“Can I roll down the window, Sir?”

“Sure,” Sunggyu said. He glanced wistfully at Sungjong’s hand, which rested comfortably on the edge of his seat. It couldn’t be more than a feet away from him but he couldn’t just reach out and take his hand. Not today, not ever.

The question might arise, why he would want to hold Sungjong’s hand – the answer was simple – he was in love with Sungjong, his personal assistant. Yes, Sungjong was his special one. Not only because he loved him but also because Sungjong was…special. He was breathtakingly beautiful (Sunggyu was sure that God had been in an exceptionally good mood when He had made Sungjong) cocky, had a terrible attitude, took ridiculously long vacations even though he was a new employee, knew nothing about the world (he had said English was an American language during the interview; Sunggyu hadn’t asked any more questions after that) and he knew some kind of voodoo. How else would you explain why Sunggyu had hired him out of all the 73 candidates that had turned up? Why he hadn’t fired him yet despite him being extremely difficult to deal with? Or why, even though Sunggyu knew everything about him, he wanted to actually commit himself to him entirely?

Although Sungjong was sometimes a total pain to have around, Sunggyu was in love with him.

He had been in love with him for the past 274 days out of the 283 days he had known him, though he had still remained pretty much a mystery to him. It had taken him 7 days to fall in love with Sungjong, including the day of the interview. He had an impressive appearance, despite the lack of experience (he tried not to think about the actual interview because Sungjong’s answers had been ridiculous – apparently polar bears lived in Africa and gazelle was a type of drug)and Sunggyu had hired him because he thought that an aesthetically pleasing PA would really improve his workplace (of course Sungjong’s magic or whatever it had been was in work). And after 6 working days, he had realized that he had fallen in love with this very aesthetically pleasing PA.

And the other two days when he didn’t love Sungjong had been two exceptionally bitter days when Sungjong’s ugly side had burst forth. Sunggyu was a perfectionist and when he had told Sungjong to type a letter for the 6^th time (maybe he was being a bit too unreasonable) a wild Sungjong had broken free and he had told Sunggyu to his face that he wouldn’t do it and he even called him by his name. Now Sunggyu was a patient man – although the matter was arguable – but when a 4-year old younger subordinate called him, “Sunggyu!” he couldn’t really love him. At least he hadn’t sacked him.

The second occasion was when Sungjong had unleashed his wrath on a client who had probably said something to offend him. Sunggyu didn’t know the whole story but he had been forced out of his room into the reception by Sungjong’s high-pitched voice uttering a string of street curses that baffled him completely. Sungjong had managed to scare off the rest of the clients for that day and Sunggyu had been frowning the whole day.

But apart from that, Sunggyu had loved Sungjong every other day. If he hadn’t then Sungjong wouldn’t be his PA still now.

He insisted on dropping Sungjong off every night after work and Sungjong didn’t protest because who would say no to free rides. He wanted to confess to his PA on one of these nights. Well he could easily confess, but he wanted it to be romantic, like a movie. He hoped that one day, he would be able to hold Sungjong’s hand in the car - Sungjong would turn and look into his eyes, and at that moment, they would realize that they were in love with each other (although Sunggyu already knew that), that they were meant to be and it would end in a kiss leading to their wedding and honeymoon and...etc.

The plan was perfect according to Sunggyu, except one minor glitch. Ok, one used-to-be minor glitch turned to a major glitch – he just couldn’t find the courage to take Sungjong’s hand. He had been trying for 250 days now, always ticking off the days in his head, but he was still nowhere close to Sungjong’s hand, resultantly his heart.

Sunggyu was getting impatient – if he couldn’t do it, someone else definitely would and all his hopes, dreams and wishes would go down the drain and he would have absolutely no one to blame it on. Well, he could blame it on Sungjong – the younger had never realized his feelings for him. But even to him, the excuse sounded lame.  

The next night marked the special night – Sunggyu would do it, he was determined. As they sped across the roads, Sunggyu kept on continuously glancing at Sungjong’s hand. It rested on the edge of his seat again but there was a new accessory adorning his ring finger.

“What’s that?” Sunggyu asked. Sungjong saw what Sunggyu was looking at.

“A ring,” he answered briefly.

“It looks like a wedding band,” Sunggyu said suspiciously.

“It is.”

Something cracked irreparably within Sunggyu, who braked hard. There was a screeching noise as both the driver and the passenger were thrown forward with amazing force.

If it weren’t for their seatbelts, both Sunggyu and Sungjong would be flying high by now.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing? You could have killed me! I can’t believe you value my life so less you jerk, you-”

A string of curses followed. Yeah, that happened when you made Sungjong unhappy. He couldn’t care less that he was talking to his boss. An unhappy Sungjong was a rampant one. Sunggyu could feel his love trying to escape out of the window – after all, who liked to be badmouthed by a 4 year younger subordinate – but he grabbed it back and put it in place.

“You got married?” Sunggyu cut across Sungjong. The crack was growing.

“No!” The crack shrank a bit.

“But you said it’s a wedding band!”

“It is!”

“Then -”

“It’s a wedding band but I never said it’s mine.” Sungjong was still fuming but Sunggyu felt the crack across his heart mending.

“Oh um…”

“You’re holding up the traffic.”

Sure enough, cars were honking in the background. Sunggyu started to drive.

“So whose is it?” Sunggyu asked conversationally, checking his tone. He had raised his voice before.

“My dad’s.”

Sunggyu could tell Sungjong was still pissed off. But he had to hold his hand, he just had to. It was there -barely a feet away from him. He chose to act when they were stuck at a traffic signal. He pushed his hand forward with all his mind and heart – just a bit more – and –

He had done it.

He felt Sungjong’s hand in his. They were holding hands. Sungjong turned to face him with a surprised look – this was the epic moment, when they (Sungjong) would realize they were in love. It would be followed by a big wedding and a honeymoon to a fancy island – this was what he had been waiting for –

“Why are you holding my hand?”

“I – the hand – romantic –”

Sunggyu felt as if someone had kicked him in the gut. No, he felt as if someone had pushed him off the 70^th floor. He was plummeting downwards from cloud nine or whatever cloud he had been in this long.

“I love you,” he said, lamely. That was his last resort. Ok, second and last resort.

Sungjong rolled his eyes.

“Really? That’s um…that’s news to me.” Was it just Sunggyu or his PA looked embarrassed for the first time? Wait, was it embarrassment or shyness – the pink on his cheeks was spreading fast.

“So will you marry me? So that we can go to a fancy island for our honeymoon?” Sunggyu had no idea that he’d actually blurt out his plan like that. It sounded so awkward and unromantic.

“Um – isn’t this very sudden?” Sungjong asked.

“No – I mean yes – I mean no – I had it planned all along.”

“And what made you think I’d agree?”

Sunggyu blinked stupidly. He hadn’t prepared for these questions. They were not supposed to arise in the first place because –

“That’s where the hand came in. When we held hands you -”

“Drive.” Sungjong sighed. Sunggyu obeyed him. He was very confused. He couldn’t remember what he had said to Sungjong and what he hadn’t. His mind was boggled.

When he reached Sungjong’s apartment complex, he turned off the ignition which he usually kept running. Their goodnights were short usually, but today, there was an unresolved issue between them.

“So – about the marriage…”

“I had 25 minutes to think on the way. I thought about saying no for 12 minutes and about saying yes for 12 minutes.” Sungjong paused. His eyes were fixed ahead.

“And what about the remaining one minute?”

Sungjong finally turned towards him.

“I was thinking you’re not very bright.”

“What? I’m the best attorney in Seoul and -”

“And you took 250 days to tell me you love me.”

So Sunggyu hadn’t been the only one counting.

“274,” he corrected him nonetheless.

“You’d fallen in love earlier than I had reckoned?”

“How did you know?” Sunggyu asked skeptically. As far as he was concerned, he hadn’t let out any signs, not intentionally.

“I counted from the day you started to give me lifts. You would keep looking at me all the time. I mean of course a lot of people do that but you didn’t fire me when I said you were a beaver-nosed, hamster-cheeked, beetle eyed raccoon -”

“Ok, you don’t need to repeat that.” Sunggyu tried to put the love that was on the verge of escaping deeper into its pocket. He took a deep breath.

“So,” he breathed out through his mouth. “What about it then? The marriage I mean.” Sunggyu cleared his throat and cursed himself for not bringing a ring. It would have been so much more…romantic.

“I’m not a very nice person,” Sungjong admitted.

“Trust me, I know. You know more curses than -” Sunggyu said before he could stop himself.

“I might use them on you,” Sungjong said sadly, looking down. He pouted unconsciously and the love inside Sunggyu stopped struggling.

“Well, there will be a significant dent on my dignity but I can live with that. But can’t you try and be nice to…”

“No!”

That was straight-forward enough.

“It’s fine,” Sunggyu said quickly. If he put Sungjong in a bad mood then they would have a trial run right there and then.

Sungjong sighed again.

“Yes I’ll marry you.”

Sunggyu’s heart soared. He felt himself climbing back to cloud nine again. Actually, a cloud higher than nine.

He leant forward to kiss Sungjong, who moved away. He got out quickly.

“Don’t you think it’s too soon?” he said playfully and with a wave, left.

Sunggyu was left dumbfounded. It was too early to kiss the person you were getting married to?

Sunggyu realized that his special one was a mystery he would need quite some time to figure out.