Haeri's pov

You know something is wrong when you see someone half beside you.

Especially when he has a face of an angel with raven black hair.

I blinked my eyes. The angel didn't go away. He had a concerned look on his face.

I smiled at his beautiful features. Until my gaze went sour. It was no angel, It was Kim Jaejoong in my room. A half Kim Jaejoong in my room.

I threw a pillow at him.

" Yah your really are a ing ert aren't you! Get out you ing pig! How did you even ge-"

I felt the fatigue overwhelmed me. I felt a bit faint. Jaejoong held me up. Why would the jerk do that? I heard him call me, It was faint. I felt tired and weary.

I woke up later to the pink four walls. No. Sight. Of. Kim. Jaejoong.

I slowly got up while remembering the night before. Some memories just wouldn't resurface. I made my way down stairs and my Mom stirring something up in the kitchen. Which had surprised me. My mom wasn't much of a cook. my dad was. I would always cook for my mom. Even if I wasn't feeling good I would. I didn't want my mom to worry. I didn't want my mom to think I was weak. Even though I am. I want her to happy after i leave this earth.

I took a deep breath to clear up my mind and choke back the tears. It was something I did almost everyday. Control your emotions I told myself. I don't want to worry mom.

Just before I was about to step into the kitchen I heard a crash. My eyes widened as i saw what may have been pancakes ... They were somehow both burnt and gooey at the same time and a pan on the ground.

"omma are you okay" I ran toward my mother while I checked on mer to see If she was aright.

"I'm okay" I looked down to her hand. Her finger was bleeding.

"omma your bleeding, How did it happen. Did you burn yourself too? I glanced down to the still sizzling pan on the ground.

"I was cutting fruit and i accidently cut myself. I was going to clean it with water but then I turn to quick causing the pan to knock over." She shyly laughed in embarrassment.

"what should I do with you" I sighed. I can't imagine what could happen to my mom when i am gone. I went to turn off the stove and quickly returned to my my moms side to tend to her wound. After washing, disinfecting and covering the cut with a domo-kun band aid. I spent the next half hour cleaning and remaking the pancakes by scratch.

As we sat down for the meal i couldn't help but have my thoughts clouded by Kim jaejoong. That jerk, he couldn't possibly have actually being here. He doesn't care for me, he never did.

"omma"

"ne?"

"Was Jaejoong here last night?"

"ne"

"why?"

"You don't remember?"

"ne" I nodded in confusion.

"He had found you the other day fainted on the street and quickly came here"

"does he know about me having canc-" My mom shot my a sad glance.

" Why can't you just tell everyone" why does she always ask me this.

" Omma I already told you. I want to live my life the fullest. I want people to treat me normally."

" We all know that is not the truth. You haven't been hanging out with Dara lately, nor Hyuna. There hasn't been any calls either. You have been ignoring them haven't you? Nor have you made any new friends. I hope you don't call living in isolation 'living life to the fullest'" She saw through it. She saw through my excuse the whole time.

"Mom, I hav-"

"Don't lie to me" Tears started going down her face. " I know you don't want people to worry. That is why you have pushed them all away, You did that with Jaejoong when your father died and your doing it again." I winced . that's not true. I didn't push jaejoong away. He pushed me away. He lied to me. He's and .

"hunny. You need to learn that the truth wont hurt the people that care for you and holding in your true feelings with hurt you more then you already are. I quickly ran upstairs leaving my untouched food beside my weeping mother. That is not true. I am not pushing people away. Nor am I hiding my feelings.

I locked my door, jumped on my bed and slid myself under the covers. I did not feel like going to school today.

313 days until

I was at school. Period 1 past, no sign of Jaejoong.

Period 2 past, no sign of Jaejoong.

Class was feeling more blunt then it usually was.

Period three no sign of Jaejoong.

I don't know what is possessing me to keep looking at the door. Somewhere in me i want to thank Jaejoong. I have no clue why.

Period four, no sign of Jaejoong.

End of the day no sign.

Park, no sign.

310 days until

I looked around the class sill no Jaejoong. Something didn't feel right. Where is jaejoong? The class was whispering about it too. Jaejoong was their idol and his four day absence had made them curious. Yes he had a reputation of being late, but not a reputation of being absent for such a long period of time. It wasn't like him.

The door open. Everyone glancing at who it could be. People squealed. One of the idols of the school.

Jung yunho.

"anyone seen Jaejoong?"

people whispered. If yunho didn't even know where Jaejoong was something must be very bad. They are inseparable. even since they were young.

A girl spoke up " oppa, aniyo. We haven't seen him in 4 days. He deeply sighed. He really didn't know where he was. He shot me a glance and slightly waved.

" I don't know where he is" I said bluntly.

He had a saddened expression upon his face.

------

3rd period had arrived.

It was half way through the class. The door slowly and quietly opened.

It revealed Kim Jaejoong.

The class went loud with girls asking questions, and guys just as eager to know also.

He walked toward the teachers desk. But something about his swagger, something about his presence wasn't the same.

He wasn't presenting his-self as he usual would. Some thing was really off.

He bowed at the teacher. That was when I looked into his eyes. The were cold. it had taken me back. There was no smile, that he always had plastered on his face. He was emotionless. The teacher was scolding him for his tardiness. He just stared at the ground.

" Kim Jaejoong care to explain, your small vacation" The teacher questioned.

"my father died" He said

and he wasn't lying.

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I really wanted to make this chapter funny before i had actually wrote it! but look how it turned out .... why am i such a sad depressed person! WAEYO! and jaejoong depressed! IMPOSSIBLE! he's so random!!!!!!! sorry if this story ...