Sometimes, he wonders why was he chosen to be in EXO-M. He’s good in wushu, yes. But he isn’t the best in rapping like Kris, he isn’t the best in singing like Chen, he isn’t great in dancing like Luhan and Lay, and he isn’t adorable and lovable like Xiumin. He has heard what the “fans” say behind his back. He has seen fan accounts where they have claimed him ugly and disgusting looking. A lot of fan accounts had also claim he was really scary and that nobody would ever find him attractive because he would scare them away. They also said how he probably got surgery on his eyelids to make them look puffy, but he didn’t. They were natural. They said how nobody should compare him to a panda and he shouldn’t be nicknamed a panda because pandas were adorable and he was nothing compared to a panda. 

 

He couldn’t agree more. He always felt like he did not belong in EXO-M. He didn’t have any fans and whenever everyone performed live, he was either pushed all the way to the side or in the back where nobody could see him. If it’s not that, he was wearing one of the ugliest outfits in his opinion.

 

One day while reading a fan account, he started tearing because he felt that people were hating him more and more due to the TaoRis action that happened during the performance Two Moons. It wasn’t his fault he had feelings for his leader. It wasn’t his fault that they had to do it for the fans. SM’s leaders thought it would help bring in money. They make basically everyone do fan service. Most members like it because they are a couple, but Kris and Tao are not, therefore he hates it. He wishes he could be in a relationship with him, but he knows it would just up everything that was offered to him….not that there was much in the first place.

 

While reading the fan accounts, he didn’t notice his leader come up behind and had started reading the pages he was on. He didn’t notice the anger in Kris’s face. He didn’t notice the angry tears that had started rolling down Kris’s face. He also didn’t notice him storming out the room. He noticed nothing that was going out behind him. He was too stuck in reading the hateful comments.

 

When Kris had stormed out of his and Tao’s room, he immediately gathered the rest of EXO-M (besides Tao) and had a deep discussion with them. They needed to know what was going on. They needed to know why Tao was depressed lately.

 

“What’s wrong Kris?” Lay and Xiumin had asked. “Tao…. Has been reading stuff about him..” he replied. “Like what?” Chen asked. “Hateful stuff… he’s upstairs right now in our room, looking at what people write about us.. Only the bad things though. I’m not sure why he’s doing that, but all I know is that a there are a LOT of hateful comments.” Kris explained with an angry look on his face. His -face was extreme. The members hated that face in general, now that there was anger added, it made it even scarier. 

 

“What kind of hateful comments though?” Xiumin decided to ask Kris. 

 

Kris sighed and rubbed his temples. “They claimed that he’s taking me away from Lay and how Tao is a because he wants me all for himself. Also, they claimed that he was nothing to the group and was not needed. He was ugly and useless. These so-called ‘fans’ had also said how they feel that SM took pity on Tao because he had no other talent but his stupid wushu. I hate them, I hate them so much…” Kris had drifted of about to start crying. 

 

He didn’t like how people thought of Tao. This is the first time he has seen stuff like that, but it seems that Tao has been looking at this stuff for weeks. If he saw that much in about 10 minutes, how much did Tao see in just a few weeks? He couldn’t even imagine all of the things that were possibly said. He would never think of such about Tao because … he loved Tao.

 

In Kris’s eyes, Tao was no . Tao was the innocent maknae to him. Tao was apart of EXO-M because he was TALENTED, not because SM took pity on him. If they actually took pity on him, they would have made him change his whole style and his life, but they didn’t. They didn’t even tell Tao to stop being himself. They continued to let Tao be him and not have to worry about being changed. All they did was add makeup to Tao’s face for performances and shows. There’s nothing wrong with that.

 

When Kris looked up, he saw anger in the other member’s eyes. He could just imagine how they felt. Everyone thought of Tao in a good way. They thought of him as the big little brother nobody had. EXO-M loved Tao because he was Tao. 

 

“I’m going to go talk to him… don’t mention anything I told you to him for me… please?” Kris asked. They all nodded, but very stiffly.

 

Kris walked back to their room and noticed Tao wasn’t on his laptop anymore, but was on his bed, sleeping, but tears were rolling down his face. 

 

He walked over to Tao and sat on his bed lightly.

 

“Tao.. You know all of EXO loves you. EXO-M and EXO-K. Sehun, Kai, Kyungsoo, Chanyeol, Baekhyun, Suho, Chen, Lay, Luhan, Xiumin and myself. We love you and we love you for you. We do not think anything less of you. I love you more… because I’m in love with you. Even though I know you cannot hear me because you’re sleep, I love you, my wushu panda..” He whispered kissing the top of Tao’s forehead. He wanted to cry, but didn’t. He was the leader, he wasn’t suppose to breakdown. He had to stay tough for Tao. He was somewhat happy he confessed, but he told himself that he had to do it when Tao was awake. When he raised he head away from Tao, he noticed a small smile on Tao’s face 

 

That calmed him down quite a bit, knowing he was able to make Tao smile in his sleep.

 

Making himself calm down even further, he started dozing off and within a few minutes, he fell asleep.

 

What he didn’t know is that Tao was awake the whole time during his confession. ‘I’ll talk to him.. In the morning’ Tao thought to himself drifting off into his own dreamland.

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Well... that's it c: 
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