Chapter 1

“I love you.”

These are the final words that I had last said to him.
These last three words are like the trigger point that ended our friendship.
Maybe to the others, these three words are words of confession, words of affection, words that are meant to be said in a heart racing moment.
But to me, these are words of that are meant to be the final conversation between us; these are words of frustration, anger and exhaustion.

“Sorry…”

And lastly, this is the only word that has been ringing in my ear for the past five months.

Perhaps this whole conversation is just simply a whole retarded stupid rejection. But to me, it’s the worse heartbreak ever. And finally I understood what they mean by, sometimes, the things that hurt you the deepest isn’t the worse insult. But, it is the simplest word, coldest expression and that numbing sensation.

That is a confession to my best friend, a friend who I had been with for the length of five years.
Have you ever tried to controlled your feelings for someone that whom you are very close to? You simply knew the answer, but the more you tried to control your feelings, the harder you tried to keep away and hide your feelings, the stronger that feeling will grow, and in the end? It would just go ‘boom!’ and explode by some minor incidents that happened. Stupid isn’t it? I thought too.

“Tak, tak, tak.” I can still feel the heavy raindrops hitting hard onto my body. As if, punishing me for falling in love with my bestest friend. As if, trying to hit me and keep me awake, telling me to stop day dreaming- it’s impossible.

However, it was that day that I decided. I don’t want to keep these feelings to myself any longer. I couldn’t keep it inside of me anymore. The contents, that feeling- love, for him is flowing out of my heart.

“Don’t.” I gripped tightly onto the end of his shirt. Feeling the rain flowing from my head down to the end of my long hair, as they drip down, “tak, tak, tak.” It was as if they are substituting my tears that just couldn’t roll down from my stubborn eyes.

“Krystal…?” that shocked expression on his face. My guess is correct. He never knows, he never knew.

“Don’t go…” I repeated myself again, as I looked up at his pretty face. That face that captured many hearts. But, it was not this face that captured mine; it was his gentle personality, caring attitude.

“Why are you being like this?” he asked, with his eyebrows furrowed together. “She needs me.” he said in a harsh tone. It was like an order, like a command to let go of my hands.

Yeah, I know it, I know it perfectly. He doesn’t like me. He was taken, by a girl, an absolutely gorgeous one. A girl with an angelic face, feminine appearance, perfect body line, girlish attitude and lastly, a brilliant mind. But the main point is, she is a girl that is so different from me, a girl that is completely opposite from me, that type of girl who only can capture his heart.

Yeah, I know it, so well, so perfectly. But, sometimes, there are things that cannot be controlled. I cannot always be that friend to support him, I cannot always be that friend to be around him, to joke with him, and neither can I be that friend who would always treat him as only just a friend.

But, I too, was a normal girl who would fall in love with a guy that has a great looking pretty face, a guy with a great caring personality, a guy who treats a girl well. I too was a girl who would fall in love with that someone who she longs to be with, who she thinks that she could rely on, who she could think of as a prince charming, a knight, a hero, a lover.

But in the end, the selfish wish of mine didn’t come true. Well, I guess, the whole thing about wishing upon a meteor star is just crap bull that would only fool silly little girls who believe in those naïve fairy tales. I was once belonged in that group of silly little girls when I had just fallen in love with my best friend. But now, I had my eyes wide open. There is no Cinderella in this world. The gorgeous people still falls in the same category while the ugly looking ones are forbidden to get involve or to taint their beautiful world.

I lay on my bed as perspiration slowly starts to evaporate away. Again, yes, again, I was awoken by that scary nightmare that would come to haunt me down every night. That explains my dark circles around my eyes. However, though I had already awoken from that terrifying nightmare, but why did that scene continued to play in my head and even worse, that rainfall from that night still continue hitting onto my bare skin as I stared up at the ceiling with my arms wide open, “is this a mistake? Is falling in love with my best friend a mistake?”
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Short chapter. Sorry about it.
But this is how I want the first chapter to feels like.
I had finished all the chapters since long ago and it feels good to be able to finally upload it. ;D
Will finish updating all the chapters by 31stdec as that is the due date.
Hence, will be updating quite often. Though there will only be four chapters. ><
Thanks for everyone who commented and subscribed. It's greatly appreciated. ;D
Enjoy this first short chapter!

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