I have a crush. A big one.On a certain Jung Jessica. How this crush came to be, I'm not sure. All I know is that I'd date this girl in an instant. If only I could bring myself to talk to her, eh heh. Yes, that's the slight complication to my dream for the future; I haven't had a real solid conversation with her.

Now you may say, "Choi, you don't know her, this is clearly an infatuation." Perhaps this IS an infatuation. But one can hope that something comes out of it, can't they? And don't happy couples generally have some starting point somewhere. It's not an instant thing. One of them has to make a move. And that's pretty scary, I think.

How rude of me. I haven't properly introduced myself. My name is Choi Sooyoung. I am 19. I am a student at Seoul University. Admittedly, I am generally not a social person. My best friends, Yoona and Tiffany live in residence with me. We all went to the same high school and for some reason, these two decided to stick around me. Yoona cooks and Tiffany entertains me, so I can't really complain about having them around. Tiffany knows that I have a thing for Jessica. I never told her. But she says that she just knew and I didn't deny it. See, Jessica also went to the same high school and then we all got into the same university.

I should give you a bit of a background. I met Jessica in my second year of high school. Her locker was beside Tiffany's. I was waiting around at the end of school for Tiffany to show up, and then this girl comes up and starts fiddling around with the locker beside me. At first, I didn't really pay attention, but then I guess one of her books fell out of her hands while she was trying to get her locker open. Thinking it would be stupid to just stand there and not help, I bent down and picked it up. That was when I got a good look at this girl. My first thought was, she has a nice smile but once she shot an icy glare on you, you’ll freeze literally. Yes, lame. But that's the truth. I didn't say anything to her. I just handed the book to her, and she softly said, "Thank you". Then I felt an elbow nudging me in the side. It was Tiffany.

 

"Sooyoung, move it! You're in the way, I need my things." Tiffany looked over. "Oh, hey Jessica, what's up?"

 

Jessica, I thought. Hm. Pretty name, girl-with-an-icy-stare.

 

"Sooyoung, do you know Jessica?" said Tiffany. At the sound of my name, I was pulled out of my thoughts.

 

"Uhhh... no. Hi, I'm Choi Sooyoung". I said, scratching my head, and averting my eyes. I was never good at this introductions thing.

 

"It's nice to meet you, Sooyoung," she said with that beautiful smile. I noticed she had a distinct accent. From Jeju maybe?

 

It was then that some tall guy walking by stops and does a double-take. He approaches Jessica and they greet each other and talk about some class they apparently had together. Jessica then introduces him to us as Taecyeon. Tiffany says hi back, and I notice she's looking down... and blushing?

That was odd, I thought. Tiffany's never the shy type. I look at Taecyeon and his eyes are locked on Tiffany. Eventually Taecyeon and Jessica say bye and walk away together, leaving Tiffany and I. Tiffany swings around and says excitedly, "Oh my god. Jessica's boyfriend is so cute... But don't tell her I said that".

Boyfriend? And for a second, it seemed like I cared. "He's okay, I guess," I say. While we walk down the halls, I keep thinking about Jessica and her smile. And her supposedly-cute, not-bad-looking boyfriend. I guess with her looks she's got to have a boyfriend already. I catch myself. Why do I care? Then Yoona jumps onto me from out of nowhere.

 

"Crap, Yoona! Don't do that!"

 

"HahaSooyoung's so easily scared, Tiffany. So I saw you guys meet my brother!"

 

Tiffany and I are confused. Then Tiffany stops. "Wait a second! That Taecyeon is the same Taecyeon, your brother Taecyeon. THE Taecyeon that went to Jeju for a year?"

 

"Yup, yup. He's back now. He brought some cool things back too," Yoona says. She rambles on about the gifts he bought. Tiffany listens intently while I just keep to myself.

 

The days after that, when I waited for Tiffany at the end of classes, I always saw Jessica. She would say "Hi, Sooyoung" with that gorgeous smile of hers. And I would say hi back. It never really went beyond that and the occasional how are you, small talk, etc. Sometimes I would see her walk up to her locker with Taecyeon and they would be talking about their class or Jeju.

Those days, I was a little disappointed that she wouldn't say hi to me. Day after day, this went on. Eventually I noticed small details about Jessica. She’s not smiling always, but once she did, it’ll melt your heart right away. She wore skirts a lot. Not too short and just short enough. So, it's pretty impossible to not notice that she had nice legs too, and an overall nice figure. Uh... yeah. Well, you would probably notice that too! Geez. Obviously, with Jessica's good looks she had admirers. And I guess I was just like one of them: an insignificant fan. She became popular and took up being student council president.

And so high school went by fast. And we're here in university. Tiffany, Yoona, and I went into chemistry class today, the first of the year. We decided to have our schedules match up almost identically so that we could help (cheat off) each other. The class was huge. Maybe a thousand students. It was loud and we were all just getting settled into our seats. Then Tiffany smacks me in the head.

 

"Sooyoung! Look! Over there! It's Jessica and Taecyeon! Oh damn, he's looking at me. Pretend you're talking to me, Sooyoung. Now, Sooyoung.Talk."

 

I look at Tiffany's goofy smile, and her pleading eyes and try to come up with something random to talk about. Past Tiffany's shoulder, I see Yoona waving frantically at someone. , she's calling Jessica and Taecyeon.

 

And then... "Hi Sooyoung," I hear behind me in a Jeju accent. I freeze. Then I slowly turn around. Jessica's standing beside me and , she looks beautiful. I blush instantly and wave back a little awkwardly. She's wearing a light pink, short-sleeved top and white skirt. Her hair is tied up, for once, but she let some strands down next to her face. Of course, she's looking at me intently with a cute smirk.

 

"Hi Jessica!Ummm, hi Taecyeon. How are you?" Tiffany says.

 

Taecyeon says in his casual, charming voice, "I'm fine, thanks. It's nice to see you again, Tiffany. I didn't know you were taking chemistry too? Mind if we sit beside you? We'll just sit beside Sooyoung."

 

Tiffany smiles wide, but her eyes stare at me menacingly, probably for sitting beside her and effectively taking away her chance to sit beside Taecyeon. Jessica sits down beside me. My heart is racing at this point and my mind isn't thinking. She gets her pen and paper out, looks at me, and says, "I like your sweater, Sooyoung." I say "thanks".

 

Then my eyes scan her for something to compliment back. "I like your... er... um..." Uh oh, think something fast, Sooyoung.

 

I look at her top and notice it's ed at the top. Wait, is that her... "bra?" I say.

 

Jessica stares at me for a second and then looks down at her top. . What did I just say? Stupid.Stupid."Uh. Wait. What I meant was... was..."

 

She lightly laughs at me and cuts off my sentence. "Um, thank you, Sooyoung". I instantly look down at the ground, blushing like mad.

 

 

"Well Sooyoung, you certainly have a way with the ladies," Taecyeon adds in, grinning. Great, I thought.

 

The lecturer starts. I listen. At least there's one thing that I can use to escape – academics. Despite my apparent lack of conversational skills, I'm actually pretty smart. I'm top 10 in my science courses, not so much in my writing courses. I look to my right. Tiffany's starting to doze off already and Yoona's concentrated on spinning her pen around her fingers. I glance to my left and Jessica's listening intently, taking notes along the way. Taecyeon is sitting back, not even writing anything. He's probably one of those students that absorb information like a sponge.

I try to relax a little and bring my arm up onto the armrest, unintentionally touching Jessica's arm. I quickly pull it off and muster a quick "Sorry!" Maybe that was too loud; people in the row in front of us turn around. Tiffany wakes up and Yoona stares at me, dropping the pen she was spinning. "Uh... sorry," I say, a little quieter. Jessica says it's okay and continues writing with a small smile on her face. And there I go, blushing again. I manage to just shut up until the class ended and we got out of the room.

 

Taecyeon begins speaking. "Everyone, Jessica and I would love for you all to come over for dinner at our house. It's just a block away from the university. It'd be great to have you all visit."

 

Tiffany stutters, "well, hm. w-we have things to do, right Sooyoung? We have that.." She only gets nervous like this around Taecyeon, I've noticed.

 

Yoona jumps in. "Ya! I miss my oppa’s cooking! Let's go Tiffany! Sooyoung!"

 

"I guess we could go," I say, and Tiffany reluctantly agrees. And I notice Jessica's staring at me. I feel a little uncomfortable under her gaze.

 

"That's great. We'll see you at 6 at the east campus gates. We could all walk together," Jessica says, keeping her eyes on me for some reason. I catch myself staring back.

 

"Mmmmkay! Let's go to stats class, Sooyoung!" Tiffany says as she tugs me away. We hurriedly say goodbye and start walking. I take a second to look back at Jessica, and she's looking at me, but then starts talking to Taecyeon.

 

 

--------------

 

 

So at 5:45, the three of us: me, Tiffany, and Yoona are already waiting around the university gates for Jessica and Taecyeon. Despite Tiffany's initial shyness about having dinner at their house, she forced us to rush back to residence, get ready fast, and be early. Tiffany even fussed us about what we were wearing.

 

"Sooyoung, you have to look presentable. I don't want Taecyeon and Jessica thinking that I live with bums. But keep that sweater on. Jessica said it was nice."

 

Remembering this, I couldn't help but smile a little. Wait. What am I thinking? Jessica's with Taecyeon.Jessica's with Taecyeon.Jessica's with Taecyeon. No way is she going to like me just from a stupid sweater. I looked down and just stared at the concrete.

 

"Hey, they're here!" Yoona points out. I look up at the couple approaching.

 

Yoona runs up and hugs her brother.

 

While we walked, there was not enough room for all 5 to walk together. So Tiffany, Yoona, and Taecyeon walked together in front, and Jessica and I were left walking behind. At first, we didn't say anything. But I knew I needed to break the awkward silence. I scrambled for a conversation topic. Yes, I have to show Jessica that I can hold her attention for more than 2 seconds.

 

"So... how were your classes today?" I quickly said.

 

She looks at me. "I'm sorry?" I guess she was thinking of something else.

 

"Umm... nevermind." I gave up fast. Ahhh epic fail.

 

She smiles at me and then asks me how I've been. I tell her fine. And ask back. She says she's well. Small talk. Will I ever get past that with Jessica? There's a short silence. Then, suddenly, she asks, "How is living with Tiffany? You both seem really close."

 

I tell her that it's great. Tiffany is so hyper and Yoona is a good cook also.

 

"Oh." She says and then looks away. "That's good, then." Was she bored with talking with me? She wasn't smiling anymore.

 

I felt it was kind of obligatory for me to ask her how living with Taecyeon was. But I didn't really want to hear about how great of a boyfriend he was and all of that. But I ask anyway and she answers.

 

"It's nice. Taecyeon is a great cook as well. It gets lonely sometimes, with just the two of us in such a big house. You should visit when you're free. And Tiffany and Yoona too."

 

"Oh. Um. I have a lot of classes. But I guess I could. Sometimes." I scratch the back of my head. Jessica nods.

 

Tiffany calls over her shoulder "Oy! Jessica are you teasing poor Sooyoung? She looks embarrassed. Please forgive her if she's being too quiet."

 

Jessica looks up, "No, Sooyoung is actually very adorable."

 

Did Jessica just say that? Wow. I can feel my face heating up. Tiffany looks at me and winks. I think Jessica might have noticed this because she laughs a little.

 

"Ok, here we are," Taecyeon announces. We get inside and it is freakishly, beyond clean. I feel bad for even stepping into the house and bringing my dirty shoes in contact with the pristine front rug.

 

"I'll start cooking up something. Jessica, could you set up the table?" Taecyeon says.

 

"Don't worry about it Jessica. I can take care of that" Tiffany says. She must have realized that she had no clue where everything was because only a moment later, we hear, "T-Taecyeon, where are the chopsticks?"

 

Yoona, meanwhile, had plopped onto the couch in the living room and was watching TV.

 

"Sooyoung, why don't I show you the house?", she said and turns to me.

 

Frankly, I could care less how the house looks. But since Jessica was asking, I can't really say no. I nod. Jessica brings me around through the dining room, living room, etc., pointing out various things, especially the artwork. Taecyeon and her must have some high taste; all the art looked authentic abstract expressionism. Eventually she brings me upstairs, shows me the lounge rooms and then to her bedroom. My god, it was huge. And very modern too.

 

"Sorry for the mess," she says while blushing a little, I noticed, even though it was perfectly clean.

 

I follow her in and walk towards some picture frames. They're of her and Taecyeon with what looks like her family. They all seem happy. I'm a little jealous, but glad she's happy with someone. I then walk up to a table with various tea cups and pots on it. I ask her why she has so many.

 

"Tea ceremony is a hobby of mine. I try to collect nice pieces, when I see them," she says fondly while sitting down onto her bed. I decide to sit down beside her.

 

"Oh. They're pretty."

 

Then I look at her and notice that she's looking at me with a grin, so I cough to break the nervous feeling I was getting.

 

"Um... yeah, nice room," I announce, trying to keep it normal. Hold on, is Jessica getting closer? Like really close?

 

"Sooyoung, I..."

 

"DINNER! SOOYOUNG! JESSICA!" We hear Taecyeon calling us and it startles the both of us. Jessica stands up really quick.

 

"Holy freak."I mumbled. I manage to fall off the bed and gather myself up.

 

"GeezSooyoung, you seem really stiff" Tiffany says when we get downstairs. Way to draw the attention to me, Tiffany.

 

"Like when something scares her," Yoona decides to add.

 

"Ha, maybe she saw how messy Jessica's room was," Taecyeon chuckles. Jessica glares at him and gives him her famous icy glare.

 

It turns out Taecyeon may be as good of a cook as her sister Yoona. And the gravy was amazing! So amazing that Yoona decided to try balancing a large spoonful of it and spin it like she does with her pencils. Of course it fails and splatters onto the table.

 

"Yoona! You got it on my hand" Tiffany says, staring at the sauce covering her palm.

 

"Allow me," Taecyeon says, and starts gently wiping it away with a napkin.

 

"T-T-Thank you, Taecyeon," is all Tiffany can coherently say.

 

I look over at Jessica sitting beside me and notice a small bit of gravy on her neck. She mustn't have noticed. Err..what to do now? Tell her? I look over at Taecyeon being all gentlemanly with his napkin. I look at mine. Damn, here goes. I grab my napkin and carefully bring it up towards Jessica's neck and wipe it off. Meanwhile, I am probably as red as the lobster sitting on the table. Jessica is surprised at first, then her expression softens and she mouths a thanks. I go back to eating. I couldn't help but sneak looks at Jessica from the corner of my eye. Why did she have to be so perfect? She's smart, conversational, and beautiful in every way. Even the way she eats is lady-like. I sigh and look from her to Taecyeon. They're the perfect, happy couple.

 

"There's this night festival going on just downtown later this month. We should all go together," Taecyeon says. "It's a chance for you ladies to wear those nice hanboks."

 

"Yes! I've heard of that. It should be fun, although, Sooyoung doesn't really like wearing hanboks," Tiffany states. It was true. I didn't like them. They're too uncomfortable when a good pair of jeans and t-shirt could do.

 

"Well that's too bad. They're rather nostalgic. Jessica, here, has quite a collection of hanboks," Taecyeon says.

 

My mind drifted. Jessica in... hanboks.. oh gosh. Geisha Jessica. Ah, wipe away bad thoughts. Poke food. Concentrate on food. Gravy.On Jessica's neck.Ahhh.Umm something else to think of. . Bacteria.Gram-positive bacteria.Agar plates. Peptidoglycan layer... cells. Think cells.

 

"Is something wrong, Sooyoung? You seem deep in thought," Jessica asks me.

 

"Uhhhh nope.Nothing wrong.Just thinking of microbiology.Yah.Gotta love them E. coli bacteria". Ah, mental forehead-slap.

 

Everyone laughs. She giggles. "Sooyoung's very studious, I see."

 

 

-------------

 

 

After that, the five of us hung out pretty often around campus. We had quite a few classes together. It was piss raining outside one day and freezing cold. I had a ton of books with me in my backpack. I got to the library at our usual table. Tiffany and Taecyeon were there, hovering over their chemistry books. Taecyeon was animatedly explaining a reaction mechanism to Tiffany. Tiffany was smart, so she probably didn't need the help, but she liked hearing Taecyeon explain things. When they noticed me, Taecyeon checked the time.

 

"Oh! I was supposed to get Jessica an umbrella before it started raining today. She probably just got out of her tea ceremony class and is waiting for me," he says.

 

I look back outside. , it's raining hard. How could he forget about Jessica? I was mad at him on the inside, even though I know that it's normal for these things to slip your mind.

 

He continued, "But if I go back, I'll be late for my club meeting soon."

 

I look down at myself. I was already soaked and had an umbrella in my hand. "I can go. Where is she?"

 

"Ah, thank you, Sooyoung. I owe you one. She will be just at the main engineering building. Thanks, again, Sooyoung."

 

Main engineering building... that's across campus! Greeeat.

 

I drop my bag of books in front of Tiffany and tell her to watch them for me. She tells me good luck with a wink. Then I get outside and start running. The less time I was in this weather, the better. In about 10 minutes of constant running, I managed to get my entire body, head to toe, soaked in rain. My socks felt like boiled cabbage... without the heat, of course. I got to the building and noticed Jessica standing, waiting inside. I got in and caught my breath, before managing a "Hey... I have an umbrella." And then give her a quick smile.

 

"Sooyoung! Did you run here? Your clothes are all wet. You should've just stayed with Tiffany and Taecyeon! I would have been okay," she said to me in a slightly scolding tone.

 

I guess she noticed that I was a little disappointed at her reaction, so she looked up to my eyes, and softly whispered

"…but thank you".

 

I could've died happy then, with the way she was looking at me. But then I noticed that she didn't have a jacket. She was just wearing a blouse and a skirt, as usual.

 

"You're going to get cold out there," I said.

 

"We can just go to my house then. It's closer than going to the library to meet up with Tiffany and Taecyeon," she says. I figure Tiffany can take care of my books. She'll forgive me.

 

We get to the house, and the lights are all off. The power must have gone out. Jessica brings me upstairs and she tells me to get out of my clothes. Did she just say that? I stare at her for a second.

 

She laughs when she realizes why I'm looking at her strangely.

 

 "Sooyoung, you need to wear dry clothes. Otherwise you'll get sick." Oh. Right. Sometimes my brain fails me.

 

She searches through her closet and finds me some flannel pyjamas and a white bathrobe. Sheepishly, I take them and change in the washroom. When I get out, I notice that Jessica has changed to a robe-like sleeping outfit. She sneezes and I realize that the short walk to her house in the cold must have gotten her sick.

 

Then her phones rings. She looks at it. It's a text.

 

"Taecyeon and Tiffany are going to your house and Taecyeon will probably sleep over there because the storm isn't stopping soon. Sooyoung, I think you should sleep over here then." She said.

 

"If you don't mind, I guess so," I say.

 

Damn, alone with Jessica. I better not make a fool of myself. I look at the time. It was almost 8. Maybe she didn't have dinner. Jessica sneezes again. I tell her that I'll cook up some soup for her. At least, I could do that. After dinner, Jessica asks me what I wanted to do. I didn't really know, so I look around. Is that... no, it can't be. Playstation! I think she saw that I was staring at it, and told me that I could play it, if I felt like it.

 

And so for the next hour or so, I was caught up in videogames. Ah, this is the life. I look over at Jessica who looks pretty bored.

 

"Uh, Jessica. Do you want to play against me?"

 

"You seemed like a pro in video games. I don't think I could compare."

 

I hand her the second controller anyway.

 

Let's just say I was beyond shocked. Two minutes in and it was "K.O.! Winner!" Jessica had beaten me with the lousiest character in the game. How did that happen? I stare at Jessica, who yawns gracefully, and states, "I guess I am a natural. But Sooyoung was good competition." And she smiles with her head tilted to the side.

 

Later that night, I realized Jessica was getting tired. So we decided to get ready to sleep. Jessica told me that I could use her bed and that she would just sleep in the lounge room on the sofa. I protested, of course, and offered to switch. She insisted. And there was no way I could change her mind.

 

So I'm lying in Jessica's massive bed. And I can't sleep, even a wink. My thoughts are going crazy. Jessica... Ah, stop. I need to just sleep right now. I roll onto my side. Sleep, Sooyoung. Count sheep. Or puppies. My brain's too active for sleep. Maybe I just need a glass of milk. Yeah, that's what Yoona does to cool down her hyperactivity at the end of the day.

I sneak out of Jessica's room as quietly as I could and head downstairs to pour myself a glass. I'm sure Jessica and Taecyeon won't mind a little bit of missing milk. When I'm done, I tip toe back upstairs. Jessica's sleeping in the lounge room. Maybe I could just check on her. I peak into the room through the slightly ajar door. Her back is turned towards me. I sneak in and look at her. She's beautiful when she sleeps, I notice. Her hair is perfectly spread onto the pillow and her face looks so soft. But then I notice that she's shivering. It was pretty cold in her house. Add that to her being sick.

I'm an idiot. I should've made her sleep in her own room. At least it had warm blankets. Now what? I can't just leave her like this. So I bend down and scoop her up gently into my arms. Gee, she's pretty light. How awkward would it be if she woke up just now. She would think I was kidnapping her or something, eh heh. I carry her out of the lounge room and head towards her room. My shin scrapes on the corner of her bed frame. . . It hurts. Son of a... a string of swear words run through my mind as I place Jessica down. I tuck her in and am about to go back to the lounge room to sleep. But a hand stops me. Jessica was holding onto my hand. Wait, she's awake now? I turn back to her and through the darkness I can see her sitting up and looking back at me.

 

"Sooyoung. Stay. Please, sleep here," she pleads.

 

Ummm. Yeah. So I slide myself under the sheets back onto the bed. To say I was uncomfortable for the next couple of hours is an understatement. I couldn't sleep. I just lay there, my mind frozen. I could hear Jessica sleeping contently. At least she wasn't shivering anymore. Man, this is going to be a long night.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

---------

it's SOOYOUNG's POV!!! so what can you say? typical story i guess... but nonetheless, hope you like it :)

CREDITS TO SOOSICSM_09

love you all!