[CHAPTER 25]

"Second Life"

"What do you mean Cha Hakyeon died?" Wonshik asked.

"It's exactly like what it means," InGuk told him.

"Are you saying he got reincarnated or something?" 

"No. He's still the same Cha Hakyeon but he was given a second chance in life. Or gave himself a second chance in life to be exact."

"Huh?"

"I was just as surprised when I first realized that the book Hongbin went into was Cha Hakyeon's. When I first saw the book after it was confiscated, even I got quite the shock. I never thought that something like this would be possible..." 

Hakyeon was supposed to have died. 

~

His life should have ended that one summer day as he was reminiscing about his past.

After losing Taekwoon, he really had nowhere to go. Home reminded him of his lover and he had no motivation to continue with his studies either. He took a temporary withdrawal from university for a semester because he wasn't able to focus on anything at the time. He cried and cried, day after day. At that time, Hakyeon had no one by his side, even Sanghyuk was too young to be able to give him any warm advice. Maybe that's why, Hakyeon sunk in further into depression as he endured the pain all alone. He shut himself at home, refused to go anywhere and lived like a dead person. He knew that Taekwoon worked really hard for him to get a teacher's diploma but still, Hakyeon didn't have the will to continue.

"What's the point?" Hakyeon asked himself. "There's no one who could celebrate it with me anyways.... even you left me."

He held onto the picture he held so dearly of him and Taekwoon at the coast of Jeju island. It was a precious memory for him but it was only a memory that would not happen anymore.

That's why, he decided to do the most foolish thing ever.

Ending his own life.

At least, that's what he wanted to do.

He's tried all methods of suicide. He tried hanging himself in his apartment but the rope would cut off and his attempts would fail. He's tried cutting himself so that he would die of blood lost but that didn't work either. He's even tried running in front of a car in hopes of getting hit so that he could end his life once and for all. 

That's why, he couldn't feel pain. He's tried all methods of ending his life yet something held him back. Eventually, his body started to accept the pain and he became numb to it. He wasn't even conscious about it himself, because the physical pain didn't hurt as much as what he felt inside.  

Every method that he's attempted were recorded in his story. It was all in the books for those who have read it to know about including Hongbin and his friends. They all knew but they would never dare to mention it. But what wasn't written in the book was that there was actually one method that truly killed Cha Hakyeon.

During the second summer since Taekwoon passed away, Hakyeon went to Jeju island in which he once went on a vacation with Taekwoon before. He went there with Taekwoon after they have left his hometown in order to think about their future together. The two of them were looking for a place where no one would know about them so that they could leave everything behind and start fresh. Hakyeon was really happy at the time to be venturing out somewhere so beautiful and peaceful with the person he loves the most.

He walked along the shores of Jeju island and went up to the lighthouse that he remembers the most about. The lighthouse was a popular location because of the beautiful view of the ocean and it was especially beautiful during the sunset. He still remembers how beautiful the color of the sky was that day when he went with Taekwoon up to the lighthouse. It was a moment he would never forget because he felt like all the hate he got form his family afterwards, were washed away. It's true that it pained him when his family turned their backs on him but he was alright because there was Taekwoon by his side. Hakyeon threw everything he had away in order to be with the one he loved. 

Hakyeon decided to visit this place once more as he tried to find an answer to where his future lies. His many attempts of ending his own life have failed and he thought it might have been a sign. It could have been a sign that Taekwoon was keeping him alive and not wanting him to die, at least that's what he believed. 

"If only you could be here with me like before," Hakyeon said as he looked at the ocean. "Why am I still here when you've already left me?"

Why did you leave me alone? Why didn't you take me with you? 

He walked behind the lighthouse and found the wall in which he and Taekwoon wrote a message together when they came here together for the first time. It was a simple message written on the white painted walls, saying 'forever with you'. 

He really wanted 'forever' to last and that he could be with Taekwoon no matter where the latter was, whether it was heaven or hell. That was the only thing in his mind since the latter passed away. 

Hakyeon couldn't help but let his tears flow once more as he caressed the writings on the wall. Taekwoon's death was hard to accept and Hakyeon found it too hard to move forward. He really didn't want to go anywhere except find his way to Taekwoon's side once more. It might have been naive for him to think that everything revolved around someone who is no longer alive but Hakyeon couldn't help it. He cherished every moment he was able to spend with the other and Taekwoon changed his life since the day they met. That's how much the man, Jung Taekwoon, had affected him. 

Living was hard. Living with all these precious memories was even harder. It was painful.

So, he made his final attempt. 

Once more, he chose to say goodbye. Hakyeon closed his eyes as he stood at the very edge of the cliff. The wind was strong that day and the ocean water splashed up the cliff. It was as if the sea was inviting him inside, he gave in.

Hakyeon made no attempt to fight back or survive, he decided to simply let go of everything. He wanted to forget about everything once and for all. 

And he really did. 

He was washed away by the sea that summer and died in the ocean where no one knew about. 

His story was fated to have ended that way. That was what the ending of his book was originally written as. When he died, the book was smeared in black ink from drowning in despair. The pages of his story had scratch marks all over and even hints of ink splashes from page to page as if it was blood. These were all the signs of a book or the protagonist of that story, trying to kill himself over and over again. His name was eventually recorded in the record of the dead and his story was supposed to have ended. At least that's what fate wanted for him.

But for some unknown reason, he was given a second chance in life.

Without any memories of his suicidal attempts, his book reemerged within the Library of Fates. The book that was already smeared in black, was even more eerie than before. It could have been because of Hongbin's attempt to meeting someone he wasn't or it could have been something else. But if there was one thing that can be certain, is the fact that the story of Cha Hakyeon took on a second attemp at life by itself. 

It's as if he rewrote 'fate' by himself.

~

"But how? If he was supposed to have died, how did he come back to life? It doesn't make sense." Wonshik exclaimed.

"I don't know either. It wasn't like he was trying to live either, instead he wanted to die. But still he's alive," InGuk said.

"Yet he doesn't remember it, does he? Parts of his story are missing. I remember reading  about his attempts to kill himself but Hakyeon, himself has no recollection of ever doing those things. He doesn't even realize that he can't feel pain," Jaehwan recalls almost wanting to cry at times while reading Hakyeon's story because he sympathized with the young man's situation. "And everything was because of Jung Taekwoon... if only he knew..."

"Do you know if the Goddesses have anything to do with it?" Wonshik asked InGuk.

"They probably didn't think that this would happen. I have never seen a book given a second chance in life like Hakyeon did. It's true that some becomes reincarnated after they die but none of them would have the same life as they did after they die. And they would definitely not have the same memories as they did in their previous life. If Cha Hakyeon was reincarnated after he died, he would have a different name and different story with a different setting. Everything would be different but in his case, everything was the same except the ending itself and parts of his memories."

"So the reason for his book being smudged in black and scratched all over, the fact that it doesn't have an ending... it's because he had already died once right?" Wonshik commented as he took a glimpse at Hakyeon's book. Indeed, the appearance of Hakyeon's book was unsettling. "A story in which the ending have changed... a story that was given a second chance to rewrite itself..."

"Rewrite?" Jaehwan asked.

"Yeah. Don't you think so? When Hakyeon died the first time, everything should have ended at that time. His story should have come to an end but because his life is prolonged, his story continued and the ending was rewritten. It's like time went backwards for him and because it continued, he got to encounter Hongbin. It's almost like he was given a second chance just so that the two of them can meet," Wonshik commented. It was probably absurb to think that way but he couldn't help but feel that way now that he's learned about the story of Cha Hakyeon.

"If Hakyeon died and was never given a second chance, they would have never met... and Hongbin would have never discovered his book," Jaehwan said. "It's like Hongbin was fated to find Cha Hakyeon's book."

"Do you guys remember how Hongbin found the book in the first place?" InGuk asked.

"Kong said he found it while he was cleaning up the library the first week or so after he came into the facility. It was just lying around, hidden in the back of one the bookcases. But when he found it, it was already in this condition," Jaehwan told him. "It was so weird for him and that's why he got really curious about Hakyeon's story. The more he read about Cha Hakyeon, the more curious he got. Eventually, the two of us caught him hiding the book for himself."

"We should have stopped him but we didn't and now this..." Wonshik sighed.

"It's all my fault... I shouldn't have told him that he could go inside of Hakyeon's book," Jaehwan still blames himself.

"Hyung, stop blaming yourself would you?" Wonshik smacked him hard on the back.

"Sorry... I can't help it."

"It's true that telling him about the methods to visit Earth might not have been the smartest idea but what you did might not be so bad after all. Cha Hakyeon's story is full of mysteries but his book is one that might also help us answer the many questions we have about fate. Initially, he was fated to have died that one summer but his fate changed and continued to live. Hakyeon's story made me realize something and that is, it might be possible to change our fate," InGuk said.

"Change our fate..." Jaehwan and Wonshik looked at one another. 

"To be honest, I never thought that the two of you would eventually side with me and question about the practices of this facility or its beliefs. The two of you grew up with the mindset of believing the Goddesses and believing what fate has to offer. I thought that only me and Hongbin were the exceptions. But it seems I was wrong. The two of you chose friendship over your achievements and beliefs. This proves that the two of you are also beginning to change your fate as the servants of fate," InGuk told them. "Lee Hongbin is lucky to have the two of you as his friends."

"Yet he won't even talk with us right now," Jaehwan sighed sadly. "I'm really worried about him..."

"Same," Wonshik commented. "But how should we help him?"

The three of the contemplated for a minute of what to do after stealing the book back. Initially, they were going to hand the book to Hongbin in person and have the other hide from the facility with Hakyeon's story. But what good will that do for Hongbin when Hakyeon have already forgotten about him? However, as they opened the book to Hakyeon's story to see what was happening on the otherside, they were surprised. 

Hakyeon was beginning to remember things about Hongbin all on his own. Once again, his story has changed. Even though the council have erased Hongbin's existence from the story and the other stories that connects to it, Hakyeon's memories returned. 

His story was supposed to have ended ages ago and his memories should have been erased, yet it's as if his story was uncontrollable, Hakyeon remembered everything regarding to his encounter with Hongbin even if everyone else have forgotten. There was supposed to be missing texts within his book about Hongbin and even the name was erased from the book itself but little by little, those words reappeared in the story and his memories came back. 

That's why, InGuk decided to change his plans. 

Hakyeon was like the key to answering everything they have about fate and maybe the key to everything. With just a simple 'what if', InGuk decided to help Jaehwan and Wonshik get to the other side in order to meet Cha Hakyeon in person. 

"What if Cha Hakyeon were to know the truth and everything about Hongbin and this facility? What if he becomes aware of fate and his past?" he thought.

"But won't it be too dangerous?" Jaehwan asked as he feared for the consequences that may follow afterwards. "I mean, humans were never supposed to know about our existence or the fact that their stories were all predetermined by the Goddesses. If they were to find out... what will happen to the facility? To the Goddesses? And... to us?"

"We don't know. But this is a risk we have to take. Cha Hakyeon is the only one whose fate is completely out of fate's control. He may be the answer that we've been looking for all along and he might even help us escape the grasp of this facility. That's why, we have to take this risk," InGuk said. "Are you afraid?"

"A bit," Jaehwan told him honestly. "I mean, no one has ever done this before... this is a really big step and risk that we're taking. What if something goes wrong that might put us all in danger? Including Cha Hakyeon himself? If anything happens to Hakyeon, Hongbin will never forgive us."

"Don't worry. I'll keep an eye out for you two. You have my words. No matter what happens, I will protect the two of you. I brought you two into this mess and if anything does happen, I'll take all responsibility for this matter," InGuk promised them. "After the two of you enter Cha Hakyeon's story, make sure you keep a watch on him and decide with him about what to do. Once he becomes aware of the truth, we'll see what happens next. His realization might trigger something else and we will decide the next actions to take."

"I understand," Wonshik nodded. "We'll do our best."

Jaehwan also nodded in agreement. "Um, Seo InGuk Supervisor?"

"Yeah?"

"Please stay safe and... watch Hongbin for us while we're away."

"I will. I promise."

And thus, Jaehwan and Wonshik entered to the otherside. 

~

"Why are you stopping me!?" Taekwoon shouted in frustration as he slammed harshly on the desk.

"Calm down Taekwoon-ah," Hyoshin said as he sat in his chair of his office.

"Calm down?! They stole Hakyeon's book from the vault! How am I supposed to calm down?"

"It is all for the sake of finding the truth," Hyoshin said.

"Truth? Is this about the nonsense of our existence again?! I've done everything I was told, I went through enough just meeting Cha Hakyeon himself in order to get the results we wanted and now you want to just let this go?" Taekwoon was furious. "I won't let this go so easily. I have a mission and I'll do anything and everything that I can in order to get the results I want. I won't let anyone get in the way, even if it's you."

"Taekwoon-ah..." Hyoshin sympathized with the desperation in younger's eyes but before he could say anything at all, Taekwoon rushed out of the office.

Has fate changed you as well Jung Taekwoon? You weren't like this before... we should have never let you go to Earth alone. It's my fault that you met Cha Hakyeon. 

Everyone was changing. Everyone who has encountered the man named 'Cha Hakyeon' was starting to change one by one.

"Cha Hakyeon... are you our savior or are you our destruction?" he asked once more as he saw Taekwoon from his window, storming out towards the Library of Fates to retrieve the book back from Jaehwan and Wonshik.

A/N: The original title of this story was actually supposed to be 'Second Life' when I was initially writting the storyboard. It was a plot that was planned for since a year ago even when I was in the middle of writing my NEO/LeoN fanfics. I've had the idea for awhile and finally, we get to have a chapter that is named after the initial title; it made me feel quite content.