Chapter Six

I stood in front of WooRam oppa’s university in my chiffon, knee-length, sleeveless, minty green sundress. Good thing I had a shopping release yesterday night, I had something new to wear for today. I smile to myself as I fix the collar of my dress, priming myself once more to make sure I looked my best. My canary yellow purse sat nicely across my body as I adjusted the chain. My right hand links with the chain of my purse as my left hand held tightly to the lunchbox I had prepared this morning for WooRam oppa and myself to enjoy. I took a deep breath and made my way towards the library.

I had no idea where the library was but it didn’t take me long to find someone to help me. I stood in front of the library as I gazed up at the grand steps leading up to the building. My kitten heels clicked along the steps as I made my way up towards the entrance. I stood in front of the entrance uncertain if I should go in or not, I actually didn’t know if I was even allowed in being that I wasn’t a student there.

I took a quick glance at my watch; 12:15. I took another anxious breath. I smile sheepishly as I gaze down at the lunchbox in my hand. I felt my purse vibrating and quickly took out my phone; it was WooRam oppa.

“Hello?” I answer.

“Hey Nicole, are you here yet?”

“I am. I’m standing in front of the library.”

“Ok, I’ll be right over.”

I nodded, as if he could see me, but the smile on my face got wider. I was getting quite anxious and excited. I place my phone back in my purse as I continue my wait. The wind was blowing and caused my dress to flow with its direction. Seriously, if I could see myself in that moment, I swear I must have looked like the most innocent and angelic girl standing there with her hair and dress flowing in the wind.

I close my eyes to imagine the scene playing out and I couldn’t help but giggle at the image. I look so beautiful!

My giddiness must have gotten a bit out of control. The moment I opened my eyes WooRam oppa was standing in front of me with a puzzled expression on his face, along with a few other students passing by.

I quickly got composure and stood up properly. I suddenly felt my cheeks blushing. How embarrassing!

“Oppa...” I sheepishly greet him, trying my best to hide my embarrassment.

I could hear his chuckling at my embarrassment.

“Did you wait long?”

Still feeling embarrassed I dared not to make eye contact with him, I just shook my head.

He continues his chuckling, “come, let’s find a place to eat.”

I suddenly felt a surge of excitement run through my body as I felt his hand take hold of mine. My face suddenly felt like it was about to burn, but not from embarrassment, just from excitement.

“We just need to find a place to sit.” I finally manage to speak.

He stops and turns to me with a smile, “what do you mean?”

I sheepishly hold up the lunchbox I had prepared, “I made us lunch.”

“Really?” He sounded quite excited.

I smile at his reaction, “you said that you wanted to taste my cooking. I took this chance to finally give you a taste.”

“Wah, I should have asked to hang out with you sooner.” He comments with a chuckle.

I could tell he was teasing me but I would be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy it.

We decided to enjoy the afternoon weather so we found a nice shaded area under a big tree on the campus grounds. We took a seat beside each other as I begin to set out the food for the both of us.

I was really enjoying his company. It just felt like old times again. We chatted about everything and anything we could think of. We were catching up on our lives and what has been happening. I actually vented to him about my whole situation with HoWon as well. There were a lot of laughs.

The ringing of his phone stalled our conversation a bit but I didn’t mind. But I couldn’t help but feel a bit uneasy at how he answered his phone. The smile on his face was wider than I have ever seen it before, and his voice was quite excited and bubbly, just overall different than how he usually is. But then again it wasn’t any of my business, I was just happy to be enjoying my time with him.

“You don’t mind if a friend of mine joins us do you?” He turns to ask me the moment he ended his call.

I smile at him and shook my head, “of course not. There’s still a lot of food left.”

“Thanks Nicole, she should be coming over soon.”

She? It was a girl? I suddenly felt uneasy.

“BoRa, over here,” I hear him calling her over as he stood up with a wide smile on his face.

I slowly stood up as I watch a beautiful girl running up to us.

“Hey, sorry I’m late.” She greets us as she bows to us.

I didn’t know what to say so I bowed back. I glance over at WooRam oppa and he still had that excited smile on his face.

“Nicole, I want you to introduce to my beautiful girlfriend Yoon BoRa.”

Girlfriend?

“Girl...friend?” I found myself stuttering out.

He smiles back at me, “isn’t she beautiful?” He adds a wink.

“Yah,” I she her nudging him playfully, “please ignore him,” she turns to me. “It’s nice meeting you Nicole. Oppa has told me a lot about you.” She holds her hand out for a shake with a smile.

I didn’t know what to do. I had to get a hold of myself. Before it became awkward and suspicious I quickly took hold of her hand for the shake and force a smile on my face.

“It’s nice meeting you too.” I was trying my hardest to not stutter.

“Come, sit, Nicole made lunch. You should try it, it’s delicious.” WooRam oppa offers to BoRa.

I watch as the two of them got comfortable with each other. They were giggling, joking around, playfully flirting with each other as if I wasn’t even there. I suddenly felt a pang against my chest. I didn’t know what it was but I was intuitive enough to pick up on what it could be.

I took a deep breath before forcing a smile on my face. I couldn’t show them how I truly feel. It wasn’t really my place to do so. I had no reason or purpose to do so either. I was smarter than that than to embarrass myself further.

“So how did you guys meet?” I manage to choke out.

“Do you want to tell the story or should I?” WooRam oppa spoke, his voice was softer than usual and I couldn’t help but feel a bit disappointed in the change of his tone.

“Go ahead I know how you enjoy telling the story.” BoRa unnie replies with a smile on her face.

I suddenly felt like I shouldn’t have asked anything. I don’t know if I was ready to hear anything regarding their relationship. I just felt so defeated. But since I already did ask I decided to just brave it out and be as composed as I can.

As I sat there listening to their love story I couldn’t help but feel uncomfortable, even though I tried my hardest to smile and nod along to the story. The pang in my chest just got worse and worse. Their story was turning out to be more and more like one of those clichéd drama storylines. Something that I had always secretly wanted for myself but I just felt absolutely frustrated listening to it from them. At that moment I knew that my jealousy has gotten the best of me. I couldn’t handle it anymore, no matter how hard I tried to be pleasant.

“That was sweet.” I find myself interrupting WooRam oppa in the middle of his sentence. I force a smile as I look at him and BoRa unnie.

“Are you ok Nicole?” WooRam oppa asks with concern.

I would have melted from his concern if we weren’t in the situation that we were in now. I took a deep breath and with the forced smile on my face I nodded.

“I’m fine. Your story just reminded me so much of those love dramas; very cute and romantic.”

WooRam oppa and BoRa unnie turn to gaze at each other with a smile on their faces. “Isn’t it?” WooRam oppa utters sweetly.

That’s it, I couldn’t handle it anymore. I clear my throat and let out a long sigh. I stood up from my seat and begin to straighten out my dress. I slung my purse over my body. I turn to them with another force smile.

“I think I should get going. Enjoy the rest of the lunch ok?” I smile at them, I turn to BoRa unnie. “It was really nice meeting you unnie.” I bow to them before slowly stepping away.

“Why are you leaving so soon? Are you sure you’re ok Nicole?” WooRam oppa stood up from his seat.

I gaze at him and his concern expression for me. I wanted to yell out to him so many things at that moment. In my head: I’m not ok! I’m about to go crazy here! I can’t believe you had a girlfriend all this time! And I was planning my future with you! I made you my husband! You broke my heart oppa!

I took a deep composed breath and smile at him, “I’m fine oppa. With BoRa unnie here I think you would want some time alone together.” I wink at him to assure him I was fine.

He smile at my action, I think he felt relieved that it wasn’t anything serious. “Thanks for the lunch Nicole. I’ll treat you next time.”

He ruffles my hair gently as I close my eyes to hold in my frustration. I forcefully smile at him as I bow to him and BoRa unnie one last time before waving them goodbye.

I held myself together as I begin to walk away from them. I could hear their giggling becoming faint as I walked further. I begin to sniffle and without realizing it tears began to slip from my eyes. I quickly bit my lips and shake my head to control my emotions but it wasn’t working. I quickly wipe away the tears before it gets worse.

I don’t know how long I sat at that bus stop but all I could remember were blurs of buses passing by through my teary eyes. The sun was setting when I finally got hold of myself and forced myself to head home. The bus ride had to be the longest ride I have ever taken before I decided to get off and just walk the rest of my way home. Tears were still slipping through as I walk down the sidewalk.

I took out my phone and scan through my contact list. Should I call the girls out for some comfort? Do they really want to be burdened with my problems?

Sigh.

I refrain myself from calling them. I felt like I should deal with this myself. I found myself standing in front of our usual hang out; Mango Six. I went in and decided to drown myself in chocolate. I ordered a large size chocolate milkshake and the biggest slice of double fudge cheesecake that I saw. I took a seat in the corner by the window as I stare at my order. Enjoy it! I told myself.

I took my fork and dug in to the cake. I took my first bite and I couldn’t help but begin to tear up again. I pinch my nose to try and stop the tears from coming but it didn’t help. It just continues to slip as I continue to take bite after bite of my piece of cake.

I hated myself for feeling like this. I didn’t expect it to hurt this much. Why did it have to feel like this! Get a grip Nicole, you’re stronger than this! Stop feeling so defeated! I scolded myself.

Finishing my cake and drink I fell on to the table as I sat there with my head nestled in my folded arms on the table, tears were still slipping but I didn’t care anymore. Trying to hold it back will only just make it worse, might as well just let it all out.

After a while of sitting in that slumped position I felt a gentle tap on my shoulder. I ignored it at first but it kept repeating itself. I thought it was one of the staff wanting to make sure if I was ok.

“I’m fine,” I mutter as I wave them off.

The tapping continues.

“I’m fine,” I wave them off again.

The tapping continues.

“I said I’m fine,” I force myself up to assure the staff.

To myself surprise, the moment I opened my eyes I see a handsome face smiling back me.

“WooHyun...” I utter.

“Hey,” he sweetly smiles, “you ok?”

The moment he asked me that I broke down again.

“Nicole, are you alright?” I could sense the concern in his voice.

I could feel him patting my back gently as I lay my head on the table and continue my sobbing. I hated feeling like this but I couldn’t control myself. I felt even worse now that I have someone I hardly knew sitting with me and trying his best to comfort me. I felt too awkward for him. I sat up from my seat and begin wiping away my tears with the napkins available on the table.

“Sorry WooHyun,” I apologize, “I didn’t want you or anyone to see me like this.”

“Are you ok? What happened?”

I let out a long sigh, “it’s just my own personal issue.”

“Anything I can help you with?” I could sense the genuine concern in his tone.

I smile appreciatively to him, “thanks for the offer, but it’s something that I have to deal with on my own.”

I slowly got up from my seat and he follows after.

“Where are you going now?”

“I think I’m just gonna head home. I think I need the comfort of my bed.” I answer him with an assuring smile.

“I’ll walk you home.” He offers.

I nodded my head and accepted the offer.

We were both in complete silence during our walk. I wasn’t really in the mood to have a conversation. My eyes were still stinging from my crying session and I just needed some quiet time to compose myself. I walked a few steps ahead of WooHyun as he quiet followed from behind. I would glance behind me here and there just to make sure that he was alright with following me.

“You don’t have to follow me all the way home WooHyun. I think I’m a bit better now. I can go the rest of the way myself.” I smile appreciatively at him.

He looks at me and his charming smile was once again on his face, “I don’t mind. I’m enjoying this little walk. I mean if you don’t mind me being here.”

I giggle at his sheepishness. I was actually giggling. “Of course I don’t mind. I’m enjoying your company.”

His smile got wider at my statement. He took a few steps forward as we continue our walk. We were now walking side by side. Still in silence but I was really enjoying having someone beside me. I think he knew I wasn’t in the mood to converse. Each time I glance over at him he still had his smile on his face, I couldn’t help but giggle each time I saw that smile of his. He was really lifting my mood.

“Thanks for walking me all the way home. I really appreciate it.” I thank him as we stood in front of my gate.

I can see his cheek getting a rosy pink as we stood underneath the streetlight. I couldn’t help but giggle at his shyness.

“Would you like to come in for something to drink? My way of thanking you for escorting me home.” I offer.

I can see him scratching the back of his head nervously. He sheepishly smiles at me, that charming smile of his still present. I don’t know what it was but he was looking quite handsome under the streetlight. His smile was quite infectious, I found myself smiling along with him as well.

“Yeah, if you don’t mind,” he answers sheepishly.

I open the front gates and we were about to walk in when we heard a voice calling out to WooHyun. We turn our attention towards the direction of the voice and of course it just had to be him.

“WooHyun!” I see him running up towards us.

He was the last person I wanted to see right now. I roll my eyes at the sight of him coming closer.

“Oh, Hoya,” WooHyun greets him.

“What are you doing here?” HoWon asks him and I could see him turning his attention to me, “what are you doing with her?”

It was just a simple question, there was no sense of disgust or negativity from his question but it just got to me and annoyed me that he called me ‘her’. I have a name you know. Was I being oversensitive? Maybe, but who can blame me, especially with the state that I was in. I had my reasons for my mood swings, and it wasn’t feminine issues.

“I walked Nicole home and she offered me something to drink.” WooHyun answers innocently. He was completely oblivious to my dislike of HoWon being in my presence.

“Really, why did you need to walk her home? Is there something wrong with her?” HoWon continues his questions as I see him trying to look closer at me.

I try to avert my attention from him but he just kept on coming closer.

“Why are your eyes so puffy? Were you crying?” He bluntly asks.

“Yah, Hoya. She was just going through some things.” WooHyun quickly defended me.

“Like what?” HoWon turns his attention back to me, “weren’t you meeting with WooRam hyung today? I thought you would be happy about that. What happened? He didn’t show up?”

At the mention WooRam oppa I shot him a cold glare.

“Shut up!” I shout at him.

“Yah,” he was clearly offended with my outburst, “I was just asking.”

Again with another emotional outburst at someone who didn’t deserve it. But a little part of me felt like HoWon did deserve it, just a little bit. I let out a sigh and turn my attention to WooHyun.

“Sorry WooHyun, if you don’t mind I just want to be alone now. I’ll make it up to you next time.” I bow and close my front gates and made my way towards my front door before he could answer.

I took a quick glance over at HoWon who was still standing there with a quizzical expression on his face before entering my house. Why does it seem like I always have to care about what he was thinking.

Sigh.

I fell back on my bed and stare up at my ceiling. After a few minutes I sat up on my bed and took off my purse. I stood up in front of my full length mirror and let out a long disappointed sigh. I sway my dress to and fro; I guess this dress was wasted today. Another sigh escapes my lips before changing in to my home clothes.

I stood in front of my bedroom window that faced directly across WooRam oppa’s window. My window had always been opened and the curtains tied to the side just so I can see him if I ever needed to or wanted to, but I guess there was no need for that anymore. I walk up to the window, letting out a disappointed sigh. I slide the window close and untie the curtains. This is one way for me to slowly get over him.

I sat on my bed as I held my Mr. Fluffy that I had abused last night tightly against me as I begin to tear up again. Numerous thoughts ran through my mind, replaying the whole situation over and over again. I came to the conclusion that if I truly cared for him than I would want him to be happy, and if BoRa unnie makes him happy, who was I to stand in their way. I should be happy for him too, I should be happy that he found someone that truly makes him happy. But a part of me wished that it was me who was the one to make him happy. I feel so conflicted!

I hear my phone ringing and without checking who it was I answer.

“Hello?”

“Yah, what’s wrong with you? KiBum called me and said that you were crying all day.” JinAh’s voice came echoing through the other line.

“Who told you?” I ask nonchalantly.

“Well KiBum told me and he said that his friend WooHyun called him and told him. He said that he had walked you home?”

“Yeah, he found me at Mango Six and offered to walk me home.”

“Are you ok?” The concern in her voice was about to make me cry again.

I bit my lips and begin to shake my head again, composing myself, “yeah, I’m fine now.”

“What’s wrong? You wanna talk? You want us to gather and listen to you? I can call the girls right now and we’ll be right over in a few minutes.”

I couldn’t help but smile at her offer, I was very grateful at that moment to have such great friends around me.

“No, don’t worry. I’m fine now. I just want some time to myself.”

“Alright, but don’t hesitate to call us if you need to.”

With that we ended our call. I decided maybe I should get some air. I slip on my slippers and made my way towards the front door. I took Mr. Fluffy with me for company. I got to my front porch and noticed the stars were slowly coming out. I took a seat on my porch bench and stare out in to my front yard. It was getting dark so I decided to turn on my porch lights. I needed this tranquil time to figure things out.

As I sat there gazing out at my front yard I suddenly notice some type of commotion coming from my front gates. Curiosity got the best of me and I found myself tiptoeing over towards the commotion. I peep through the openings of my gate door and I could see a figure walking back and forth. I squint my eyes to see if I can make out who it could be; no luck. Then out of the blue I start to hear mumbling, it was coming from the same figure that was walking back and forth. I was getting agitated with trying to figure out who it was. The next thing I did might have been of the stupidest thing I could ever do.

I unlock my gates and swung open the door. See, in this type of situation, it could have been any stranger that could easily ambush me and attack me because I was too reckless, but who I saw felt a lot more dangerous and maybe even scarier than any of those scenarios.

“HoWon?”

He stops his pacing and turns his attention towards at the mention of his name. It seemed like he was quite surprise to see me. Which I thought was stupid because it was my house that he was pacing back and forth in front of.

“What are you doing?” I question him.

“I...”

Was he stuttering? This was the second time I’ve seen him this aloof.

“Yes?” I look at him with a quizzical expression.

“I...”

“Are you ok?” I was getting impatient with his stuttering. “Is there something you want tell me since you were pacing back and forth in front of my house?”

“I...” He looks at me, I think he could tell that I was getting impatient, “why are you opening your doors without finding out who it is first? Sheesh, you could have gotten yourself in trouble. You really are a babo.” He lectures me with a serious tone and then starts to walk off.

With my mouth agape and my widen eyes I was completely taken aback at his sudden outburst. What the hell was that about?

“Yah!” I shout to him before he could disappear.

He stops in his tracks and I could see him turning around and coming back towards me. I sudden got nervous, what did I just get myself in to. I just got reminded of the first time he confronted me in front of my house and how intimidated he made me felt.

“You!” He points his finger at me.

I quickly shut my eyes. I squeeze them tightly as I prepared myself for the onslaught of verbal bashing that was surely to come.

“Sorry.”

I loosen my eyelid the moment I heard him uttered those words. Did I hear correctly? Did I really hear him say ‘sorry’? And it was to me?

I slowly open my eyes as I gaze at him, “pardon?”

He let out a sigh, “I said sorry.”

“For what?” I was really curious.

“For what I said earlier,” he answers quietly.

“What, calling me babo?”

“No, I still think you’re a babo. For being somewhat insensitive towards you earlier before,” he explains.

I was in complete awe at how mature he is acting towards me right now.

“I didn’t know that you were going through something bad until WooHyun explained to me,” he continues.

I hesitantly nodded.

He quickly clears his throat, “but that doesn’t mean that anything changes between us. I still think you’re conceited.”

And that completely ruined the whole mood. I was actually enjoying his sincere side but the moment he brought that up it completely destroyed my changing impression of him. And now he’s back to being the jerk that I highly despise. Now I have to question if he’s being sincere about his apology or it was just something he was doing just to toy with me.

“Why the sudden apology, I doesn’t seem like you truly care if you are being insensitive towards me or not. I mean last night you made it quite clear that you don’t like me. You were all for judging me without truly knowing me. Why suddenly with a vague incident that you are apology?”

He clears his throat and I knew that I had finally pinpointed his flaw. He was nervous alright, unable to truthfully answer.

“Because I felt like it was unfair of me to question you in such a way that made you felt uncomfortable.”

I scoff at his reason, “really? You made me a hell lot more uncomfortable last night with your judgments and a few weeks back when you cornered me in front of my house. I don’t see you feeling sorry or even apologizing for those incidents.”

“Because...” He grits his teeth.

“Because what?” I challenge him. I had to give him a good grilling for being such a jerk towards me.

“Because I was having a bad day,” he excused.

“Ha!” I scoff, “you expect me to believe that?”

“Look, are you going to accept my apology for earlier or not?”

I could tell me was getting annoyed with me playing him.

I smirk, “you wish. Not until you apologize and say you were wrong for all the things that has happened between us since I met you.”

“You should be apologizing to me for the bathroom incident!”

I stiffen at his mention of that. I turn to him and I could feel my cheeks heating up.

“Unless you did it intentionally and enjoyed what you saw.” He leans in closer to me with a mischievous smirk and a raised eyebrow.

I roll my eyes and push him away from me. “You’re nowhere close to WooRam oppa.”

Crap! Why did I have to mention WooRam oppa? I bit my lips regretting what I said.

He scoffs, “so you’ve seen WooRam hyung I see,” he chuckles teasingly at me, “how was your little date with him today anyway?”

I bit my lips harder at the reminder of today. “It was fine. I met up with him and we had lunch together.” I fronted, holding my tears as hard as I could.

He continues staring intently at me. His intense stare cause me to waver as I continue looking at him.

I quickly turn myself away from him, “I’m going back inside. I don’t want to talk to you anymore.”

“I guess you found your answer.” I hear him call out to me.

I stop in my tracks and took a deep breath. “Good night HoWon.”

I don’t know why I wished him a good night but it just felt like the right thing to do. I guess subconsciously I knew that he was trying to comfort me with his words. But I just needed to clear my head and just forget about today and just start anew tomorrow. I’m a strong girl that does not need to dwell on the past. I just need to keep moving forward. Tomorrow will be another day, a new day, and a new beginning!

A/N: Sorry Sistar fans, I didn't mean to use BoRa as the third party but I needed a minor character  and I was watching their Alone video while I was writing the chapter so I decided to use her. Please enjoy the chapter.