Hiraeth (n.) - a homesickness for a home to which you cannot return, a home which maybe never was

BAEKHYUN2006&2014

Kyungsoo. He was my best friend. Jealousy got the best of him, but my pride controlled me. It made me helpless and I wasn't able to feel Kyungsoo's pain. It all started in high school. 

Kyungsoo was a transfer student. And because of this, he became the newest target for the bullies. Every single day, he either had mud stains on his uniform or some kind of grit resting in his hair. 

He looked so poor and dirty. People looked down on him, but he remained silent. He never resisted nor fought back. He was scared. 

The day I found him, was a miracle to him. I had finished eating my lunch and went outside to throw my garbage to the giant garbage can. And there, I found him, unconscious.

I panicked. I heaved him and carried him to the school's clinic. 

His eyes fluttered open, and he rubbed his head in pain, "Whe-where am I?" He looked around. "You're in the clinic, Kyungsoo. I'm glad you're okay. I'll be heading to class now. Please, rest and get well soon." I said to him as I stood up.

He grabbed my arm, "Stay. Please. I'm lonely." I had a mental fight with myself and I eventually gave in, "Okay."

He started talking to me, saying stuff that were maybe too private. He has depression. At home, he felt safe; but in the outside world, he's helpless and weak. It was like he was a punching bag in a boxer's training center. 

He has never told anyone about his problems. He was scared that his family might worry about him. He didn't want to be a burden. He said that I was the first one. Ever.

And I asked, "Why me?" He thought for an answer, and simply blurted out, "Because you saved me. Because you looked at me with pity, not with disgust."

Kyungsoo lived an awful life, if I wer