sulli. She looked different, you could tell just by looking at her. She had a warm glow about her, she was now grown up, with a full figure and her hair was cut to sit just above her shoulders. The thing that was most surprised me was the child bundled in her arms. He looked only three years old with short, light brown hair, dark skin, brown eyes and he gave me a goofy smile. She named him Mun-Hee which seemed to fit this small child. When I asked her about who the father was, she said it didn’t matter but the kid reminded me of someone. We caught up and she told me that all her band was disbanded due to her surprise pregnancy and that no-one had known the reason of the bands’ disbandment except SM Town and F(x) so she told me she would like to keep it a secret. I respected her wish as it wasn’t my business to tell anyone anyway. I told her about Minho’s accident and she offered me to stay with her. I didn’t have anywhere to go so I accepted her offer. I couldn’t go home, that was ours and the thought of being there without him felt… wrong.

Hearing a pitta patta of feet on the old wooden floors, I blinked awake and was on alert as my door slid open. I slipped out from under my covers and quickly flicked my light on. In the doorway stood Mun-hee, he rubbed his eyes and looked up at me. The red circles around his eyes suggested me he had been crying. I moved quickly to him and swept him up in my arms.

“Mun-Hee, what’s the matter?” I asked him, pushing back his mop of unruly hair from his face.
“Appa… I had another nightmare.” His eyes became teary once again.
“What was it about this time?” I gently  began to rock his small form in my arms.
“The monster under the bed ate Umma and Appa and then came for me.”
“Oh Mun-Hee, there is no monster under the bed, I will show you.” I began to carry him down the hallway and led him into his small room. Placing him down, I approached his bed and peered under.

“Appa! Be careful.” He gripped my shirt tightly with his fist as I looked around. At the back I spotted his bunny he lost a couple of days ago. Reaching forward, I pulled it out and triumphantly showed Mun-Hee.

“Look! Your bunny must have fought it off.” I smiled and handed it to him.
“You found Onew!” He snatched the bear and cuddled it tightly.
“You named your new bunny, Onew?” I asked, feeling my chest tighten.
“Yep, he’s from that story Umma always tells me.” He smiled and played with it’s ears.
“Would you like to tell me the story before you go back to sleep.” I grinned. Why haven’t I heard of this story before. Maybe it’s new?
“Umm, ok. Once there was bunny who lived in the forest named Onew. He was a soft, fluffy bunny with a big heart. He had many wonderful friends; there was Key the fox, Jong the dog, Min the frog and Tae the beaver. They love to put on shows together for the other forest friends and slowly the friends began to fall in love. Jong and Key were first followed carefully by Tae and Min but that meant leaving Onew all alone. This broke his heart but he still loved his fellow friends so much so he stayed with them. He continued to lead and support them until one by one, they left him all alone. Although Onew felt alone, he still had one who loved him so very much-“
“Taemin-ah, is that you?” I heard Sulli’s footstep’s hurrying down the hall to Mun-Hee’s bedroom.
“Good night. You can finish telling me the story tomorrow, yes?” I quickly lifted him to his bed and kissed his head before slipping from the room.
“Yeah.” I gave a short reply, stepping into the hallway, shutting the door behind me.
“What a night.” She stumbled in stinking of alcohol, her body covered in glitter and make-up thickly layered. I suppose that being a stripper at a cheap club will do that to you.
“I imagine, many tips?” I asked as I moved over to help unlace her bodice.
“Not really, that sleazy business group from last week came back.” She spat, pulling her stockings off.
“That’s . Hey, quick question… what was with the story you told Mun-Hee?” I followed her down the hall as she continued stripping.
“Why was Mun-Hee awake?” She turned to look at me quickly before searching her closet for something comfortable to wear to bed.
“He had a nightmare, why are you avoiding my question?” I snapped.
“Look Tae, I don’t even know what story you are referring to ok? I’m really tired and just want to sleep.”
“The one about a bunny called Onew.” I watched as she dropped what she was holding and looked over at me sheepishly.
“Oh, you heard about that one…”
“Yeah I did, why would you make up a story like that? Let alone, why would you tell a story like that to your son?” I barked.
“It’s pretty accurate don’t you think though? All of you fell in love, leaving Jinki all alone.” She snapped.
“How dare you! You don’t even know the half of it, you don’t know our leader like we did.” My chest tightened as I thought back of the once happy life I once led.
“Maybe not, but any idiot could see that your leader was jealous of what you guys shared.”
“He loved us.” I fought back.
“I’m not denying that, but I could tell he wanted what you had, He wanted his other half, his Minho.” She spoke quietly.

I couldn’t believe she could dare question the relationship we had once shared with our leader. Was he really that lonely? I never really thought about it and hated that she pointed out what was in front of me all along.

“Taemin, I’m sorry, I just-“ She reached out to touch me but I brushed her hair away.
“Don’t, please don’t. I will just sleep on the couch tonight.” I muttered, heading to the bed snatching up my pillow and sheets.
“Tae, don’t be like that.” She pleaded.
“Please, just let me be.” I slammed the bedroom door behind me and headed to the couch.

How is it now after all this time, I realised only now that our former leader was lonely. Now that I think about it, he would have felt left out. All of us pairing off and leaving him alone. Our silly, lovable dubu leader…I fell asleep thinking of our beautiful, lonesome Lee Jinki...

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A/N: I'm sorry it's been so long... (please don't throw things ><) I hoped you liked this insight on Taemin's life. I didn't touch much on Minho but it will expand in the later chapters. I also thought it was time for one of the SHINee members to realise how lonely their leader must have been during their SHINee days. Anyway, next is... I don't know... why dont you lovely readers tell me who you want to hear about next. Love you all, tll next time~ banana-,milk-unni