Himchan sat on the bed for a while, remembering what Hyunmin said a while ago.

 

 

     "Himchan-ahh, she fought to survive from a heart disease."

 

 

     HEART DISEASE.

 

 

     He got hurt while thinking of that phrase.

 

 

     He haven't helped her before. He even didn't know it. He was being selfish. Why didn't he bother to ask her or check ? As he was thinking, tears had filled his eyes and soon, it started rolling down on his cheeks.

 

 

     He took out the CD from the pocket of his sweater.

 

 

     Even though he doubted what might be inside the CD, he though, maybe it'll explain everything. Maybe he will discover what had really happened before.

 

 

     He inserted the CD and after a short time of buffering, the content played.

 

 

     The movie showed a blurr image at first.

 

 

     "Unnie, make it faster or else I'll forget my speech." the voice on the video stated, and Himchan recognized it as Sunjae's.

 

 

     Then the image got clearer.

 

 

     It was Sunjae. She was in a hospital dress. She looked pale ; but her smile never left her face.

 

 

     He miss her face without any enhancements or make-up. The face that meets his eyes every morning before.

 

 

     She cleared . "Annyeong Himchan-ahh. My Kim Himcha. My handsome Channie. My derp Channie." she said brightly on the video, then she became sad again. "Oh, erase it. You're not mine anymore. Haha."

 

 

     Despite the bitter content of her so-called speech she still laughed while filming.

 

     

     "Himchan-ahh, how old are you now ? 25 ? 26 ? Aigoo. I told Unnie to give this to you 3 years later. If not, I'll haunt her. Haha."

 

 

     "Stop it, Sunjae. You're not dying." another voice said, probably it was Hyunmin's.

 

 

     "Aniyo. I am. Okay ?" Sunjae protested.

 

 

     There was silence.

 

 

     Himchan sobbed. He was a sobbing mess. The truth is .... she still has a place in his heart. A veru big space.

 

 

     "Himchan babo. You didn't even followed me when I walked out on that day." she pouted.

 

 

     Himchan can't help but to slightly chuckle with what Sunjae called him. He needed to smile. At least it won't bring him totally in tears.

 

 

      Himchan can't help but to slightly chuckle with what Sunjae called him. He needed to smile. At least it won't bring him totally in tears.

 

 

     "You know how much I loved you. You selfish derp. You even didn't force me to tell you the reason why i broke up with you. You knew how I love it when you force me .... in a cute way. With aegyo ! Haha." Sunjae chuckled.

 

 

     Himchan's heart is in pieces now.

 

 

     "Plus flooding my mail is a no no !" she whined. "Hyunmin unnie got tired of deleting thos 'Hi' 'Hello' messages."

 

 

     "I'm sorry Sunjae." Himchan uttered between sobs.

 

 

     "Himchan-ahh, I'm sorry I didn't tell you the truth." she paused for a while with a sudden sadness in her face. "You know, I already have this ailment since I was born. I have a very very weak heart. I didn't know why I still fell in love. Haha." Sunjae continued. "This is the reason why I can't go to our dates oftentimes. You would even complain and ask if Unnie is a bedridden person because I would always say that Unnie needs my help as an excuse."

 

 

     "Wae ???" Himchan whispered, cursing himself.

 

 

     "Himchan-ahh, how's your career ? I bet you are so much successful now. I always watch your performances on TV. And hey, you're the most handsome ! And Jongup is so amazing with his breakdances. Oh how I wish I could still see those." then she paused again. "I'm sorry if I wasn't there to witness it all. And I'm so much sorry if I still let myself show up to you after those years of forgetting me."

 

 

     "Is your girlfriend with you ? Aigoo, I should have fixed myself more. To Himchan's girlfriend, Hi there ! Take care of Himchan okay ? Don't make him fat, he would be the ugliest if he will grow fat. Hahaha." Sunjae said, brightening the mood.

 

 

     "Aish~ The video is so long now." she said, gritting her teeth.

 

 

     "Sunjae, the battery is- "

 

 

     "Aigoo. Wait unnie." then she faced the camcorder again and her sad face was focused.

 

 

     "I'm always on your side okay ? Himchan-ahh, I love you so much, more than my life. I was grateful to have you. But I know I lack so much so please forgive me." her eyes became teary but after the statement, she cried.

 

 

     The video stopped. Himchan stared at the blank screen, comprehending what he just watched and heard.

 

 

     He couldn't control his tears anymore.

 

 

     "I'm sorry."

 

 

 

  - END -

 

 

 

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N/A : It isn't supposed to end that way .. but I'm already out of words. haha, pardon me guys. I hope you like it. 

 

 

I comprehended the song "What My Heart Tells Me To Do" and that story popped up in the head.