A/N: I know alot of you skip over the author note but today it is important you read it <3 I just wanted to say I'm sorry for being away for so long and still having the support of my loyal subcribers :) I love you all and want to thank you. Though I am a little sad that I lost half of my subcribers, I'm going to try and win them back :D I'm sorry if it's a little off... I need to reconnect with this story :) Anyways... hope you enjoy ^-^

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If you’re going to make me talk about it, I suppose I will. You know what happened when I left SHINee? I became a manager in Japan like I told everyone I would; I was put in charge of a new rookie group by the name of “Your Juliette”. Ironic, right? Anyway, the girls were beautiful as all idols were, their names are; Sun, Way, Nicole, Min, Ji Yang and Tamara.  Each of the girls were very specially skilled and they actually remind me of how we used to be. SHINee I mean. I began to miss the boys terribly after only five short months. But they left me alone. I was left alone in a place that isn’t my home. Home had been taken away from me ten years ago when we took a final bow on stage. My family had abandoned me in this place, had completely forgotten me although I hadn’t forgotten them, I mean, who wouldn’t? Not the Flaming Charisma, Minho, The Bling Bling, Jonghyun, The Almighty Diva, Key and The Maknae, Taemin, but the ones without make-up and shining lights with thousands of Shawols screaming their names. What I miss most is the real boys; Lee Taemin, the hard worker with a lot of passion and aegyo, the one who in the debut days taught me how to dance. Choi Minho, the man with a lot of feelings and misguided love, the one who I could look up to, to be more sociable and charismatic. Kim Jonghyun, the young boy with a lot of fire and ambition to help me guide the group to be the best they could be and finally, Kim Kibum. I could never admit it to myself or anyone else but I always had special consideration and love for Kibum. He was different, so beautiful inside and out with a stylish flare about him that made him shine. It was just my luck that from the moment I saw Jonghyun and Kibum together, I knew those two were meant to be. I could never of had the young diva, it wasn’t my place. I wasn’t to fall in love with my team, I’m the leader… I was supposed to love them all equally and protect them.  I missed all the nagging, laughing, yelling and my absolutely favourite thing…. It was when I could hear the soft snores of each member (Except for Jonghyun who sounded like a dinosaur in his sleep). It let me know that everything was ok and that we had lasted another day in the tough life of idols. But after all that care and love I gave them, I was left alone. I heard news about them every day but then the fans and newspapers stopped caring. I lost them. I tried contacting the boys’ after a year but how could I? All I had to go on was what they told me before they left and I tried to follow that small string but it led me to dead ends. I didn’t have a phone number, a location and their families wouldn’t tell me for god knows why. Years began to pass and in the end, I gave my search up. How was I going to find boys who no longer existed?

“Jinki-ah… will you be home for dinner tonight?” Her soft voice asked. I sighed rubbing my temples knowing yet again I would have to let her down.
“No… I have work to do. The girls have a concert coming up and I need to complete the paperwork.” I responded.
“But Jinki, you promised-“ She began.
“Don’t give me that Jessica. I have to work hard to pay our bills. Arraso?” I snapped.
“Arraso. I’ll see you tomorrow.” She replied, her tone almost mechanical, I would have to fix that tomorrow.
“See you later sweetie.” I tried but all I heard was silence. Hanging up, I slid the phone into my suit and took a look over at the girls who were huddled together, discussing something excitingly.

“Manager Lee-Oppa! Everything ok?” Sun, the youngest member asked. Her constant concern and motherness made her a seem a lot older than her title of the ‘Maknae’.
“Everything’s fine Sun… get ready to go back to practice in 5 minutes girls.” I clapped my hands together.
“Uh… Oppa… We were wondering… if…” Ji Yang began to nervously twiddle her thumbs, looking everywhere else but my eyes.
“If we could please go out tonight. Instead of practice.” Tamara gave her a small pat on the back.
“N-“ I began.
“Before you say no Manager Lee can I just tell you that we have worked so hard for tomorrows’ concert and all we are asking for is a little fun? Please?” The leader, Way, swooped in giving me wide puppy dog eyes.
“No girls. I am on strict orders to make you practice and then see you all to bed.” I my heel to walk away when Nicole grabbed my arm. I whipped around, giving her a cold glare. She bowed but didn’t let go of my jacket.
“Please…Oppa? Didn’t you used to go out with your band mates? Didn’t you have fun?” She pleaded.

For that split moment, my frozen heart melted. I remembered all the fun times I went out with SHINee and all the other SM trainees. I shook my head, resuming my cold exterior.

“My final answer is no. Back to the training room.” I ordered.
“Fine.” She let go of my arm, stomped her foot and marched back to her defeated looking band members. I watched them all file in before heading to my office to do some paper work. What do they think this is… a vacation? They try so hard to become the best of the best but then they decide to go out and party? Pfft… I rested my head in my hands closing my eyes for a moment. I had been so tired recently, I suppose it was the stress. Being manager was a lot harder than I imagined. I am constantly filling out paperwork for interviews, concerts, talk-shows… it’s so stressful. I just need a rest… for one moment.