He could not stop thinking about her...the way she looked at him, the sound of her voice even if it were not directed at him; their kisses that seem to ignite something he had kept buried deep inside. He thought himself much immune already; his feelings well contained, numbed from the hurt of his past experience. But it all seemed to come full force after that kiss. While she... she seemed calm and collected, just staring at him with those big luminous eyes. Funny how they always said his eyes were his greatest assest, how he could draw someone in by just a look. Yet he is the one caught and held captive by hers. All the while he felt like he couldn't breathe, his heart in his throat, his pulse a loud drum in his ears drowning out everybody else. The earth can open up and swallow everything around them and he would not spare it a single thought nor glance. He could only see her; everything else fades and blurs, except for her...

He had taken to following her every move, his eyes tracking her yet again, something he had to consciously force himself not to do. She has not changed at all, even after years of separation; and time appears to continue to pass her by. To him she seemed much lovelier, her maturity adding another layer and depth to her character. Her quiet strength, her frailty, her melancholy air--all these tug on his heart yet again.

He would sometimes catch a glimpse of something in her eyes, for those times he would hold her gaze before she looks away. His mind is quick to tell him to be wary, but his heart has always been irrational and stubborn. And she continues to invade every single thought he has while awake. And try as he might, he could no more keep himself away than he could stop himself from breathing.

.

.

[Flashback] 

He watched quietly on the sidelines, while she goes through her filming of the bar scene. His and Jisoo's were completed hours ago and now Bo Young is doing hers, using dummies made up to look like both men. Pd took multiple takes as even the stuffing-filled dummies were bulky and somewhat weighty. They had to get a shot of a proper seamless move when she lifted each "man" over her shoulders effortlessly. Several times, he felt himself move as if wanting to give her a hand, especially whenever her steps faltered or she wobbled with her load. But he stayed out of the camera's way, kept a low key profile, and hoped the bts camera would give them a break by not capturing his presence (but it did). Already their relationship has been the subject of the staff's speculations; it would have been much easier if he had just left and waited for her elsewhere but he couldn't stay away. She draws him like a magnet and he couldn't have withstood being away even if he could help it.

After the last shot was completed, they watched the playback. Her hard efforts paid off as the scene was so perfectly captured, and the dummies were so lifelife making it seem like she was truly carrying both men over her shoulders. She had breathed a sigh of relief; her ankle had started to twinge and she tried not to limp when they left the studio. She knew how he would start fussing at her again and she didn't want him carrying her off to the van in front of everybody. He had become more protective after they came to an understanding. He helped her into her car, while her manager packed her stuff away. He buckled her in, and sighed when he looked around that the crew were still milling about close by. He couldn't kiss her given the circumstance. 

"Put your feet up as soon as you get home. I'll follow as soon as I can," he whispered. "Don't do anything else, just wait for me ok?"

She looked at him guiltily, realizing she could not hide anything from him try as she might. She nodded, touching his cheeks tenderly.

.

She reached home fairly quickly and had tea brewing while she washed up and changed. Hyung Sik had texted that he's on his way and she hurried to get ready. Her sister had gone to see her old friends back home, leaving her with some privacy to spend with him. She heard the doorbell not a minute too soon.

He greeted her with a light kiss and set down an armload of food on the table. "Come, you should be sitting down and resting your feet."

He pulled her down to sit next to him on the floor and propped her foot on several pillows. They ate while they talked about their busy day. Her fatigue seemed to evaporate having him around. He could anticipate her every need and every move, and what woman does not want a man who would coddle her? After they finished, they leaned back on the sofa and she laid resting on his chest, her arms around him hugging him tight while he leisurely ran his fingers through her hair.

"I can't wait for the drama to finish and you can grow back your long hair," he said as he kissed the top of her head. "I've always like your hair long, just like in our Elle pictorial. So beautiful. I couldn't keep my eyes off of you."

"And I thought you find me y in this bob hairstyle," she teased. 

"I do, but I have a weakness for long hair on you." he said as he tugged her hair down to lift her face up to him, letting him reach down for a kiss. Her kisses are intoxicating, and he never needed much prompting when she is always so responsive to his touch. Their kiss always started slow,  building up to a simmer until it catches and they are set ablazed, and for awhile they abandoned themselves to their passion. 

.

"Omo, Bo Young-shi," the set makeup artist said as she dabbed concealer and powder on her face, "your lips are getting chapped. I will need to put more lip balm on you."

"Oh, I'm sorry, I have still have this bad habit of eating my lipsticks off," Bo Young said. She sat on her actor's chair, getting ready while her hair and makeup stylist prepare her for the scene.

"Hmm, you have a little chafed spot on your lower lip. I can cover it with concealer and lipstick but you might ask Hyung Sik-shi to avoid that spot if it gets too tender." 

Bo Young blushed a little at this, but fortunately, the make up artist had turned around already to put her cases away and failed to note her embarrassment.

They have had so much kissing scenes it seems, more than she had experienced in a drama or film before. And each one seems to be more intimate than the last. And Pd has never been one to just film a scene with one take; he's so meticulous about angles and scene, taking shots multiple times to get the effect he wanted. His editing skills are legendary because of this.

At the mention of his name, she looked up to find him across the studio at his corner by the wall, in his usual pose of phone in hand engrossed at whatever it was that seem to holdfast his attention. After much thought over the weekend, she had come to the conclusion she will be patient with him, waiting for such a time he can open his heart to her once more and they can both move past this wall between them. She accepted the truth that she had hurt him, deeply, however noble her intentions were and for that she could not fault him for feeling the way he does about her. As much as she wished for-- if she were to be honest with herself-- a reconciliation, her heart fears that she may be too late. And all she will allow herself to look forward to now is perhaps a friendship again. Wrenching him out of her life before was heartbreaking, but with persistence, she was able to carry on. It helped that their paths never crossed then and his enlistment assisted in burying those feelings well underneath out of reach. And however much she would like to deny it, those shreds of feelings she had for him have never fully left her. He had been her first love, and likely her last. Because this time around, she knew she would not survive another breaking. I will make an effort to be the girl I once was, the girl he once knew. Maybe someday he will learn to forgive me and we can wipe the slate clean and start over again. She spared him one last glance before turning away to prepare herself for their scene.

.

He sat there being unobtrusive, fiddling with his ever present phone. Anyone who knew him would think he was engrossed playing his games again. He has been doing this much lately during downtime, while waiting for the call from the Pd.  It's been his favorite spot; he had placed his chair leaning onto the wall, blocking the way so that no one can pass behind him. Just him in the corner with his phone and everybody has been mindful enough to give him his space, his quiet time. Everyday one would find him sitting there quietly, phone in hand, engrossed.

If anyone could sneak up behind him they would be surprised. He hasn't been playing games at all, nor was he stalking social media sites. Rather he sits there day after day after day, the perfect spot with his phone, where he can zoom in and out finding her face on his screen for his eyes to see, capturing her for him unbeknownst to all. He can watch to his heart's (dis)content; catching her sometimes looking towards him, her expressions tender; and it is by these quiet moments their eyes would meet in the screen that he wished he could just walk over where she is and take her back in his arms, and let everything else be damned. If only it were that easy. But things are never just black and white, he thought. And so he would look again and again in his phone, to find her there.

.

.

"I need the box to be just a little higher for Bo Young-ie," Pd Lee said. "I can't get a good shot of this kiss scene, since Hyung Sik-kie bends too much. I want the box she steps on to add just 5 inches to her height. I don't want to lose the height difference."

Several boxes were brought and tried, and both actors go thru the motions until one such box fitting Pd Lee's requirements was found. They were filming the kiss scene in the bedroom during the unpacking. And from the scene playback, he showed both actors how he wanted them to stand. 

"Are you hurt?" he asked her, while on standby for the scene. 

"What?" she asked in confusion, then jolting in surprise when his hand reached out to rub the side of her lip. 

"I'll try to avoid this if it's tender," mistaking her jump for surprise to one of discomfort.

"It's fine. It doesn't hurt," her hand had moved to touch his wrist, seeming to move it but he held steady, eyes still on . 

They both realized the camera was still on them when they heard Pd whisper, "keep going, do the scene," as he watched them from the video screen.

Hyung Sik bent down to graze her lips gently, and her lashes fluttered close as the kiss he gave her was tender, full of longing. And the camera captured the perfect way her hand grasps his wrist as his fingers tangled themselves in her hair, at the softness in his eyes staring down at her, at their bated breaths long after their lips parted.

.

.

Writer Kim walked over after the scene was done, for which she was thankful for, as it spared her some of the awkwardness of talking with him so soon after that their kiss.

"I wanted to get your input about something but it doesn't have to be right now. You both have plenty of other scenes to finish," she said. She had also turned to Hyung Sik, "you might be tied up filming your scene, so I will get your input separately if need be." 

"Very well, Ms. Kim," Bo Young said. "I'm happy to help. Can you give me an idea what is it about?" 

"Well, Hae In's been extremely popular and there was a clamor to add to his role. We've broached the subject to him, but as you know, he is quite busy and in between projects." 

She continued, "he was not unwilling but it depends on the additional character development we decide. I wanted to get your input here. I'll email you both tentative outline of his character when I get it together so please don't hesitate to share your thoughts."

They both murmured their agreement. 

She lingered a little bit more wanting to talk to him, but the artist was busy touching up his makeup, his hair, his clothes. She saw how the young woman was running her hands all over him, straightening his shirt, reaching underneath his button down to fix his white undershirt. Her brows knotted at this familiarity. She knew she was being unreasonable so she ignored the woman, as she tried to start a conversation with him.

"Have you seen an actual supermoon?" she asked, referring to the next episode they will film. 

"I have when I was in military." The woman started powdering his nose, dabbing gloss on his lips with her finger, then running her hands in his hair to keep it in place. Bo Young had enough distractions.

"Hye Jin-shi, I think we have a little break; would you grab us some coffees, if you don't mind? Here," handing her some money, "grab some for everybody; my treat." 

"You didn't have to do that, but that was generous of you," he said, as they watch her scamper off with colleagues in tow to get the coffees together.

"I know; she was, uh, she was hovering too much and distracting me," was all she said. 

Now that they're alone, standing by themselves, they found themselves at a loss for words yet again. They face outward, looking at the bustling crew.

"Is it really as beautiful as they say? The supermoon, I mean. I don't think I've seen one," she ventured again.

"It is. It fills up the sky and lights it up. It looks like someone hung a giant globe of light in the sky."

"Oh." 

"Odaesan is really a perfect spot to see it," he said. " I doubt we'll be in location. We'll likely film here in the studio again."

"There is snow on the forecast, so maybe that's not too bad." 

"You were never into the cold, much like Mi Yeung."

"Yeah, I don't like the wind blowing when its cold outside."

"You are alike in many ways." 

"You think so? She's quite unafraid, for someone who has never loved before." 

"Maybe because it is for that very reason that she is unafraid."

"And are you... are you much like Jung Hwa?"

"In the past, maybe I was. He is unafraid too," he paused. "He hasn't loved anyone before either. It's easy to be brave when you don't know what heartache is in store for you."

She was quiet for awhile; they looked on and saw the crew gathering around the coffees that were brought over. She nodded to one of the staff who were beckoning for them to join. "I... I think it is much more a sign of bravery, for one to go on and to love, even when one is quite afraid to do so once more."

.

.

.

Someday you will find your way back to me
When you're ready to open your heart again
Then you will see
This love has never truly left
It's just been waiting patiently
For a chance to be with you.
It has never given up hope
It has never wavered from its path
Take a look back, take a step
Maybe then you will see
Someday when you find your way back to me.