Hyukjae POV

Did I disappoint you? Let you down? Should I feel guilty? Should I regret leaving you like this? Screaming and crying at me. Shouting that I’m an . See your broken heart in your eyes. See all your pain you had accumulate since our first kiss. Since you told me those hated words: I love you. Those words that create something new in my heart. I’ve never fall in love…but you’re the exception. I realise it too late. You’re gone. Since how many time? Did you suffer without me? Of course yes… It’s maybe over, but I won’t let you go away too far. I will find you and bring you back to me. I will take good care of you for now on.

Whenever I dream, it’s always about you. Always about what I should have done. What I’ve should have told you for make you stay. Now I know, I cannot live without you. I want you by my side. I NEED you. Your smile, your eyes, your lips, your heart, your soul, your…your everything.  I miss you far too much to forget you. I know, I broke you into pieces. Burn all your dreams. But love is selfish…so am I. They say love is blind…but not dumb. My heart is screaming your name all days and all nights. Screaming for you to return by his side. To have someone to tell him how much he’s loved…I’m addicted to you.

I’ve seen you cry, seen you smile. But, the thing you don’t know, it’s that my heart is in pain. Because you’re not here anymore. Because there’s no one whispering sweet words at my ear. Because Donghae…I broke you…I didn’t mean to…

Donghae I’m sorry…Donghae please come back. I need to hug you. To kiss you. To tell you how much I love you. How much I’m sorry for all I had done to you. My tears, they keep falling done from my cheek. In each one, there’s a sorry and a pray for you to return.

I would like to be one of your tears. To born in your eyes, live on your cheek and die when your smile rises again. Like this, I would know that I can go, without the fear of you being sad. With the satisfaction that there’s someone taking care of you and your smile. Someone making you happy every moment of your life.

Donghae, I swear. If there’s someone with you…by your side…I…I…I will let you go. For your happiness. Because love is all you deserve.

~

I’m walking in the street. The rain is falling. I like this feeling. It gives me the impression that all my mistakes are washed away from me. That when I will come back home, you will be there. Waiting for me. But it’s a lie. Lies…you probably think that everything I told you are lies. The thing, Hae, it’s that I didn’t know how to tell you my feeling. I was scared. Scared to be hurt by loving you too mush. So I’m walking in the rain, hoping to meet you. That’s insane; I don’t even know where you are. But I keep on walking. I promise to my heart that I will find you and bring you back and I have to keep this promise. I walk in a park now. There’s a couple in front of me. They are kissing. That’s reminding me you and me. Two guys…one his tall and the other his…you…

Donghae…why?