Chapter 18 

The program was going smoothly and everyone was enjoying it. You could hear the audience going crazy even from the backstage. I wanted to talk to Sho; but it seemed like I was not going to be able to talk to him after all. He was always busy. Who was I kidding? My heart ached for him for every second that I was apart from him. Why did this happen to me? A quiet girl who liked to live her life at her own pace; how did my life ended up this complicated? 

I was deep in my thoughts that I did not even realize that the show was already over. The backstage started to fill with more people; I mean more Johnnys. Wait, Sho must be around here somewhere. Maybe I could talk to him now... I started to wonder around looking for him when I saw him leaving. He was already changed into his regular clothing and was exiting the room with his bag swinging over his shoulder. It was now or never, so I after him. 

I remembered my talk with my cousin, before I came back to Tokyo. “You should stop worrying about others and what people might think, and do what you want for once. Think about where you want to live, and who you want to live with. You can’t run away forever for the sake of others” she had told me... 

“Chotto matte! Sho-“I yelled after him. Good thing there were not too many people around. He turned around; I rushed towards him. 

“Anou... Domo...” I said, but he did not say anything back. “Um... Can we talk for a bit?” 

“Wouldn’t your new boyfriend get jealous if we talked Buse?” 

“No...” Wait what boyfriend? “Wait, what? I don’t have a boyfriend.” Who was he talking about? Does he think that I would find myself someone else this fast? “Do you thing I could get over you this fast?” I blurted out. Who was he talking about? 

He looked confused for a second. “Then why were you hugging Maruyama?”He asked. 

Ehh? He saw that? “I was crying, and then he came and I think he felt bad for me so he gave me a hug.” Word vomit! Why did I say that I was crying? 

“Oh...” he said, looking more confused than ever. “ Why were you crying?” 
Because I couldn’t stand seeing you again; because I still love you. “Um...it’s nothing...” I looked away, trying to not look into his eyes. 
“Well,it’s OK if you don’t want to tell me for now... I actually wanted to talk to you.” He said. “Back when you... left... you did not give me a chance to explain. My career is important, yes. But you are important, too. And I know I can make these both work at the same time.” 

“Sho. I am sorry for leaving you. I rushed things without thinking them throughly. I have always thought about what’s best for others but I never actually thought about what I want for myself. I still lo-“ 

He suddenly grabbed my shoulder and pulled me into a kiss. I started to cry, we were kissing but I was crying at the same time. 

“Shh... it’s okay, don’t cry anymore,” he said as he moved his lips to my cheek, kissing the fallen teardrops. 

“I- I just...” I didn’t know why I was crying. Everything was just happening to fast, too unreal. 

“You don’t need to say anything,” Sho said, “Are you hungry Buse-chan” he asked. 

“Not really...” Then my tummy grumbled, rather loudly. 
He laughed at me. “Let’s go eat somewhere,” he said while I blushed red. 

“I have food at home; let’s go. I especially cooked this morning since it’s the new years.” 

“Really, I missed your cooking. But wouldn’t we bother your parents?” 

“No. They are in Osaka with my grandparents.” 

“Okay then let’s go.” He said, grabbed my hand and walked me towards his car. 
We arrived at my parents’ house and I told him to watch TV while I heated the meals. 

“I’ll help you.” He said. 

“You just sit there” I said pointing at the sofa. “You must be tired after the performance. I will cook.” 

“You would make an awesome wife,” he said smiling. 

“Umm... not really. I just like cooking that’s all. For example, I hate cleaning,” I said. 

“I was just saying,” he said and the TV. 
I rolled my eyes and started heating the food i had prepared in the morning. 

“The food is ready” I told him, motioning him to come to the dinner table. 

“Ohh, you prepared a feast...” he said grinning from ear to ear. 

“You are welcome,” I said, “itadakimass” I said and started to eat. Since both of us were tired, and hungry we didn’t talk much during the dinner, after I cleaned up the table, I saw him walking towards the backyard. 

“Where are you going?” 

“It’s snowing outside, come” he said and pulled me towards outside. 
There was a thin layer of snow on the grass making the place look more peaceful than ever. İ ran outside holding my palms towards the sky trying to feel the snow as I laughed. 

“Do you like the snow?” he said as he hugged me from behind. 

“Of course I do, look isn’t it pretty?” I said pointing towards the sky. 

“You are prettier.” He said and I laughed more. 

“Sakurai Sho that was the corniest thing you have ever said.” 

“But it’s the truth.” He said innocently, smiling. I just smiled back at him. 

“Would you like to dance with me?” he said suddenly. 

“Eh, there is no music Sho-kun.” I said. 

“Well” then he started humming to a slow song and placed my arms around his neck, then put his arms around my waist. 

“Now we have music,” he said and continued to hum. 
This was our first dance. It was a bit awkward in a way, but sweet at the same time. I was truly happy that I could start the new years with him like this. 

“I think we should go inside, your nose is all red.” Sho said pinching my nose. 

“Ouch. Your nose is redder than mine mister.” I said laughing. “Aren’t you gonna go home?” I asked. 

“No. I am afraid you will run away again.” 

“I am not going anywhere, Sho-kun. I’ve learned my lesson.” I said. 

“It’s really late, I am tired and I can’t drive like this. What If I get into an accident and die?” 

“God forbid, stop making up weird scenarios in your head. “ I said. “Okay, you can stay over but I need to find you a futon or something.” 

“Can’t I stay in your room?” 

“Ehh, no you can’t.” 
He laughed. “Just kidding, I will help you look for one then” he said and started following me around. 

I opened the door to my room, and then realized he was right behind me. I couldn’t let him see my room. It would be too embarrassing so I slammed to door. 

“Is that your room?” he asked. 

“Yes, but I don’t think my mom keeps futons in my bedroom so no need to go in. I said and walked towards another room. Then I realized he was not following me. 

“No!” I said but I was too late. He had entered my room. I could die from embarrassment. This was my teenage room so my walls were filled with Arashi posters and sticker and so on… Oh the irony… 
Then I heard his sweet laugh. Oh God, take me now I thought. 

‘’Buse-chan I didn’t know you loved me this much.” He said. 

“I told you not to enter my room.” I said trying to look indifferent. 

“I am sorry, but this is amazing. Really,” he said. 

“No, it’s embarrassing,” I whispered. 

“it’s cute” he said and gave me a little hug. “You go look for futon, I shall be inspecting you room.” He said. 

“But-“ 

“I am tired,” he said and yawned. Ugh whatever. 

“I will be right back.” 

I searched for futons inside the house but couldn’t find them. Where the hell did my okaasan put them? Ugh. I guess he will have to sleep on the couch, I thought and walked back to my room. To my surprise I found him asleep- On my bed. 

“sho-kun?” I said, no movement. “Oi! Sho-kun wake up,” I said but stopped when I saw his peaceful sleeping face. He really must have been tired. He fell asleep on top of the covers, too. I took out the extra blanket in my room to cover him with it; right then he grabbed my hand. However he was still asleep. I tried to loosen his grip but I couldn’t. 

My bed was big enough for both of us I guess. I was really tired as well. I lied down next to him, and fell asleep… 

“Ummhhhh….ughhh….” I mumbled as the sun rays hit my eyes. I did not want to wake up. Then, I felt something soft and warm next to me. I slowly opened my eyes and found Sho sleeping next to me. Then I realized that somehow we had ended up cuddling. He was so warm; I didn’t want to wake up after all. I closed my eyes and hugged him a bit tighter, burying my face on his chest. 

Then, I realized that he was warmer than usual; warmer than he was supposed to be. I touched his forehead; he had fever for sure. 

“Sho…” I said, “ you need to wake up.” I said, again. 

“I don’t want to,” he said. 

“I think you have a fever, you need to wake up so that I can measure your temperature.” I told him. 

“I am okay,” he said trying to get up, but lied down right back. “Ugh, my head hurts.” 

“Wait, let me get the temperature from the bathroom” I said. 

While he got his temperature measured I brushed my teeth quickly and changed into something more comfy since I had fallen asleep in my clothes from yesterday. 

“Go take a cold shower.”I told him. 

“Eh,?” 

“it reduces your fever. Not a frozen cold one of course… While you do that I will cook you chicken soup.” 

“Okay.’ 

“ I placed the towel and some pj’s there. Don’t worry, my mom likes to keep extra clothing in case we have guests over like you” I said. 
My parents were supposed to come back today so I called my mom and found out that, thanks to the snows the roads are blocked, so they can’t drive back to Tokyo today. B.A.D was supposed to have a few schedules here in Tokyo before going back to Osaka but I couldn’t leave Sho by himself. I called my boss and told them that I couldn’t come today because I was sick. They thankfully believed my white lie and let me off for today. 

When I took the chicken soup to Sho I saw him talking on the phone. 

“I am really sick so can’t you guys film without me for today?” Sho asked. 

“Bakaero, flu must have made your brain stop. What’s the date today? January 1st so we don’t have any schedules today!” Nino shouted from the other line. 

“Oh, I totally forgot, but why are you shouting?” 

“because I just went to sleep! After the new year’s party which ended around 5 am—Wait, where the hell were you yesterday?” Nino shouted again, but then he started talking normally so I couldn’t figure out what he was saying. 

“Here is your soup Sho-kun,” I said entering the room. 

‘Arigatou, Buse-chan” he said. 

“EHH?! Buse-chan! YOU were with her, AGAIN?!” Nino shouted from the other line. 

“yes, I’ll talk to you later Nino-kun. Jane~” Sho said and hung up on him. 

“that’s not nice, hanging up on your bandmates” 

“Well, he just wouldn’t stop screaming and I already have a bloody headache.” He said. 

“after you eat this, I will give you your medicine. Now say ‘aaa’” I said trying to feed him. 

“I can eat it myself Buse” he said. 

“No, I will feed you, now be a good boy and open your mouth.” He did as I told him to and started eating the soup. 

“This is really tasty, Thank you~” he said and kissed me. 

“Eww, I can taste the soup, too- thanks to you. Are you trying to make me sick, too?” I asked him, 

“You won’t get sick with just one kiss… but if I kiss you again and again” he said and started showering me with small kisses. My forehead, my hair, my cheeks,( I probably smelled like chicken soup now. ) and finally my lips. I should stop kissing him, or I was going to get the flu, too… 
“If I get sick-“ he just wouldn’t let me talk. He grabbed my waist and pulled me down on my bed, kissing me more. I needed to breathe. “If I get sick who is going to take care of you?” I managed to ask him though the kisses. 

“You won’t get the flu,” he said, and continued to kiss me, from my lips he moved down to my neck again. I wanted to stop him, my reasonable side wanted to stop this; but I had missed him so much that I didn’t want to stop kissing him. 

DING DONG!!~ DINGDONG!!~ 

I immediately pushed him off of me and fixed my hair. “Someone is here, I better answer the door,” 

“You don’t have to,” he offered. 

“I do; and you need to rest mister.” I said, and looked out the window to see who had come. 

“I really do need to answer the door now.” I said and walked downstairs. Sho decided to follow me, seeing who the guests were. 

“Welcome,” I smiled, opening the door; however- I faced a pissed off Ninomiya Kazunari who looked like he could punch someone any moment. 

“May I come in?” he asked. 

“S-sure,” I said. 

He walked past me inside, walking towards a scared Sho. “You Sakurai Sho have some explaining to do-“ Nino said, pointing at him furiously. 

Oh damn, I said to myself... 

-----

Chapter 18 is UP YAY. I updated it with 2 chapters today :D