As Jiyong opened the door to his apartment, a familiar scent greeted him.
It’s been awhile and he misses being in his own little place that he called home.

Looking around, everything seems the same.
From the living room to the kitchen, everything is clean and in place.
It’s all thanks to her.

Remembering the reason why he came back, he scrambled to his feet and went straight to his room.

With his heart racing, he quickly opened the door.

There she was. The person he's been wanting to see all this time.

He found her sitting on the edge of the bed with her back facing the door.
She was staring out the window in deep trance.

“Baby,” He called, taking a step forward.

When she heard his voice, she just glanced to the side, acknowledging his presence.

It didn’t surprise him that she acted that way.
He did something unforgiveable and he knew he deserves more than just her silence.

They haven’t seen each other in months.
Their groups are constantly travelling back and forth from one country to another, doing series of concerts and promotions.

Since Big Bang is touring around Asia, US, & Europe, it wasn’t easy for Jiyong to take time off and fly to wherever she was just so they can spend quality time together.
 
Both understood the nature of their work, it didn’t bother them much if they don’t see each other for as long as they keep in touch on a regular basis.

All is well until suddenly, for some reason, their communication started becoming less and less.
Calls and messages don’t come as often as they used to.
Lots of times, instead of saying words of encouragement to each other, they argue until there's no more words left to say.

He admits to himself that it was his fault.
He was the one who started changing.
Going to different places and meeting different kinds of people got him all excited that he neglected her.

Seeing her today in his apartment was a big surprise to him.
After all that has happened, he was immensely relieved to find her in his room.

“Dara… baby,” He spoke softly, taking quick strides towards her.

He stood in front of her but she didn’t bother to look up and meet his gaze.
With dejection written on her face, she just stared blankly at the floor.
 
Not for long, he noticed something on top of the bed.
Scattered beside her were magazines and newspapers with pictures of him.

Confirming that the news did get to her, he started feeling tense.

Although he already expected this, he can’t help but feel scared.
In his mind he was thinking that there is no way she’ll make it easy for him.

Picking up one of the magazines, he broke out into a cold sweat after seeing the cover.
Nervously, he scanned the other magazines and newspapers as well.

He found out that the highlight of every article is his picture making out in a club with a famous American pop star.

Feeling completely guilty for what he did, he immediately knelt in front of her and reached for her hands that were resting on her lap.
He squeezed them gently as he tilted his head trying to get a glimpse of her face.

Even if she averted her gaze from him, he can still clearly see the tears that were forming in her eyes.

“Baby, look at me.” He begged as he reached out a hand to cup the side of her face. “Talk to me, please.”

When she flinched away from his touch he got up and sat beside her on the bed.

He pulled her towards him and wrapped his arms around her.

 “Dara, I’m sorry.” He said while caressing the back of her head. “I promise you that this will never happen again. Please forgive me.”

He can feel her heavy breathing and her body shaking.
It was evident that she was crying.

He soothed her back and kissed the side of her temple. “I’m really really sorry baby. Please don’t cry.”

His gaze suddenly landed somewhere that made his eyes widen in shock.

Because he was too excited to see her, he failed to notice the suitcase standing beside the door.
 

He quickly pulled away form her.

“What’s the meaning of that, Dara?’ He asked, pointing behind her.


Dara wiped the tears from her eyes and forced herself to look at him.

“I’m leaving, Jiyong.” She quietly said.

He heard her but he didn’t want to believe her.

 “No you’re not.” He said shaking his head.

She flashed him a cold glare and scoffs. “Yes, I will. Just watch me.”

She was about to get up but Jiyong stopped her by holding her down. “No, you’re not leaving me Dara.”

Thinking it’s just one of those arguments where he needs to calm her down and convince her, he locked her in his arms.

“Let go, Jiyong!” She squirmed.

It took him by surprise when he felt her struggle with force.
Afraid that she might hurt herself, he let her go.

As soon as he did, without hesitation, she stood up and walked briskly towards the door.
Seeing this, Jiyong pushed himself off the bed and rushed over to her.

Unintentionally, he grabbed her roughly by the arm.

“You’re not going anywhere, Dara.” His voice was dark and filled with command.

She winced as she pulled her arm away from him. “Let go!”

When he realized he was hurting her, he released her.
He never grabbed her like that before but something inside him burst when he saw her walking away from him.

“Let’s talk about this.” He calmly said to her.

“There’s nothing to talk about.” She said, rubbing the arm that he held.

His eyes softened.
He tried to reach for her again but she held up her hand to stop him.

“I don’t want to talk about it, Jiyong.”

She was halfway from picking up her suitcase when he wrapped his arms around her tiny waist from behind.

“Jiyong, please.” She jerked her body but he just held on to her tighter.

“I was wrong. I admit it. It’s all my fault.” He said with remorse as he rested his chin on her shoulder. “Please don’t leave me Dara. I don’t know what I’ll do if you leave me.”

It was the truth. He has been through a lot of relationships in the past, but his relationship with Dara was the longest. She was the first woman he gave his whole heart to. He loves her so much that he can’t imagine himself being with another woman. Because of her, he began envisioning his future.

What made him do what he did? That question will forever haunt him. He didn’t mean to do it, but as a man, his urges are still there. Right now, he is full of regret and he wants to do things right.

“I’m tired of this, Jiyong.” She said in a shaky voice. “I gave you everything but you still…” Her voice trailed off as tears began to stream down her cheeks.  

He felt a sharp pain in his heart when he heard her say those things.
She did give him everything.
Including her innocence.
He will be forever grateful that she trusted him with all her heart.

He turned her around to face him. “Please baby, let me prove to you how much I love you and how sorry I am for hurting you.”

Jiyong hand went to search the pocket of his jacket.
He later pulled out a small velvet box.
He opened the box in front of her, revealing a diamond ring.

Dara stood frozen in shock with her eyes widened in disbelief.
It was the most beautiful ring she has ever seen.

“Will you marry me, Park Sandara?” He popped the question.

Her eyes darted at the ring, then him.
She should be jumping for joy and screaming her lungs out but instead, she shook her head with tears rolling down her face.

Jiyong felt his heart sank seeing her response.
In a desperate move, he took her hand and inserted the ring without her permission.

He looked straight into her eyes, pleading. “Don’t leave me, I’m begging you. I love you so much that I can't bear the thought of losing you.” His voice cracked as he squeezes her hands. “Please say you’ll marry me, Dara. Please.”

Dara stared at him blankly.
Deep inside those are the words that she’s been waiting to hear from him.
She wanted this. She wants to be his wife and spend the rest of her life with him.
But she can’t shrug the feeling that was bothering her from the moment he proposed.

He of all people should know that the problem they are facing now isn’t something to be taken lightly.
He cheated on her.
After what he did she can’t believe he went on his way proposing to her like it was the last of his cards.
To her it was a cheap move to propose marriage at a time like this.

Feeling offended with his gesture, she removes the ring and placed it in his hand.

“I can’t believe you did this, Jiyong.” Her voice filled with hurt.

Astounded and confused, he tilted his head wondering. “W-what? What do you mean, Dara? W-what did I do?”

“How dare you propose to me just for the sake of me forgiving you?” Her voice faltered and she started sobbing.

Jiyong’s jaw dropped. He didn’t know what to say.
He was caught between bewilderment and feeling displeased.

He wanted to hold her but he was way too confused. “H-how can you think of it that way, Dara?”

She wiped her tears as she reached down to grab her suitcase. “Forget it Jiyong. It’s over.”
 

-----+===[AUTHOR'S NOTE]===+-----

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