UNHEALTHY CRUSHES  

word count:  888 words | pairing: daejae | see author's note

Daehyun's pace never slowed as he rushed towards the fast food chain Youngjae had directed him to in his text, the familiar yellow 'M' coming into view from the end of the mall. He gave his phone a quick glance, and at the lack of response, he broke out into a light jog that only slowed when he caught sight of the younger male exiting with a fallen expression. He took big strides towards the said male, and after one long exchange of stares with the man behind Youngjae, Daehyun embraced the younger in his arms and pressed his lips against Youngjae's. Youngjae's arms s around his waist, pulling him even closer as his lips pressed further into Daehyun's chapped ones.

As happy as he was to be holding the younger in his arms, Daehyun couldn't help but feel the sense of betrayal that rose in him as Youngjae moved his lips against his. Once again, he was just being used as a prop to show Youngjae's exes that he could live fine without them, and once again, he let himself be that prop. He felt a sharp tug in his heart as Youngjae pulled him even closer, softly biting on his lips, and that seemed to have broke Daehyun.

The elder pulled away suddenly, his heart beating wildly into his chest - whether from the kiss or at the sight of Youngjae - as he stared at the man before him, who looked at him in confusion and maybe even shock. Daehyun's hands trembled as he slowly peeled Youngjae's hands away from around his waist, his eyes avoiding the strong gaze on him probing for an answer.

He could still feel Youngjae's gaze on him as he walked away, and the soft sound of his footsteps followed as Daehyun made his way to his car, with only silence enveloping them on the way. Daehyun got into the driver's seat, his fingers wrapped tightly against the steering wheel as he caught his breath. His heart was beating as if he had sprinted a round around the track, and he could feel the dulling ache pressing against his chest as the familiar scent of Youngjae entered his car. 

"Why do you keep doing this to me?" Daehyun's words broke the silence between them, and before the other could reply, he turned to look at Youngjae. Daehyun rested his head against his fingers that were still wrapped around the steering wheel, and he caught Youngjae's eyes while letting out a shaky breath. 

"You know i like you," his hold on the steering wheel became tighter, "but why do you keep using me knowing that i can't say no?" Daehyun could feel a nail dig into his thumb, but it didn't matter, not at that moment. He was doing his best not to cry, it was always the other way round where Youngjae cried and he comforted and he absolutely did not want the younger to see him cry either. 

"I thought you got over me when you dated the other guy." Daehyun could only let out a dry laugh in response as he turned to look out of the window, blinking back the tears that had welled up in his eyes.

"Really?" Daehyun laughed softly as he turned back to look at Youngjae. "Even though i left him during our dates just because you called and needed my help?" He couldn't help it as a tear escaped his eye, which he hurriedly wiped away while averting the younger's gaze. When Youngjae made no move to respond, Daehyun let out a short laugh as he sniffed back his tears.

"I'm sorry, I'll just drive you home." He hated himself for being so weak, he really did.

---

Daehyun pulled up by the entrance of Youngjae's apartment building, unlocking the door in silence as he looked out of his side window. When the younger made no motion to leave, Daehyun finally turned to look at him, only to find Youngjae looking at him apologetically. Sighing, Daehyun unbuckled both their seat belt and as he reached over to open Youngjae's side of the door, the younger stopped him and pulled him in into a kiss.

Daehyun froze in shock, his heartbeat racing at Youngjae's sudden action, his mind barely comprehending whatever it was that was happening. Youngjae, however, did not stop at his lack of response as he pushed the elder back into his seat while he turned his body to face Daehyun's, his arms wrapping around his neck. Daehyun let out a sharp breath as Youngjae's lips travel south down to his chin, placing butterfly kisses along his jaw as his hands finally made its way to hold the younger, a newfound hatred for himself burning in his chest.

"I'm really sorry," his ear heated up as Youngjae rested his chin on his shoulder, his lips brushing against his ear as Youngjae whispered, a shiver running down his spine. Whether he believed the younger or not, Daehyun found himself crashing his lips into the other's as he took the lead between them. His thumb caressed Youngjae's cheek as his lips moved hurriedly against his, and for the first time since Daehyun found out about his feelings for Youngjae, the younger seemed to be as desperate as he is for him.

author's note: i was in a complete rush to finish this since i haven't updated in so long so i hope its fine!