Was I wrong to fall in love with you? 

Unlike her previous relationships, Jongin was someone she had never regretted anything with.

Yunseul had been raised without a father, and had been taught from young to never mention the existence - or lack thereof - of a father in her life in the presence of her mother. Even at small, seemingly  irrelevant comments of the possibility of getting to know her father, or just having a fatherly male figure in her life someday, her late mother would have shot her a look to drop the matter, or her eyes would glisten with tears almost immediately - both of which would leave Yunseul quivering at her knees at the amount of pain and disgust the idea of her ex-husband/ex-boyfriend had left in her eyes, and in her.

Perhaps it was because of that that Yunseul never had the amount of security she had always hoped for in her life. Past relationships with non-committal guys who blamed her for her wishful thinking had taught her, at the age of 18, that maybe she would never have a family that truly belonged to her someday, because of how needy she could become once she fell in love.

It was exactly because she knew how easy it was to lose something, that she would cling so desperately on to it.

Jongin had entered her life as a friend of a friend, but then evolved to be the closest person in the world to her.

========

“I’ll introduce you to my best friend, but don’t throw yourself at him, okay?” Baekhyun joked that day. “I’ve known him forever, so don’t make me lose him because of you, okay?” 

Yunseul threw him a look and a playful punch on his shoulder, “I’m not like that, you know it.” 

Baekhyun laughed, “alright, but you may change your take on that when you see him. Girls fall at his feet and kiss the ground he walks on. That’s cool, but to see you do the same-” 

Yunseul punched his shoulder lightly again, laughing uncontrollably. How could she be in love with Baekhyun’s friend, when-

“I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m late.” A tall, lean boy with dark hair and a unique copper skin tone rushed towards them, his fringe glistening with sweat and his complexion ruddy from running, but that only further defined his handsome features; twinkling eyes, straight nose, full lips. He looked at Yunseul and the reddening in his cheeks seemed to have intensified.

“Jongin, Yunseul. Yunseul, Jongin.” Baekhyun smiled, making them shake hands. 

“Hi,” Yunseul smiled shyly, holding up her hand to offer a handshake. Jongin was definitely handsome, as Baekhyun had commented time and again, but Yunseul’s shyness had more to do with the fact that she was by herself slightly awkward and had made little friends due to this trait of hers. So to have to make human interaction with someone else other than Baekhyun, particularly with his best friend,  added a bit of stress to her encounter. “I’m Park Yunseul.” 

“Kim Jongin,” the handsome male took her hand and nodded, smiling shyly. 

“Jongin thinks you’re pretty,” Baekhyun winked at her, before laughing and slapping Jongin’s back lightly, and Yunseul turned to look at Jongin,

only to see the handsome pretty boy redden even more.

========

“Eomma… Eomma…” The tears left her eyes in torrents, gushing out of the crevices of her eyes as she wept without restrain, standing right in front of her mother’s coffin and photograph, the few people attending the wake casting saddened looks of sympathy at her, speculating her birth and parentage, wondering where her father was, and who exactly the tall dark-skinned boy holding her was. 

Jongin held her in his arms, her lithe frame drowning in the black hanbok, until the sleeve of his black suit was soaked through. He embraced her even more tightly, her hair gently and whispering to her, “it’s over now, it’s all over, things will get better, Seul, trust me, they will…” 

He held her, all the way, through those three excruciating days, the only one who was there for her during the most difficult period of her life, holding her, steadying her, and he was amazing. Upon the passing of her mother, he had quickly arranged for all the funeral proceedings to be done, had cleaned her mother’s room with her, had offered everything and himself to her to be there for her, to do everything that Baekhyun, her closer friend, couldn’t do for her in his absence. 

Jongin gave her every part of him, unbridled, unrestrained, completely and totally.

The warmth and love that Jongin gave her, the same warmth and love she found difficult reciprocating, that was the start of it all. 

The first time she felt that perhaps, she needs Jongin. 

Perhaps she will need him for a long time. 

========

“Yunseul-ah,” he smiled boyishly, before producing a large bouquet of roses, slightly squashed, from his backpack and holding it out to her. 

Yunseul steadied herself on the swing, halting its movement, but her hands still clasped around the metal chains suspending the seat of the swing, and looking at him curiously. 

“Jongin-ah, you ran all the way there just to get these for me?” She felt a spike hot, warm and overwhelming slash through her heart, thinking about all the things he had done for her. 

He knelt down, flowers in hand. “I know yo