Honestly, I feel really lost these days. I don't know why I'm here on earth because unlike some people, I'm not talented and I don't really have anything special about me. I'm also quite quiet so I'm easily forgotten compared to my friends who are loquacious and chatty. I end up hanging out with them but not doing anything; I'm just kind of there but I'm not talking or really with them. It doesn't really help that I'm insecure. I always think that I'm a bother to my friends so I can't join their conversation because I feel like I'll be bothering them. I'm not the type that opens up to people easily so I can't really talk about how I feel with anybody. Please help?

Unnie has a lot to get off her chest on this one.

According to physics, everything is the centre of the universe and we are made of the same material as stars so you are the centre of the universe and also star-dust. Now, if that didn’t make you feel at least a little special…. Everyone is talented in their own way, you may just not be trying hard enough. I know that people who are insecure tend to procrastinate to deliberately sabotage themselves because they’re scared of the repercussion of success and also to protect themselves from failure. You are going to be talented somewhere, God is somewhat fair and to be honest, a lot of time, people get far in life not by being especially talented but by being unique, innovative, hard-working and driven. You’ll find that X-factor in yourself someday so never give up on finding out how bright you really can shine.

We all live to find that purpose in our lives and sometimes it won’t even be that straightforward. Some people find their purpose in a passion, in a humanitarian project, their families or maybe even something as simple as cars. Never lose hope, unnie is cheering for you! As with your friends, they essentially do care for you, even if they do not show it. They care for your feelings and they want you to speak up more. Insecurity is so normal, everyone feels inferior in their own way and it’s so goddamn normal that you shouldn’t feel helpless at all about his one. One thing to start on is surrounding yourself with positivity, work on your independence and confidence with tiny little challenges every single day. Maybe shoot a smile at someone you’ve never talked to before, answer one question in class every day. Take tiny, baby steps but make sure to take yourself a little bit out of your comfort zone every, singly day.

As I mentioned in the above paragraph, do little things, maybe drop a line in a conversation a day. Slowly, you’ll be able to adjust and swallow your fears. Make small, feasible goals to reach and before you know it, you’ll be more confident and find that your friends are welcoming and that communicating with them will make you feel less lonely and insecure. I understand you don’t open up easily but you need to get your feelings out somewhere, even if it’s a diary or something so you don’t keep all the negativity bottled up inside. Unnie believs in you, so keep fighting!

- Love, Seohyun (Seo Joohyun) ♥

(I’m sure my co-author has something to say on this one since she is like the sun, she radiates light like crazy. Motherly too XD I can relate to what you are feeling right now because I hit a huge slump the beginning of this year not only due to family/financial problems but also due to the fact that I felt so lacklustre and not-so-special as compared to my own over-achieving classmates. It’s important to find value in yourself and stop comparing in order to feel good. You feel that it’s hard to open up right? Both of us are here to talk to, since you don’t know us and you may feel more comfortable disclosing information that way :D HWAITING!)