We were sitting on a park bench eating our ice cream. We weren't talking just sitting there, it felt nice and kinda weird, Hoseok was always the one who talks a lot or well.. screams.
“So forgetting about Tae, what have you been doing?”- I’m really not good at all this talking, so understand that I’m really trying here.
“Haha, It's funny to see you trying to be sociable. Well I finished high school, I started going to a dance academy, to support myself I also work at a flower shop and by now I can make a pretty decent bouquet and I’m also in an underground dance group and sometimes we perform, that’s about it. What about you?” I really didn't want him to ask me that, what am supposed to say, that I don't go to school, that I don't have a job and that I’m living at Namjoons as a freeloader. I’m not saying that.
“Oh nothing, just living. So do you still hangout with Namjoon?”- He is my only key of escape right now.
“Not really, I wish I was, I only see him sometimes if we perform the same night at the same place which is rare, we’re both really busy so we kinda drifted apart.”- Yeah he’s busy with his boyfriend. “Yoongi are you ok, you seem a bit uneasy?”- That’s because I don’t know how to talk to you and the silence is getting uncomfortable.
“I ate my ice cream too early and now I’m hungry again.”- I hope he found that funny because I didn't. He did, he’s laughing.
“Well do you wanna go and get some pizza, because I could really use some too right now?”- It’s a good thing he’s not a too serious person.
“Yeah, let’s go.”- If this was a date we probably won't be going out again after this, but it’s not, I guess I really missed him being this happy to be with him, we should definitely go out again, but how am I going to ask that?


We had a little chat at the pizza place, just catching up more and it ended with exchanging numbers and agreeing to meet up again. I came back to the apartment and everyone was asleep, which wasn't a surprise because it was 12:30am. Today is the first time I actually went out, and it was so damn worth it. It's true that Hoseok had a crush on Taehyung, but I had a crush on Hoseok, well it wasn't really a crush, I was just really fond of him, at the time being gay didn't even cross my mind. Now I can’t show myself like this to him again, I have to fix myself. Tomorrow I’m gonna look for a job and definitely avoid flower shops just in case, wouldn't want to bump into him while looking for a job.