Fourth Movement: Saint honesty by Sara Bairelles

We're leaving all the windows open, we don't even mind the rain or where we let the floors get wet, so what if the hardwood stains? 'Cause we're collecting evidence of one remarkable storm, how wild it was to find it, finally feel the climate instead of only staying dry and warm. Rain on us, Saint Honesty, salvation is coming in the morning, but now what we need is a little rain on our face from you, sweet Saint Honesty.

A/N: This is an eighteen pages chapter! HAHA, be prepared. 

...

The silence inside the oncall room was unbelievably loud. Joohyun was clearly considering her words, Seungwan could tell... She was thinking hard about her words.

What should I say or do for you to come to me? What is necessary to break these barriers you built, she wondered while keeping her eyes trained on her... and, as expected, she got distracted by her beauty. Her deer eyes, so bright, her perfect eyebrows... The symmetry of her whole face, her small nose and her soft, pink, lips.

It never ceased to amuse her, God, how gorgeous was that woman, exactly? 

You are so, so gorgeous - Seungwan whispered, charmed by her.

Joohyun scoffed and even doing that, even showing an annoyed face, she was beautiful.

Beautiful...

Stop flirting, Son Seungwan. - Joohyun ranted.

Seungwan smiled.

I am not flirting, I am telling the ultimate truth. You are the prettiest, beautiful, the most gorgeous woman in the whole world... The most amazing woman in the whole world! - she started to say. 

Man, if someone gave her the opportunity she would spend a whole day only praising Joohyun.

She didn't notice how Joohyun's eyes started to change hearing her unstop flirty words, or how close she had got... she didn’t know, but for Joohyun it was never about elaborate acts… she liked that, to watch Seungwan talk using all her vast vocabulary, she liked how smart she was, how smart were the things she said, how she got excited and confident while speaking about something she loved.

There was a limit for everything, a limit for how much a person could endure… she has reached hers.

Joohyun felt so attracted by her, so impatient when watching her speak so confidently, saying all those flirty words to her… her eyes so bright, a smile on her lips… she felt like she was about to lose it for real, about to just... 

Seungwan didn't get to finish her monologue about her beauty, Joohyun got really tired, tired of listening and being teased, tired of pretending she didn’t want it, tired of pretending she wasn’t actually a hungry beast, and decided to take what she wanted.

She kissed her. 

...

Seungwan gasped, overstrucked.

Bae Joohyun was kissing her...

And it was so, so crazy, that her brain went malfunction because it didn't match her expectations. Her unnie had always been a careful person, she was collected and calm, that was her.

Years of friendship and she could say that she had seen her angry a few times? Yes, she had. Seungwan had seen her shout too...but it was so rare? Things must have really upset her for that to happen. If someone asked her opinion she would say that the most impressive trait of her personality was how she was able to handle the most unexpected kind of situations and still keep her cool.

She didn't yell, or fight anyone, but still she made you listen to her. Just her presence changed the atmosphere.

She was that good.

But…

Joohyun was not the said person at that moment. She was not careful, neither gentle. Her hands were keeping Seungwan down in place, possessively hard and she hovered over her with a suffocating aura. Seungwan was able to see her face now, her eyes had adjusted to the dim clarity, and it was...war. Joohyun's eyes were war, they were so different, so turbulent, hard... Angry.

She took her lips one, two, three times never giving her much room to breathe or to run. Her teeth tested the resistance of her lips, biting it hard and her tongue was mind blowing… skilled. She was so demanding, bossy... dominating the whole thing, not letting her move, not giving her space to even think properly. 

Seungwan gasped for air.

Breathe, Son Seungwan. - she whispered like the devil, remembering her to do something that, at that moment, seemed something completely impossible to do.

Seungwan took a really deep breath, but it didn’t help her calm down.

How can I breathe when y-you're on top of me? - Seungwan said, stammering a little. 

Am I squishing you? - she asked, staring down at her with attentive eyes.

And Seungwan forgot for a second what she was about to say because Bae Joohyun was on top of her, looking down at her and she looked the prettiest Seungwan had ever seen.

you understood me. - Seungwan said in a small voice.

Joohyun smirked, but it was not her usual one… 

As the minutes passed Seungwan could only be certain of one thing, she didn’t know this Joohyun. This woman was hot, a natural seductress… the way she was looking at her, the touch of her hands, her kisses, her eyes… She knew what she was doing, she knew that she was that good, and the effect she had on people.

Oh my gosh, what is this. - Seungwan whined, not really having other words to express herself, while feeling Joohyun's lips on her neck. 

Her eyes closed tight and opened. Never in her whole life she felt like going over the edge just because of kisses. 

She didn't expect Joohyun to be so good at it, considering that she had done all the kissing since their first one, and initiated every intimate contact they had so far. Her unnie was clearly holding back, because that was child’s play compared to the way Joohyun was kissing her at that moment. 

The fire, the urge, the weakness in her limbs and body... This, she had never felt before. Joohyun was driving her completely crazy and still, she was so, so fine, so light... Her lips, her body, Seungwan felt like giving it all to her.

Joohyun’s eyes, the darkest she had ever seen, like a storm, ready to destroy everything, were watching her attentively. She could read them well… they were questioning her: wasn’t this what you were asking for? keep up. But she had to confess that she was struggling to.  Joohyun then gave her a few seconds to breathe, her lips hovering over hers in a teasing proximity, her eyes locked on hers. 

If I give myself to you like this, will you believe in me, then? Seungwan wondered. She was about to open and give her consent, what else was left to do? 

But Joohyun’s phone rang and the woman answered it, talking in a confident tone of voice with what seemed to be a nurse from the hospital. The situation was really hilarious because Joohyun was currently on top of her ready to devour her whole... she was really out of her mind to tease Joohyun on her work, huh? The woman on top of her put a dominating finger on her lips to keep her quiet, noticing that she was about to laugh. 

Next thing Seungwan saw was her getting up from the bed and putting her hospital gown back on together with her glasses. She stared hard at Seungwan before leaving. Seungwan could tell that she didn’t want to go.

You got lucky... I have to work. - she whispered in a threatening tone of voice, and then left. 

Seungwan held in the crazy giggles that were about to leave well, only letting it out when she was no longer inside the room.

She bited her own bruised lips, while thinking.

Oh my gosh. 

…

She must have dozed off for a few seconds, or maybe hours waiting for Joohyun to come back? Because when she opened her eyes again it was already morning and Joohyun was nowhere to be found inside the room. 

She scratched her head, trying to form coherent thoughts, her hand found her phone and she saw the hour, it was seven am. She really slept, and all by herself.

Where the was Bae Joohyun??

The night before, she couldn’t stop thinking about it… 

It was like a new door was opened in front of her, it was new, intriguing and full of possibilities. She was terrified of things going back to their usual way, and of her unnie pretending it didn’t happen. She didn’t want to go back! She had seen in her eyes how much Joohyun wanted to be with her, she felt her hands, received her kisses and watched her eyes, and those were the indications that she needed. 

Joohyun wanted to be with her… desperately. 

But then she received that phone call and disappeared. Seungwan could only suppose that Joohyun had regretted it and ran from her again. 

Are you running away from me again, unnie? Why?? I thought we were making progress! I am not going back, ok, I don’t care anymore. You are not going to push me away again.

Seungwan never felt so paranoid like that in her whole life… her mind was already coming up with a thousand of situations Joohyun could come up with to dismiss what had happened between them the night before and forming plans to change her mind.

I am going crazy because of you, really… I am a hysterical, crazy person now, because of you. You are driving me crazy! - Seungwan ranted.

Only the thought of Joohyun purposely avoiding her again was enough to make her about to combust. She was not going to stand it anymore.

Oh my god, what am I going to do if she rejects me at some point? I think I will just… - Seungwan continued to rant to herself, while standing up from the bed and gathering the stuff she had brought. 

Somehow she felt like crying.

Her hand went to the door handle and she was about to open the door when someone else did it for her. She was about to apologise, knowing that she shouldn’t be there, since she was not a doctor.

But the words got trapped deep inside , because in front of her was exactly the person she wanted to see.

Bae Joohyun in the flash.

Unnie. - she whispered, longing clear in her voice. Amazing how just the sight of her was enough to calm down her turbulent thoughts.

Joohyun just stood there watching her. She could tell that the woman was relieved by seeing her there. She was wearing surgery scrubs and a cap, giving away her location for all those hours that Seungwan had waited for her. Joohyun wasn’t avoiding her, she was probably performing surgery. 

Seungwan couldn’t help but to feel stupid because of her outburst… 

Going somewhere? - Joohyun asked.

There was something on her voice… It sounded like a treat somehow. 

Also, the clothes were too much… she wasn’t supposed to look that good with an uniforme, it was so unfair.

I-I…

Joohyun gave a step toward her, and she inadvertently gulped. Something in her eyes and posture made her look dangerous.

I was leaving… you were not here. - Seungwan managed to reply.

I told you I had to work. - Joohyun commented, her voice calm… too calm. - I tried to hurry but I couldn't. I thought you had left… I am glad you didn't.

She gave another step and thanks to it they were way too close now.

I am glad I didn't leave either... - Seungwan mumbled, standing frozen in place.

Joohyun was moving slower than normal, it was like she was being careful not to make any drastic movement that could scare her meal off. She got closer, but didn’t touch her, just her lips hovered over hers, almost kissing, like she couldn’t resist it.

I will change clothes. - she murmured. 

ok. - Seungwan whispered, inebriated by her presence.

Wait for me by the exit doors.

Seungwan just nodded.

Where are we going? - she dared to ask. 

Joohyun observed her with those same strange eyes.

My place. - she just said.

And that was enough to leave Seungwan in a trainwreck of emotions. What did that mean? All those weeks that she had been following Joohyun around, not even once the woman had invited her in, she always stood by the door yearning for an invitation that never came.

She was really trying to keep her cool, but it was hard… she was so hopeful that it could mean something, especially considering the way Joohyun was acting.

Please, I just want us to be together. 

So she waited for Joohyun by the exit doors, probably resembling a puppy waiting for its owner, until her unnie eventually showed up. The woman said goodbye to a few nurses and greeted some sunbaes of hers, her expression was warm and amigable, but then she stared at her and it changed immediately…

Her expression hardened, that devious smirk had a comeback, and her eyes, seductively observed her.

Seungwan gulped.

Let’s go, Seungwannie.  - she said.

Seungwan couldn’t help but to smile, not expecting