Year 2014, December

Junmyeon woke up. He showered and cleaned himself with shampoo. He washed his brown hair and dried it soon after he got out from the bathroom. He looked into the mirror, feeling dejected as he took out a suit that was completely black. He wore it, and combed his hair afterwards. 

After Junmyeon was done preparing, he stepped out of his room. He was about to leave his house for an important occasion. He chomped on a tiny bread and walked out from his house but, he stopped. Junmyeon turned around and unlocked the door to his house. He walked into his bedroom hastily and grabbed the watch that was given by him. He put on the watch steadily, and finally left his house. 

It was snowing but, it was not cold. The roads were covered with white, thick snows and children can be seen building snowmans happily. Junmyeon puffed as he walked slowly on the slippery road. He shoved both his hands into the suit pockets. To be honest, it was actually quite cold for him. If he had a choice, he would stay home instead. 

Bzz....

Junmyeon took out his phone. Kyungsoo was calling him. 

"Hello, Kyungsoo." Junmyeon picked up the call. 

"Good morning hyung. Are you on the way now?" Kyungsoo asked. 

"Ya. I'll be there soon.“ Junmyeon replied briefly and ended the call without giving Kyungsoo any more chances to speak. It's not like he's on bad terms with Kyungsoo, it's just that he didn't have the energy to continue talking. He sighed at the thought, and it was soon interrupted by another phone call. 

Junmyeon lowered his head and saw the name Sehun on the screen. He stared at the screen, his thumb on the standby. That's when he decided not to pick up the call. He ignored it, and shoved his phone back into his pant pocket. The phone stopped ringing but, a message alert buzzed. Junmyeon took out his phone again, feeling a little annoyed. He swiped the screen and read the message received. It was from Sehun. 

Hyung, you are coming to the funeral right? 

Junmyeon shoved his phone back once again. Now that Sehun's text had reminded him. He was going to attend Yifan's funeral.

 

By the time Junmyeon reached, there were already many people grieving for him. He recognised some of the faces and tried to avoid them. His try was in vain when one of Yifan's best friends spotted him. "Junmyeon hyung!" Chanyeol shouted. 

Junmyeon hesitated but, he walked away in the end. He didn't want to see the others. "Junmyeon!" Kyungsoo called. Junmyeon turned around and forced himself to smile. "Thank you for coming." Kyungsoo said. 

Junmyeon smiled and asked, "Why are you thanking me? I think it's only appropriate for me to pay my condolences." He stared at Kyungsoo, noticing that his eyes were puffy. Kyungsoo had been crying and Junmyeon also noticed tear marks on the others. He was the only one who was not crying. 

Kyungsoo got teary again. He huffed and said, "I think Yifan will be very happy because you are here." 

Junmyeon frowned and opened his mouth to say something but, he pushed everything back as he didn't want to sadden Kyungsoo even more. "I brought Yifan's favorite flowers." Junmyeon said and handed Kyungsoo a bouqeut of flowers. Kyungsoo could only thank Junmyeon for that. "I'm going to walk around so, please call me when the burial ceremony is starting." Junmyeon said in which Kyungsoo nodded his head.


Junmyeon regretted. He should've bring a scarf with him. He never once thought that winter could be this cold because he was always warm and fuzzy during winter. He walked around and sat on a bench he stumbled upon. He held his hand out, and caught some snowflakes. Were the snowflakes always this cold? He thought. 

"Hyung." 

Junmyeon looked up and Sehun was standing in front of him. 

"Sehun... you grew taller."  

Sehun frowned. "That's the first thing you are saying to me?" He hissed, implying that he was not happy of Junmyeon's response. Junmyeon laughed and scooted from right to left. He pulled Sehun by the wrist and told him to sit beside him. 

"Hyung, you know that we all missed you right?" Sehun asked. Junmyeon lowered his head, and his gaze softened. He did know that they all missed him, and he missed them as well but, everything just seemed to disappear in a puff of smoke when he came into his mind. 

"I know." Junmyeon exhaled. 

"Then why didn't you show up at the airport that time?" Sehun asked and he started to tear up as memories flushed to him. Junmyeon quickly took out a tissue and wiped the tears away. He looked at Sehun painfully and gritted his teeth. He made Sehun cried again. 

Junmyeon sighed and comforted Sehun, "Sehun-ah, please don't cry... that was not something for you to cry about." He sighed again and said, "We are just not meant to be." 


 

Year 2011, December 

"Gosh, it's chilly today." Junmyeon shivered in cold when he stepped outside from his house. He put his red scarf around his neck and shoved his hands into his coat. His cheeks were red and his eyes were dry due to the coldness of the weather. "Should I give him a call?" Junmyeon mumbled to himself as he fidgetted with his thumbs. 

"Hmm..." Junmyeon hummed as he stared at his phone. "Arghhh just call him, you idiot! Don't be shy!" Junmyeon scolded himself. Just when he was about to press the button, he was greeted by his ringtone. He picked up the call instantly when he saw Yifan's name. He was undeniably happy. 

"Good morning, Myeon." A deep, y voice spoke. 

Junmyeon squealed happily and replied, "Good morning, Yifan." 

Yifan let out a laugh and asked, "How's my cutie boyfriend doing?" Junmyeon blushed and giggled. He was no different from a little girl who was madly in love. It was so obvious of him. "You are not dead right?" Yifan asked. 

"I'm dead because you are too cute." Junmyeon said as he chuckled. 

"Then am I dead too? Because there's a cutie standing in front of me." Yifan laughed. Hearing that, Junmyeon quickly turned around and his face hit Yifan's chest. He wrinkled his nose and looked up. Yifan was smiling at him. Blushing, Junmyeon smiled in return and hugged Yifan in which Yifan hugged back. After a long hug, both of them finally let go of each other. 

"Why are you here though?" Junmyeon asked. 

"Because today is our 4th year anniversary." Yifan answered. 

Junmyeon raised his eyebrows at Yifan and said, "Isn't it tomorrow?" 

"Who cares? I fell in love with you on the day before." Yifan said, and grabbed Junmyeon by his waist. "I've booked a nice place so, let's go." Yifan smiled. Junmyeon blinked and just stared at Yifan because Yifan was overloading with sweetness, which was quite weird of him. 

"I have class today-" Junmyeon said. 

"Just skip it." Yifan interrupted. Junmyeon let out an 'oh' and nodded his head. Yifan smiled and took Junmyeon to his car. Junmyeon exhaled in comfort and set his head comfortably on the headrest. He turned around, and was greeted by a kiss. "Gotcha." Yifan smirked. 

"Yifan, you are awfully sweet today." Junmyeon said, he was still blushing. 

"Am I?" Yifan smiled. Somehow, Junmyeon felt like something bad was going to happen soon but, that thought of his only lasted for a few minutes because he was too immersed in the date with Yifan. 

Junmyeon chuckled. 

"What's wrong?" Yifan asked. 

Junmyeon smiled and said, "I still remember how shy you were when you talked to me." Yifan cringed at his dark past and shook his head. Junmyeon just laughed, thinking back of their first encounter. 

It was also snowing that day, and Junmyeon was performing a choir with a group of children. That was the time when Yifan were head over heels for Junmyeon. He thought that Junmyeon looked like an angel and actually fell for him. By the time Junmyeon had realised, his heart was already with that blushing man on that snowing day. 


Junmyeon enjoyed spending time with Yifan. He had never once thought that his time with Yifan was wasteful. That was how much Junmyeon loved Yifan. "Junmyeon... I have to tell you something." Yifan said. 

"Sure, go ahead." Junmyeon smiled. 

Yifan remained silent. He clenched his hands and bit his lower lip. He lowered his gaze and pulled Junmyeon into an embrace. "What's wrong, Yifan?" Junmyeon asked in a worried tone as he patted Yifan's back gently.

Yifan buried his head on Junmyeon's neck and apologised, "I'm sorry, Junmyeon." 

"Why are you apologising? You did nothing wrong?" Junmyeon asked as he looked at Yifan, puzzled. The last thing he knew was, he wished that he would never hear those words. 

"I'm getting married." Yifan said.

Junmyeon let go of Yifan and looked at him. He laughed and said, "Come on, don't joke with me." 

"I'm going to marry the daughter of CEO Park." Yifan said. 

Junmyeon laughed again. How could he say that with such a serious tone? He thought. "Yifan, you are joking right?" Junmyeon asked. Yifan shook his head and had his gaze fixated on Junmyeon. Junmyeon grabbed Yifan's hand and asked, "Yifan, can't you just laugh it off like usual?" 

"Junmyeon, I..." 

"Is that why you are treating me so sweetly today?" Junmyeon asked. His voice started to tremble as his eyes reddened. 

"Junmyeon listen to me, I-" 

"Please stop, I don't want to hear it." Junmyeon sobbed. 

Yifan inhaled and exhaled, "Junmyeon, I'm sorry." 

 

Year 2012, December 

Junmyeon sobbed loudly and groaned as he tore Yifan's wedding invitation into pieces. "How can he do this to me?" Junmyeon cried as he clutched his pants. He held his hand to his chest, heart aching very much. It was so painful to him that he would cry madly whenever he thought about Yifan. 

Junmyeon ignored every call. He ignored every messages. Why? It was because it was all regarding Yifan's marriage. The content was too painful for him to handle. He would often ask his older brother to delete and clear everything for him because he wouldn't want to catch even a glimpse of it. 



"Yifan, what are you looking at?" A beautiful lady asked. 

Yifan shook his head and forced a smile. "I'm waiting for someone but, it seems like he is not coming." He tidied up his suit and looked into the mirror, checking if his hairstyle was in place or not. He glanced over at the table where a watch was on it. He reached over and took the watch. 

"The watch is nice. Why don't you wear it?" The beautiful lady asked. 

Yifan smiled at her and put on the watch. 

"Is it from him?" 

Yifan nodded his head. 

"I'm so sorry about this, Yifan. If only my dad was not this persistent..." The beautiful lady apologised as she took down her veil angrily. Yifan shook his head, and put the veil back on the beautiful lady. 

The wedding bells were ringing. 


 

Year 2014, December. 

"Hyung, you were wrong!" Sehun stood up and ruffled his hand in frustration. "Kris hyung didn't abandon you!" Sehun raised his volume. Junmyeon was taken aback and he just blinked. 

Junmyeon sighed and said, "Sehun, stop it. It's useless now." 

Sehun teared up once again but this time, he was crying because he was angry at Junmyeon. "Kris hyung never meant to abandon you!" Sehun yelled. 

Junmyeon frowned and said, "Sehun, please stop. We are already over long ago." 

Sehun wiped away his tears furiously and shoved an envelope to Junmyeon. Junmyeon looked at the envelope and asked, "What is this?"

Sehun sniffed and said, "Just read it. It's from Kris hyung." Junmyeon was hesitating but, Sehun done the job for him by opening the envelope for him. "He never meant to abandon you." Sehun left Junmyeon to be alone after throwing him the same words. Junmyeon sighed and took out the letter. 

To Junmyeon, whom I loved the most: 

Hey Junmyeon, how have you been? You must be fine and happy now without an like me right? Truthfully to be told, I'm not fine at all. It was so painful for me everyday and it was hell for me. I really loved you, you know? 

I know. I don't deserve to say this. 
I didn't abandon you. I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. This fake marriage was just to benefit my dad and hers. Both of us agreed to split up after one year and we did. After we divorced, the first thing I did is searching for you. 

Kyungsoo told me that you ignored everything including calls and messages so, I had no choice but to ask Jongin for help because he is your best friend. I told him to pass you a letter and I knew you threw it away soon after you read it. I was at the airport all ready, waiting to start a whole new life with you at other country. I guess I was just too naive. How could I possibly ask for you to start over with me when I'd hurt you so badly before? Even so, I was determined to get you back to my side. 
 

Year 2013, December

"I guess he's not coming again?" Yifan smiled as he stood in front of the airport gate. He looked down at this boarding pass and sighed. Sehun and Chanyeol exchanged glances with each other and lowered their heads. 

Mr Wu Yifan, please board on plane A351 now. I repeat. Please board on plane A351 now. 

"...Are you going to board on the place?" Sehun asked. 

"Of course, I won't. Junmyeon is still waiting for me." Yifan smiled. "Take care of my luggage, will you?" Yifan asked as he handed his luggage to Chanyeol. Chanyeol nodded his head.

"I'm going to run there now." Yifan said. 

"Are you serious?" Sehun asked. 

"Ya. I can't have him waiting for so long." Yifan flashed a smile at Sehun and Chanyeol before sprinting away. Little did they know that, that was the last time to see a smiling Yifan.


Yifan was caught in an accident when he was crossing the road with Junmyeon's favorite flowers. 


I was meant to give this ring to you on that day but, I messed up so badly. I even made you cried. 
I was such a horrible boyfriend, aren't I?
I can't even tell you the truth, I'm such a coward. 

Junmyeon-ah, I knew that this is late of me to say this... but, will you entrust your whole life to me?
Once again? Please? 
We can have as many children as you want :D 


"You should've tell me earlier, idiot." Junmyeon finally cried. Once again, his heart was shattered into pieces. He lost the one he loved before and he had lost him again now. "Why did you leave me alone again?" Junmyeon broke down and sobbed as he gasped convulsively. He held the ring that was in the envelope and clutched it in his fist tightly. 


That time, we always had endless things to talk about. 
We would always notify each other if we stumble across anything interesting. 
Taking beautiful pictures, and sending them to each other. 
Even if it's something small, we would still check each other out. 

However, I never thought that
We would become strangers. 

We were so close but yet so far. 
Everything just disappeared like a puff of smoke.

 

AUTHOR'S NOTES
here's a KrisHo one-shot for you all :D
I'm sorry if this story does not have a happy ending :( It was meant to be sad from the start. 

I hope you enjoy reading it, 
Thanks, vessaliusbez.