Just one mistake. Just one regret.

 

I don't know how it ended up like this. I only looked at him as a friend but I didn't expect that I'll fall for him. We're only supposed to be bestfriends but I fell for him. But I know it's wrong...

 

'Cause I think about you every single day...

 

And it killed me everytime I hear your name...

 

*But I never knew Sehun's feelings for me, so how can I be sure that he doesn't like me?*

 

Little did I know, I just asked myself a question that will never be answered.

 

I walked through the cold hallways of the school and I can feel the aura of boredom seeping out from me. I kept my eyes on the floor until I heard some familiar voices.

 

"See you on Saturday, Sulli!"

 

It's none other than the boy I like, Oh Sehun. He's not really the hearthrob type but he is well-known is school for being an intelligent student and for being good in Math.

 

"Yeah, sure. I can't wait!"

 

Sulli answered Sehun. sulli is a friend of Sehun. They're really close but we're closer.

 

But what's with Saturday? Is there something going on? Wait, what did Sulli said about she can't wait?

 

He didn't ask her out did he? Well, that's the end of me, thank you very much. He probably asked her out because they've been togethr for days. And it's pretty obvious how he likes Sulli. You can't separate the two of them and that's the proof of their close relationship.

 

While thinking all those hurtful thoughts, my eyes never left the ground that I didn't notice that Sehun is now in front of me.

 

"Hyunie-ah..." he called but I didn't look up.

 

Then all of a sudden, he lifted my chin that made me lock gazes with a pair of beautiful, fulgent eyes.

 

"What is it, Sehun-ah?" I asked.

 

"Help me. I need you with something,"

 

"The last time I helped you with something, you blew up. I mean literally because you blew up the chemistry lab last month," I glared at him.

 

"Please. Just this time," he pleaded.

 

"I'm sorry but I can't help you,"

 

 

I left him with my mind and conscience bothering me. It's not that I don't want to help him. Believe me, I'd love to but I'm afraid that if I do so, i'll fall for him more. And that will make the situation harder for the both of us.

 

 

After a few steps away from him, he shouted something.

 

"Saturday, 4pm at the mall. I'll still wait for you!" he shouted then ran off to somewhere.

 

I'd love to help you in everything, Sehun. But if it involves giving you away to another girl, I'm sorry but I have to decline your offer.

 

 

Saturday afternoon came. I was alone in our house. My parents are out. My brother is in his friend's house. ALL ALONE.

 

The tick of the clock in my room paranoids me. Every tick is like the beat of my heart. 

 

The clock striked 4:00 but I didn't move. I stayed in my bed, letting my mind wander to nowhere. BUt my heart stayed where it is. IN PAIN.

 

The clock striked 5:00. An hour already passed. Is he still waiting for me? Probably not. He and Sulli must be happy now. Too happy that they didn't even care to call me.

 

The sun came down and the dark, starless sky hugged our cold neighborhood. The two of them must've had a good time. Good time without me.

 

My eyes felt heavy and I almost fell asleep when all of a sudden, my phone rang, making my ringtone interrupt the silence of our empty house.

 

"Yoboseo?"

 

"Hello? Seohyun-ah!" Sulli's panicked voice filled my ears.

 

"Sulli-ah, why are you calling at this late hour?" I complained.

 

"Seohyun! Sehun is..."

 

With a pounding heart, a sweaty face, and painful legs, I rushed to the hospital after I got a call from Sulli.

 

Please. Sehun, don't...

 

I reached the hospital with nothing with me but a nervous feeling. As I reached the second floor, sobs and cries of worry invaded my ears.

 

There, I saw Sulli and Sehun's friends waiting nervously for the results. I joined them but among all of us, I can feel that I am the one who worries the most for Sehun.

 

We stood up from our seats as we heard the door open. The doctor went out and removed his mask.

 

 

 

"The patient is safe now. You can come inside, if you want,"

 

 

 

But of course, that's what NOT the doctor said.... It's just what I expect him to say.

 

 

"Time of death, 9:12pm. I'm sorry,"

 

My legs felt weak that I fell down to the floor.

 

No... This is so not happening...

 

They tried to calm me down but when I did, my face is already soaked with tears. Sulli was the one who spoke first to me.

 

"Seohyun-ah, why didn't you come?" she asked.

 

With tearful eyes, I looked at her, "What?"

 

"He was waiting for you. Why didn't you come? He loved you, Seohyun-ah..."

 

For a split second, I stopped crying, "WHAT?!"

 

"He was going to tell you that he loves you in that place because that's where he met you. He even asked for my help so he could confess to you in a way that you like but you didn't come," Sulli expalined, trying to hide her tears.

 

"Then, how did he..." I choked in saying the word, "died?"

 

"He was waiting for you until 8:50 but you didn't came. Losing hope, he decided to go to your house to confess then that's how he got into an accident..."

 

Then it hit me like a thousand bricks. Sehun died when he was going to my house. I... killed him.

 

"I know what you're thinking, Seohyun. Don't blame yourself. It's not you," she said.

 

With trembling steps, I went to Sehun's room. coldness and silence welcomed me.

 

I closed the door and was left dumbounded. In one swift movement, he's gone. I didn't get the chance to be his girlfriend. Never did and never will.

 

Tears fell from my eyes as I looked at the dead, cold, lifeless body of the boy I love. I held his ice-cold hand but felt something while holding it. A piece of crumpled paper.

 

I opened it and read his letter.

 

 

Dear Seohyun, 

 

     Hi Hyunie! Sehun, your bestfriend, here. First, I want to thank you for being with me always and I'm very grateful that I met you. Second, I want to apologize if I annoy you and piss you of. Want to know why I'm saying these things to you?

 

     It's because I like you. Scratch that, LOVE YOU, I mean. And this is my way of confessing. I may be a small guy (Just kidding. I'm 181 cm tall. Haha!) but I have a big heart for the girl I love.

 

     And that girl is none other than you, Choi Seohyun. How lucky you are to have a guy like Oh Sehun love you. Just kidding! But seriously...

 

     I love you, Choi Seohyun.

 

 

From your bestfriend/lover, Oh Sehun

 

 

His letter is now soaked with my tears as I finished reading it.

 

"Sehun, why? Why did you leave me now I know that you love me too?" I asked him with croaked voice.

 

But I know that he won't answer. And he never will.

 

 

I thought everything was perfect and I thought that it wouldn't change. But I underestimated fate and destiny that it took the boy that I love away from me. Away from me..... FOREVER.

 

One mistake yet it made me regret everything...

 

 

I regret that I didn't come earlier to see him before he died.

 

I regret that I didn't come to see him at the mall.

 

I regret that I didn't agree to help him.

 

I regret that I didn't told him before that I love him.

 

I regret that I loved him.

 

I regret that i fell for him.

 

I regret that I met him.

 

One mistake yet I feel like I've done an unforgivable crime. The only crime that I did, was fall in love with you.

 

Unsure of what to do, I let my mind drift away from the reality that I never want to be in again.

 

I was left hurt and weak but I'm only sure of one thing...

 

 

That I...

 

Regret everything...

---

HI THERE READERS!!!!!

Here is my first ever oneshot!! Like it? I hope you do :))

I'm sorry but you can't expect me to write fanfics that all ends in a happy ending....

You see, I experienced pain too and I'm just writing  how I feel. 

And by writing, I'm facing the reality that somethimes, there are no happy endings....

 

SORRY FOR LETTING OUT MY EMOTIONS HERE!!!!!  I hope you'll understand.. 

But I'll still write fics with happy endings so don't worry :DDD