Goodnight Moon

Sehun took a sharp, lung-piercing breath in. He eyed Luhan, the so called deer boy, slowly made his way towards the gaping sleepy-eyed Sehun. Sehun noticed every inch of Luhan’s movement. Thinking how graceful Luhan was, how fluid the boy walked, how Luhan’s doe eyes sparkled under the moonlight and somehow lit up the jet black sky above them and still managed to still everything around them and steal all the air that Sehun needed.

Luhan broke into a small laugh. The laugh Sehun loved so much to hear and see. The laugh he swore he could listen to, all day long. The laugh that wiped all the tiredness and sadness away from Sehun’s entire being. Luhan sounded like an angel, as Sehun has said before. Not that he has heard an angel’s voice but it was the best thing to associate with Luhan’s voice. Because for Sehun, Luhan is an angel…his angel.

“Someone’s early today~” Luhan singsong as he skipped on the last few steps towards Sehun. The younger smiled brightly, turning his eyes into crescents.

“So, what are we up to today?” the deer boy beamed and tilted his head to the side.

“Stars and moon watching?” Sehun let out, almost in a whisper, suddenly unsure of his plan.

Luhan gasped and quickly covered his mouth and stared wide eyed at Sehun. “We would? Really?” his tone somewhat reminded Sehun of the kid he saw at the mall earlier today who was in disbelief when his mother bought him the biggest toy car at the toy store.

“Well, if you don’t want to then we ca-“ Sehun tried saying, oblivious of the other’s reaction, before being cut off by a worry-faced deer boy.

“No no no!! We go moon watching!!” Sehun fought off a laugh at the sudden shift of character from the older. Really, who would think he’s older when he practically acts like a 6 year old?

--

Sehun and Luhan were both sprawled on the rooftop floor of Sehun’s apartment, one of the highest buildings in the area. The sky felt closer and everything seemed to be somewhat magnified. Sehun mentally noted to thank Jongin again for discovering the apartment and telling him.

--

“Sehunnie, look at that one!” Luhan pointed somewhere to the left side. Sehun just smiled and nodded. For the next thirty minutes, Luhan kept on pointing out the constellations for his little Sehunnie.

Sehunnie, the name Luhan would always use to call him, always seemed to bring joy to the younger. For him, it was a special thing between the two them.

--

“Sehun, we should go back inside.” Luhan said as he tried to get up.

“No…” Sehun grabbed him and pulled him back down, “…it’s still early.”

“Well, the clock says otherwise.” Luhan said in a as-a-matter-of-fact tone.

“Then hell with it.” Sehun said through clenched teeth. Luhan raised an eyebrow, face etched with amusement.

“Really now?”

“Well…let’s just have a little more time for the two of us.” Sehun whispered but loud enough for Luhan to hear. The older just hummed, and relaxed back into his position. Both of them stared at the moon for a while.

--

“Hyung…”

“Yes, hunnie?”

“Can you…please sing a song?” Sehun turned his head to look at Luhan.

Without hesitation, Luhan opened his mouth and started to sing. Sehun couldn’t peel his eyes off of Luhan’s side profile; he traced Luhan’s features with his eyes. Sehun was sinking deeper into the hole and the angelic voice that resonated through Sehun’s ears didn’t help him at all.

All the lyrics, all the notes – Sehun took mental notes of them. It felt so perfect, so fitting to Luhan. Sehun hoped that somewhere in the extent of the song, he was there. That Luhan would find him there, that even just a part of it would represent Sehun. Andin every song that Luhan sang, Sehun found himself gripping to his faith. He was hoping to be somewhere in it and he has been hoping all these times for him to be the perfect song. The perfect song to match Luhan.

Sehun didn’t realize that Luhan has long finished singing and he was still deep in thought, still staring deep into Luhan, still too absorbed.

“Hunnie, is there anything wrong?” Luhan said softly, voice laced with worry. Sehun just shook his head lightly.

“You know you can always tell me anything, Hunnie. You can share your burdens with me.” Luhan continued, assuring the younger.

He wanted to but Sehun couldn’t. He can’t just say that he feared for Luhan’s departure. He couldn’t tell him he was frustrated for he cannot stop time…for he knew that when the sun shines and the day begins, Luhan has to go again. He couldn’t tell him how desperate he grips on every second with him. How he pled with every second to stop.

Luhan traced Sehun’s face with his fingertips. “No matter what you’re thinking, it’ll be okay Sehunnie.” Sehun smiled weakly.

“You should sleep.” Luhan stated. Before Sehun could even protest, Luhan pulled Sehun to his arms. Sehun just let himself settle and fit to the hollow spaces of Luhan’s body.

“Good night~” the older whispered as he planted a goodnight kiss onto Sehun’s forehead. Sehun’s eyes automatically closed. It was all he had thought about, all he had dreamt about and Sehun thought, by far, that he finally did reach out to him. How could he ever breathe without? Maybe he couldn’t without Luhan, he couldn’t breathe as free as he does at this moment.

Sehun then finally understood the hope they all talked about.

He finally felt the feeling people sang about.

--

“Do you feel us falling?” Luhan said. Sehun hummed, eyes still closed and scooted closer – if that was still even possible.

“’Cause I can feel us fallin’…” Luhan whispered, closed his eyes and held strongly onto the warmth of Sehun in his arms. Slowly, both of their lips curved up into a knowing smile.

And the moon shone bright, enveloping them to a sweet goodnight.