Real Men Cry

Jihoon was a man. Men were not supposed to cry.  Men were the epitome of strength, power, and authority; not vulnerability, weakness, and inferiority. So why was it that Jihoon, who believed so solely in the superiority of man's role, was bawling his eyes out, leaving no space to properly breathe? Why was it that his breath was constantly hitching, and why was it that he felt so broken? Why was it that he felt his body was being torn apart into shreds? Why was it that he felt like such a girl, so vulnerable? Men weren't supposed to cry. And Jihoon was a man; meaning he was not allowed to cry. So why was he?

Jihoon struggled to keep his tears in tact, but the second he saw her concerned expression, he broke down, only to fall even further apart as she wrapped her feeble arms around him. He couldn't fight the woe that was pricking at his heart; he felt like a shattered dream, broken in every place with no hope left for him to restore his heart. He closed his eyes and all he saw were nightmares of him being helpless and weak, meek with no success in his future; but it was worse when he opened his eyes, just to come face to face with her distorted expression, tainted with worry and anxiety that he has come to cause her.

He felt hurt, betrayed, and he felt used.

But there was something in her soft touch that restored the warmth in his quivering frame; in her arms, he felt whole and there was a spark of hope glimmering above his head. He nuzzled his nose into the crook of her neck, resting his arms lightly around her waist; he settled in listening to her steady breathing, focused on her soothing coos and listened to her consoling crooning. She cradled him, smoothed out the knots in his hair and shoulders and rocked him gently, feeling her own heart wrench at the ptiful sight of her lover. Jihoon felt her feathery lips brush past his lips and instantly a heated flush rushed to his cheeks, staining his pallor with a reddish hue.

She smiled gently, pressing her lips to his hair as she rubbed his large back with her petite hand. Moving, she laid Jihoon's head upon her lap and looked down at him, watching him cast secretive glimpses of her through the strands of his disheveled hair. She brushed the wisps of blonde back and rubbed her gentle fingertips under his eyes, wiping any any excess tears. "Don't cry anymore," she whispered earnestly, trailing her finger down the side of his cheek. "You're more handsome when you smile."

And instinctively, he smiled a ghost of a smile, his lips twitching upwards merely at the sight of her angelic features. Relief washed over her expression at his positive response, and her hands ran through the locks of his golden hair, her lips parting as she exhaled a gentle, inaudible breath. Jihoon stopped her when she moved to rise, his eyes suddenly yearning for her to stay. "Please let me stay here with you," he whispered, a childish pout already in the process of forming. "At least until I fall asleep?"

She brushed his hair back behind his ear and giggled softly, "I thought men don't need to fall asleep in their girlfriend's laps all the time." Her tone was joking and playful, and it made Jihoon grin foolishly, his teeth showing as his lips spread further apart in mirth.
"Well, I'm a special type of man, aren't I?" he returned, just as playfully.
"You sure are."

She beamed as he lifted his head to capture her lips in a kiss; it was small, but contained so many emotions -- a mixture of gratitude, love, affection, and warmth. He pulled back slowly, a satisfied smile painting his lips as he pressed his forehead to hers, his hand moving to cup her blushing cheek. "Do you realize how grateful I am to be able to come home to someone like you every night?" he whispered, his hot breath ghosting just above her lips.
She nodded her head, with a small smile. "I think I'm more grateful to have you return home to me, rather than the other way around."
"Ridiculous," Jihoon shot back argumentatively. He kissed her once more and laid his head back down upon her lap, sighing contently at the comfort.

A tranquil silence ensued and followed Jihoon's calming breaths. He was on the brink of slumber when he felt her supple lips press against his forehead, the soft sensation sending tingles throughout his body as he heard her mumble slightly against his flushed skin, "I love you, Jihoonie."

He grinned softly, moving with the last bit of exhausted strength he had left to intertwine their fingers together.

His smile only grew as he felt her hands wrap around his tenderly, affectionate little pecks being scattered across the pads of her fingertips. "Sleep well, Jihoon."

"I love you, too, noona."

Thank you for taking care of me.

And the last words of the night that Jihoon had barely caught before drifting off to his dreams, were the most encouraging of them all:

"Don't be afraid to cry in front of me, Jihoonie. Real men cry, and tonight you have proved to me, more than anyone I've ever met, that you are a true man."