He whispers something against her ear as she looks away from him. His hands tie around her frail waist and she shivers by his touch. However the feeling that something just isn’t right chains her in bitterness and she attempts to get out of his grasp. "Please." She bites her lower lip. "Stop."

The charming man watches her and frowns.

It started happening a month ago—the two of them breaking apart inch by inch. Perhaps the spark just died out; sure the couple had arguments here and there but there was no reason for them to lose their love for one another.

"Baerim, I don’t know what I did but I’m sorr—" By then the woman had got out of his hands, and backs a step away from him.

"It’s not your fault, Woohyun." It’s hard for her to swallow down her words, and it’s even harder when she says, "It’s us."

The two of them stand across from another and stare into the depths of one another’s eyes. Woohyun can’t understand her expression and it makes him scowl in frustration. No words are shared and for a while, they let the silence overtake them.

It’s so hard. So hard to accept that maybe, just maybe, they’re tired of each other.

　

It’s foggy but the clouds that cover the city are transcendent, so the citizens get the glorious chance to see the azure sky beyond their reach. The weather’s numbing and it gives no choice but for those wandering out to wear scarves and mittens. A few birds pass by and Baerim watches them in discontent. She wonders if this is what it feels like to be in a mid life crisis, although she’s just barely started her college life.

"Hey." A guy with light brown hair, a familiar face, smiles at her. "You okay?"

She tilts her head and grins. "Why wouldn’t I be?"

"Because you’re crying."

Baerim widens her eyes in surprise at how blunt this is and touches her cheeks. She frowns when finding him right. How did she not notice the tears? "I guess I am." The girl brings a sleeve and wipes her face before looking back at him. "Jinyoung, what brings you by here?"

The two of them are at the park and it makes Baerim marvel at how she can encounter one of her busy college classmates here. To be honest, she had purposely came to the park to stay away from everyone. Besides, staying in the covers of her house was getting exhausting.

" Was passing by and saw you here and figured that I’d stop by and say hi. Seems like I came at the perfect timing." The smile plastering his face awes Baerim at how innocent he is, and it makes her disappointed that Woohyun isn’t the same. Before she can continue on pointing out all that crap, she shoos them away.

"Or maybe the worst timing." Baerim laughs and adds on, "I’m just kidding."

Jinyoung turns his lips to a fine line before plopping himself on down right next to her. The two of them sit in a bench and watch the adventures in the park for the time being as they entertain themselves with what’s going on. The laughter of children on the playground warms their ears, but at the same time, the sight of couples cuddling all over the damn place makes them sick to their stomachs. After realizing how awkward it is when the two of them both observe a couple sitting by a tree, Jinyoung coughs in discomfort. He checks the time. "Do you wanna go out and eat?"

Baerim turns her head at him and shakes her head. "Sorry, I didn’t bring any money on me. Maybe next time?"

However the man isn’t satisfied with that answer and grabs her hand. "My treat!"

He drags her up in longing to fill his stomach, and for a new found feeling growing inside him. "There’s no possible way you can miss out on free dinner!"

Baerim chuckles and shrugs. "I don’t know. Just letting you know, I eat a hell lot."

An even wider smile appears on Jinyoung’s face and it makes her smile as well. "No way. You’re so skinny though!"

She grabs his hand and the two of them run for it. "You’ll see!"

　　

It’s dark by now and as they walk out and open on the streets, their breath huff out puffs of fog. It’s the last day for last minute Christmas shopping and it makes Baerim grow cold with envy when glances at a group of teenagers rushing to fill their friends’ stockings. Memory flashes in her mind at the days when she was just like that. That’s when realization hits her hard with a brick and she gulps in alarm. "Today’s Christmas."

Jinyoung nods his head and looks at her. He’s stuffed to the very centimeter of his insides and it makes him all the same happy at his money well spent for food. "No duh. You didn’t know?" The man puzzles at how someone can forget a date so important.

"What? You knew? Why did you spend it with me then?" Baerim places a firm hand over his shoulder in instinct. She contemplates at him and then does she realize how gorgeous he actually is.

The man simply smiles in reserve and exhales a sigh she can’t make out. There’s this particular silence between the two of them and Baerim catches on what’s really happening. Guilt pins her with needles. "I’m so sorry, but I can’t."

Jinyoung smirks in understanding and looks up into the sky. "Feelings can’t be helped." He diverts his attention back to her. "Go."

At that moment, Baerim quickly gives him a hug before sprinting back.

　

 

It’s only nine, but with all the panic and sheer impatience going on in her mind, it feels like the day had already ended without her knowing. Baerim can only hope that he’s still at the apartment. Her legs pain with having to run so long with such tight flats and it makes the poor girl whine in agony. It’s like high school all over again.

She tugs herself the remaining block and relief pounds her when she makes it to her door room. All she wants to do is tell him how she feels.

However everything happens too fast for her brain to soak in when she gets slammed into the wall right after closing the door. Baerim whimpers in pain and glares at him. His expression is full of hurt, disgust. "What the are you doing? Who do you think you are!" She spits the words even with the burn scarring her back.

Woohyun scoffs a sound one would do in disbelief. It makes Baerim confused and at the same time, repulsed at his sudden behavior. He’s never shown this side before. "Look who’s the one talking." His eyes penetrate through her own and it makes Baerim feel pinned down, but she knows she has nothing to hide.

"I don’t know what you’re talking about, and I’m sure I’m gunna get a laugh out of what you’re gunna say."

An anger boils inside of Woohyun and he can feel the pressure to throw everything away spoil him. He grinds his teeth in thought that his own girlfriend might be mocking him. The fact is unacceptable and he slams her against the wall, pinning the slender girl to both sides. His lips meet hers in hate and it makes Baerim widen her eyes in shock.

She pushes him away and slaps him across the face. It’s an instinct she didn’t mean to do and before she gets the chance to apologize, Woohyun pushes her to the bed. "Why are you doing this?" Her voice beckons to him in panic and she struggles to get up against his weight.

His lips trail against her neck in lust and Baerim quivers at how he’s acting. Tears start overwhelming her eyes and the next thing she knows, her tears become sobs and she chokes down her fears. Woohyun gulps at what he’s just done and gets up. He tries to caress her cheek but Baerim squirms her face away from his hand. "In your eyes I’m probably a monster, aren’t I?" It only comes out as a whisper, but it’s enough for Baerim to make out.

Woohyun gets off the bed and turns around in a mix of shame and utter guilt. "I saw you with Jinyoung today. What...what were you doing with him?"

The scared girl stifles her sobs and stares at him now in a new understanding. It’s both of their faults for all this mess. Baerim slowly gets up and stands in front of him. She gently holds both his hands and shakes her head. Now’s the time to say what she needed to say. "I’m sorry. I know we’re both sorry. I thought that we died out—like an old flame slowly wilting, but I’m wrong. Woohyun." Their eyes meet. "I was with Jinyoung today, and I found myself thinking about you the entire time. It was aggravating. But it made me realize, how much I love you."

Her lips meet his in moment’s grace and Woohyun smiles. He brings his hands to her waist, and for a second, breaks the kiss.

 

"Merry Christmas."