She was somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean when she decided she would spare Baekhyun the pathetic details. Yes, she told herself. She would not dwell and wallow once the plane lands on British soil, about Jongin and her relationship, and her job – because these were just nitty-gritties, nothing to write home about. The job thing was secondary, and her relationship with Jongin was fine. Not going as she expected, but they were fine, even if they had just argued the night before. But she did give herself the duration of the flight to think about Jongin and her future with him.

So when she landed she was in a much better mood than before, ready to greet and catch up with Baekhyun. She had told Baekhyun not to come to Heathrow – that she would take a taxi to his apartment. But she was hoping that he would come anyway. While she lived at the heart of Seoul, Cheongdamdong, no less – she was intimidated by big cities, particularly foreign ones. She had only ever been to London – with Jongin – and then on the coast to Jeju and Busan with her late mother, and that hardly counted. So she was relieved to see Baekhyun waiting for her just outside of customs, grinning and boyish and happy as ever. He was wearing new framed glasses, only this time they were brown. He rushed towards her and hugged her hard around the neck. They both started laughing. 

“It's so good to see you! Here. Give me your bag.” He smiled.

“You too.” She grinned back at him. “I like your glasses.”

“Do they make me look smarter?” He pushed the frames on his nose and struck a scholarly pose.

“Much.” She giggled. 

“It’s about time you visited.” He said, maneuvering her luggage through the crowd. They made their way outside, into the cab line. 

The weather was exactly as she had remembered – grey, drizzling and slightly chilly. Within minutes they were in the back of a black cab, her bags at their feet. He started to ask her how she felt, and for a second she thought that Jongin had somehow filled him in on the details, and he knew that she had heeded his advice about talking about marriage. But then she realised it was just the standard postflight questioning.

“Oh, fine,” she smiled. “I’m really psyched to be here.”

“Jet-lagged?”

“A little.” She wondered why he didn’t ask about Jongin and why he wasn’t there.

“A pint will fix that,” he smiled. “No napping. We have a lot to do in a week.”

She laughed. “Like what?”

“Sightseeing. Boozing. Reminiscing. Time-consuming, intense stuff… It’s really nice to see you.” He hadn’t realised how much he had missed her, but now that she was here, he was really, really happy, and couldn't contain it. 

They arrived at Baekhyun’s apartment in Kensington. She hadn’t bothered to book a hotel – Jongin and she always stayed with Baekhyun on the occasions they visited him. He had decorated his apartment much more over the years; his furniture was sleek and modern, and his walls were covered with abstract paintings and posters of jazz musicians. At a corner of his living room, next to his stereo, were a bunch of CDs strewn haphazardly over the floor. She smiled. Same old Baekhyun.

As soon as she was showered and changed, they left for the Buckingham Palace because she wanted to watch the changing of guards that day. As they waited for time to pass, they found themselves seated on a wide expanse of grass nearby, her bag and their jackets resting next to them. 

He rested his weight on his palms on the grass. “So how are you and Jongin? Did you talk about the marriage thing?” he waited patiently, and when she did not reply, he pressed further but gently, “I noticed you didn’t look too happy at the airport, but I didn’t want to mention it. Did something happen?”

And it’s more than his question – but his observation, his understanding of her, that causes a sharp pain in her chest. tightened as she struggled not to cry – over how attentive he was, over the anxieties of her and Jongin, and over her seemingly bleak future at work, the parts of her that made her who she was. 

“Oh God. I knew it,” Baekhyun said, placing an arm on her shoulder. 

“Knew what?” She said, her voice breaking slightly.

“That your stiff-upper-lip, ‘I don’t care about where this is going’ thing was just about you putting up a strong front.” He sighed. “What happened?”

She finally tells him everything, no editing. Even about her job. So much for her vow over the Atlantic, she shook her head at herself silently. 

When she was finished, Baekhyun said, “Hey, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have asked you to talk about it, and then you kept thinking about it… I thought he was ready.”

“No, it’s okay.” she shook her head. “The topic was bound to come up sooner or later. He surprised me by mentioning it, though. And it’s not really about the argument last night – I’ve lately been feeling uncertain about this relationship.”

“What do you mean?” 

“I just feel that.” She sighed. “Increasingly, we’re becoming one of those couples.” 

He stared at her. “Which couples?”

“Those couples – one hugely successful, the other one lacking in many ways and regressing. Those couples who return home but don’t talk much to each other, it’s either we fight or we only say everyday things, like ‘hey could you make me a cup of tea” or unnecessarily many ‘I love you’s to fill the silence…”

He chuckled slightly. “Is it that bad?”

She laughed. “Nah, not that bad.” She shrugged. “Sometimes he’s a little unreasonable, though.” 

“He’s Jongin. Of course he’s unreasonable.” He laughed, but not in an unkind manner, rather in a playful, comfortable, affectionately joking manner. 

She shrugged. “And irresponsible with his words.” She sighed. “When we argued, he said something along the lines that I didn’t always have to work so hard, and that I could quit whenever I want.”

His jaw dropped. “Are you kidding? He said that?”

“I know.” She shook her head and pushed back her hair from her face. “I was like, ‘do you even understand me at all?’ And just before I left for London, he told me, ‘sometimes I feel like you intentionally make life difficult for yourself’ – basically insinuating that he doesn’t understand why I do what I do.”

Baekhyun shook his head. “It’s just stressed talk, don’t worry about it. You know he didn't mean it.”

"I don't know. It was a bit unreasonable though."

"Come on, Yunseul. He's Jongin. Of course he doesn't understand. Life is as straightforward as they come for him. If you don't tell him anything, he'll assume you think exactly the way you say you do." He shrugged, resting his arms on his knees. "It's not like you don't know all of this, he's a chaebol, life is simple - he goes to school, he graduates, he takes over his father's business. He dates, he marries, he has a family. The rest of his time is spent on work. That