We Belong Together - Mariah Carey

I didn't mean it
When I said I didn't love you so
I should have held on tight
I never should've let you go

 

A knock on the door rouses him from his uneasy slumber. The floor is cold and hard and there's a terrible crick in his neck. Rolling over, he makes no move to answer although the noisy visitor is making quite a racket now.

"Changmin? Changmin, you there?" the person outside raps the door urgently.

He thinks he hears someone calling him but its not the voice he's been longing for - her voice. So he ignores it and tries to remember what she sounded like instead, what he would do if she was here now.

A few minutes later, the knocking stops but only because the intruder seems to have remembered where the spare key is. He hears shuffling feet enter and walk over to him, stopping a few feet by his head. 

"Min, you've been drinking again?"

Changmin doesn't respond but the answer is obvious judging by the empty bottles scattered around him.

Yunho tuts like a mother hen and begins cleaning up the apartment.

"I haven't seen you for 6 days. Man, you really let yourself go." He says from the kitchen.

"You know your sister is worried about you right? She called yesterday saying you won't pick up and she left 12 messages. I wish my sister was that concerned about me," Yunho jokes, trying to lighten the mood.

When Changmin continues to stay silent Yunho stops what he's doing and walks back over. Kneeling so they are eye to eye, he pats Changmin lightly on the shoulder.

"Hey, you alright?" He asks softly.

Changmin shrugs. He feels kind of numb actually, which may be better than the searing pain in his chest before the alcohol - he's not sure.

"What happened Min? Where is she?" Yunho questions.

He his lips and whispers back "She's ... She's gone."

 

I did nothing
I was stupid
I was foolish
I was lying to myself

2 months earlier:

"So who is this photographer?" Changmin asks, idly flipping through a magazine as the hairdresser fusses over his dark locks.

Next to him, Yunho shrugs as he scrolls through his phone. "Not sure, never heard of her."

"Her?"

"Yup, I think so at least. I mean Seo Joo Hyun sounds like a girl doesn't it?"

"Well she's late. Hate it when people are late." Changmin mumbles, slightly grumpy.

Yunho smirks and pretends he didn't hear him. "I think the staff are done setting up the snack bar."

Changmin's eyes light up and he stands, already making his way out of the fitting room. "I'll go check."

Yunho just nods, going back to his phone without looking up. 

Changmin enters the set and follows his nose to the buffet table. After careful deliberation, he decides to sample the japchae first. But just as he's about to take a bite, he spies a girl on the other side of the room who he doesn't recognize. A very pretty girl at that. 

Setting his morsel of food down, he slowly approaches. She's standing by herself, looking a little lost. 

"Hm, is she modeling with us today? Thought it was just Yunho and me," he wonders to himself. 

"Hey, dressing rooms are that way, although you look fine just the way you are," Changmin says with a charming grin.

She turns to look at him, startled. "I'm sorry?"

Up close, he notices she has large brown eyes which have a child-like innocence about them. They are a striking contrast from her womanly curves that first caught his interest. 

"And she's modest too, a rare combination these days. Did it hurt when you fell fom heaven sweetheart?" He asks smoothly.

She furrows her brows, looking at him as if he's sprouted two heads and just asked her how to get to Mars. 

"Does that line really work these days?" she asks, unimpressed.

He's a little taken aback by her curt reply and wonders where he went wrong.

But before he can try again, they are interrupted by the director who comes over calling, "There you are Joohyun-ssi! You found it ok then? Oh, and it looks like you've already met our model for today."

"Joohyun? Why does that sound so familiar..." Changmin thinks as he pieces it together.

Meanwhile, the girl named Joohyun bows low and smiles a little unsurely. "Yes, thank you sir. But I left my equipment in my car, so if you'll give me just a few minutes to set up -"

Their gregarious director nods cheerfully and leads her away saying, "Of course, of course. Let me show you around first."

He wisks her off, leaving Changmin to ponder what just happened by himself. When Yunho joins him a few minutes later, Changmin collects his wits and tells him in a mortified voice, " hyung, I think I just hit on our photographer."

This gets Yunho's attention. Amused, he laughs loudly and remarks, "Well this is a new one even for you Changmin. Is there anyone you haven't hit on yet? Like that cordi noona over there - is she still available?"

The younger man glares at him, "Not funny."

Yunho chuckles, "Sorry, couldn't pass that one up. But seriously Min, the photographer?"

Changmin runs an agitated hand through his hair. 

"I know, I know. This is going to be so awkward now."

Yunho pats his shoulder reassuringly,  "Hey relax man, you're a professional, you got this."

"That's right, professional - I'm a professional," Changmin chants to himself, like an athlete before a big game. 

He can't remember the last time a girl has made him lose his composure like this. Luckily, Yunho has his solo shots first so Changmin stands back and observes quietly.

Joohyun, he finds out, is actually quite good at what she does despite her young age. She has a calm and easy going way of handling the shoot, yet nothing is messy or amateur about her results. She and Yunho are working so well together that Changmin is getting a little miffed and impatiently begins wondering when he'll get his chance. 

Finally, he is called forward and stands in front of the camera, awaiting his instructions.

She doesn't reference their first conversation and gets right to business. 

"Changmin-ssi, I think we can use the first few frames to get comfortable with the concept. Why don't you start by sitting down."

He doesn't hide his surprise. Photographers have asked for some strange things before but few have told him to sit on the floor while wearing a $4,000 Armani suit. 

Slowly, he lowers himself to the floor and "gets comfortable" as she had suggested. 

"Ok, so the theme today is elegance. Personally, what do you find elegant Changmin-ssi?" she asks, her lyrical voice floating over to him from across the set, where she sits with her camera. 

Strangely, the noise around the busy set doesn't distract him and he finds himself focusing completely on her and the question she just posed. 

The first answer off the tip of his tongue is "you" but somehow he doesn't think she would appreciate this.

"I think elegance is ... effortless, something innate that just happens." he answers slowly, opting for a more thoughtful response.

She nods, "Good, and if you were to show me what that is using just your hands, what would it look like?" 

"Just my hands?" he questions, making sure he heard correctly.

"Yes." 

This is becoming more complicated then Changmin first thought. He raises one hand slowly, acutely aware that he could end up looking ridiculous. 

"Hm, it looks a little stiff still." he hears her say. "Try focusing on one thing, like your finger tips. Show me the angles you can create."

He adjusts his pose and hopes this is what she's looking for.

"Good, keep going." She encourages him.

Basking under her praise, he finally starts to feel confident and gets through the rest of the shoot pretty comfortably.

-----------------------------------------

Changmin is pulling on his street clothes in the dressing room when Yunho walks in chuckling. 

"So did you get her number in the end?"

He hums a noncommital response. "I don't think she's my type hyung."

Yunho fakes a shocked look. "Really? I thought every girl is your type."

"Hey, I do have some requirements. She has to have two legs, arms, a brain would be nice but not mandatory." he replies, equally sarcastic.

"Ah, I see why Joohyun isn't your type, she's not a complete bimbo."

Changmin sighs. "That and she's more of the girl next door who you date and bring candy and flowers to. Next thing you know, you're settled down with 2 kids and a dog. Not exactly what I'm looking for."

Yunho shakes his head at his philandering young friend, "You never know Min, she may be exactly what you need."

---------------------------------------------

Joohyun packs up her equipment carefully and starts to haul it back to her car.

"Joohyun-ssi! You forgot this!" a young man calls out. He easily catches up to her in a few long strides.

"Oh, thank you ...."

"It's Minho. Choi Minho."

"Thank you Minho-ssi" she says, smiling at him. Now that she takes a look at his face, she remembers he was one of the prop managers for the shoot. He seems pretty young still, maybe in college? 

He grins, "Happy to help. Actually, do you need assistance carrying these? Here, let me."

"Oh, no I'm fine -" she starts, but he's already picked up her bags and is walking away purposefully.

"Thank you." she says again once they've reached her car.

"Not a problem. If you ever need anything, just give me a call." he says, his face turning red as he hands her a slip of paper. He runs off before she can react.

Joohyun chuckles a little to herself when she opens the note and sees his phone number written there with a few hearts.

"Looks like you've got an admirer."

She turns and sees Changmin standing there with a smirk on his face again.

"I guess some guys know how to approach girls" she retorts.

"Ouch man, she's got a point." says Yunho, walking over and clapping Changmin on the shoulder.

Changmin glares at him and scoffs, "If by approach you mean throwing paper at someone and leaving, sure."

"I think it's sweet." Joohyun speaks up, defending the boy.

Changmin rolls his eyes. "If you want to really have a good time, come find me sweatheart. I'm leaving first, hyung." With that, he gets into his posh-looking sports car and drives off.

Yunho gives Joohyun an apologetic look. "Sorry about that. He really doesn't mean to come off as a complete ."

She just smiles. "Thanks, Yunho-ssi. It was nice meeting you today. I'll see you some other time?"

"Sure, see you Joohyun-ssi"  

 

I didn't know you
I didn't know me
But I thought I knew everything
I never felt
The feeling that I'm feeling now

 

"Where did you say they want this photoshoot?"

His agent, Leeteuk, sighs over the phone and explains again. "The magazine thinks it would be an interesting idea to have it at your house. It would be more intimate. A new, fresh look at who Shim Changmin is."

"And why would I ever agree to this?"

"Your fans would go crazy! Think about how much attention this would get!"

"Again, why would I ever agree to this?"

He can almost feel Leeteuk's frustration through the phone. It's kind of amusing actually. 

"Min, this can open more doors for you. We have a great opportunity. The photographer's ready to go, Seo Jin Hyun or something. It will be easy, 2 hours at most. All you have to do is be there -"

"Wait, who did you say the photographer is?"

"Photographer? Oh, er Seo Jin Hyun? No, it's Seo Joo Hyun. You know her?"

"Tell them Saturday is fine."

"But you have an interview that morning-"

Click.

"Hello? Hello?"

Leeteuk looks at his his phone, shaking his head.

"Aish, this kid."

----------------------------------

Changmin meticulously checks his reflection in the mirror one more time. Satisfied, he walks over to his living room and notices that he's still got 20 minutes to burn.

He decides to tidy up the place while he waits, although honestly, his housekeeper has already ensured that there is little that is out of order. 

He's a little surprised when someone knocks only 5 minutes later.

Opening the door, he can't help but take a moment to admire the girl at his doorstep. Yup, definitely worth getting up early on a Saturday for.

She stares back and tucks a strand of her hair behind her ear. "Can I come in?"

Wordlessly, he stands aside and allows her to enter with her equipment in tow. 

"Thanks." She says quietly.

He locks the door and asks, "Want a tour?"

She consents quickly. "Sure. It's probably a good idea so I can see where the light is best."

His lips quirk into a smile. "Of course, the ever constant professional." 

Leading the way, he shows her the rooms of his penthouse. Although still an apartment, it is quite large and consists of two stories.  

"So this is the kitchen, want anything to drink?" He says, wrapping up the tour.

She shakes her head no, but walks up to the fridge anyways. 

"Who drew these for you? They're very colorful." She asks, lightly touching the childish finger paintings and cards made with crayon and glitter that adorn his fridge. 

"Oh, those are from my niece, She's in 1st grade." He rubs the back of his neck, looking a little embarrassed.

"They're really the only decoration I've added to this house." He continues, not sure why he's explaining.

She turns and beams at him, making him catch his breath. "I think they're beautiful."

He laughs, "I'll make sure to let her know then."

"What's her name?" 

"Soojung."

"That's a lovely name too. It looks like you're her favorite uncle." Joohyun says, reading one of the cards.

"I'm her only uncle." Changmin remarks dryly.

She laughs, a beautiful, tinkling sound that Changmin wants to hear more.

"Soojung, you just earned yourself that pony you wanted for Christmas." He thinks to himself.

"You must spoil her then."

"Sometimes. So, should we start?"

Joohyun nods and looks thoughtfully at him. If he didn't know any better, he would think she's checking him out. 

"Would you like to change clothes? I think what you have on is fine. The shoot is supposed to be minimalistic."

He decides he's fine with it if she is. "Take me as I am." He grins, deliberately slipping in the innuendo. 

She pretends she didn't hear him and walks over to begin setting up.

He watches her for a minute before trying to make himself useful. 

"Oops."

"Changmin! My tripod!" 

"Sorry! It doesn't seem to be very even. You really need to get better equipment Joohyun."

She sighs and fixes the contraption he helped knock over. 

"Ok, let's get started."

"Right here?"

"Sure, this is you in your natural habitat right?"

He wriggles his eyebrows suggestively at her. "Actually, that would be upstairs. If you recall from my tour just now, the bedroom is this way- Ouch! Why did you hit me?"

She replies in complete seriousness, "It was deserved. Now pose."

Changmin sighs. "As you command."

They do several shots of him sitting on the sofa, reading, and then some in the kitchen. He washes an already clean cup as a way to keep his hands busy. For some reason, whenever she is behind the camera, his senses are heightened and he notices every movement of hers. 

She seems to realize this and says, "Just pretend I'm not here. This is just you on a normal Saturday morning."

Playfully, he splashes her with the water from the sink. 

"Changmin! My lenses!" 

He grins, unapologetic. "See, you're very difficult to ignore."

She rolls her eyes. "Let's move to another room."

They enter the study, where he poses with more books in his hands. The spines crack when he opens them and looking sheepish, he explains, "I guess this is one I haven't gotten to yet."

She smiles, not judging him. "Why don't you show me something you do everyday then."

He gets an idea and says, "Come, follow me." 

He shows her the way upstairs again. Without hesitating, they enter his bedroom. But he immediately moves to the back, where two French doors open to a private balcony.

Changmin leans against the railing and lets the breeze ruffle his hair. He hears Joohyun follow him, but doesn't turn around right away.

"This is my spot. I come here in the mornings or whenever I need a break and just relax."

She leans over as well. "I can see why, this view is lovely."

After a few moments, he looks sideways at her and notices how the wind has swept her hair up, the long, silky strands dancing around her with a life of their own. She looks unkempt and utterly beautiful.

"So...."

"Hm? Oh right, hold it right there." She says, forgetting for a minute that she has a camera around her neck. 

A rapid flurry of clicks go off before he can even blink. He wonders if she's the one who is a little unsettled by their close proximity now.

He decides to test his theory. Without a word, he moves to the bed, sitting down on it while looking directly at her. Silently, he challenges her to continue. 

She slowly lowers her camera and looks unsure. 

"What's wrong?" He asks softly.

"Nothing." She finally says, vowing to herself that she won't lose her professionalism because of him. 

"You sure? We can always go somewhere else-"

"Pose." 

He raises an eyebrow but doesnt argue. "You got it."

Although the camera lenses are between them, she can feel the intensity of his gaze. He's slowly breaking down her barriers, the carefully constructed wall she erected between her heart and the world. She just hopes she can get some good photos out of this in return.

Changmin has to give her props, he thought she would back down, but she's giving as good as she gets. He lies down, stretching out on the bed and yawning innocently. 

"Joohyun, you're not tired?" He asks.

She shakes her head and continues snapping away. 

This will not do. In one swift motion, he reaches over and wraps an arm around her waist. With a simple tug, she is lying down underneath him, her hair splayed out as her head rests between his hands. 

Her eyes widen as she realizes the position he has her in. 

"This is a different angle, right?"

She in a breath, and he watches, fascinated, as she her lips before answering.  

"I suppose for you this is also part of the routine."

The effect of her simple statement is greater than she anticipates. He blinks and breaks eye contact. 

"No, I don't bring girls here. You're the first." He says, turning away from her. 

He sounds ... lonely? It could be a ploy to gain her sympathy, but Joohyun instinctively feels that some of his walls have gone down today too. Perhaps she shouldn't be so quick to judge him.

She taps him lightly on the shoulder.

"How about a lunch break? I'm starving." 

He grins, "Sure, I'll make us some ramen."

She arches an eyebrow, "Ramen? That's what Shim Changmin eats?"

"Hey, don't hate on ramen. That stuff is delicious. Trust me."

She laughs, "Ok, I'll take your word for it. Lead the way chef."

 

I could not fathom that I would ever
Be without your love
Never imagined I'd be
Sitting here beside myself

 

She looks at the negatives in front of her with a critical eye and carefully selects the ones she will develop. A little voice in the back of her head asks her why most of the ones she's chosen are of him, but she stubbornly ignores it and heads to her dark room.

As she preps the chemical solution, a process she's done so often she could repeat it on her sleep, her mind wanders. It's been 2 days since she last saw him for their latest shoot and somehow, she can't stop re-hashing it in her head. What she remembers most is the way his eyes crinkle when he smiles - not the fake one he uses for public appearances but the genuine one he shared with her over their modest lunch of ramen noodles that day. She wishes she had captured that moment on film.

The first photo is ready and when she catches a glimpse of his face, her heart stutters. She has to admit, he is a handsome man, probably the most handsome she's met before. But is that all this is? Physical attraction? Its undeniable that there is something between them, a spark she hasn't felt for a long time. Their encounters make her knees weak and cheeks burn more often than she'd like to admit.

But Joohyun is a careful girl. She assesses all angles of a situation before making a decision, which is perhaps why she is so good at her job. She certainly isn't the type to have a fling let alone a one night stand.

Thus it's a little scary how much she wants to give in to him. 

Suddenly, she hears her doorbell ring, interrupting her work.

Wondering who it could be, she walks over and opens the door. Her eyes are still adjusting to the brightness, so she squints at her visitor and is not at all prepared for who it is.

"Changmin? What are you doing here?" she blurts out. 

He smirks at her and takes off his sunglasses smoothly. If Seo Joo Hyun was anything like his millions of adoring fans, she would have melted into a puddle on the floor. Luckily, she is made of stronger stuff. 

"You are one tricky woman to track down, Ms. Seo." he says. 

She stares at him blankly and says in a deadpan voice, "Are you ... tracking me then? That's a little creepy." She starts to close the door on him, causing him to panic and comedically cry out, "What? Don't take it that way!".

He sticks his foot in-between her door to prop it open and huffs indignantly, "Don't you recognize a compliment when you see one?"

"I recognize a fool when I see one." is her reply.

"Hey! Can't you be a little nice?"

She rolls her eyes but decides to be a hospitable host and let him in. Walking back towards her dark room, she calls out, "Close the door please, I need to get back to work."

"Work?" intrigued, Changmin does what he's told and swiftly follows her.

Entering the dark room, he almost runs into her and has to grab her waist to keep from falling.

"Changmin! Watch where you're going!" she cries.

"Sorry! Sorry! I'll be a good boy. Promise." he reassures her.

She sighs, already unnerved by his presence. "Right, just stay out of the way ok?"

"Will do ma'm."

".... And you can let go now."

"Oh! Right, sorry." 

He apologizes but it is rather insincere as he would love nothing more than to keep holding her there. Regretfully, he lets his fingers slip from her slim waist and back into his pockets. In the dark, he doesn't notice her shiver at the contact they had.

She quickly busies herself with the rest of her photos and clips some of the completed ones up for drying. Although he's distracted her quite a bit already, she gets back into her rythmn and almost forgets he's there.

Changmin pokes around the small room, curious about what she does behind the scenes.

Turning to look at her, he is surprised to find his own face staring back at him.

"Hey, this is from our shoot." He recollects and walks over to get a better look.

"Yes, I'm going to develop them and send them over to the magazine tomorrow."

He nods and can't help but be impressed. The photos they took that day, he had no idea they would turn out so well. In each of them, there is raw emotion that he hasn't seen captured before.  And he doesn't think he can take all of the credit as she had been the one to draw it out of him once again.

"They're good." He remarks quietly.

"Yes." Is all she says, and he likes that she isn't self-deprecating about it. 

She's standing only a few feet away, her face barely visible. The air feels heavy, as if weighed down by the endless possibilities between them.

Changmin walks behind her and leans his hands on the table, trapping her beneath him. She freezes, dropping what she is holding but remaining silent.

"Will you give me a chance Joohyun?" he asks softly.

She falters. What to do now?

"A chance?"

"A chance to get to know each other. To explore this intangible connection we have. Don't deny it because I know you can feel it." He says, persuasively tracing his fingers up one of her forearms.

She inclines her head backwards without thinking, naturally resting against him. He feels solid and strong and she doesn't want to resist anymore.

"On one condition," she finally says, turning to face him.

Changmin nods, sure he would agree to whatever rule she imposes. She probably just wants to make him meet her parents or something- 

"You can't be my boyfriend." 

Well that was not what he was expecting. But he's intrigued. A girl like her, wanting an open relationship? Did Christmas come early?

She mistakes his silence as dislike for her suggestion and tries to convince him further.

"Let's just make this fun. No strings attached." 

"Really? No strings?"

"Yup. I'm a woman of my word Mr. Shim."

"I don't doubt that Ms. Seo. Just wanted to make sure."

She understands his need for clarification. To some extent, she surprised herself with her decision. Her logic is that he will inevitably move on to the next pretty young thing and she doesn't need the heartbreak. Joohyun is not as naive as she may look. Guys like Changmin don't date just one girl and get married. And she certainly won't be the one to reform him; she prefers self-preservation.

"You think you can live up to your reputation?" she asks.

Changmin grins widely and leans down. "Baby, I'll make sure you have the time of your life."

"Let's start right now then," she says, daring him to make a move.

He doesn't need a second invitation. Lifting her by the waist, he carries her out of the dark room with ease.

 

Now that I don't
Hear your voice
Or even touch or even kiss your lips
Cause I don't have a choice
What I wouldn't give
To have you lying by my side

 

He's drunk. That or the Earth has decided to start rotating on its axis faster. Most likely it is the former.

Stubbling a little, he finally gets out of the taxi and pays the driver. As it speeds off, Changmin looks around, owlishly trying to remember the right way.

Eventually, he heads left and somehow stays on his feet long enough to end up in front of a familiar looking door. 

He ignores the fact it is already the wee hours of the morning and knocks loudly until it finally opens.

"Changmin? What are you doing here?"

"Hm, is that the only greeting you're ever going to give me? Why do I remember having this conversation before." He slurs his words slightly and leans on her doorway.

But even in his inebriated state he can sense her annoyance. Knowing he's going to be barred from entrance soon, he quickly reaches out and entangles her in a hug. 

"Umph, you're heavy!" She cries and falls backwards. He lets gravity pull him along and suddenly, they're both inside, resting against a wall, nose to nose.

"Well hi there." He says, very pleased with himself. 

She scrunches her nose. "You smell like alcohol. Do you know what time it is?"

"I wanted to see you," is his only reply. 

"Right now?"

"Yup. This is fun right?"

"Our ideas of fun evidently don't coincide then."

He moves his hands to her waist and she belatedly remembers that she's only wearing her nightgown. 

"I think there's always something else we can try then." he whispers suggestively. 

She slaps his hands away angrily. 

"A late night booty call? Really?"

"Don't be crass," he admonishes her, "I really wanted to see you."

She sighs and gives up. She's too tired to play his game right now.

"Come on then, lets get you in bed."

"Oooh bed. Can I borrow some pajamas? I want a pretty one with bows on it like yours."

"Quiet drunkard."

--------------------------------------------

The sunlight streaming through the window wakes him and he immediately feels a splitting headache coming on. 

Groaning, he moves to get out of bed when he notices he's not at his apartment.

Looking around, he also notices he's in someone else's bed and that someone happens to be a very pretty brunette who is still asleep, curled cutely into his side.

Then it all comes back to him. The bar, the random girls he met there, the alcohol when he realized he didn't want any of them, and finally, the misguided taxi ride to her house. 

She had monopolized his thoughts last night. Although it had been quite easy to chat up the girls at the bar, it felt like he was just going through the motions. Every time he saw a long pair of legs and light brown hair, he was reminded of her and always disappointed when it obviously wasn't. After spending so much time with Joohyun these past weeks, he had wanted to get back into his bachelor lifestyle, as if he had something to prove. All it seemed to have resulted in was him ending up right back at her doorstep. 

He sighs and runs a hand through his hair.

The clock on her bedside table reads 7:00 am, much too early for contemplating such complicated matters.

He lies back down next to her instead and gently presses himself against her back. His arm naturally wraps around her waist and he dips his head, inhaling her sweet scent as his nose brushes the soft skin on the back of her neck. She sighs a little and snuggles against him. They fit perfectly.

----------------------------------

The next time Changmin wakes up, she's already gone but he can smell something delicious wafting in from the kitchen. 

He walks over quietly and finds her at the oven, flipping pancakes. She's humming a nursery rhyme he hasn't heard for a very long time and somehow, it makes her more irresistible than ever. 

"Morning" he says, sneaking up and hugging her.

She jumps and almost flips a pancake onto the counter. "Changmin! Oh, you're awake."

"That looks yummy."

"It's my secret recipe."

"Why do I feel like you have a lot of secrets Joohyun."

She stares at him, surprised at his insightfulness.  If only he knew that the secret she really wanted to hide was how quickly she was falling for him. That seeing him standing there in her kitchen, bedhead and shirtless, was making her fantasize  about a dozen inappropriate situations.

She manages a smile and nods towards the bathroom. "You should go get ready. These are almost done."

He gives her a knowing smirk but doesn't question her further. 

"Yes Ma'm" 

When he comes back, they eat together in companionable silence. The birds are chirping and the sunlight has made the room glow in warmth. It's an idyllic scene that Changmin want to commit to memory. Usually, morning afters are tricky affairs and involve him escaping as quickly as possible from the girl before she wakes up. There were no chirping birds or delicious pancakes to look forward to, just the walk of shame back to his apartment. He looks at Joohyun and for the first time, imagines what it would be like to do this every morning for the rest of their lives.

Suddenly, he stands up, his chair scrapping loudly against the floor.

She stares at him. "You're done?"

He can't meet her gaze and looks away guiltily. "Yeah. Actually, I've got to get going."

He moves to bring his plate to the sink but she intercepts him saying, "Sure. Here, I've got that."

Her tone is neutral, betraying nothing and he is too confused by everything he's feeling to argue. She walks him to the door and tells him where he can catch the bus. He nods, barely understanding the words she is saying and just looking for the quickest escape route.

When he's finally gone, she leans against the door and wills herself to not care.

But why did it hurt so much?

 

I'm feeling all out of my element
I'm throwing things, crying
Trying to figure out where the hell I went wrong
The pain reflected in this song ain't even half of what I'm feeling inside
I need you, need you back in my life, baby

 

Opening her mail one afternoon, she finds out that she's won an award for the first photoshoot they had together - the one with Yunho, who she remembers fondly.There's a banquet on Friday hosted by the magazine, cordially requesting her attendance. On the invitation is a box for her "and one". Does she have an "and one"?

Her mind automatically brings up Changmin's face, but she quickly turns that idea down. They haven't spoken since he left that morning and it is painfully obvious that he's been avoiding her. So be it. She will find a date on her own. 

She thumbs through her contact list in her cell phone and decides to get some advice from her old friend and college roommate, Nicole.

"Hello?"

"Nicole?"

"Joohyunnie! It's been like forever! How have you been girl?" the female on the other end gushes. She smiles, Nicole hasn't changed a bit.

"I'm good? You?"

"Oh you know, same old thing. I'm still working for the old man, he's gotten crankier with age I think. Now there's someone who doesn't know the meaning of aging gracefully."

This Joohyun has heard before. Nicole's dad is the editor in chief of a well established newspaper and is set in the traditional ways of his profession. As its new life and style columnist, her friend is constantly b with ideas to "bring the newspaper into the 21st century", so it was no surprise that they often butted heads. 

"Well, tell him I wish him good health." She replies.

"Ha! No worries, He'll probably outlive even me." Nicole laughs. "So what's up? I'm sure you didn't call just to find out about that."

"Have you heard of the banquet High Cut is holding this Friday?"

"Of course! They usually hold some pretty good ones, so I'm going to attend and probably write an article for it. Are you going?" 

"I think so, just got my invite in the mail. Do people usually take dates?"

"In general they do. I'll be going stag only since I need to interview people during the event."

Suddenly, Nicole lets out a squeal.

"Joohyun! Are you asking me to set you up?! Oh my gosh, -"

"Nicole-"

I already know the perfect guy! Do you -"

"Nicole!"

"Yeah?"

"I'm good actually, I just wanted an idea of what the event would be like."

"Are you sure? He's definitely your type. He's a doctor!"

"Nicole, do I need to remind you what happened the last time you got me a date?"

"Hey, how was I supposed to know that Yesung would only want to talk about his pet turtle. He looked great on paper!"

"I know, and thanks for trying, " Joohyun says patiently. "But I've already got someone in mind."

"Alright, if you're sure. I'll see you there then?"

"Yup, see you there."

"Cool, this will be soooo much fun Hyunnie!"

She laughs, "For sure. K, call you later."

"Bye bye!"

"Bye!"

Joohyun shakes her head as she hangs up. Nicole is irrepressible sometimes.

She scrolls through her contacts again, hesitating a second before finally going through with her plan.

"Minho-ssi? Are you free this Friday?"

-------------------------------

A nervous looking young man paces back and forth in front of his car. He checks the time for the umpteenth time before smoothing out his suit jacket once again. He is so distracted he doesn't notice someone approaching him from behind. She taps his shoulder, making him jump in surprise.

"Joohyun-ssi! What are you doing out here?!" he exclaims.

"I finished getting ready early and you didn't look like you wanted to come in, so I came out." She explains, smiling gently. 

"Ah, I wanted to go in! I was just, uh ... " Stumbling with his words, he remembers the bouquet he prepared for her. "Here! This is for you," he says shyly and hands it over quickly. 

She breaks out into a stunning smile. When was the last time someone got her flowers? 

"How lovely! Thank you, you really didn't have to."

He just shakes his head and changes the subject. "You look beautiful. Very beautiful." 

"Thank you", she says and blushes at the obvious sincerity in his voice.

"Shall we?"

"Lets go."

-------------------------------------

When they arrive at the venue, Minho lets out an appreciative whistle.

"They really went to town for this huh?"

Joohyun agrees silently. After handing over the keys to the valet, he proudly leads her in, her arm resting on his. They make an attractive couple, and immediately cause heads to turn.

Minho notices and laughs quietly. "Who would have thought, a mere props director attending an event like this. I owe you one Joohyun-ssi."

She disagrees, "I think you belong here more than me. You're much more confident and sociable. I prefer to hide behind my camera."

At this, he abruptly stops walking and turns her to face him.

"Joohyun-ssi, I wouldn't call what you do hiding. Your work - it's amazing and really shows a different perspective of the world, which is what more people need to see. Don't ever feel that you don't belong." he says warmly and presses her hand gently.

Her heart melts a little bit more. "He's too sweet." she thinks.

"I'll remember that. Thank you, Minho-ssi." she says.

He smiles and they continue inside to mingle with the other guests. They are in the middle of introductions with an up and coming young designer, when a joyful cry is heard.

"Joohyun! There you are!"

Nicole walks up gaily, clearly excited to see them. 

"Nicole, you look lovely." Joohyun says to her friend as they exchange hugs.

"I can't  rival you tonight though, especially with this handsome young man on your arm." The blonde responds, with a teasing look on her face.

"Oh, let me introduce you. Nicole, this is my friend Choi Minho. We met on the set if a photoshoot. Minho, my best friend and old roommate Nicole Jung."

"It's nice to meet you," Minho says politely.

"Very nice to meet you too. You don't happen to have a brother do you?" Nicole asks.

He looks surprised and says, "Actually, I do. How did you know ....?"

Joohyun decides to rescue him. "Don't mind her Minho-ssi, she just wants to know if he's single."

Nicole laughs and makes a face, "Hyunnie, always ruining my fun."

Behind her, someone says, "Well, looks like the gang's all here."

Joohyun's eyes widen when she sees who it is, but she quickly composes herself.

Meanwhile, Nicole spins around and, unaware of her friend's emotional turmoil, welcomes the newcomer.

"Changmin! I haven't seen you in forever! You're very busy these days it seems."

He shrugs, "Gotta make use of this pretty face right?"

He then looks directly at the girl who has been haunting his dreams every night since that morning he left her. She's still gorgeous, still achingly not his, and he doesn't know what he wants anymore but he's pretty sure its not for her arm to remain attached to the boy next to her. 

"Joohyun, having fun?" He asks quietly, not betraying his growing desire to detach her from her date and move her to his side, where she belongs.

Nicole looks surprised, "Oh, you two know each other?"

Joohyun feels herself burning under under his unyielding gaze. Or perhaps it's just her cheeks blushing on their own accord, her body has always been embarrassingly easy to read. She hates that he can make her feel like this. So vulnerable. 

Their intense staring match is getting a little uncomfortable, but it seems that both have forgotten that anyone else is in the room.

Finally, Minho interjects. "Hi, I'm Choi Minho. We've probably met on a set before, but you may have forgotten." 

Good naturedly, he extends his other hand to Changmin, who glowers at him before grasping it in a tight handshake.

"No, I remember you. You're the prop boy right?" Changmin says, his voice still unfailingly polite.

Minho's eyes narrow, recognizing that Changmin is challenging him. Not one to back down, the younger man squeezes back. 

"Yup, that's me. Joohyun, why don't we go get a drink. Nicole, if you'll excuse us?"

Joohyun smiles at him gratefully and Nicole just nods, a little confused by what just happened.

Changmin watches them leave and bitterly has to admit that Minho won that round.

-------------------------------------------

"Scotch, on the rocks" he says, signaling the bartender. 

"Coming right up sir"

He leans against the bar, and surveys the scene in front of him. Same old crowd, wearing their diamonds and suits, gossiping about the same old subjects. Then there's her. She stands out, like a rose among the dandelions, with her simple hair and limited make up. She's effortlessly beautiful and he's only watching her now. 

He watches as she spins around the dance floor with that boy she brought. In one swift motion he gulps down his drink and slams the glass on the bar.

"Woah, take it easy there." a sultry female voice says to his left. 

Although he gives no indication of acknowledging her, she still persists and drapes herself on his arm. 

"Baby, why so glum? Come play."

"Take a hint and find someone else." He growls out.

Standing up, he shakes her off and stalks away. Maybe it's the alcohol talking, but he's in no mood for another mindless night in a stranger's bed.

He notices she's by herself finally. Minho must have gone off to find some drinks for them. Walking up behind her, he wraps his arm around her waist and drags her with him before she has a chance to make a sound.

He pulls her into an alcove in the back so they are barely visible. 

Blocking the exit with his body, he asks her in a low voice, "Joohyun, how have you been?"

She glares at him, a little incredulous that he pulled this stunt just to make small talk. 

"Good, I'm good." she says, not giving away anything.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

This is most likely the most inane conversation they've ever had. But with the mess of emotions both are feeling, every word feels like a strategic move in a game of chess. 

"I'm good too." He says, although she didn't ask.

He leans in, trying to read her. But her face is impassive and it's like they're back at square one again. Their relationship has become one giant game of chicken where the first to blink loses.

She frustrates him in every way. 

"." He gives in and kisses her deeply, one hand one the back of her neck, pulling her in so her body is flush against his and he can sink into those curves he's missed so much. 

She gasps in surprise and he takes advantage, delving into with his tongue. He kisses her thoroughly and possessively, with a passion that she realizes she's been craving all this time. 

She wants him. Badly. Her hands cling to his jacket and the room could be on fire and she wouldn't care. 

He breaks away only to tell her in an husky whisper, "Let's get out of here. You and me. We can charter a flight, go to Jeju and spend the weekend."

She looks at him blankly, the haze finally clearing from her head. 

"We can't do that. I came with Minho." She states firmly.

He growls, "So ditch Minho, I don't like that guy."

Joohyun is in disbelief. "It doesn't matter if you don't like him. He's my date."

She turns her head to look over his shoulder, trying to look for said date and infuriating Changmin even more.

He knows exactly what she's implying. He has no hold on her just like she has no hold on him; they are not exclusive unless he wants to take that step. But is he willing to give it all up? That free, hedonistic lifestyle he's so accustomed to just like that?

"I don't like you with him." He says, forcing her attention back to him.

"What do you want from me then?" She asks, tired of the push and pull game they're playing.

He realizes this is his chance. His chance to tell her he's played all his cards and is willing to take a gamble on love. That he wants to be with her and only her. 

He opens his mouth and she looks at him expectantly, hoping that he is not still the same man she first met. 

But the words fail him and in the end, all he can say is, "I don't know."

She can't hide the disappointment in her eyes as she nods and pushes past him. This time, he doesn't try to stop her.

"I don't know what you want either." She walks away, not looking back.

He watches as she rejoins Minho and they leave together soon after. He punches a wall and doesn't remember how he got home that night.

 

We belong together
When you left
I lost a part of me
It's still so hard to believe
Come back baby please
We belong together
 

"Nicole, where is she?" he asks, giving the blonde sitting across from him a pleading look.

She sighs and takes a long sip of her hot chocolate. "You know I can't tell you Changmin, I'm sorry."

"But she's not picking up, she's not at her house, and no one I know has seen her in the past two days! Logically, the next place I should go is to the police." he says, moving to stand up and leave.

Nicole's eyes widen and she grabs his arm, pulling him back. "No! Ok, ok - I'll tell you. Just sit down first."

She gives the other customers at the cafe an apologetic look for the disturbance they caused before fixing Changmin with a sympathetic gaze.

"Joohyun got a call from a researcher at the University of Melbourne two weeks ago. It was an opportunity for her to travel with the research team as their field photographer." Nicole takes another deep breath before continuing. "The assignment is in South America." 

"South America!" He grips the table, unable to contain his reaction.

She nods. "She told me not to tell you, because she's really hurting Changmin. And I don't think you can blame her."

He is at a loss for words. Because she is right and he can do nothing about it now. Regret is not a feeling he is familiar with, but right then, Changmin can think of a hundred different things he wishes he did differently.

The first was that he never told her he loved her.

 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Epilogue ~ 3 weeks later:

A lone girl stands on the precipice of a cliff, dusting her hands off and checking her balance carefully before pulling her camera up to her eyes.

She takes exactly five photos of the morning sunrise and then sits down to take a drink. 

Joohyun is proud of herself. The last few weeks have been physically and mentally strenuous, but ultimately rewarding. If someone had told her 3 months ago that she would find a new meaning to life in the rain forests of Costa Rica, she would have laughed and asked them to see a doctor. But here she is, enjoying the fruits of her early morning hike and not regretting her decision to join Dr. Henderson and his team at all. 

The fresh air and complete change of setting have allowed her to put things in perspective. Although the old wounds are still there, they are healing and she is wiser now. She hasn't allowed herself to wallow in self pity.

A snap of a twig nearby alerts her that she is not alone. Her research team knows her whereabouts but she is still cautious. Before she can stand though, a person appears in front of her and it is the one person in the world she had no expectation of seeing.

Changmin brushes the hair out of his eyes and winces as he trips over a rock. 

"Joohyun, did you really have to go to the other side of the world, separated by two oceans, and god knows how many miles to get away from me?" He says, sweating and panting for breath but somehow still looking like he's modeling sportswear for an ad campaign. 

She gapes at him. "You! You're not real... Right? I'm hallucinating- I've been out in the sun too long." 

She pinches herself on the arm as he watches, amused. 

"I'm real Joohyun, but it's nice to know you've been dreaming of me coming to get you." He jokes.

This does not comfort her. She stands up and looks like she's ready to bolt, down a mountain if need be.

He notices her intention and sweeps her up in a hug, binding her arms to her side so the chances of escape are eliminated.

"Changmin!"

"Just one second Joohyun. I just need one second of your time." He asks. 

When she stays silent, he takes this as permission to continue.

"I'm going to let you go now, if you promise to not run away, ok?" He says slowly, to make sure she complies.

She nods and he releases her gently. 

"Here, let's sit down." Changmin plops down on large rock and invitingly pats the spot next to him. 

She stares at him and decides to remain where she is. He accepts this as a good enough truce for the time being. They sit for a few minutes in complete silence with only the occasional sounds of the forest around them. 

"Joohyun-ah," Changmin says, finally breaking the silence, "I'm sure you're wondering why I came all this way and how in the world I found you. Well, let's just say it was not without some difficulty, but I persevered. I had to see you again." 

He looks into her eyes and hopes she believes him. Hopes beyond hope that he isn't too late.

She seems unmoved but at least she's listening. 

"I know that I didn't deserve you -  it was quite obvious from the beginning. But I want to now. I want to become someone you can trust, someone that will make you happy. Joohyun, I'll ask you again, and I promise that this is the last time, will you give me a chance?"

She bites her lower lip, considering his offer. Truthfully, she is impressed by his grand gesture - coming to Costa Rica is no small feat. But it isn't enough.

"A chance?" she responds, following the script from that conversation long ago in the dark room.

He tries to contain his happiness.

"A chance to start over. I want to meet you again Joohyun-ah, and do all those things I should have done in the first place. Like bringing you flowers, going out on dates, and helping you make pancakes in the mornings. I want there to be an us." 

She stands up abruptly, and worriedly, he does the same. But instead of leaving like he feared she would, she walks up to him and says quietly with a small smile, "It's nice to meet you, I'm Seo Joo Hyun." 

He grins, eyes lighting up. "Nice to meet you too. I'm Shim Changmin." 

She nods, "It's a wonderful view, isn't it?"

He agrees. "Yes. And I see you must be a photographer. Did you know Joohyun-ssi, that I sometimes work with photographers?"

She feigns surprise. "Oh? Really?"

"Yes, it's part of my line of work. I'd love to tell you more about it over coffee. Do you have time this morning?" he asks.

"Hm, I think coffee sounds lovely."

"Good, I know a great place. If you'll follow me -" he says, and extends a hand to her.

She interlaces her fingers with his and laughs. "Oppa, how is that possible? You just got here."

He pretends to be shocked. "Oppa? Isn't that a little forward of you Joohyun-ssi? After all, we just met."

She hits his arm lightly. "Don't push it Changmin."

He laughs, "Yes Ma'm"

The two make their way down the mountain hand-in-hand, ready to rediscover what it meant to be together. 

 

--------------------------------------------------

Author's Note:

I'm sorry, so sorry guys. March was brutal. And April wasnt much better. I was working on this story every spare second (over half was probably written on my IPhone  - _ -' )

So how do we like playboy Changmin and photographer Seohyun?  :D

Their relationship is messier than what I usually come up with, so it was much more interesting for me to write at least. Which probably explains the long length. My oneshots always turn into monstrosities TT