CHAPTER FIFTEEN:Acceptance

Just when he thought he could make it until the end it happened. He was singing his last part when the coughing started. He wasn’t able to control it and even if he tried to calm it, the cough didn’t stop. The only thing that stopped was their rehearsal as everyone in the studio decided to approach him and see if they could help. SungGyu didn’t like the attention they were giving to him. He wasn’t that sick, he believed it was momentary.

“SungGyu-ya, are you okay?” their choreographer asked as he handled him his red bottle of water.

The leader simply nodded before drinking only to get choked with water as another cough got between his actions. SungJong patted his back with a worried expression on his face as he eyed his hyungs.

“I thought you got better after the medicines you took,” DongWoo dried his neck with a small towel while L took advantage of the interruption and sat on the floor close to the others. His sharp eyes looking tiredly at their leader.

“I am,” SungGyu finally managed to speak pushing away the maknae’s hand. “It’s really nothing.”

“He started coughing since dawn,” WooHyun decided to ignore his leader’s words getting a comprehensive nod from some members. “I thought he was doing it on purpose just to wake me up but I guess it really wasn’t like that.”

SungGyu rolled his eyes. “As if I would cough to wake you up.”

“And your voice is still raspy,” Hoya pointed out, ignoring his leader’s words too.

“It’s not,” SungGyu denied trying to erase all their worries but the way his voice sounded only made them question his word. Even their choreographer was looking at him doubtfully.

“I didn’t notice that before but it’s true,” Now it was DongWoo’s time to ignore his words.

“Will you listen to me?” SungGyu said louder.

“Are you just going through puberty, Hyung?” L asked with a straight face from the floor getting a loud laugh from WooHyun and DongWoo. SungJong tried hard not to as SungGyu’s eyes were fiercely looking at his.

“YAH!”

“And here we were worrying about him when it’s just that,” Hoya sighed in an exaggerated way creating more laughs before he walked back to his initial spot.

“Okay everyone,” the choreographer said after looking at HoWon’s actions. The time to play around with their leader was over. “Let’s do it again from the top before I record you. Get in your places and this time don’t cough.”

“Hyung,” SungGyu unconsciously pouted at the tease.

“I’m just saying,” The young man said with a grin. He couldn’t miss the chance to tease the younger man. “But you better go get a shot or something at the hospital. If I’m not wrong, this Sunday is your comeback.”

“I will,” SungGyu nodded as he walked between MyungSoo and HoWon.

Just as they got to their initial positions the door from the dance studio opened wide revelling Infinite’s manager. Geonam instantly called the choreographer’s name stopping him from playing Speechless. The half amused expression that was pasted on his lips called the youngsters’ attention. The manager’s eyes were looking intently at all the boys but stopped as they met SungGyu’s small eyes.

“Do you need something, Hyung?” The dancer asked getting a nod from the older man.

“Yes Haw, JungYeop-nim’s looking for SungGyu.”

It wasn’t unusual for Infinite’s leader to be called by Woollim’s CEO. Every week the managers from the different groups and other singers the company owned gathered with the director to talk about the important matters. Lee JungYeop paid attention to every detail. Like that, it was usual for him to call the leaders or the soloist to talk about how things were going or simply to bond. SungGyu, being the leader of Infinite, was able to transmit the group worries, their wishes, problems and suggestions. Apart from that SungGyu knew better than anyone else how things were going between the members so being asked how they were doing wasn’t something unusual.

“They fought last Friday,” SungGyu didn’t have to say their names since both troublemakers were well known by the CEO. The older man didn’t look surprised but he didn’t look worried either. “But they aren’t fighting anymore.”

“In other words, Hoya's completely avoiding WooHyun,” Lee JungYeop said getting a nod from the leader. “Did you talk with both of them?”

“I did but it’s hard for WooHyun to control his mouth so he keeps bothering him,” SungGyu looked to the floor before he cleared his dry throat. “Hoya’s been controlling himself pretty well but I don’t know how long will it take for him to explode again.”

“This isn’t the first time they are at it and it won’t be the last time either. Why can’t you fix their relationship—? I mean, Why can’t you handle WooHyun? He’s not that difficult and it's not like they never got along,” Even if JungYeop’s voice sounded calm. SungGyu knew it wasn’t a comprehensive comment. It meant he, as the leader, had failed doing his job. “I guess I’ll have to talk with him tomorrow.”

Yes, he had failed.

“I could talk with him again—”

“No. I will do it,” his eyes looked deep into SungGyu’s. He wasn’t eager to give him another chance.

“But, Hyung, I know WooHyun means no harm. It’s just that both want the best for the group but their ways of doing it are completely different so just let me—”

“SungGyu-ya,” The CEO stopped the young man’s words. “He’s not a teenager anymore so stop spoiling WooHyun.”

His eyes moved to the side as he found he couldn’t say a thing in his defence. JungYeop was right and he knew it.

“I’ll be harder on him.” SungGyu meant his words getting a nod from the man behind the desk.

“I’ll believe you when I see it,” JungYeop said letting his back touch the backrest of the leather office chair. “So that’s them. What about the others?”

“Hum,” SungGyu didn’t know exactly what to say. It took him a while to find an answer. “Well, the boys’ wounds are getting better. MyungSoo’s foot is taking longer but it’s fine. Also, he’s still with that quiet and slightly distant wall. Sometimes he manages to break L's barriers and jokes but it’s not often.”

As the years kept going it wasn't a secret in Woollim that MyungSoo had started to depend and actually live L's personality. He no longer divided his real self with L's whenever he wasn't in front of a camera or the media. It seemed he was now confused between both while other times he just hid himself behind it, using it as protection. After SungYeol's scandal MyungSoo had been deeply affected by it. For outsiders it was quite difficult to notice since the young man had secured himself behind L who was pretty good at hiding his feelings behind his unreadable features. Still, SungGyu had been the first one that had figured it out.

“MyungSoo breaks that barrier mainly with WooHyun. I believe their bond is getting stronger.”

“That’s good to listen. L has to stop depending so much on SungYeol.”

The word depending jumped a bit in SungGyu’s mind. It wouldn't have if the older man had used it for his dongsaeng's alter ego. But with SungYeol? He knew both of them had a special relationship but he never thought MyungSoo actually depended on SungYeol. In all, he believed L had a healthy and nice relationship with everyone in Infinite. He was someone no one could actually hate.

After controlling a cough, SungGyu continued.

“SungJong is getting more and more mature all thanks to his problematic hyungs,” SungGyu half smiled getting a playful snort from the CEO. “And DongWoo confessed me something interesting. I would be thankful if you could help him a bit with his desire.”

The man raised his eyebrows. It wasn’t usual for DongWoo to want something. “What is it?”

“He’s interested in acting. It’s the first time I’ve heard him say that but I know he means it,” SungGyu said knowing his words had surprised slightly the director. His eyebrows said it. “Could you please have his desire in mind?”

It took a while for JungYeop to start nodding before murmuring. “It might work,” Then he looked up at SungGyu’s orbs. “I’ll see what I can do about that. Thank you for telling me.”

“I just want to help.”

It was the leader’s obligation to express and transmit everything that was happening with the members in a group but SungGyu – feeling always in debt with the youngsters because of their compromise with the group – always tried to help them and find a way to make their director know. If he didn’t do it, who else could help them?

“You know? This is the first nice talk I had today,” The man leaned closer to his desk, his eyes never loosing contact with SungGyu’s. “Your comeback has to be great, you hear me? I need you guys to inject some energy to Woollim. Having JaeKung leaving Nell is crumbling the image of the label and I need the media to forget about that. Tasty's doing a good job but that’s not enough. You're Woollim's pride.”

“Yes, Hyung. I’ll give the kids no option but to give their best,” SungGyu answered in a convincing way trying to forget the pain he felt for Nell. After all he was a fan. “They have been working really hard with Wish Me Love and we’re real close to get Speechless completely synchronized thanks to Haw-hyung.” He couldn’t hide de excitement in his voice. “I have faith we’ll do a good job in our comeback.”

“Just concentrate on that SungGyu-ya.”

Said that JungYeop stood from his chair; the usual soft smile never leaving his features. His hands were pressing tight the glass desk. It was a pose he took whenever he was thinking. SungGyu had learnt that after some years of knowing him. He was sure the man was about to tell him something but it didn’t happen. A few moments later the phone sounded breaking the tight silence between both males. In a calm manner the CEO answered the phone.

“He’s back already? …then let him in.”

After he said that JungYeop hung up the phone. His eyes catching SungGyu’s distracted ones.

“Did you know that yesterday SungYeol’s case finally went on court?”

Every time SungGyu knew something more about SungYeol’s scandal he always ended up shocked at the magnitude of it. The young man was surprised at how just an instant could change someone’s life forever. One thing went to another and the problems kept on developing. People had accused the boy of murderer. He had been taken out of the reality without advice. He had left without finishing recording for their new album not knowing if he was going to be in their comeback. He had left the dorm with the uncertainty if he was ever going to come back to Infinite. And now he was finally going to the court with just one phone video as his only proof of innocence.

“How did it go?” SungGyu managed to ask hoping to get a good answer.

“I don’t even know,” Reality attacked the young man. “This is something that will take a lot of time, SungGyu. Not only some weeks but it might take months.”

“But there’s proof that he did nothing wrong,” The leader quickly added.

 “It’s not that simple,” JungYeop said letting him notice how young and innocent he was actually acting. SungGyu wasn’t a man to the world yet. Slowly, the CEO walked to where the young man was sitting. He placed a hand on SungGyu’s shoulder before speaking. “Don’t worry about it. I got lawyers and other people for that. You, on the other hand, have another job to do.”

The way the director spoke made Infinite’s leader feel nervous. Somehow he felt the big responsibility falling on his shoulders. He could only feel confused but SungGyu wasn’t able to ask as a knock on the door interrupted him from releasing his doubts.

“Come in.”

When the door opened SungGyu’s eyes couldn’t hide the surprise. Of all the people he imagined to appear behind the door, he never expected to see him there. Not yet. Many thoughts passed thru his already confused mind as he saw SungYeol walking inside the office. What was he doing there? Did he have an appointment with JungYeop? Had they been meeting before? Was his presence something good? Something to feel happy about? Or not? And why wasn’t SungGyu that happy about seeing him there?

“SungYeol,” He whispered as he eyed the younger boy better.

There was nothing different in his features. He seemed paler and slightly thinner but other than that he looked just like before. From his lively eyes to his unique standing, he was just the same. SungYeol was even wearing that half amused expression he used to carry everywhere. The trace of the lifeless look that had worried everyone in the dorms was completely gone. As if it had never existed.

“Good morning SungGyu-hyung,” SungYeol said with his controlled voice before greeting their CEO and accepting to take a seat next to the leader.

After some moments JungYeop decided to break the silence. “So. It’s been three weeks since you last saw each other, right?” The casual way the man said it made SungGyu doubtful whether to answer or not. Something big was coming and it obviously involved SungYeol.

“Yes. Three weeks and some days,” SungYeol answered after he eyed the silent leader.

“When do you have to go to court?”

It was then that SungYeol’s usual expression cracked. For a few moments SungGyu had believed the young boy was fine. Obviously he wasn’t. Those sad eyes and that sour grimace that he used to wear appeared proving he wasn’t fine. It was shown all thanks to that blunt question the CEO did. In SungGyu’s mind the question had been pretty rude but who was he to say something to the man? The only thing the leader could do was eye the young member from the side. If he turned around he was sure SungYeol was going to create that happy wall again. SungGyu didn’t feel he was supposed to presence that talk.

“I was called to be there this Friday.”

His voice was barely above a whisper but the older man acted as if it was nothing. He simply hummed before moving aside some papers that were in front of him. In the clean area JungYeop rested both arms. His perceptive eyes moved from one idol to the other. They said nothing. They simply waited for the CEO to decide to talk.

“I will make this short because I have other things to look at. And I believe what I’m going to say it’s pretty simple,” JungYeop started while his fingers played absent-mindedly with a fountain pen. “I called you both here because I’ve been thinking about the group. Just so you know SungGyu-ya, SungYeol and I had a talk a few days ago regardless his presence in Infinite. I won’t lie to you saying I didn’t have in mind to fire him. It’s not a secret. Everyone believed I was going to do that since it’s not the first time a member is kicked out of his group regardless the fame of it. Look at Jay Park,” The man snorted at his lame example. “But. After plenty of meetings, and other stuff you don’t need to know, I decided to give SungYeol a second chance.”  

He was a good man. A man that cared about his family and that showed his care for people but he wasn’t merciful. When it came to business, SungGyu knew Lee JungYeop would find the way to save his label. Woollim came first than them because idols could come and go, Woollim couldn’t. Infinite leader knew where they stood.

“If I’m being sincere, I believe the proof given by that Japanese women will save your career, SungYeol. I have faith in it you lucky brat,” JungYeop murmured the last part as he glared at the object in his hands. Suddenly his eyes rose to look at SungGyu. “So. I thought I shouldn’t let time pass because, seriously, I wanted the seven of you to perform in Inkigayo—I even thought about giving you another week so SungYeol could prepare! But it won’t be possible.”

Of course there had to be something bad in all those good news the CEO was giving to them. Everything seemed too perfect to be true. Knowing by their director’s mouth that SungYeol wasn’t going to leave Infinite had brightened SungGyu’s eyes. After listening to that the young man had instantly guessed they were going to do the comeback together. How fool SungGyu had been to think that. His shocked face betrayed him.

“What? You thought I was going to let him enter just like that? Well, I would but even if I pay for SungYeol to appear on TV they won’t let that happen because he’s still seen as a murderer. Nothing is settled yet and until that changes SungYeol will still be accused of that crime.”

The way their CEO explained them the situation created an uncomfortable sensation in SungGyu’s stomach. He was getting irritated. Sometimes the man could be really cold. He had no touch when talking.

“Can’t we wait for him?”  SungGyu controlled his voice.

“We can’t. Even if I did give you another week and even if the Forever Sevens and Inspirits sent letters and mails to the media, there are parents and people that aren’t content with SungYeol’s actions,” His voice carried once again that peaceful tone before he turned to look at the youngest idol. “Right now you, sir, are chained. And it won’t change until we get the law to accept your innocence. Then all that people will have to shut their mouths and accept your presence in the media.”

“But we can’t do the comeback just the six of us,” SungGyu kept insisting not wanting to accept their director’s words. Deep inside he knew the man was right but his heart wanted it to be different. “The kids won’t like this. They were excited about doing our comeback together.”

“It’s something JungYeop-hyung can’t fix, Hyung,” SungYeol murmured getting a hurt look from his leader and a sour nod from the older man.

“Yes, I can’t fix it. But you can be prepared,”  When the older man said that both males turned to look at him. “Lee SungYeol, what I need is for you to get ready. The moment I see is opportune to get you inside again I’ll make you do it so all you have to do is be qualified when that moment arrives. It’s something pretty simple, right? Can you do it?” 

“I will,” SungYeol answered quickly not liking the way the man’s eyes were looking at him.

“All this things are the consequences you have to pay for your actions,” JungYeop threw the fountain pen to his desk in an unceremoniously way. “You have to work twice as hard to clean your mistakes. You hear me?”

“Yes sir.”

“SungGyu. I’ll ask you to personally pay attention to everything, and I actually mean everything, he does from now on. Don’t let him do another mistake,” The CEO’s eyes were looking deeply into SungGyu’s ashamed ones. “The one you let happen was enough to smudge Infinite’s name.”

“I won’t, Hyung,” SungGyu tried to keep the eye contact but the rough words made it almost impossible.

“Now. This means SungYeol will come back to the dorms,” Again his causal voice broke in. This time both youngsters welcomed it. “You will get a different schedule from everyone else but there will be some moments when you’ll practice with them.”

“Thank you, Hyung,” SungGyu said followed by SungYeol.

“Don’t thank me, having you in your house makes me nervous. I don’t know exactly where are you and if you’re going to end up doing another scandal. And that is something I’m not willing to keep feeling.”

“I’m sorry for causing so much trouble,” SungYeol said and SungGyu had the feeling it wasn’t the first time he had said that to their CEO.

“You should be,” The man said but the kind smile on his face softened his words. “Now go get changed and start practicing with the other members. You both can leave.”

“Thank you, hyung.” SungGyu said as both bowed.

“Oh, right. SungGyu, I want you to inform me every time you can how things are going. Not only from this kid but also from everyone. I want no more mistakes.”

“There won’t be,” SungGyu answered getting a strange glance from the older man.

“And that includes you. What’s wrong with your voice? It hasn’t been even a month since I last heard you like this.”

SungGyu’s mouth opened for a moment before he closed it again. He could feel SungYeol’s clever eyes on him. He had noticed his raspy voice too. “Hum, I think caught a cold again. I took some medicine before but today it suddenly got like this. It didn’t happen before so I was thinking about going to get a shot or something stronger.”

“You should do that,” JungYeop nodded before opening his laptop. “I’ll tell Geonam to take you to the hospital in lunch time.”

“Thank you, Hyung.”

“Now leave. I’m busy.”

“Yes, Hyung.”

Said that both males left Woollim’s CEO with a strange sensation in the bottom of their stomachs and an awkward silence.