I cupped my hands around the warm mug as I snuggled closer to him. Zhang Yixing or better known as Lay. As he cuddled me closer to him, I sniffed and got a whiff of his perfume. The perfume that I bought for him for the first time I celebrated his birthday together with him.

We were still friends back then. When he kept coming to my little, humble flower shop every month. A bouquet of roses every single time. His favourite flower. His and his mother’s. For his mother who had already passed away from cancer.

We made friends with each other since then, and keep hanging out together. He found out our lives were quite similar. My mother was suffering from malaria and I had to support our family, consisting of mother, my little sister and me. Dad, I don’t even think I have one, left us when Rae Hee was 10 old. I was 15.

When he left us, mother was okay. She was still strong and healthy for 4 years. I volunteered to work part-time as well. But when I was 19 – the age where I finally got enough money to open my own flower shop – she fell sick. Deadly weak. I finally did what I as a poor girl dreamed of. Owning a flower shop.

But after six months of opening Fresh Blooms, she lost the battle. For Rae Hee’s sake I stayed strong. For my sake I go on with my business. Then Yixing saw my shop. And then he became a regular customer. Then we became friends.

He came from a rich family. I was raised in the Brokedown area. His family treats him like an employee. Mine treats me like I’m royalty. He don’t get kisses from his mother. I got showered with love wherever I was. We are different in a sense. But we are still the same. We click. We match. We fit.

We strolled through the mall. I tugged at his shirt when something caught my eye. A unicorn plush toy. I love unicorns. I still do even though I’m already 21. It’s not wrong to love unicorns until this age. This ‘mature’ age.

“You want that? Sure, I’ll get it for you!”

I tried to stop him. As what I wanted was just to inspect it closer. I hate it when he used his money for me. It just didn’t feel right. Like I was using him which I do not want. Ever. I love him for him. Not for his riches.

“Yi Xing! Yi Xing! I don’t want it – ”

Somebody suddenly covered my mouth and pulled me away. I watched myself getting dragged to a karaoke room. I got pretty confused by then. When the person finally released me, I turned to see a frowning Kris with a smirking Kai next to him. I rolled my eyes and caught a glimpse of another derp. Chanyeol.

“Just. Show yourself you . I already saw you.”

He came out grinning like a derp he was.

“ GUYS. Lay is going to think I’m kidnapped – well I am but…”

Kai chuckled.

“Noona, relax. He was the one who planned for this anyway. You are not supposed to see the surprise yet.”

I widened my eyes in shock and looked down at my watch. What anniversary can this time be? Its not our monthsary, not our anniversary. Oh, today was the day ( 19 October ) we first kissed. I giggled. He could remember every little thing.

Kris’s POV

I looked at her grinning and giggling to herself. If only she knew about Lay having… I shook my head. As I looked at her again, my heart was drooping with guilt.

“When I’m gone, you’ll take care of her alright?”

I bit my lip. Guilt was trying to devour me. My chest tightened and I looked away. Yes I will Lay. How could I not?

Kris’s POV ends

I looked up to see 3 frowning faces drilling their eyes on me. I backed away, feeling kind of scared.

“Why were you laughing to yourself? Weirdass creepy girl. Why does Lay hyung even want to hook up with you,” Kai smirked.

I rolled my eyes away and took a seat beside Chanyeol. He placed an arm around me and winked at me before grinning at the other two boys. I snorted and Chanyeol’s smile faltered. Kai kept his tiny smirk when Kris… had his poker face on like always. I pulled Kris hand to make him sit next to me before Kai did. Kai’s smirk was lost when his lips were set in a thin line. I mockingly stuck out my tongue and looked away. After 1 hour of singing and horrible covers, we emptied the room laughing like crazy.

“So, hyung, where are we going now?” Kai asked, looking at Kris expectantly.

Kris bit his lip, something that I realised was getting often. I looked at Kris worrisomely, wondering what was wrong.

Kris’s POV

I felt a pair of eyes were staring at me and I looked to my right. I looked down at the girl who was shorter than me by a head. I raised a brow and she immediately looked away while shaking her head fiercely. I shrugged. There was a look of…worry? In her eyes? My lips twitched a little and the sides of my mouth went upwards. She care about me. Suddenly my insides were all warm and fuzzy and my heart was beating faster.

What. Is. Happening? Suddenly Chanyeol nudged me.

“The cool, composed daddy seems… bubbly. Like a wine. Champagne,” he whispered, chuckling.

I glared daggers at him. I immediately sensed that Kai was missing and I grabbed the nearest shoulder. Her.

“Where. Is. Kai?”

She looked fearsome but my worry overcame my soft spot and shook her a little. She pointed to the arcade. I immediately dashed to the arcade.

Chanyeol’s POV

I gulped. I just can’t believe what I saw. Kris giving her the cold shoulder and being mean? I scooped her hands and squeezed it. She looked at me with sad innocent puppy eyes. I ruffled her hair and gently tugged her to follow me to the arcade.

She suddenly pointed to a familiar-looking guy. Taemin. I smiled – grinned – whatever. Kai was laughing along with Taemin while Kris was leaning on the wall acting like nothing had happened. I left the hold on her hand and stomped to kris and harshly gripped his hands. I dragged him away, far from her eyes and ears before confronting him.

“Did you know you probably just hurt her? Did you!? DID YOU!? How could you do that to the person who has your heart?”

“WELL WHY SHOULD I CARE!? SHE DOESN’T LOVE ME BACK! Tell me why should I care for her when she doesn’t for me?” Kris burst and suddenly shut up.

His guilty face appeared.

“Wait, she do care about me…”

“Good thing you know that.”

“She cares about the whole EXO okay?”

“But you were the one other than lay that had gotten the most attention from her!’

Silence filled. The air around us was snappy. Intense.

“Erm guys whats wrong? Why are you staring down at each other? Let’s go and find Lay,” she interrupted, looking anxious.

Oh god. True enough. My heart also felt uneasy.

“Where are you? At the beach? Everything is all ready? Okay. We’ll be there ASAP.”

Kris gestured to us to get going.

Chanyeol’s POV ends

“You did this… all for me? I… love you so much,” I gasped.

The beach was…It so beautiful that the word beautiful can’t even really describe it. It was precious.

I enjoyed the private moment with Yixing. It was the most wonderful anniversary gift one could have. When it was ten, he drove me back home and my sister was already dead to the world. A goodbye kiss and he left.

I tried calling him times and times again. But… he hadn’t answered any of my calls. I texted him probably 100 times already, but he still hadn’t replied back. I got worried. I starting calling up the others and none answered. None except for Kris. He answered the call immediately after the first ring.

“Why is Lay not talking to me?”

“There was a heated argument between him and his father yesterday about you. He decided that you try to survive two days without him. Try not to talk or also think about him. Okay? Its his orders.”

He put the phone down and I leaned on the wall for support. Well, I will do what Yixing asked me to do. For his sake. I managed a little smile and get on to my workplace.

For the whole day I tried very hard not to think much about him or talk about him. I succeeded with only thinking about him for a few times.

The second day passed and I was finally relieved that the torture was over. I decided to surprise Yixing by going to his house. His apartment where he lived alone. When I arrived though, my heart shattered into a million pieces like glass.

I picked up the little post-it.

“Not such of a surprise huh?

 I knew you were going to come here after your trial.

 I know you too well.

I have something to tell you.

I should have told you before.

I had cancer.

I wasn’t going to live long.

I didn’t tell you as I…

Well I thought you’ll be…y’know upset?

It will burden you.

You survived the two days right?

Well, you can do it for the rest of your life then...

For me.

For you.

And for your sister.

You see those wrapped presents?

Yeah I tagged them with a year.

They are your birthday presents.

Don’t open them the year you aren’t supposed to okay?

I am watching you!

And the little envelope?

 They are filled with rules you must follow.

 Each is labelled by a month.

Follow them. I AM WATCHING.

You and your sister are going to live in this apartment from now on.

Baby, don’t cry. I will always look upon you from the heavens.

I will always be in your heart.

I will guide you.

I am always by your side.

Life goes on.

Love,

Zhang Yixing.

I dropped the post-it and fell to my knees. He died. Oh god. My eyes traveled to a rose on the table. Roses, no matter how beautiful it is, has its own thorns. Love, no matter how wonderful it is, it can be destroyed. I held the rose too tight and blood began to appear.

Suddenly the front door open, revealing 11 boys before me. Kris rushed to my side and hugged me tight. It just made me cry harder. The boys had puffy red eyes too.

“When did he die?”

“Just an hour ago.”

I bit my lip and started slapping my thigh. Kris snatched my hand and bring my head close to his. Our foreheads touched.

“No, don’t. And please release your tight grip of that rose. The thorns are injuring your hand. As what Yixing say, life goes on. He don’t want to see you like this. You don’t want him sad in heaven don't you?”

I shook my head and he hugged me tighter.

I will stay strong Yixing. I will for the sake of us.

Kris’s POV

Lay, I will protect her.

I wont let her suffer.

I won’t.

Epilogue

7 October

It had been almost a year since I last visited him. It was devastating. And to live in the apartment filled with his memories and him. I told the boys it made me feel like I don’t need to visit him.

But I knew it was just an excuse. I am not ready. I wasn’t brave enough. Until today. I knew I just had to go with Kris to visit his grave. As I sat quietly watching the view sailed past in his car, a tear formed on my eyes.

“We’re here.”

As I dragged myself to where he was, I tried to pull myself together. I placed the rose I had brought and I dropped to my knees and the dam that was holding back tears broke.

“Let’s go…Happy Birthday Lay. We all miss you… Goodbye for now…”

He dropped me off. I slowly opened the door to my home. It was quiet. My sister was out. I went to my bedroom and my heart quickened.

A rose, without thorns, was on the middle of my bed.

“I Love You – From Heavens”

My world blackened and I fainted.

THE END