chapter 1

Is there any lies for the goodness?

smile

strength

everytime

just saw your bareface when i woke up give me strength like fuel to endure the day.

"wake up" said the man while tugging the blanket, something move under the blanket indicated there are someone still in deep sleep

"wake up sleeping beauty"

"just five more minutes" said the man under blanket with a hoarse voice

"you said that for ten times already wake up you have morning classes today I have to go , don’t pass your breakfast okay" the tall man look to his reflection once again on the mirror before walk towards the door untill he heard footstep behind him trying to approach him, the tall man turn over to face the smaller

"wait you just leave me every morning for almost one weeks already , what's going on? I thought you have morning class too but when I asked hansol he said you don’t have morning class. Did you hide something from me John,didn’t you? " asked the smaller

Johnny not sure if it was really the one who still in deep slept a minutes ago , now the other is standing in front of him with full eyes it means that he was already awake for God knows when

"Ten you awake , I thought you still under your blanket a minutes ago"

"don’t change subject" Ten looked at Johnny with a hawk face Johnny knew very much he can't no longer lying to his boyfriend

"I have work to do Ten,actually my mom give me opurtunity to work in one of her place so I took the chance and now I worked in two place start at morning until afternoon right before class and when class indeed I goes to the coffee shop at evening and my last work is to fetch you at your workplace" Johnny smiled

"why didn't you tell me before?" ten lower his voice guilty start raising in his chest

"I’m sorry , you looks so tired with all of your stuff beside you must work too in the evening so we often met lately , believe me I want to tell you once we have time but you already asked me now"said the taller while fixing the smaller hair whom still looks messy from bed

"no i’m sorry, John it must be hard to working in two place everyday and i’m sorry for yell at you" he shook his head feeling useless all of sudden

"it's okay Ten , you said that we must take the chance we have right? I really have to go now please don’t be sad we can make it up on weekend okay" the smaller just nodded and give hug to the taller and nuzzled his face to his chest

‘thank you’ said him with low voice

Just if Ten knows everythings

~~~~~

cold

it's always cold

cold whenever I'm around you

I can be your warmth

just let me

please,

if you rainbow then i'm your rain , if you a rose then I'm your torn , love is not about having is about how you keep the one you love happy no matter what.

red

rancid smell

blood

it's always dark in here the lightning is just across from bedroom in the livingroom, there is shadow of the man in his knees in the corner of bedroom with teary eyes, bleeding in his hands maybe the reason why he is crying . maybe. Just when he trying to sleep

"hyung oh my God" the man didn’t knows how someone could enter his house not until he sees the anxiousty on the other face. it’s always been like this , everytime he thought he could say good bye to this cruel world there are always one person who keep his life.

"your hand bleeding tae , let's go to the hospital"

dark

it's always dark around you

but

i'll be your light

just let me

please

white ceiling is the first view he sees when he wokes up , this is familiar place for him. he felt the warmth in his left hand and when he turn to see what was that he saw jaehyun sleeping  while holding his hand, he clearly remembered what he trying to do before with his left hand , how he just want to die yet the boy who still sleeping besides him always find him at the right time.

“Tae you woke up , uh i'm sorry” he murmured while rubbing his eyes, the grip in his hand lost and he came face to face with Jaehyun

"I wanna go home" taeyong said with cold stoic voice Jaehyun nodded and smile his dimples look s