Childish.  Immature.  Naive.

Minseok had worked all his life to free himself of such labels and now here he was, trapped like a ghost in a near exact replica of the grand library he once frequented.  It was a new life he had begun living, an escape from the reality he never wanted, and a potential solution to the conflict he's been fighting for years.  It was a placebo, a pretend world where he could dwell day in and day out, reminiscing of the days he used to enjoy but now only cause him grief to think about.

Having once been admired for his fair skin, his soft features, his bright and dazzling smile, holing himself away in a dark library was definitely a change.  He no longer had the soft, plump cheeks that had once been his signature look.  He combed his hair over the scars he'd acquired since the last person he knew from his last life saw him.  Now, rather than being the sociable, friendly person he used to be, his head is bent down, listlessly flipping through the books he blew his inheritance and savings on in a unknown town filled with strangers.  Frankly, there was no other thing he had left worth living for other than tending to this replica of the library he had made so many fond memories in during his better years.

Luhan.  The person of all of his joys and sadnesses.  The two of them had spent hours together, at school, at home, everywhere.  They were the best of friends for years, studying and rooming together wherever they went.  The first sign something was going wrong in their relationship started in the quiet library they sought refuge in from the harsh demands of their work.

"I want to move out." said Luhan.  "We're not kids anymore so I don't see the point in buddying up everywhere we go anyway."
"True..." Minseok hesitantly admitted.  It always hurt to think that Luhan only ever thought of him as a loyal buddy.
"We went different paths when we made our career choices.  I don't think there's anything left for either us to gain from living together anymore."
Minseok swallowed his urge to throw a fit and make Luhan stay.  He always hated being called "childish" and "immature".  The last thing he wanted to do if he wanted to shed that part of his identity was prove all those people right by throwing a tantrum in public.
Reluctantly, Minseok agreed and later helped his friend pack.  The sudden change was definitely not welcomed.

Since that day, the two saw less and less of each other.  Minseok couldn't express how progressively bored and lonely he was as they continued to drift apart.  Hanging out with all of his other friends was just not the same without Luhan.
"He has his own life to worry about." he'd tell himself every time the other turns down an invitation to a reunion or fails to show up.
He slowly came to realize he only ever had eyes for Luhan.  Before, when they were always together, everything would seem wonderful.  Now Minseok realized that his world isn't nearly as pretty and happy as he had though it was.  Obviously, it must have been Luhan, the person that had never failed to brighten his day, right?

Minseok grew persistent, relying on that old irresistible charm of his to become closer with the other again.  Even though he was a man in his mid 20's, he wasn't afraid to pull out all of the disgustingly sweet and adorable tricks the youngest of children used to get their way.  And for a while, it seemed to work.
Luhan made more time in his life to fit in Minseok.  As opposed as Minseok was on the inside to meeting all of Luhan's new friends and acquaintances, he knew this would allow him to be with his old friend more and so he accepted the change.  It almost was back to the way things were before.  He didn't know if he was imagining it or if he was just that happy that the two of them were reunited again, but it seemed that the two of them were closer than ever, even if they didn't spend as much time together as they once did.
His confidence soared.  He had revived his and Luhan's dying friendship, which at first seemed like an impossibility.  If he could make it last forever, he would be able to die happy.  Minseok had to hold himself back from acting too fast though.  Baby steps, or else he may risk losing his friend again.

But then everything changed.

"Will you be my best man?" Luhan asked out of the blue one day.
"W-Wait, you're getting married?" Minseok inquired.
Luhan nodded sheepishly and smiled as he slung his arm over Minseok's shoulders, flashing the shiny diamonds embedded in the ring on his hand.  "Yeah, she and I have been going out since shortly after I moved out. I kept it secret from you cause you were so clingy back then, but you seem in control enough with your own life now." he admitted. "So how about it?  Best man?"
Usually, Minseok would be inwardly elated at the skinship Luhan initiated, but today, his mind just went blank.  It stung.  Going out?  Secrets?  Clingy?  Best man?  All these things coming at him at once made his head hurt.  He felt his throat start to go dry and he wondered if he could bring himself to say yes for the sake of his friend.
"Haha, do you think I'd say no?" Minseok chirped out, donning his brightest, false smile. It hurt, but this was how life was. Unfair. He was naive to think it'd go his way. It hurt so much, even without him mentally beating himself over it.
"Of course not, but I can't just not ask!" Luhan grinned, revealing those crooked lower front teeth that Minseok had loved for so long.  It saddened him to know he lost the chance to have that smile to himself.

The day of the wedding, he expertly played the role of best man, arriving exactly on time,  giving a perfectly worded speech, and made sure everything was arranged for, including a limo.  The only thing that went wrong was the graceful bride's clumsy tendencies.
During the reception, Minseok was sent out to buy a new pair of pantyhose for the bride since the current ones she was wearing caught on the rough edge of a chair and ripped.  Unfortunately, because they chose a scenic, isolated location for the reception, the nearest place he could purchase any tights was a good few miles away.  Of course, being a male, he knew nothing about such things and so he had to consult with the newlywed couple back and forth over the phone.  Technically, he could have relied one of the bridesmaids to take care of this embarrassing task, but that would be both ungentlemanly and not impress Luhan.  It took a full 10 minutes before a pair of tights was finally decided on and he could hail a taxi to take him back.  As soon as he successfully got the attention of one and seated himself in the back, he told the driver to go as fast as he could back to the reception hall.  Minseok just wanted this day to hurry up and end.

The route was indeed scenic.  The sun coming through the windows from between the treetops was warm and the smooth ride around the winding road up a hill was slowly putting him to sleep.  He rolled the window down and put his head directly in the flow of the wind, hoping a breath of fresh air could both wake him up and brighten his mood again in time for when he'd have to face Luhan. As a result, he couldn't hear the driver's panicked curses over the roar of the wind as the brakes malfunctioned.  Only when the car swerved as the taxi tried to avoid the railing could he hear the screeching of the car wheels and the sharp clang of metal on metal as the cab crashed.  The world started to tilt and flip over, and tree branches and other small projectiles flew in through the open window as they tumbled down the side of the steep hill.  Minseok didn't even have the time to register any pain before he out.

When he finally woke up, he was lying in a hospital bed. His room was dark, He heard the medical staff explain, probably to one of his distant relatives because he had no immediate family, over the phone that he had a concussion and a couple nasty cuts, but was lucky enough to survive the crash.  A crash.  His heart rate immediately started to rise.  A crash and the darkness meant that he never made it back to the wedding reception.  He felt his chest tighten thinking about how Luhan must have felt when his best man never came back.
“He must hate me now!“ Minseok thought as his mind went into panic mode.  “How will I face him again after this?“  Immediately, the thought came to his mind that he just wouldn't face Luhan again.  Why should he have to suffer seeing the one person he ever loved be happy without him?  And so when the sun went up the next day, Minseok checked out of the hospital and contacted his landlord and then his boss.
He was out of his old apartment and into a new one, and was transferred to a different branch of his company, in a town far from where he and Luhan grew up.  He spoke to no one about his move and broke all connections.  A new place with new people could mean a new beginning, right?  The only problem was he was now an outcast.  He acted as friendly and sociable as he ever was, pulled out all of his aegyo tricks.  Nobody wanted to associate with somebody that had such scars and a past he was unwilling to talk about.  If there even was anyone who wanted to get closer to him, he wouldn't— or rather, couldn't let them in.
Minseok eventually fell into a state of depression.  With no Luhan, nobody he knew, no friends, he had nothing left to live for.  Over the months, he ate less and less.  All the while, he slowly lost the will to go to work and stay focus.  When the day came that he was finally laid off, he couldn't care less.  Every passing day, he withdrew deeper into his own world, the one where he was still loved.  If all he was going to do with the money he earned was save it, what use was it to go make more?  The one thing he wanted was to go back to those days with Luhan.

And so he built the library of his childhood again.  Of course, it was impossible to build a carbon copy of it.  The books weren't all the same, not that he really read all the books at the original, nor did he plan to read many of these ones.  The bricks, the view, the air, everything was still different.  Minseok was so damn close though.  He could never really put a finger on what his library was missing.
He had been trying so hard to forget about Luhan after all this time, but the other still haunted his mind and made it hard for him to make new memories in this new place.  Time never fully healed the scars from that one terrible wedding day.  It hurt Minseok so much, he could bear to consciously think about that incident anymore or about his former best friend.  Sometimes, he would be so absorbed in his delusions of the past and be so used to pretending that sad part of his life never happened that he would swear that he didn't understand why he felt so cold and hollow.

The handful of regular visitors knew him as the silent recluse that was as stubborn as a rock when it came to talking to others.  They were understanding though, and would keep him company.  Every week, they'd come in with new stories to tell about the events in town until Minseok grew fond of them enough to share his reasons for building the library with them.
Many of the people who came in didn't rent anything, but rather came for the comforting peace and quiet.  The main visitors were youngsters looking for a place to study or to escape from troubles like quarreling parents.  This was the one thing that brought Minseok some joy, that gave him reason to persevere.  To see people fall in love with this library for the same reasons he did.  That was why he was so fond of the kids that visited.

"A man recently moved here." one of the kids, a boy named Oh Sehun, shared with him one day.  "I heard it was because of some nasty divorce and he didn't want anything to do with the lady anymore."
"Is that so?" Minseok responded, his mind briefly flickering to the day of his accident before he repressed the memory again. "It's not polite to gossip about people behind their backs." he chided the boy.
"Can I recommend this place to him?  I bet he could use a place to chill after all he's been through."
Minseok shrugged.  "Do whatever you want."  Nowadays, he kept his answers short and sweet.  He didn't want to risk saying something about his past and remind himself of those unpleasant times.

Sometimes things just pop into your head and don't go away.  On one particular Sunday, Minseok’s day began on a bad note when the random thought of  “whatever happened to those tights?” popped into his head and refused to leave.  Usually he would be the only library open on Sundays because he long stopped going to church, but today he decided not to unlock the grand doors to the outside world.  He would rather deal with the silence of his vast, cold and empty library than with people on days his weak side was showing.
Usually ignoring the knocks on the front doors of the library weren't that hard to do, but it was getting increasingly irritating today with someone's incessant knocking.
"We're closed for today!" Minseok finally spoke out after listening to the disruptive noise for nearly 30 full minutes.  The knocking ceased for a brief time before starting again.  Aggravated, he finally went to open the door and confront the stranger.
"Did you hear me?  We're closed—"
Before he knew what hit him, the stranger had pushed his way in and engulfed him in a bear hug that he couldn't seem to push away.  He could only stand there, frozen, looking wide eyed at the skinny intruder that dared force his way into his world.

"Minseok, I've missed you so much." said the stranger with oddly familiar crooked lower front teeth.