Step 1: Leaving the safety of your house. 

Just don't do it. 98% of awkward social situations with strangers happen outside of your house.

8:45am     

“So let me get this straight” Hoseok asks slowly trying to process the information. “You told her bellybutton was cute, panicked after realizing what you had said, then ran away?” he finishes bewildered expression gracing his face.

“Well technically we still aren’t sure if she really is a she” Taehyung supplies, “Yoongi said her voice was pretty deep, plus Jimin and I are almost positive that it was a cute freshman boy who moved into dorm 213 last week”

“Yeah, Tae was staring holes into the poor kid’s soul” Jimin snickers.

“You would be too if you saw those arms, all sweaty from moving furniture and-“

“That’s enough, we get it” Yoongi says exasperatedly, face flushed from embarrassment, still slightly traumatized by the earlier events.

He hadn’t meant to embarrass himself. He never really means to. All he wanted to do was simply smile and maybe greet the goddess down the hall with a pleasant ‘Good Morning’ and walk away coolly. Things however didn’t go according to his plan. When do they ever?

..........

7:25am

It’s mornings like these where he regretted his decision of putting his alarm clock in the opposite side of his messy dorm-room, the loud notes of “I’m Saying” by Lee Hongki blasted off the walls of the cramped space. In any other circumstance the twenty-two year old would happily sing along, when he was perfectly comfortable in his make-shift nest of warm blankets and pillows, now was not the time or place.

Groaning in defeat the pale boy rolled off the bed onto the fraying pink rug (a moving in present from Seokjin, of course). Yoongi would never admit he actually enjoys the fluffy pink addition to his otherwise dull room; he’d rather not have the entirety of his living space looking like fairy vomit.

He hadn’t been this tired since that one time he had spent twenty-six hours on that project he had neglected to do in freshmen year.  Sleep is extremely valuable to Min Yoongi (more so than his idiot friends, who just so happen to be the reason to his lack of beauty sleep.)

Sluggishly the black-haired male got up and trudged his way to his bathroom, eyes squinted, as the harsh artificial light entered his vision. He grabbed his toothbrush and stuck it in his mouth after applying a thick layer of toothpaste, only to aggressively spit it out seconds later. The exhausted boy realized two-seconds too late that he had squeezed a glob of hand cream on to  his bright yellow toothbrush rather than toothpaste, the bitter, greasy taste lingering in his small mouth.

Mornings just didn’t like him.

This fact proven once again, when less than five minutes later, the boy accidentally mistakes hairspray for his spray on deodorant. The warm shower he had taken afterwards definitely not helping with his current too-tired-to-function dilemma.

Miraculously Yoongi was able to leave for class in one piece, only slightly harmed during the process (the artificial flower taste of the hand cream still lingering on his tongue).

He closed the door to his dorm and made sure to lock it before he left, when suddenly the sound of the door two rooms down catches his