Dinner had been an unusually quiet affair, but not due to any awkwardness. After spending a good two hours in the kitchen preparing dinner, by the time they could dig in, all of them were too hungry to even waste one second of their chewing on talking. It was a comfortable quietness where the only conversation consisted of “Could you pass me that?” or “Anyone else want a bit of this?”.

Solar had to admit that she enjoyed every second of it. She liked the warm and familiar atmosphere that engulfed her in a sense of being at home. Like she had known the others for a life-time. She looked up from her plate to sneak a peek at Moonbyul, who was picking up a chicken drumstick with her chop sticks and placing it in Hwasa’s bowl. “Here, try this. I seasoned it with your favorite red pepper powder.”

“Thanks,” Hwasa said through a half-full mouth, tearing through the meat without hesitation. “Have you tried it with the sauce I mixed? I held back on the spice for you. Didn’t want you to start crying and sniffing in front of Solar in case she hadn’t seen you like that yet because that’s a shocker for another time.”

“Thanks, that really would have ruined whatever cool image I’m trying to portray here,” Moonbyul mumbled into her bowl. “But what about you, don’t you need your taste buds to be on fire to feel anything close to satisfaction? Want me to get the chili flakes so you can adjust the spice in your own bowl?”

“That would be best, thanks.”

And Moonbyul got up to head to the kitchen.

“That was…” Wheein and Solar shared a surprised a look. “Very domestic.”

“We don’t argue all the time,” Hwasa said with a shrug and filled her bowl with more rice. “Usually we understand each other without words. She can be quite soft, you know.”

“Really?” Solar stuck out her bottom lip. “She’s nothing like that with me. Always up to no good.”

Hwasa snorted. “Of course not, she’s in a honeymoon phase with you where she can’t sit still around you. But her and I are just like…an old married couple. No but we get each other.”

Solar and Wheein furrowed their brows, not sure if they liked that comparison.

“What are you guys talking about?” Moonbyul asked curiously when she returned. “Here you go.”

“Thanks.” Hwasa immediately poured a generous amount of chili flakes into her bowl. “We were just talking about our telepathic connection.”

“Oh?” Moonbyul sat down with a chuckle. “It’s not that hard to guess what you’re thinking when all that goes through your mind is food.” 

“See, and this is why we don’t have ,” Hwasa said with an eye roll. “You don’t flatter a girl by reducing her entire character down to one thing.”

“What?” Moonbyul dropped her chopsticks in shock, “Where did this come from? And we don’t have for a wide variety of reasons of which at least two are your es-”

“Never mind,” Solar cut her rambling off with an annoyed eye-roll. “So how did you two become friends? You couldn’t be more different from each other.”

Hwasa and Moonbyul shared a look before pointing to each other and saying at the same time, “She came on to me.”

A pause.

“What?” Moonbyul furrowed her brows. “No, you came on to me.”

“Why would I have come on to you, you were even bonier back then like an underfed chicken except an underfed chicken would’ve had better chances of getting eaten by me than you.”

“What?” Moonbyul spluttered, gesticulating wildly with her hands. “You were sauntering your way up to me, acting all coy and-“

“That’s just how I usually walk-“

“That’s how tigers walk when they have a prey in their sights!” Moonbyul interrupted. “Your gaze was all like “I’m going to eat you up’ and-“

“Don’t make this up, I was giving you a warning stare because I knew those claw hands of yours would just love to make themselves at home in the temple that is my body-“

“Okay, enough,” Solar burst out, using her chopsticks to knock on her glass. “Can you guys at least try to describe how you met as objectively as possible?”

“I believe Hwasa,” Wheein quipped, “she really doesn’t like skinny meat.”

“See?” Hwasa nodded, pleased that her girlfriend was agreeing with her.

“Pft,” Moonbyul grumbled beneath her breath, glaring into her rice bowl.

“So?” Solar expectantly looked at her. “Are you going to tell me how it happened or should I let Hwasa tell that story alone?”

“Fine, fine,” Moonbyul relented and she leaned back in her chair. “We met when we first got assembled into the special ops team. You know, back when we legally assassinated people for the government. We had a briefing and then we were told to warm up to each other as we were going to spend a lot of time together.”

“She took that order literally,” Hwasa said, “all up in my face the second the team leader was out.”

“Don’t exaggerate,” Moonbyul replied with an eye roll. “I literally said, ‘I just wanted to say hi’.”

“That’s what you said when you first met me, too,” Solar said with a frown. “Before being all up in my face.”

“To her defense,” Wheein interrupted, “she didn’t say that to me. Just said, ‘Hey, I just wanted to say you’re really cute’.”

“That’s even worse!”

“How is that even worse?” Moonbyul defensively crossed her arms. “Also, can everyone stop picking on me for a second here. Yes, I wasn’t very creative when I first talked to Solar but that was because the second she looked at me, my mind went blank. I swear I had a lot of cheesier and cringe-worthier lines ready, but when she turned around, I just…” She scratched her neck in embarrassment. “I panicked. She looked at me like ‘What?’ and I didn’t know what to say anymore.”

“Aw,” Wheein cupped her own cheeks and leaned on the table as if she was watching a romantic movie scene.

Hwasa rolled her eyes and just stuffed with more food before she could say something sarcastic that would ruin the moment.

“Really?” Slightly appeased but still skeptic, Solar leaned back in her seat. “You didn’t seem that nervous to me. Still had enough courage to say the greasiest things I’ve ever heard.”

“What can you say, survival instincts kicked in,” Moonbyul gave her a lopsided smile. “I knew I was losing your interest but still wanted to make an impression.”

“You certainly left one,” Solar said. “Never have I been that disgusted.”

“She’s lying,” Wheein stage-whispered to Moonbyul. “She was only slightly disgusted, mostly intrigued.”

“Wheein!” Solar groaned in exasperation.

“Babe, we really need to work on your habit of exposing your friends,” Hwasa remarked, “that could cost us our lives someday.”

“But I can’t stand hearing obvious lies,” Wheein said with a pout. “I mean, at least make it believable, would you?”

“No, Wheein, keep being you, please.” Moonbyul grinned. “I could need all the help I can get to win over this one.” And she fondly gazed at Solar, who quickly turned her face to the side but still felt the intensity of Moonbyul’s eyes on her.

“I’m not a prize to be won over,” Solar said with a huff, trying to remain dignified as she brushed her hair back over her shoulder. “You should be honored that I even bother with you.”

“I am,” Moonbyul replied with an unexpectedly earnest face. “I really feel that way.”

“Oh, gross,” Hwasa mumbled and paused chewing for a second to pull a grimace. “Don’t make my food come back up.”

Wheein had a far less harsh reaction despite feeling somewhat uncomfortable as if she had been intruding on an intimate moment. “Guys, don’t act like you’re the superior couple here when one, it’s obviously me and Hwasa, and two, you’re not even a couple.”

And the word ‘yet’ lingered hauntingly in the air, but no one dared to add it.

Moonbyul sullenly turned her focus back to her food while Solar tried to evade the awkwardness by changing the subject.

“Since you and Hwasa are going so strong, Wheein, when are you planning to introduce her to your mother?”

And Hwasa almost choked on her food, beginning to cough loudly and pounding her chest.  

“It’s not my mom who is the problem,” Wheein crossed her arms and watched Hwasa quickly reaching for a glass of water to flush down the food stuck in . “She would be happy for me if I’m genuinely happy. But a certain coward can’t face her yet.”

“I’m not a coward,” Hwasa said after finally clearing up , coughing a few more times. “It’s just, we have a really busy schedule nowadays with our new business going on-“

“We do?” Moonbyul asked with a raised eyebrow, knowing that she was stabbing a metaphorical knife in Hwasa’s back with her remark, but she would never leave out a chance to get her best friend into trouble the same way Hwasa would seize every moment to mock her.

“Oh, now I wish I had put all the spice in the world into that sauce just so Solar can see your ugly crying face and drop your bony ,” Hwasa reacted angrily to the betrayal.

“My crying face is still handsome and you know it,” Moonbyul shot back.

Hwasa pursed her lips. “Fine, it really is and I’m getting mad just thinking about it. But your snot is still gross and maybe that will make Solar think twice about committing herself to someone whose nose is too perfectly shaped to criticize and yet produces so much slime.”

“If she can’t handle me at my worst, then she won’t be able to handle me in a less bad state.”

“I don’t think that’s how it goes,” Wheein commented with a furrowed brow. “Wait, that’s not even the point here. What were we even talking about before I got caught up in your fight?”

Solar rubbed her forehead, feeling a vein about to pop from stress. “You were about to get angry at Hwasa for not wanting to visit your mother.”

“Right,” Wheein nodded now that she remembered. Her expression turned strict as she faced Hwasa. “I don’t understand what you’re so afraid of, my mom would love you if she could see how happy you made me.”

“Her mother is really kind,” Solar added in agreement.

“See? Nothing to fear.”

“Except I don’t exactly have the kind of job history that a mother would want for her child’s partner,” Hwasa mumbled.

“Well, I’m all for you being honest, but I didn’t mean that honest. I thought it was sort of obvious that you were going to leave your murdery past out of your self-introduction whenever you meet someone from my life.”

“I know, but what if I slip up because I’m nervous?” Hwasa fidgeted with her fingers. “I still have the basic instincts of an assassin. Just ask Moonbyul, whose teeth I almost knocked out once because she woke me up during a nap.”

“Pretty sure you were awake at the time and just annoyed because I was standing between you and the TV,” Moonbyul remarked drily.

“Anyway, I’m not fit to completely merge into society yet. Hell, I’ve never been what mainstream society wanted to see.”

“And that’s okay because it doesn’t matter,” Wheein said with a warm smile, laying a comforting hand on top of Hwasa’s. “My mom can feel if you’re a good person. And she trusts my judgment. And that’s enough for her. She’s not that bothered about what society thinks ever since she’s been shunned by it for raising me on her own.”

“Oh,” Hwasa breathed, “I didn’t know that. I’m sorry.”

“Nothing to be sorry for,” Wheein said, shaking her head. “I didn’t lack any love growing up.”

Moonbyul quietly looked at Solar as if seeking for confirmation whether Wheein was telling the truth and when Solar subtly nodded, Moonbyul smiled in relief. “Then you’ll match with Hwasa. Her dad literally sees her as his whole world and still thinks she’s a princess. Together, you’ll have the perfect parents.”

“Really?” Wheein asked and Hwasa nodded in slight embarrassment, adding, “It’s more of a stable, mutually understanding father-daughter relationship, nothing overly cheesy.”

“Still so much better at expressing it than my old man,” Moonbyul said with a sigh. “Who the hell decided that fathers have to be stoic machines who only play with you til you’re eight and then proceed to only be relevant in your life when your mom doesn’t agree to buy you something or you need a jar opened that you have already spent ten minutes loosening up before he easily opened it in a second.”

Short silence followed in which Solar and Wheein looked at Hwasa with a questioning gaze along the lines of, ‘Father issues?’ and Hwasa solemnly nodded.

“I don’t have father issues,” Moonbyul burst out as if she had sensed the silent conversation between the other three at the table. “I’m just annoyed that society had robbed him of his emotions. He should have been allowed to cry when I was born, I don’t care whether it was from happiness or disappointment. Probably the latter if he knew what I was going to become.”

“Well,” Solar began, “your father will get along with mine then. I never really know what he’s thinking either, occasionally he provides an opinion whenever my mother nags him to because she’s complaining about my life-style and needs someone to back her up.”

“Let me guess, she’s asking when you’re going to get a boyfriend?” Moonbyul said sympathetically.

Solar just sighed and nodded.

“You’re not out to your parents?” Hwasa asked.

“I mean, I hinted at it a couple of times,” Solar answered with a shrug. “But they sort of ignored it. We’ve been dancing around that topic ever since.”

“What kind of hints are we talking about?” Hwasa probed further. “Because let me tell you, saying you like button-down flannel shirts is not a hint, it’s fashion.”

“I was more direct than that,” Solar defended herself. “Also, true.”

“She said she wasn’t interested in men right now, so her parents thought she was putting her career before a relationship,” Wheein elaborated, eager to share the frustration she felt over her friend’s situation.

“Classic,” Moonbyul nodded knowingly. “Do they also worry about you not getting married by thirty and becoming some undesirable hag?”

“They’re Asian, of course they do.”

“Well, then,” Moonbyul raised her glass, “cheers to all the times we lied to our parents to save them from a heart attack.”

The others followed without a second’s delay.

“Cheers.”

--

Wheein was busy closing up her art gallery when she heard the front door open and a person coming inside.

“I’m sorry, but the exhibition’s closed for today,” she called over her shoulder before turning around and blinking in surprise. “Moonbyul?”

“Hey,” the other woman sheepishly smiled and waved her hand. “Sorry to barge in like that, but I really just wanted to talk to you alone. About Solar.”

“Oh,” Wheein slowly let out. She could imagine what this was about. “Sure, let’s talk. And maybe you could give me a hand while we’re at it.”

“Of course, it’s the least I can do,” Moonbyul quickly agreed. “What can I do?”

“Just a slight adjustment to the position of the paintings. Could you please take that one down for me?” Wheein gestured to a large square painting on the wall next to her. “I want to switch this one with the other one at the entrance.”

“Can do.” Moonbyul stepped on her toes to reach the frame and carefully dislodged it from its place holders. “’Discrepancy In Expectations’. That’s an interesting title. Is it referring to the fact that I’m probably expecting it to have a deep meaning when it’s just something you randomly came up with at 3 am after too much coffee?”

“Wow, you’re getting good at this,” Wheein said, impressed. “And you told me you don’t understand art.”

“I don’t,” Moonbyul mumbled as she moved the painting. “Honestly, I don’t think art is made to be understood. But what do I know, I’m just a mere mortal who finds satisfaction in the simple things like booze and s.”

“Spoken like a true connoisseur,” Wheein chuckled. “Anyway, you didn’t come here to understand art. You want to understand Solar better.”

“Actually, I think I understand her pretty well by now,” Moonbyul replied. “It’s not like she hides her emotions. I’m here because I need an idea on how to convince her that I’m in it for a long ride. Or for an eternal ride even. Hm, that sounded unsettling, but you know what I mean.”

Wheein hummed in thought while looking at Moonbyul before she snapped her fingers in delight. “Yes, that could work!”

“You got an idea?” Moonbyul asked hopefully.

“Yes, the two paintings behind you need to switch places. That will mix up things a little.” Wheein gestured to her work. “I’m sorry, I was distracted. You were saying?”

Deflated, Moonbyul let herself plop down on a nearby stool. “Am I not interesting enough for a relationship?”

“Oh, no that’s not it,” Wheein dismissively waved with her hand, “your life is plenty interesting, trust me. It’s just, Solar has some trust issues. A couple of bad experiences with past friends and lovers. You know, when she opens her heart to something, she’s in it one hundred percent. She never does things half-heartedly, I don’t need to tell you how passionate she can get about the things she likes. And such ambitious and determined people like her don’t like uncertainties.”

“So you’re saying I’m still an uncertainty?” Moonbyul said dejectedly.

“Not like that,” Wheein quickly added. “I mean, we know you turned your life upside down for her. You were willing to make a big change for her and that proves how serious you are. But it doesn’t make your past go away. Especially your romantic past or shall I say very unromantic past given the duration of your relationships, if they can even be called that.”

Moonbyul pressed her lips together. “It’s not what it looked like.”

“Oldest lie in the history books,” Wheein said with a shrug. “Apart from the ‘I’m not going to invade your country’.”

“It really wasn’t like that,” Moonbyul said with her voice lowered. “Yes, sometimes Hwasa and I brag about the adventures we had, but they were less spectacular than we made believe.”

“I’m listening.”

“It was more like a…cat and mouse game. But the cat never got to eat the mouse if you get what I mean.”

“I’m not six and live in a village without internet. Continue.”

“Now, I don’t know how to say this without sounding too full of myself because let’s face it, I’m awesome, but Hwasa and I, we were kind of popular. Something about being the best paid and most wanted assassins really hits the spot with women of the criminal underworld.”

“Disturbing. Go on.”

“So we were kind of trophies for them. They just liked having us around them. We flirted and fed their egos, but we had no relationship with them. It was just really all for show, we needed the connections they had and they liked our attention.” Moonbyul paused before adding, “Though their husbands didn’t.”

Wheein wasn’t sure how she was supposed to feel about it. She wasn’t an uptight person regarding ual history, but things always looked different when it concerned your own lover. “So can you absolutely tell me for certain that you two had no with any of them?”

“Well…” Moonbyul scratched her neck. “Almost certain to have had no with most of them?”

“…”

Wheein pulled her keys out of her pocket and gestured for Moonbyul to get up from her stool. “I’m closing up, I really need to leave and lie down and maybe run Hwasa over with a car I don’t own and don’t have a license for yet, but that’s nothing I can’t arrange within a day because I’m sort of rich and also have Hwasa’s bank account pin.”

“That’s fair, but please consider that we left our past behind for you two because we really like you.” Moonbyul stood up. “We would kill for you. No, that was badly phrased, pardon me. Uhm, we would die for you? No, maybe not use any words associated to death…why is this even considered romantic by anyone?”

“Just move,” Wheein impatiently said. “By the way, you were sitting on a 100,000 dollar art installation and I’m expecting you to buy it after you’ve desecrated it.”

“What? That thing?” Moonbyul turned to the rusty stool and sure enough, it had a small description plaque at the bottom. “What the hell-“

“I also accept check and restaurant coupons, thanks,” Wheein called over her shoulder as she opened the door and stepped outside the gallery, waiting for Moonbyul to follow up. “Now come on, I don’t have all day. Hwasa’s waiting for me to get home so I can beat her up. Except she doesn’t know that yet.”

“Scary,” Moonbyul mumbled as she exited the gallery and waited for Wheein to lock the doors. “Never trust a cute face…”

“Don’t think I won’t tell Solar about this.”

“Please don’t?” Moonbyul immediately pleaded in panic. “I’m already coming up short of good reasons to date me, I don’t need any more counter arguments. I promise I’ll make Hwasa buy whatever you want if you keep this between us.”

“She already does that,” Wheein answered with a hint of pride. “And fine, it’s not my place to tell her your past. But you need to do that yourself eventually. I know not everything from the past needs to be explained or even brought up, but if it concerns your future relationship, you might want to start being honest. Just saying.”

“Urgh, hate it when I get reasonable advice that I already know I can’t follow,” Moonbyul rubbed her eyes. “But I’ll try this time. For real. I really want to be with her.”

“You better,” Wheein said in a warning tone. “She’s like my older sister that I look up to until I remember that she can’t even cut a fruit without endangering anything within a mile radius. But still, she’s family. And if you hurt my family – “

“I know, you’ll make me regret it.”

“No, I will cry first and then make Hwasa make you regret it.”

Moonbyul blinked. “That’s fair."

"Okay, don't say I didn't warn you. Bye!"

"Bye."

Amused, Moonbyul watched Wheein marching off.

Though she hadn’t exactly gotten the kind of help she had been hoping for, this visit hadn’t been for nothing. It was comforting to know that Solar had a friend like Wheein to turn to if things ever got rough. And Moonbyul was determined to somehow get herself on that list of reliable people for Solar, no matter as a friend or more, as long as she could protect her.

…

“I feel like she would love romantic clichés,” Hwasa said as she made herself comfortable on the couch with a bag of snacks. “Maybe a trail of rose petals and candles leading to the bedroom or something equally tedious to clean up after.”

“Rejected. Maybe in another life, if I was like eighteen and dumb,” Moonbyul replied as she recklessly paced around the living room.

“As if you weren’t dumb now,” Hwasa snorted, pouring chips into until she could hardly close it. “Jwush gwiwe uh a wing o shumthng.”

Moonbyul stopped dead in her tracks. “I’m not going to give her a ring, that’s going too fast.”

“Jush a giff, ‘nt pruhposhal.”

“I don’t know, it’s weird giving a ring to someone you sleep with as a gift and nothing more…”

Hwasa just rolled her eyes and gave herself time to chew down on the food before she spoke up again. “Only if you make it weird. Anyway, since none of my advice is good enough for you, why don’t you ask around her friends?”

“Already asked Wheein, didn’t gain much aside from more respect for her.” Moonbyul looked to Hwasa. “Your girlfriend’s amazing. Do you think –“

“Don’t make me hit you,” Hwasa threateningly glared at her.

“What, you don’t even know what I was going to say!”

“No, but I already don’t like it. Whatever you were going to ask, forget about it.”

Moonbyul let out a long sigh. “Can’t say I couldn’t predict this outcome. I mean, I was going to ask something inappropriate, but you could’ve given me the benefit of the doubt and let me finish.”

“I only did you a favor because if I had let you finish, god knows what I would have done. I saved myself from getting offended and you saved yourself from an beating.”

“Tch, you say that like I am some ert who would have requested a or something,” Moonbyul grunted, “when all I wanted to do was respectfully ask about the possibility she’ll break up with you for me if Solar and I don’t work out.”

Hwasa slowly put her snacks aside. “Care to repeat that?”

Moonbyul took a small step back. “Aw, come on, you know I was just messing with you.”

“Some things cannot be messed with.”

“Don’t…don’t come closer, you haven’t washed your hands yet and you know I hate it when your fingers are all sticky with crumbs - AAAHH MY FIVE THOUSAND DOLLAR SUIT, NOO!”

--

Solar couldn’t remember why she even chose her job in the first place. The hours were terrible, the stress constant, her social life almost non-existent. Only the pay was good, but it had taken her years until it reached a level where she didn’t have to worry about scratching enough coins together for rent. By the time she could comfortably spend her hard-earned money, she was almost thirty and she hadn’t experienced anything exciting in life.

That was, of course, until Moonbyul came along. Who possibly brought along too much excitement for her liking.

But that wasn’t the main issue right now. Solar didn’t think she ever dreamed about being a doctor. It just sort of happened. Her grades were excellent in school, she had the discipline and ambition to power through the hardest lessons and she didn’t know the words ‘giving up’ or ‘taking it slow’. Naturally, her parents thought that her talent would be wasted on any profession other than a prestigious and money-making one, so they nagged her to consider it until she gave in.

Come to think of it, had she ever had a dream of her own? What did her past-self wish to become?

“You should’ve become a celebrity,” was what once Moonbyul casually remarked at a dinner date, “you’re way too entertaining to watch, I think I just saw about every human emotion on your face in the last ten seconds.”

This had been her response to seeing Solar attempt to eat a frog leg, which had been a rollercoaster of emotions and expressions for her.

It made her remember that she did once have a dream about becoming a singer. But then had to dismiss it because she would’ve had to carry on without her parents’ support and no secure income, as well as no guarantee to ever make it beyond a promising rookie.

“It’s not too late,” Moonbyul had instantly replied when Solar had shyly confessed her past dream during a midnight stroll through a park, “your face looks as fresh as twenty and if you decide to put out an album, I’ll buy 100,000 of them to boost your fame.”

“You can’t just manipulate your way to success.”

“Sure can, that’s what everyone with money does. I’ll just pay off some foreign server farms who host thousands of bots that will stream your songs and videos on an endless loop, with their IP addresses switching after each stream. That’ll secure you a top ten spot, the rest is up to you. Of course, some people get greedy and hire more bots to directly push for that number one spot, but we won’t need that. Your voice is enough.”

Solar remembered Moonbyul’s serious look as she began rambling about all the necessary steps to boost Solar’s singing career, sounding far more excited and invested in it than Solar, who had been just bringing it up as a funny memory and nothing more. But seeing Moonbyul like that, with all that passion in her eyes for something that didn’t even concern herself, it made Solar believe that even her most impossible dreams would come true if Moonbyul was supporting her.

Solar really appreciated Moonbyul’s straightforwardness and childish approach to things. Even the most complicated matters didn’t seem that complex anymore with her.

Maybe she should say yes the next time Moonbyul asked her to become her girlfriend. Because after all, she had never been a good liar.