Chapter Four

I sat across from my father as I stared at him devouring the curry that I had made for our father daughter dinner. I couldn’t help but laugh at the sight of him gulping down the food so fast. I guess he really misses a proper home cooked meal. I suddenly felt sorry for him doing what he does for so long and being away from home so often.

He looks up from his plate noticing me staring at him.

“Are you not hungry sweetie?”

I was, I truly was, and it was curry of all foods, one of my favorites, but for some odd reason I had no appetite tonight. All I’ve been doing the whole time was watching my father enjoy himself and playing with my food. I let out a sigh and shook my head at him.

“You want something else to eat? Want me to boil up some ramen for you?”

I chuckle at his offer, “it’s ok appa. I’m just not in the mood to eat right now.”

“Really, then what was the purpose of this father daughter dinner then?” His right eyebrow rises as if suspicious of me.

I continue my chuckle at his insinuation, “why not? I can’t make my appa a proper home cook meal even if I don’t eat it myself?”

He let out a sigh as he puts down his utensils, “all right my precious YongJoo, what’s on your mind? Let this absentminded appa of yours help.”

‘My precious YongJoo,’ now I haven’t heard that in a long time. A lighthearted laugh escapes my lips. “It’s nothing appa, it’s no big deal, just me dealing with some personal issue of my own.”

“It’s not anything to do with female issues is it? Because you know I’m not good with those things. If you want you can talk to your teacher Ms. Lim about that. I’m... I’m not one to help you with that.”

He began to stutter and I couldn’t help but burst out laughing. The expression on his face was priceless. My laughter ceased as I look back at him with a smile.

“Nothing like that appa,” I let out a sigh, “have you ever thought about what you would want me to do with my life?”

There was a silence between us, but I can tell the way he was looking at with that smile of his. It was his I’m-proud-of-you-no-matter-what type of smile. He reaches for my hand from across the table and held it gently, assuring me that he’s proud of me no matter what.

“YongJoo honey, I’m proud of you no matter what you decide to do with your life. There’s no need for you to make me happy or anyone else happy for that matter, as long as you yourself is happy with your own choices than that’s all that matter.”

I couldn’t have asked for a better father. He allows me to be free and make my own choices, make my own mistakes, live the life that I wanted. But of course, at a moment like this I couldn’t help but have some fun with him.

He smiles sweetly at me before grabbing his cup of juice and taking a sip.

“What if I told you that I’ve been having unprotected ?”

The juice forms a lump in his throat.

“I’m currently pregnant.”

He begins to choke.

“And I don’t know who the father is.”

And there it came. He spat the juice all over the table.

He begins to cough, his eyes widened, “what?!”

I glance up at him as he stood up from his seat.

“I want to keep the baby appa.” I continued my little charade.

He stares at my with a worried and disappointed expression, “YongJoo honey, how could you... I mean... why would you... but what made you...”

He was at a lost for words, he couldn’t fathom I had gotten myself in to this type of situation.

“But I thought you’re proud of me no matter what I choose to do with my life?”

“I am but...” he continues to stutter, “but I didn’t mean something like this.” He let out an exasperated sigh, “I was talking about your schooling and what you’ve done at home for us, and... and... all that has been positive about your life. Sweetie, I love you, but why would you get yourself in to a situation like this?”

I couldn’t take it anymore as I begin to laugh aloud in front of him, clutching to my stomach to contain myself.

“What... what’s so funny?” He sits down on his seat across from me with a lost and confused expression.

“Appa, I was only kidding,” I said to him as I stood up and turns sideway to him, “see? Look,” I lifts my shirt up to show him my stomach, “nothing there but flatness,” I added as I begin to pat it roughly.

He was still lost and confused.

I smile sweetly at him as I made my over to his side, “you do care about what I do appa. And I appreciate it, if you want to give any input, feel free to do so. To be honest, I’m a little lost right now at what I want to do with my life, especially once high school is done.”

I finally confessed to him about what was bothering me. I heard a sigh of relief from him and couldn’t help but giggle at his reaction.

“YongJoo honey, don’t scare your appa like that again. I can’t handle something like that, not yet anyway, not until you’re older and married.”

I smiled at him and pecked his cheek, “don’t worry appa, I’ll be careful.”

He let out another sigh of relief, “I can’t really give you any advice on what you should do after high school, that’s completely up to you. But I know you’ll make the right and smart decision for yourself, and once you do I’ll be there to support you.” He made sure he emphasized those words.

“Thanks appa.”

There’s only me and my father in this household, so of course he dotes on me, I’m his “precious YongJoo” after all. Does that mean I take advantage of the fact? Of course not, my mother and father raised me better than that, I know better and handle myself with grace and dignity. Yes, sometimes the choices I make are blinded by outer influences but it never stopped me from being who I’ve always thought of myself to be.

So much for father daughter night, after we finished dinner, and the unfortunate but hilariously enjoyable discussion of where my life was going, my father was called back to work. But who was I to keep him away. He liked what he did so there was no way of me keeping him from it.

I sat on my couch, staring at the television in front of me, mindlessly clicking away. I look at the clock on the wall, 8:30PM, another early night. I glance over at my cell phone and opened the message I had received from WooHyun a couple hours ago, do I go to the party or not. I was just planning to spend the night with appa but now that he’s off at work I had a choice to make; face HoWon and deal with any possible event that might occur or avoid him completely and stay in the safety of my own house to prevent any possible confrontation.

If I go, I’ll be stepping in to his territory, it’s his house after all. But then again, what was there for me to be scared of? He was the one that should be embarrassed for what he did to me, even WooHyun said so. And besides, I was invited by WooHyun to come. If only I had called my friends to come along as well for some moral support just in case anything idiotic happens.

I sigh in to slump once I realized that I should have prepared myself better if I was to go. Feeling defeated after all that contemplating I decided to just drag myself up to my bed and just call it a night.

I stood at the bottom of my staircase when I heard my doorbell. I wonder who could be coming over at this time of hour. I peep through my door panel window to see KiBum and my girl friends waving back at me. I was completely surprise. I opened the door and greeted them with a puzzled expression.

“What are you guys doing here?”

“We’re here to party!” JinAh announces excitedly.

“Where? Here?” I was still very much confused.

“No, HoWon’s place, you know your neighbor?” KiBum mischievously winks at me.

I quickly turn to HaRa who quickly shook her head.

“Please, HaRa didn’t tell us anything,” KiBum assures, “you think I wouldn’t find out sooner or later Nicole? Don’t you know who I am?” He leers at me.

HaRa rolls her eyes at his response, “princess here somehow knows WooHyun.”

I was even more confused at this point, “you know WooHyun? How?”

“Is that how you got all that information about HoWon?” JinAh chimes in.

I was curious too, was that really where he got his information from?

“Once again, I have my sources.” He responded as he made his way over to my porch bench.

The girls rolled their eyes.

“So what are you waiting for? Hurry up and go change.” JinAh quickly urges.

“Yeah Nicole, we were invited to come so let’s go. Let’s have some more fun tonight.” HaRa added in excitedly, “and if anything does go wrong, you live like right across from him, a lot easier for you to get home.”

I was hesitant. I did want to go but then I didn’t. I was being real indecisive. Seeing my hesitation the girls push me back in to my house and up the stairs to my room to pick out an outfit for me.

“We’ll be right back.” JinAh shouted to KiBum who continues to sit on my porch bench texting away.

“Now, let’s pick something out that won’t make you look like you’re coupling with HoWon.” HaRa commented as we stared at my closet.

Needless to say JinAh and JooHyun were confuse with what she had meant and I was not about to relive that moment again so I’ll leave it as so.

***

“So you never told us how you knew WooHyun.” I queried KiBum as we made our way over to HoWon’s house.

“Childhood friends, my parents and his parents are friends. My mom and his mom are like best friends. We meet up once in awhile here and there.” He answers casually.

“So does that mean you knew HoWon from before as well?” JinAh asks.

“I thought I didn’t but apparently he’s the ‘Hoya’ that he kept talking about every time I met up with him.”

“Hoya?” JinAh and JooHyun asked in unison.

“Apparently that’s HoWon’s nickname or something. WooHyun kept calling him that the other night.” I answered, at least I knew something.

JinAh and JooHyun nodded in understanding. I turn back to KiBum, “so that means you knew about him being at our school way before then.” I interrogated him.

KiBum leers at me as if I was an idiot, “I told you I didn’t know. WooHyun and I met up one day and he asked me how is friend ‘Hoya’ was doing. I didn’t know who he was referring to and that was when he told me.”

“Did WooHyun also tell you all that information about him?” HaRa chimed in.

KiBum releases an annoyed sigh, we girls were starting to get on his nerve and I couldn’t help but enjoy every moment of it, he deserved it. He nodded in response. And here I thought he was some undercover agent who manages to dig up information and gossip on his own merit, I was about to commend him for a job well done but it all turns out to be false. Only to find out it was just a fluke. So much for that KiBum, you had me excited.

We knocked on the gate and WooHyun comes out with that charming smile of his plastered on his face.

“KiBum!” He greeted happily giving him a hug. He turns to me and my girl friends. Needless to say he was surprise that we were with KiBum, “you guys know each other?”

“Yeah, these were the friends that I told you I was going to bring.”

“What a coincidence.” WooHyun laughs wholeheartedly, “come on in guys. The party’s just getting started.”

We walk in and to my surprise there weren’t many people there.

“Is this it? Is anyone else coming?” HaRa asks bluntly.

WooHyun laughs at her question, “yeah, pretty much. Hoya doesn’t like having many people around. It was me who wanted to invite you guys.”

I scan the room and the only people I saw where HoWon’s friends from the other night. That was pretty much it, and of course now us.

“This is no party,” JinAh whispers to me and I couldn’t help but chuckle at her statement.

It’s true this was no party, just a simple get together of friends. But I didn’t see the host of the night.

“Where’s HoWon?” I couldn’t help but ask.

WooHyun scans the room and was surprise himself, “I don’t know. He was here a few minutes ago,” he turns to me, “don’t worry about him, come let me introduce you guys to our friends.”

He walks us over to the couch where his friends were situated and playing their video games. KiBum had already settled himself down amongst them and playing with them. I recognized some of the friends that were there but there were a few new faces.

“You probably remember SungGyu hyung, DongWoo hyung, and SungYeol. This is MyungSoo and SungJong. Guys,” he turns his attention to his friends and turns back to us, “these here are KiBum’s friends. This is Nicole and HaRa,” he glance over at JinAh and JooHyun and pauses, “sorry I didn’t get your names,” he apologizes sheepishly to them.

“This is JinAh and JooHyun,” I introduced.

We all greeted each other respectfully. We girls just stood there, a bit awkward as what to do next. KiBum of course was now immersed in playing games with the other guys.

“So seriously, this is it for guests?” HaRa was never one to sugar coat much. We girls couldn’t help but laugh at her bluntness.

WooHyun chuckles sheepishly as he scratched the back of his head, “I wanted to invite more people but Hoya didn’t want to. He just wanted a small gathering instead.” Seeing our awkwardness he offers us some food, “there’s refreshments in the kitchen, come I’ll show you.”

He led us in to the kitchen and begins pouring us some drinks.

“Thank you.” I said as I took a sip of my drink.

“There’s more if you want anything else.”

“You’re a very good host, too bad the actual host is nowhere to be seen.” HaRa teases.

“Yeah, I don’t know where he went,” begins to scratch his head sheepishly. He turns to me and noticed my empty cup. “You want another drink Nicole?” He offers.

I smile at him and shook my head, “I’m good for now thanks.”

“So do we just stand around and just eat and drink the whole night?” JinAh wondered. She too was not pleased with the lack of ‘partying’ that this “party” was supposed to have.

We heard the boys in the living room shouting and screaming in excitement, probably from their little game.

“Sorry ladies, it is Hoya’s place so I had to do what he asked. If it helps you’re free to come and join us in our gaming.” WooHyun offers sheepishly.

I felt bad for him, trying to accommodate us and my friends were not too pleased with the result this so called “party”, I was too but I wasn’t about to make him feel any worse.

“Don’t worry about it WooHyun, thank you for inviting us. We’ll be fine. You can go back in there. We’ll come in later if anything.” I assured him.

He smiles sheepishly at me before he slowly heads back in to the living room. I can tell he was still sorry for not being able to please us.

I could hear a sigh from HaRa, “maybe we shouldn’t have come at all.”

“C’mon guys, since we’re here anyway let’s make the best of it.” I tried to be positive.

“We can always go back over your house and just spend our night there.” JinAh suggested.

“Wouldn’t that be a bit rude? We just got here and we’re leaving already?” JooHyun reasoned.

“I agree, let’s just try our best and make it fun,” I added.

JinAh and HaRa both let out a defeated sigh.

“Fine, then what can we do then?” HaRa was not too pleased to be staying.

We all hesitated for a bit, “we can go back in there and join them in their gaming.” I suggested.

What else can we really do, this wasn’t our place and it seems that the whole “party” is happening in the living room with the boys playing their video games. The girls reluctantly agreed. JooHyun suggested that we bring in the drinks and snacks for them and I agreed.

“Alright boys, we’re joining you.” HaRa announces as we walked back in. I couldn’t help but laugh at her tone. You can tell she wasn’t too keen on this idea.

“We also brought in the snacks and drinks so it’ll be easier for you guys.” JooHyun added as she and I placed the food down on the side table.

Everyone thanked us and I could see WooHyun smiling appreciatively at me, I can tell that he still felt a bit guilty for inviting us here and not really giving us the “party” that we were hoping for. But to be honest, I didn’t care too much about it. I would’ve preferred a small gathering like this than something crowded.

“Alright then, let’s get playing,” HaRa begins to roll up her sleeves and she sat down beside KiBum and grabs the controller from him.

JinAh and JooHyun were making themselves comfortable as well as they joined HaRa by KiBum’s side. I stood behind the couch as I watched them enjoying themselves. I guess we turned an awkward situation in to a comfortable one for both sides. I noticed WooHyun making is way beside me and I smile at him.

“Thanks.” He whispers to me.

I smile at him and I swear if I didn’t know better he blushed.

“So is HoWon ever going to show up?” I was still curious at his whereabouts. For some reason I catch myself asking about him this whole entire time.

“I really don’t know where he went. I wouldn’t be surprised if he was off somewhere by himself,” WooHyun chuckles, “this whole thing wasn’t really his idea.”

“How do you guys all know each other?”

“Well everyone here is from the same dance class, we’re quite close. And of course I know KiBum personally and then there’s you and your friends who by the way I was surprise to know that you know KiBum as well.”

I chuckle at his surprised expression, “well we go to the same school and we’ve known him since the beginning of high school, and that’s where I met the girls. HaRa and I have known each other since middle school. But knowing KiBum for so long I’ve never heard him mention you.”

It was his turn to laugh, “same here, I’ve never heard him mention you.”

“Typical of him, he likes to keep everything separate. I’m surprise he even considered bringing us along today.”

I found myself having a private conversation with WooHyun as the others were playing their games. We made our way to the kitchen as I grabbed a cup and ice. As I was pouring my drink, WooHyun had lifted himself up on to the counter of the island in the kitchen. I grabbed another cup and offered it to him. He took it as I made my way to one of the stool by the island.

“So did you meet HoWon at school?”

I sheepishly laugh once I thought about my answer, “you can say that.”

“What do you mean?” He was puzzled at my answer.

I continue my sheepish laugh, “to be honest, I never knew he existed until a few days ago on the last day of school. He was getting in to a fight with one of the guys at school that I knew and that’s how I found out about him.”

“He got in to a fight?” He seemed quite surprise at the discovery, “well, I guess I could see how, he does have quite a bit of a temper. I guess that’s why he was so depressed that night.”

“How long have you known HoWon? And what’s with you calling him Hoya?” I found myself asking. I was beginning to get more and more curious about HoWon.

“Well I’ve known him for a few years now. We’ve been going to the same dance school and class for almost four years now. It was quite a trip for him though, coming from GwangJu every time. He would stay over at my house a few times. I was quite happy to find out that his family was moving to Seoul. It would make it easier for him and for the rest of us to see him.”

“You guys are really that close huh?”

“Well we share very similar interests so it wasn’t hard for us to get along.”

“And what would those interests be?” I didn’t know why I asked that but it just came out.

“Music, dance, sports, amongst other things, Hoya is quite the athlete. He tries his best to excel in any sports he plays. Me, not so much,” he chuckles at himself, “but we both have the same dreams and aspirations. We both and the rest of guys as well. We dream of one day performing together on a big stage like the Seoul Olympic Gymnasium.”

I raised an eyebrow of curiosity, “so like one of those idol groups?”

He smiles sheepishly at me, almost embarrassed to admit it.

“You guys want to become an idol star?”

He chuckles sheepishly at my assumption and hesitantly nodded as he scratched the back of his head nervously.

“Wow, those are big aspirations,” to be honest I would never have thought someone like HoWon would have such a dream, he just seems so... un-idol like.

“You think it’s funny don’t you?”

“No, I don’t,” I quickly assures, “at least you guys know what you guys want to do with your lives.” Who was I to laugh at someone who has a dream and knows what they want, where I’m still confuse and unsure about everything. “Then what about the whole Hoya thing?” I asked again.

“Oh that? Well it’s just a nickname we made for him. I don’t even remember how it came about. It was just something random we came up with one day. But he liked it so he told us to just call him that from then on, sort of like his very own stage name.”

Wow, I was learning more and more about this mysterious HoWon more and more, it was quite interesting. Should I start to call him Hoya as well now? Hoya: the next idol star. I laugh to myself at the idea.

“What’s so funny?” I was caught.

“Oh nothing,” I look up at him with a smile, “just the thought of HoWon as an idol star that’s all.”

He laughs along as well. I guess the thought of HoWon being an idol star isn’t odd to just me.

“I know what you mean, but he’s a really talented dancer. You should see him one of these days.”

“I hope I get to,” I didn’t know why I said that, not like I care if he was talented or not, but it just came out.

“You seem to want to know a lot about Hoya.”

I was caught off guard with his sudden statement.

“Um... not really... I mean,” I was stuttering, why was I stuttering, what was there to be embarrass about, “I was just curious at how he manages to keep such a low profile the whole time during school, that’s all.”

He chuckles at my stuttering. “It’s just his way. He doesn’t like being the center of attention. He likes to keep to himself.”

I look at him quizzically, and as if picking up on my hint and what I was about to ask next he just smiles.

“I know. How can someone with a personality like him want to be an idol star? Well I guess he just wants to showcase his talents.”

“But that means being in the spotlight and being at the center of attention.” I was still so puzzled.

He continues his chuckling, “I guess you can ask him that yourself. I wouldn’t know how to answer that.”

I quickly shook my head, “that’s perfectly fine, I don’t need to know.” I would like to avoid as much face to face interaction with him as much as I can.

“Now you know a little more about Hoya. Was there anything you wanted to know about me?”

I was taken aback by his forward question. I glance up at him with a smile, “what would you like to tell me about yourself?”

“Well, let me think.” He paused for a minute to think. “You already know about my dreams and aspirations, my relationship with Hoya, my relationship with KiBum. What else can I tell you? Let me think.”

I would be dunce if I didn’t completely pick up on what he was hinting at so I decided to play along.

“You know if this was a date you should be asking about me to get to know me rather than asking me what I want to know about you.”

He was caught off guard with my teasing, and I could tell from the blushing of his cheeks.

“I...” He clears his throat, “whatever you want to tell me about yourself I’m ready to listen.”

I laugh at his blushing cheeks. I can’t deny how cute and charming WooHyun is being at that moment. We continue our conversation and I’ll admit it, there was some harmless flirting on my part, he is after all quite charming. And that smile of his, it was quite contagious. Our conversation however didn’t last too long after. We were abruptly interrupted by the sudden presence of the host of the night. HoWon had finally showed up.

He had entered through the kitchen door that led out to the backyard.

“Were you out there this whole time?” WooHyun asked the moment he noticed him standing by the door.

He didn’t answer but just glances over from WooHyun and then to me. I smile at him meekly. I raised my hand as a sign of greeting. There was still no reaction from him as he blankly stares at me before turning his attention back to WooHyun.

“I’m gonna go upstairs to get change.”

WooHyun nodded. HoWon made his way through the kitchen and the moment he walked passed me I could see the sweat dripping down his forehead. There were still bruises on his face from the fight, they were slowly fading away though, it didn't seem too obvious.

“What was he doing out there?” I couldn’t help but ask.

“Probably exercising,” WooHyun answers, “that’s why I told you he’s a really good athlete. He’s constantly keeping active.”

“I really don’t understand him. Was it really hard to just say hi? A simple smile would have been nice,” I couldn’t help but express my annoyance at his manners.

WooHyun just laughs. “Don’t mind that too much, that’s how he is. He just isn't comfortable with you yet. Trust me, there’s a whole completely different side to Hoya that you’ll be surprise to see once you get to know him better. He’s quite fun.”

I snort at the thought. Someone like him having another side other than the cold and rude side that I’ve seen? I highly doubt I would even want to get to know him any further if this is the type of first impression I get from him.

WooHyun and I made our way back in to the living to join the rest of the group. By now HaRa, JinAh, and JooHyun have comfortably adjusted to the group of guys. They were actually enjoying themselves and getting really in to the games. I laugh at the sight of them fighting for and hogging the game.

I excused myself to the bathroom but not before asking WooHyun where it was. I made my way up the stairs and I tried to remember what he told me; up the stairs and the last door on the right. I got up to the top and of course my minds starts to get confuse. I look to my right and noticed three doors, so it was the last door. I look and made way towards the door at the end but then I got confuse when I stood in front of the door and then noticed another door in the same corner. Wait, so which one is it? I was confused and nervous. I didn’t want to be entering a stranger’s private space. A light bulb went off in my head when I realized all bathrooms are made with ceramic floors. Nicole you genius! I slowly bent down to the small opening space at the bottom of the door to see which one had the ceramic floor. I was relieved to find that it was the other door that had the ceramic floor. That saved me the embarrassment of almost entering someone’s bedroom. I patted myself on the back mentally to have thought of such a smart idea.

Still crouching, I sigh happily at my discovery. Reaching my hand up to grab hold of the doorknob to open the door when the door suddenly swung open, I was thrown off balance finding myself falling forward. I fell face first as I lay there with utter surprise, I open my eyes to see a pair of feet standing right in front of me.

Oh. My. God.

I slowly and hesitantly lift up my head to see HoWon standing there in nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist, his hair still wet, droplets of water still dripping down his surprisingly toned body, with his wide eyes staring back at me. My eyes widened as I quickly shot up from the floor and turn my back to him.

“What the hell are you doing?!”