It was a long and tiring day. Jessica was halfway getting ready to bed now. She heard her phone rang a few times. It was from an unknown number. Usually, she won't pick it up but today she felt a strange string in her heart that asked her to answer the call. 

J: Hello

Y: …

J: Hello? Who’s this?

Y: … Jessica

J: Again, who’s this?

Y: It’s me. Yuri. It’s been a while. 

J: … 

Jessica sure was shocked right now. She can’t believe her own ears. Somehow, mixed feelings of hate, annoyed and anger made their ways up her heart. 

Y: Sica…

J: What do you want

Y: Can we meet?

J: I don’t want to.

Y: Please, Sica

J: No, just tell me what do you want

Y: Can we at least talk?

She didn't want to talk to her, not today, not right now. 

J: … … Okay, spill it

Y: How are you?

J: It never occurred to me that you care. Why ask now. 

As usual, she was great at being sarcastic. 

Y: …

J: Sigh. Yuri, I’m not as free as you imagine me to be. Can you just spill the tea now? Why do you call me at this late hour? From what I remember, we are not on speaking terms.

Y: Happy 13th anniversary, Sica. 

She said it like a whisper, but loud enough for Jessica to hear it. 

Again, Jessica can’t believe what she heard the second time that day. 

Yuri waited for her reply, but received none. She can hear Jessica’s laugh after a moment of silence.

Y: Sica? 

J: For real? Are you kidding me?!?!

Y: I am. You debuted on this day 13 years ago. With us. 

J: There’s no “us” Yuri. Everything ended on that day. 

The tears that Yuri had been holding since she heard Jessica’s voice fell from her eyes.

Y: I’m sorry. I’m sorry Sica, for what happened.

J: It’s been 6 years. 6 fcking long years. Don’t you think it’s a little too late for this?

Y: We were young Sica.

J: Being young is not a good excuse for this Yuri, for what you all did. You girls fcking kicked me out. Out from my own group, my career, my dream, ignoring the fact that I had spent my entire childhood and teenager time to reach that far.

Y: It was the best for the group. At least that was what we were told, what we thought how it would be at that time. We never knew it would turn out this way.

J: The best? Don’t be ridiculous. I don’t see how it would be the best for the group.

Y: Let’s be honest here Sica. We all knew it, that you weren’t focusing on the group anymore.

J: What the fck are you talking about? Didn’t I attend all the group’s event and schedule.

Y: Public event Sica. Public events and official schedules. You appeared only an hour or two before it then disappeared right after that. You didn’t show up to the practice, didn’t attend the meeting. We understood that you just started your own brand and you need to put in your best to grow it. It was your dream, and the girls and me supported you, wholeheartedly. We would never try to stop you from achieving your dreams, but not to the extent that you missed our practices, our meetings. You can’t neglect your part in the group, we were a group, a group together Sica. We needed teamwork, we needed communication between each other, we needed you, we needed you to give your all to the group in order to succeed, to achieve the same goals, together. We were at our peak of our career, we just renewed our contracts with the company, we could be so much more. But it was clear to us that you weren’t there with us. So we thought it was best to let you go, for your dream.

J: What’s the point of this conversation now? The past is in the past Yuri and there’s no point to talk about this again.

Y: I know. I know Sica, I just thought maybe we all needed this, to talk about it at least once.

J: No! You should talk about this the day you all made that fcking decision without my consent. This all happened because you girls were assuming things, you girls just assumed that I can’t handle both sides well, that I’m incapable of doing so.

Y: I told you we were young. We don’t know how to handle it the best way and everything became a mess when the company got involved, when you heard it from a third party and not from us.

J: Still, it doesn’t change the fact that I would be kicked out from the group. You have no idea all the hardship that I had gone through, I had to start from zero again. Everything that I had worked my off for was gone. I was being banned from the whole Korea entertainment industry because of your stupid company. I can’t go on TV shows. I can only go on some Chinese shows that the company definitely won’t arrange for the group before. All the struggles and it was like I had to re-debut again and attend as much show as possible. And you had no idea how hard it was, and it hurts Yuri.

Y: Sica, you are not the only one getting hurt from this. We all are, you, me and the girls. The way you wrote your message, it was cleared that you were being ganged up and kicked out of your own group. Do you know how this affects the group? It brought the whole group down, the image and even the fandom split into two. We became the selfish and ignorant es to the public, to your fans. But we never say anything, did we? The company could simply come out with a statement to put all the blame on you but we stopped them. We chose to stay quiet on this because we knew we had hurt you enough, and we don’t want to hurt you any more than this.

J: What are you trying to say now?

Y: What I’m trying to say now is, it brought negative impacts to both sides, because of the way we handled things, because we just assumed things. And it’s enough, we should stop hurting each other.

J: After 6 years? 

Y: Yes. I admit that we were wrong, I was wrong, we should have more faith in you and I’m sorry for not doing so. 

Jessica can't believe that Yuri was actually apologising now, after all these years. 

Yuri knew Jessica was mad due to her tone of speaking and she was probably on the verge of crying.

Y: Sica, I really treasure our group, our members and that included you. It’s something that I hold dear to my heart. I know it’s late now, it’s 6 years late. We should have had this talk long ago. But can’t you see that I called today to patch things up? Even though you are mad now but I’m sure you know I’m being sincere now.

Jessica doesn't like to think about the past but everything that happened in the past went through her mind like a movie. Of course Jessica loved her group, her members. They had worked so hard together since the beginning, from pre-debut, to debut, to being hated, the black ocean, to climbing halfway to the top, to actually being at the top, to being the National's girl group of the country. They shared the same memories and these memories were precious to her. But after that eventful day, she was blinded by the feeling of betrayer, anger, hate and hurt that she totally blocked the girls out. 

After a long moment of silence, Jessica just sighed. 

J: Yul, we have hurt each other enough to go back now.

Y: Yea, I agree. It's impossible to go back anymore. But…

J: But?

Y: I miss you. I miss our old times together. I miss us. I miss you, Jessica. 

There, Yuri finally said it. 

It had such a huge impact on Jessica that it broke through the wall that she put in between her and the girls. She knew Yuri was being sincere and she actually appreciated her effort to take this one step nearer to her. She knew it's no point being defensive and her ice princess self now. 

J: I miss you too, Yul. 

Y: Thank you, Sica. Somehow things just happened without our control, in the wrong way, at the wrong timing. If it hadn't, I guess we would be celebrating our 13th Anniversary now, together. 

And Jessica won't be celebrating it all by herself. She just hummed in response. 

Y: I know you have your new life now, new social circle, new friends, with your family by your side. And I know you don't need this, but I just wanna say that I'm here. If you need someone, I'll be there too. 

J: mmmm…

Y: I know it's too late now to say this but I just wanna get it out of my mind. You'll always be one of the people that is important and dear to my heart. 

J: Yul, are you drunk? 

Y: Nope, I'm not. In fact, my mind had never been this sound and clear before. 

They both didn't say anything because they both knew it was enough. The call today was enough. Although it didn't magically mend all the broken hearts and souls but it was working its way on it. 

J: Do you have anything else to say? 

Y: No, I think I've said enough for today. 

J: Alright 

Y: mmm

J: Goodbye, Yuri. 

Y: Goodbye, Jessica. 

The call ended. And Jessica finally let her tears fall from her eyes. 

Author's note:

No one knows what happened back then, this is just me being delusional. I don't like to write stories based on the real world, because we all like the fictional world. I love OT9 so much that it actually hurts to look back. And somehow we all knew that it's almost impossible for OT9 again although we all are holding on that tiny little hope. Because the closer you are, the deeper it hurts and the harder it is to patch things up. Someone has to be the one to take the first step. Let's just hold on to that tiny hope for now. Who knows we might be able to see that one day. 

Anyway, thank you for reading.