“So…”  Yugyeom wasn’t even in his bed anymore, he was pacing around his room trying to process the story for all it was worth.  “You’re in love with Mark who is in love with Brian but when Mark was in love with you, you were in love with Jackson who was more in love with his job than anyone else and now… nobody’s in love with you... that’s complicated.”

“Y-yeah.” 

“What happened next?”

“Well, a couple months later I ran into Jackson again-“

“Jackson?! The TRAITOR?”

“Don’t call him that, he was happy to see me.”  Jinyoung got up and pulled Yugyeom by the shoulders so he was sitting on his bed again.  “Jackson had actually published a book and he invited me to the launch party.  He told me he wanted to make amends with anyone he’s ever hurt.”

“Dad, maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.”

“What?”

“Telling me this mystery love story!  What if I don’t like who my real daddy is?”

“Yugyeom, you love your daddy, and you don’t need to wait long to find out who he is because at that very party-“

“It’s Jackson, isn’t it?!”  Yugyeom said, his eyes wet.  “I can’t accept this!”

“Take it easy Yugyeom, it’s just a story.”  Jinyoung pulled Yugyeom into his arms.  “This one has a happy ending.”

“How does it have a happy ending?!  You and my daddy, whoever he is, you’re getting divorced!  What’s the happy in that?”  Yugyeom pulled himself out of Jinyoung’s arms and buried his face in his pillow.

“I think we should stop now.”  Jinyoung said, giving Yugyeom a final pat on the back.  Yugyeom didn’t respond, obviously done with talking to him for the night.

Jinyoung was about to turn off the lights and leave the room when he heard Yugyeom.  “Dad!”

“Hm?”

“I can’t believe you were such an idiot… but I still love you.”

Jinyoung smiled as he turned the lights off.

“Love you too.”

“Why are you still so grumpy?”  Jinyoung took Yugyeom to the park the next day.

“I reviewed all the notes I made yesterday this morning and I still have no idea who my real dad is.”  Yugyeom crossed his arms in defeat as they sat on a bench.

“You know, I wasn’t finished my story yet; we ended when I met up with Jackson-“

Yugyeom covered his ears.  “It’s not him- I figured that out”

“Oh really?”

“He still does the news- I checked this morning.  That guy definitely isn’t dad.”

2001

“Here it is!”  Jackson held up his book to Jinyoung.  “Isn’t it beautiful?”

Jinyoung felt out of place at a much too formal book launch event held at Jackson’s luxurious penthouse.  He wasn’t sure why he decided to show up, since he and Jackson weren’t exactly the best of friends. 

“Amazing, I still can’t believe you managed to write a book.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”  Jackson was only joking about being upset- as he laughed it off moments later.  “I’m really glad you could make it, I actually needed to talk to you.”

“If it’s about anything that happened in the past let’s forget about it.  I came because I wanted to clear the air- are we good?”

“I actually wanted to pull you aside to tell you you’re looking more handsome than ever.”

Jinyoung laughed at that.  “Don’t mess with me Jackson.”

“Right, right… friends?”  Jackson asked.

“Friends.”  Jinyoung held out his hand and they shook on it.

“Actually, the real reason I wanted you to come is that there’s someone here I’d like you to meet.”  Jackson took him by the hand.  “Come with me.”

Jinyoung didn’t know what Jackson was up to only seconds after fixing their friendship but he didn’t trust it one bit. 

“He’s an old friend of mine, but I think you guys would hit it off.”  Jackson pulled him through the party to the balcony.

Jinyoung was a few seconds away from forcing himself out of Jackson’s grip since he wasn’t interested in a relationship at the time- but he stopped dead in his tracks when he saw him.

“Jaebum?”

Jackson tapped him on the shoulder.  “I need to go say hi to more guests, good luck.”  He disappeared back into the party and left them alone.

It had been so many years he almost didn’t believe it was him.  He had aged but his face was still the same Jaebum he knew- his hair short and black.  “You…”

“Me?”  Jaebum may have looked similar but his aura was completely different.  Jinyoung hadn’t ever seen him dressed so formally- he was only into ripped jeans and maybe an untucked dress shirt if he was feeling fancy back in the day.  Today he wore loose trousers and a full suit top.

“What are you doing here, in New York?”

“I live here now, I moved here a couple months ago.  I tried to get in touch with you, but you weren’t picking up your phone… did you change your number?”

Jinyoung still had the same number but there were several reasons as to why he might’ve been ignoring his phone calls a few months ago.  “Sorry, I’ve been meaning to check those calls… I lost your number.”

Jaebum scoffed.  “Sure.”

“No, I’m serious.”  Jinyoung walked closer and leaned against the rails of the balcony closer to Jaebum.  “How did you end up moving here?”

“My company decided to upgrade and relocate.  It was either I move here or lose my job.  I realized I didn’t have many ties back home, so I thought I might as well.” Jaebum took a sip of his drink.  “How’s the acting career?”

“I’m actually working at a publishing company now.”

“Mmm, I think I did see something on the news.” 

Jinyoung sighed.  “Yeah, how’s your career as a musician-break dancer-photographer-film director going?”

“I’m actually in marketing now- I sell cereal.” 

“Ah,” Jinyoung laughed- it wasn’t only his life that hadn’t quite turned out the way he planned.  “Guess we’ve both achieved adulthood bliss?”

“Tell me about it, look at this,” Jaebum pulled his front hair back with his hand.  “I swear I’m going bald.”

“Didn’t I used to tell you that if you kept bleaching your hair this was going to happen?!”

“Yes, you did, and you were right,” Jaebum fixed his hair to it was sitting properly again.  “You were right about a lot of things.”

“I couldn’t have been that on track- both of us ended up in the same place.  Doing jobs we hate and wondering where things went wrong.”

“It’s funny how life pans out,” Jaebum took another sip of his drink and turned so he was directly facing Jinyoung.  “What went wrong between us?”

“You slept with my roommate.”  There was no sugar-coating that one.

“Wow…”  Jaebum held his chest like he was in pain.

“Sorry, I believe it was my plan that chased you away.”

“No, it wasn’t your plan, I was scared.”

“Scared?”  This was the first time Jinyoung was hearing this.

“You had your dreams and I was just… lost.  I felt lost when we broke up… I still feel lost.”

Jinyoung knew exactly what Jaebum was talking about.  “Honestly, I’m feeling a bit lost myself.”

“Really, no plans?”  Jaebum teased.

“Stop.” Jinyoung realized then how much he missed Jaebum. 

“Do you ever think that… maybe we just needed some time?  The two of us?”

Jinyoung was stupid in college and so was Jaebum.  It would be a lie to say they had everything figured out now, but they were in a much better place.  “I’m sorry I lost your number.”

“We can fix that,” Jaebum held out his hand.  “Give me your phone.”

“What are you guys talking about?”  Yugyeom jumped straight into Jinyoung’s lap when he felt breath against his neck and a voice in his ear.

“Ahhh!  You!”  Yugyeom pointed a finger at the man who suddenly appeared behind him.  “You’re JB!”

Jaebum raised an eyebrow at Jinyoung.  “JB?  I haven’t heard that name since I was in college.”

“Dad!”  Yugyeom leaped from Jinyoung’s lap and into his dad’s embrace.  “I’m so glad you’re you!”

“Don’t ask.”  Jinyoung didn’t feel like explaining.

“Hey, dad!  Did you know we learned all about ual in school yesterday?”

“Oh, that’s… nice.”  Jinyoung stifled a laugh when he saw Jaebum’s slightly uncomfortable smile. 

“Jinyoung, can I talk to you for a sec?”  Jaebum put Yugyeom back on the bench and pulled Jinyoung aside so Yugyeom couldn’t hear them.

“Did you receive the papers I sent to your work?” 

“Ah, the divorce papers?”

“Yes, um, I sent them directly to you because they need to be filed soon, but I’m assuming you didn’t sign them yet?”  Jinyoung had shown up empty-handed.

“Sorry, I’ve been flooded with work.”

“It’s only a few signatures, it shouldn’t take that long.”

“I know, it hasn’t even been two days.  Relax.”  Jinyoung wasn’t angry, it wouldn’t take too long to sign the papers.  Something about it felt so final that every time he sat down to try and do it he couldn’t.

“Sorry, I need them by next Wednesday when you drop Yugyeom off again.”  Jaebum reached out an arm then immediately drew back, smoothing down his hair.  “I guess I should go now.”

Jinyoung would never understand what happened over the years.  Things were perfect with Jaebum but after all that time things grew dull.  Timing is everything it seemed like his time with Jaebum was up.  Jinyoung never wanted to say he fell out of love, but they both had to stop running away from the truth.

“Alright… bye.”  Jinyoung had felt entirely awful about the situation for long but after sitting down and recalling his past he felt better.  Still lost, but he knew now there was no way to have your entire life figured out. 

Nobody really knew what they were doing, life was all about finding ways to occupy yourself to forget the fact that you have no idea what you’re doing.  Love comes and goes, people come and go, feelings come and go, nothing was ever concrete and Jinyoung would have to accept that.

Jinyoung was already walking away when he heard Yugyeom.  “Daddy!” He came running over to him.

“What’s wrong?”

“T-thank you for telling me the story.”

“You’re welcome,” Yugyeom looked a bit sad.  “You know, I forgot to tell you the happy ending.”

“What is it?”

Jinyoung smiled.  “You.”

Yugyeom wrapped his arms around Jinyoung tightly.  Jinyoung could feel his shoulder getting wet from Yugyeom’s tears.

“Hey, stop,” Jinyoung pulled Yugyeom away from him so he could see his face and wipe away his tears.  “I love you.”

“Me too.”  Yugyeom sniffed, trying to stop crying.

“Go catch up with your dad.”

Jinyoung didn’t wipe his own eyes until they were both out of sight.