The words simply wouldn’t come. Tears flowed seamlessly down his cheeks, spattering the page, making it go limp in his hands. Key knew exactly what he wanted to say, but he just couldn’t bring himself to write it down properly. He wished his feelings would seep through his fingers and cover the page. Nothing came.

 Giving up, he threw his pen and notebook across the room, where they clattered loudly onto the floor, probably leaving a mark. Onew would get him for that later. He shrank into a tiny capsule of pain, closed in on himself, attempting to keep the world at bay.

 Soft footsteps entered the room. Key would know that noise anywhere. Jonghyun.

 “Key? What -you -what’s going on?”

 “Nothing,” he replied stubbornly through his tears.

 The older boy sat down on the bed, right next to Key, making it difficult for him to think. Difficult for him to breathe. “Key, I know something’s wrong,” he said in a low voice. “Tell me, or so help me I will make you. And it won’t be pretty. So just tell- ”

“GO AWAY!” Key exploded. I love you and I don’t know how to tell you! Key wanted to scream. He wanted to pour all of his emotions and affection out to Jonghyun. But he just couldn’t.

 Jonghyun tried to reach out to him. He lashed out at his elder, trying to knock his arms away, quickly becoming hysterical. Loud, ragged gasps came tearing out of his airways, his chest heaving with angry sobbing.

 How bitterly ironic, he thought, that the person I need so much is you, yet I’m fighting to keep you away.

 “Key! What’s the problem?” Jonghyun was really getting worried now.

 You are.

 Jonghyun’s best friend was usually so composed, so above it all. Only now did those pretenses fall away, revealing the weak, fragile child behind the strong façade. In that moment the shuddering boy on the bed was so innocent. He looked…breakable. Something was up.

 Seeing that there wasn’t too much he could do without being clawed at, but not wanting to leave Key’s side, he sat and let Key cry himself out, rubbing his shoulders and saying, “You’re fine, Key. I can help you. You’re fine,” over and over again. This time Key permitted Jonghyun to touch him. Eventually, Key fell into a fitful asleep, his mouth still turned downwards into a frown, eyebrows knitted tightly together. There were visible tear tracks on his face.

 Jonghyun covered the boy up and proceeded to his own bed across the room. Turning away from Key, he whispered, “I will find out, Kibum. And when I do, I’ll fix it.”

 He was going to regret those words.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ahem. Why is this so depressing?

Bear with me it could get worse but it definitely won't end that way.